TC: Remix
by LunarLacrimosa
Summary: Miles Lancaster, the ex-bestie of Sam? After finding a damaged Barricade everything changes for the young teen and he drags the growling 'con along for the ride. A Sparkling, Cons joining the Bots, and more! Mech/human later on. (Updated and changed version of TC)
1. Author's note

Hello everybody! If you're new to this story then I just want to say a quick hello and thank you for giving it a try. Reviews help feed and guilt me.

If you're old to this story: welcome back! Hopefully you'll enjoy this just as much, if not more, then the first version!

**I just want one promise from you:**

_If you enjoy this story at all then review and remind me to update. Yell at me to update. I want to continue it, but sometimes I just get in a drag and think it's okay. The me of now wants to be yelled at if I dare abandon this story again, because it is my baby. I want it to grow from what it was originally to what it should have been from the start.  
_

I won't keep you any longer. Go ahead and get started!


	2. Chapter 1

Barricade pulled into a small covered area, stopping his engine and letting his own systems start to repair themselves. He'd had to drive through the forest for awhile, mindful enough to be thankful for his somewhat slim alt frame and that the undergrowth wasn't impossible to drive through. This place he found provided him some protection from whatever elements might decide to rain down on him with the number of trees around, and he had enough room to stand and stretch without being noticed if he wished to shift into his bipedal form.

After being beaten by the Autobot Scout Bumblebee he hadn't made it to Mission City in time to fight for the Allspark. It was later, after nearly a month of silence that he heard from Starscream that Megatron was dead. He had already known that, of course, because he had never been sent for. He might have failed, but he had been loyal, and loyalty like his was repaid if failures weren't made often. He was one of the few mechs that Megatron liked enough to keep in his general company, and while he didn't care much for his leader he didn't feel like dying any time soon and preferred to play nice.

His temporary partner, Frenzy, was also dead, and it was just another thing he didn't need Starscream to tell him about. Barricade would never have called them close but he did get a small amount of amusement from the little glitch. Frenzy was hyperactive, insane, and usually difficult to understand even when he did speak only one language at one time. It didn't surprise Barricade at all when he found out; Starscream seemed to relish the little mech's death more than appropriate, though.

A couple of days ago Starscream had found him, and he wished he would have just been left to fend on his own instead. He had never liked Seekers, their view of being better than the 'groundlings' annoying to him. Starscream had always been one of the worst to deal with, and there had never been any love between them, especially not with Barricade more favored by their Lord then the Seeker himself. So naturally when Starscream had arrived and started to order him around in the same second, Barricade had grown angry, and spat out that he'd rather turn into an Autodolt then be under Starscream's command. That hadn't gone over well with the temperamental Seeker. He'd already been wounded from his fight with the Autobot Scout, the Seeker ripping into him in his already mostly defenseless state just left him that much worse for wear.

And he couldn't even work on himself. He was a warrior, not a medic. He knew the basics, certainly. Most anyone with a sane processor that was in the Decepticon army did. However, he did not know enough to help his body with the stuff it needed to heal. Most of the time pain receptors couldn't be turned off unless the medic was highly skilled and more than capable in his work, and he was neither highly skilled nor capable with working on himself. So Barricade trying to patch up a coolant line would be the equivalent of a human going in to sew up a torn vein, without any pain medication or the like, and failing meant that he could hurt himself worse, or die, so it would just have to stay that way until somemech more capable from his team came along.

With nothing else to do he had drifted into stasis, a Cybertronian's version of a coma, often times medically induced by their own bodies if badly hurt, where his self-repair systems could work on some of the major and minor stuff.

* * *

If there was one thing Miles Lancaster knew it was that his best friend, Sam Witwicky, had started acting odd ever since he bought that old beaten up Camaro. After Sam had ditched him at the lake for Mikaela he had seen very little of his friend-if they even were still friends. He knew he had been a little harsh towards Mikaela that day, but he worried for Sam, and didn't want him hurt. And the way Sam was acting wasn't angry, anyway.

Miles couldn't say he actually hated Mikaela, even though he acted that way. He felt bad for his friend, who had liked Mikaela since first grade. From his, and practically everyone else's, observations Mikaela would never even look at Sam as dating material. So he had insulted and made fun of, hoping to drive his friend into finally getting over his misplaced crush. He was as shocked as everyone else that Mikaela was actually dating Sam, and couldn't help but think it wouldn't last long. Most of him hoped that it would last, though, and that it wasn't just some cruel bet or something like that.

Both Mikaela and Sam had disappeared for a few days, and when they came back Sam had a brand new Camaro and he and Mikaela were dating. It was fall by now and school had started back up, all of them in their last official year. Despite trying to hang out with Sam he was always busy with something or another, and even in school Mikaela and Sam tended to stick together and whisper to each other. Miles knew they were hiding something, and it had all started with that car.

He was upset with his friend. Even if he had been initially angry about anything said about his girlfriend, Miles had long ago made it clear that he was alright and happy with their relationship. And with everything that had obviously happened to the other teen it just made it worse because Sam wouldn't tell him despite how long the two had been friends.

In his most recent attempt to reconnect with Sam he had walked all the way to Sam's house just to be turned away because he was washing the Camaro and had a date with Mikaela later. So that left Miles with nothing to do but trudge back to his house in a defeated manner, and he didn't much feel like putting up with his mom's worried questioning, so he opted to go for a walk on some of the old walking trails in the forests near town.

He was angry at Sam, angry at Mikaela, angry at that blasted Camaro, but mostly he was angry at himself. Miles knew, in a way, that trying to reconnect with Sam at this point in time was hopeless without a catalyst. He knew he needed to think about a lot of things, like how much longer he could try to keep up the now seemingly one sided friendship that he was even reluctant to call a friendship, but he had always been stubborn.

Sam wasn't his only friend in school, but the teen was his closest. They had been best friends since they were little, and had gone through a lot together. For all intents and purposes they were basically brothers, or they had been. Their families were tight friends too, and during family reunions the boys would go to one another's and meet up with their 'extended family'. That's just how tight they were. All that had changed, and Miles couldn't figure out why. He felt like Sam had gone through something huge and left him on the opposite side of some gaping chasm. Something big had separated them, but he didn't know _what_.

Kicking a can hard just for being in his way, he jumped when the sound of it connecting with another metal object reached his ears. The can had flown through some bushes, and Miles shoved through them, curiosity and annoyance at his previous thoughts dictating he check it out. He wasn't sure what he had been expecting, but what he found was certainly not it.

A Saleen police cruiser sat surrounded by brush and trees as if hiding, the car itself banged up and filthy. Circling it, Miles found the words "to punish and enslave" on it instead of the usual police car slogan. Confused, he looked inside the windows finding it was unlocked, and looked to be abandoned if the layer of dust on it was any indication.

Taking a step back he looked at the car thoughtfully. It certainly looked like it hadn't been used in years, and he carefully opened up the driver's side door so that he could search inside of it. There was nothing indicating that anyone owned it, no documentation or any sort of papers in the glovebox. He stepped back and looked over the entire vehicle once more. With a bit of elbow grease the car could be made to look amazing once more.

An idea was already forming in his head. Maybe this was exactly what he could use to try and get closer to Sam again. Mikaela's dad owned a car repair shop, after all, and he loosely knew that the girl herself was an amazing mechanic. If he could get closer to Mikaela by asking her questions about repairs, maybe even having her look at the car and see what she'd recommend, then that would be a sure fire way of getting his best friend back. Maybe he could even earn some money by selling it, after checking with the local police, of course.

Satisfied with this new idea, Miles went home. By that Monday Miles had printed out all the papers he had thought would be useful. Things on how to hotwire a car, change tires, check the different systems, and some information about what should be going on under the hood, all the while silently thanking God for google. After school he filled up a container with gas, put it, a tool kit, and the papers in his back pack, and then biked back to where he had found the police cruiser.

He put the gas in the car, and then tried to hot wire it. Tried being the key word. An hour later he was thoroughly pissed off even with the directions on the printed papers, and he was about to give up when the car suddenly sprang to life.

"Finally!" he cried happily, pumping a fist in the air and finding the button to pop the hood.

Miles didn't pause to give how the car started up a second thought, he figured that he just finally managed to hot wire it. Looking under the hood he whistled at what he saw. He was no car buff, but even he could tell that was a pretty nice engine. Then again, he just naturally assumed anything that nice and shiny looking had to count as pretty nice. Grabbing the tool kit, he bent down to take a closer look, letting his hands roam over the engine. When the engine gave a sudden roar he jerked in surprise, narrowly avoiding slamming his head off the hood as he gave the engine a wide eyed look, only relaxing when it gave a choked sputtered and came to a quick stop.

* * *

Barricade was less than pleased to wake up to numerous alerts telling him that some stupid organic was playing with some of his wires. It took a moment for the Decepticon to feel less disoriented-coming out of stasis as fast as he did left the processor slow to catch up-but he quickly realized that the organic was trying to hot wire him, and let his engine start accordingly. He took a moment to scan himself when the organic backed off and cheered, interested to see that the creature had apparently replenished the gas in his tank. It was nothing close to energon, and perhaps that was why his repairs had done so little, but it was enough to give him some renewed energy.

Barricade realized his processor was still incredibly sluggish, hardly noticing the organic find the button to pop his hood open and then actually going around and lifting it open to look inside at his engine. He gave an angry rev when he did realize what was going on, taking some small enjoyment in the organic's startled reaction, but his engine quickly choked and gave up. As unhappy as he was to feel those disgusting hands messing around with delicate parts, the young organic did seem to know at least some of what he was doing.

He had just come out of stasis lock, and knew that staying low was his best option. He wanted to live, and as pleasing as the thought of squishing the inferior insect in front of him was, the last thing he wanted was the Autobots on his case. It didn't help that with him feeling as sluggish as he was he'd most likely not even be able to transform.

Barricade scanned the fleshling, and picking through his memory files, found him to be extremely similar to LadiesMan217. They appeared to be about the same age, and since he wasn't far from Tranquility, it wasn't a leap to assume that they went to the same school and might even know each other.

He decided that letting the fleshy live was the best option, for now. The thing seemed intent on fixing him for some reason, and Barricade would allow it that privilege. It would be quicker and easier than letting his systems do all the work. He scanned the surrounding area, searching through the internet for any possible information he might find useful while letting the insect work. He didn't have any pending alerts on his comm link, meaning no mech was attempting to communicate with him. A good few months had passed and there was no word from any of the Decepticons.

Barricade wasn't sure how he felt about that.

* * *

For the next few days Miles returned to his spot in the woods, working on the car. He didn't bother to tell anyone where he was going or what he was doing, mainly because his parents assumed he was smart enough to not be doing anything stupid, and he was only going after school was over and his homework was done.

He set out earlier on Saturday morning, making several trips on his bike. He had decided to start working on the outside of the car to get all the filth off, only able to do so much to repair the rest of it. He had no idea that the vehicle he was working on was alive, much less that it could feel everything he was doing to it. Because of that he decided to just fill the buckets up at the stream, the water already chilling to touch.

Cybertronians could survive the deep cold of space easily. They could even survive some high temperatures, depending on how high, of course. This did not mean, however, that they did not know the difference between hot and cold. They did, and they preferred, just like anything normal, to be in the middle. If one was in a mild climate and was suddenly attacked by cold they wouldn't like it, just like a human.

Barricade was in recharge when it happened. When Miles splashed the hood and windshield with that cold water, Barricade sprang out of recharge in shock. He forgot all about lying low and about letting the insect live, rage filling him instead at being awakened so rudely.

"_WHAT THE FRAG IS WRONG WITH YOU?_" he roared, starting his engine quickly and rolling across the few feet separating him and the fleshy, aiming to knock him to the ground.

Needless to say Miles was shocked, and stumbled back as Barricade drew closer. He stuttered out an automatic apology, falling on his ass as the police cruiser hit his shins, trying to crab crawl away desperately. His mind was just barely processing that the car was not only moving on its own, but talking as well, and that it seemed to be very displeased with him.

There was silence for a moment as the car stopped moving and Miles stopped trying to scramble away, nothing but the birds twittering happily and the sound of the leaves as they swayed in the breeze. Miles stared at the vehicle in front of him, getting the odd feeling that this was a very big moment in his life, and he wanted it to go well. If it didn't, well... that wasn't too hard to guess.

"You'll catch flies like that, fleshy." Barricade growled, and Miles got the feeling he was somehow being glared at.

Miles closed his mouth with an audible click as his teeth smacked together. Two minutes ago and the teen would have never pictured a talking car outside of the television or a book, and now it was real? His mind was racing with what he should say, should ask, and should do. Should he tell someone, or was the car wanting it's apparent life to be a secret? What did one say to a living car, anyway? Especially one that seemed to be unhappy with you? After another moment of indecision he decided to choose annoyance and he crossed his arms over his chest, leveling his own glare at the car in front of him.

"Now you look here, I'm not going to put up with any of this 'Ohhh, I'm a talking car! Let's scare poor Miles out of his wits!' nonsense! It's just cold water, you over-sized baby." Miles scolded, intent on making sure the car knew he wasn't scared nor would he be bossed around, only to bite his lip because the way the police cruiser twisted on its wheels and slumped a bit just screamed shock. He'd never thought cars could look like any kind of emotion before, but he never thought they could be alive either.

"You find out I can talk, and you must realize I could easily run you over, and _you_ tell _me_ off?" Barricade asked in disbelief, slowly starting to realize that the organic in front of him was clearly insane.

"Probably not the best thing to say, I admit." Miles allowed, bending over to retrieve the now empty bucket, "But either way if you were going to run me over you wouldn't wait until now to do it. Besides, you owe me."

"I..." Barricade trailed off, trying to see how Miles had possibly come to that conclusion, before laughing at the seeming audacity of that statement. "I owe you?"

"Yes, you owe me. I've spent close to a week fixing you up as best as I could, and today I planned to wash all that dirt off you." Miles replied, "I'm Miles Lancaster, and I'm not afraid of a dirty police car that looks like it's seen better days. Especially not one that gets cranky over a bit of cold water."

"You will address me as Barricade, fleshling." Barricade growled, "And if I didn't find you so useful you'd be dead. Watch your insolent tone."

Miles snorted and grinned, giving Barricade a mock salute. He realized how stupid it was to say those things to a car that could think, and seemed pretty pissed off at him, but what did he have to lose? The car, apparently called Barricade, hadn't done anything more to him than tap against his shins, so he felt relatively safe. The thought of fleeing was tossed aside by the amazement and excitement he felt. A talking car was pretty darned cool, in the long run.

Wisely he kept his mouth shut, allowing Barricade to cool off before bothering to ask any questions. The car gave him permission to go ahead and clean him off anyway and despite how eager he was to talk to the car, he spent his time cleaning the police cruiser off. It took a while, but after a few hours of hard work he got most of the dirt and grime off. He took a moment to circle Barricade, noting any scratches and dents he should attempt to tackle later. Smiling to himself, he sat a few feet away from the Decepticon and grabbed his lunch out of his back pack.

"Sho," Miles started with food in his mouth, using his hand as a napkin. Etiquette wasn't exactly on his mind. "Wha' exactly are you?"

"First off, fleshling, you are disgusting." Barricade informed him, tone sounding amazingly disgusted at the teen's actions. "And why exactly should I tell you anything?"

Miles managed to swallow before answering him, "Well, no one's come to find you and you haven't left this area. Seems like I'm all you got for company."

"Lucky me," Barricade drawled sarcastically.

"Look, I know nothing about you. I started fixing you up because I planned to sell you, since getting a job would be too time consuming, and you were going to be my ticket to solving the mystery..." A pause, and then he grinned. He was getting off track. "But I guess that idea just flew out the window. I doubt you'd like to be sold. I helped fix you up, and while I do appreciate you not killing me and all, you could still at least tell me what you are, how you got here, and what happened to you. You have nothing to lose by doing it, but if you tell me more about yourself maybe I could help you out more."

"Fine." Barricade said simply, seeing the point Miles made. He had nothing to lose by telling the fleshy, if anything he could gain a bit and have Miles fix him up further if he explained things.

* * *

By the time Barricade got done telling him the shortened version the sun was getting ready to set. He had explained about Cybertron and the war between the Autobots and the Decepticon, how he ended up on Earth and what he had done on the planet, told of having Frenzy but losing the tiny Decepticon, and then later having Starscream fight him. He didn't lie about what he did to try to get Archibald Witwicky's glasses off of Ladiesman217, he didn't see the point even if it did scare Miles away. Miles waited until he was done to ask any questions, and they spent another half hour answering those.

Finding out everything was more than a bit shocking, and the teen used the questions more as a way to avoid talking about Sam then actually being curious just yet. His best friend—if he could even still call Sam that—had known about Barricade much longer than he had, and apparently the two were supposed to be enemies. The whole thing about Cybertronians having no true gender but taking the pronouns on anyway confused Miles to no end, but if Barricade wanted to be called a he instead of an it than he would be called that.

Miles thought that probably meant he should leave and tell Sam about Barricade immediately, let his old friend know everything and have whoever needed to take care of the talking police car take care of it, but he also knew from the sounds of it that the robot in front of him was virtually defenseless. He hadn't seriously hurt Sam, just bruised him up a little and scared the piss out of him. Miles had done worse to his friend in all their years together. And for some reason he wanted to try and protect Barricade, because it sounded like everyone else had abandoned the Decepticon. How bad could he really be if he was willingly telling him everything and hadn't actually killed him?

"I know Sam," Miles admitted after a few minutes of silence, "we've been friends for forever. Well, we were friends, I'm not sure anymore. But this does explain a lot, especially about his car… Oh, and don't worry. I'm not going to tell him or that Bumblebee about you. I've spent precious time on fixing you up; the last thing I want is for the Autobot to damage you."

"You seem even more stupid then the average fleshling. To LadiesMan217 I am the bad guy, and I even threatened him." Barricade informed him, moving back a few feet so he was in his original spot.

"You threatened him, never hurt him. Scared him, but you scared me too, at first. Sam may be my friend, but he's been a piss poor one lately, and I don't owe him anything. You don't seem the type to attack him just for revenge over Megatron's death, especially since you know he has that Autobot watching over him. If I thought you were a threat I'd attempt to do something about it, but I don't think you are." He explained, standing up straight again to look at Barricade.

"I take that 'seem' back, you are even more stupid then the average fleshling." Barricade growled, scanning the fleshling once more. Nothing unusual about him, but he was reacting a lot differently than he had expected one of his kind to. Especially someone he could kill so easily. Barricade continued once he was satisfied with the scan, taking on a tone that not many would argue with even among the Decepticons. "You will come back tomorrow and I will show you my bipedal form. You can get to even more that way. And that is an order, fleshling. I expect you here by seven in the morning."

Miles just laughed, "Yeah, yeah. Goodnight, Barry!"

The teen was already out of Barricade's line of sight when the 'con registered what he'd been called, but Miles could still hear the angry rev of an engine, and he grinned to himself.


	3. Chapter 2

Barricade was irritated. He was surprised by the gall the fleshy dared to show after he found out that the Cybertronian was alive, and then the next day when he didn't appear at the time he had ordered him to. He could easily kill the impudent fleshy and he was positive that the annoying creature knew that. So the fact that the fleshy acted that way threw his processor for a loop.

He sat there in silence up until noon, waiting as patiently as he could for the organic, before deciding that the insect deserved to be scared a bit for making him wait. He changed into his bipedal form, setting himself down to wait. He didn't have to wait long until he could hear the organic making it's way to where he had found the Cybertonian. Using his advanced systems he estimated just where the tiny little creature would come through the shrubbery, and leaned down just enough so his face would be in the correct area.

"You're late!" he boomed, just as the fleshy came through and stopped in shock at seeing him. That shock didn't last long at all.

"That is so cool! You're huge! Eyes, oops I mean optics, are red, very nice touch. Makes you look even more badass. Not that you needed it, but I think the Autobot blue would definitely take your badass-ness down half a notch. Face is very pointy. Ouch looking." Miles rambled, grinning up at the shocked Decepticon.

The teen rocked back and forth on his heels a bit, head tilted to get a better look. Barricade sat back just to scan the organic for what had to be about the fiftieth time, watching as Miles swung his back pack on to the ground and stepped closer to the Decepticon. He didn't feel as surprised as he should by the organic's reaction, finding that the fleshy acting in a surprising manner wasn't actually surprising at all. If he had acted the way Barricade had expected him to then he probably would have been more surprised. Then again, if he had acted anything like Barricade had ever expected him to, he wouldn't even be here today.

He wondered if Starscream had hit him hard enough to make his processor glitch. There was just no way that he was capable of getting used to the organic in front of him that quickly; nor was it like he was actually happy to see the organic return to him. But as much as he wanted to ignore it, he knew why. Being abandoned by his own kind and having no friendly face to turn to, not even a single mech who would even come near him without bearing their weapons, it wasn't how he wanted to live. He wasn't a hugely sociable mech, but those he did get used to he wanted to stay around. Frenzy, his Race Track Patrol team, Brawl and Blackout... He was a mech of habit and he loathed for that to change. Now there was no habit to fall on to, no certainty. So it left him looking to the only thing he could attach himself to.

Miles cracked his fingers, standing near one of Barricade's feet. He took a moment to look the Decepticon over with curious eyes, circling around him to examine his back. He guessed that if Barricade bothered to stand up he'd be about seventeen feet tall, but how wide he'd be Miles had no idea. From the looks of it he didn't think a Cybertronian could be fat, but he certainly wasn't going to ask or even bring the matter of weight up. He didn't want to become a pancake just to find out that Cybertonian mechs didn't like talking about their weight. He noted how the finger like appendages ended in claws and didn't spend much time thinking what Barricade could have used them for.

"So, whatcha want me to do, Barry? I don't have long, gotta get home and do my homework." Miles came to a stop in front of the mech, craning his neck to look up at him.

Barricade glared down at the fleshy, "My name is Barricade, fleshling."

"And my name is __Miles__," Miles replied easily, not fazed by the glare in the least. "Not fleshling, fleshy, human, insect, squishy, soon-to-be-pancake, or whatever else you might call me."

"Fine, human designated as Miles, you will be able to get at even more under my armor this way. Tomorrow, perhaps, you can help me with some dents." Barricade made it sound like it was something Miles should be honored to do.

Miles let out an exasperated sigh, happy that his name was at least somewhere in there. When a large and clawed servo suddenly wrapped around him he let out a squeak that he'd later be embarrassed about, unused to the foreign feeling of something so large and hard wrapping around him. It was even worse when Barricade just lifted him up, his feet dangling out of the Decepticon's grasp and the feeling of just how small he was to the 'con unnerving him.

Barricade let him squirm for a moment, allowing the organic to adjust in his grip enough to free his arms, and then drew him up close to his face, letting his vents blow air out onto him. The teen took this as a sign that the mech wouldn't mind being touched, and he examined the face plates curiously, tentatively reaching out a hand to touch one of the cheek ridges. When Barricade didn't pull him away he allowed his hands to explore a bit, enjoying the feel of the smooth alien metal even when he did run across one of the sharp edges.

"Hmm," Barricade drawled thoughtfully, "I'm not as disgusted as I thought I would be. I actually find your touch tolerable."

The mech actually sounded surprised, and Miles let out a snort. As interesting as exploring what the 'con felt like was, it just didn't exactly warm his heart to be insulted in such a way.

"Way to kill the mood man. I'd 'preciate it if you stopped man handling me and put me down." Miles complained, squirming in Barricade's grip to emphasize his point.

Making a small grunt of confirmation, Barricade laid down on his back, setting Miles on his chest plates. Once the teenager steadied himself, the Decepticon instructed him on a few things to do, getting Miles to give him the Cybertronian equivalent of a massage on tense or overworked muscles.

He let the tiny creature work as he ran diagnostic scans on himself, searching for anything else that might need attended to quickly. Next he ran a scan of the area, making sure no stupid Autobots were out and about anywhere near to him. He might be getting used to the organic and find him tolerable, but that didn't mean he wouldn't get a kick out of scaring the tiny creature. His first attempt had been foiled, and he hardly counted startling the fleshy when he grabbed him. He had yet to tell the fleshy of their holoforms, and quietly activated his to appear behind Miles.

Barricade's holoform was male, and tall, towering over Miles by about a foot. He already had a set image, but the organic mech was the default form for all the Decepticons, and he didn't much feel like using that one anymore. Instead he opted to go with lighter, but still dark, brown hair and mustache-less. He found a random face on the internet from an obituary clipping, manipulating the nanites just how he wanted them until he looked how he wanted. He kept it simple with red eyes and a police uniform to match his alt mode.

Smirking to himself, he watched the teen work diligently on him for a moment. Then he reached out and grabbed Miles' arm, laughing when the teen jumped and nearly lost his balance, the only thing keeping him in place being Barricade's grip on his arm.

"And here I was hoping for another one of your oh so manly squeaks," Barricade taunted, a smirk still on the holoform's face.

"Dude! Fuck you." Miles huffed, glaring at Barricade, before jerking his arm out of the Decepticon's grasp. "I think you have way too much time on your hands—servos, whatever—if you get your jollies by playing scare the human. Maybe try out some movies or TV shows on the 'net."

"I hardly need to if you're here to provide me entertainment, fleshling." Barricade replied haughtily.

"I do have _school_," Miles reminded him, "And a family. I'd say a life in general, but that's already covered by school and family. There are some days I might not be here at all to 'entertain' you, like if I get sick or my mom kidnaps me for private time. And my name, remember?"

Barricade gave that some thought, and deciding that Miles might have a point, he growled. "You're lucky you're at least a little right, _flesh—Miles._ I still need to lay low for a couple of weeks, make sure the Autodolts think I'm disposed of before I make a break for it. As much as I hate to see what you pathetic things come up with, I can't exactly do anything to entertain myself without drawing attention..."

Miles nodded at whatever the Decepticon was saying, feeling proud of himself for having succeeded in curbing any further attempts at scaring him to death. By now the teen was beginning to think Barricade always talked with a growl. Miles went back to work on the 'con when he got a pointed look, asking what exactly the human looking and feeling guy had been. Once Barricade finished explaining about holograms and holoforms, Miles suggested the stupidest movie he could think of to get the 'con started.

A few hours later, Barricade had already accused Miles of sending him to the stupidest, most likely to kill brain cells, thing he could think of. He asked what movies and shows the teen really liked, and doing a quick search about their contents, was satisfied about his answer, resolving to give some of them a try later. Miles gingerly climbed off of Barricade, going and picking up his backpack. After spending so long on hard metal his legs ached, but he figured complaining wasn't the best way to get on the mech's good side. He paused in thought, and turned to the Decepticon with a questioning look.

"If I can't come for some reason, how am I supposed to tell you?" he asked, slinging his backpack onto one shoulder.

"Give me your phone," Barricade ordered, letting his holoform reappear and holding out a hand to receive the device.

Hesitating for only a moment, Miles took his phone out of his pocket and handed it to him. He watched as Barricade used the holoform to mess with his phone. He assumed he was just adding his contact information, but then back tracked to wonder how the Decepticon could even have something for Miles to contact him by. He shook his head to clear it of the thought, deciding it best to not think of and just accept it. He took his phone back and scrolled through the contacts, finally finding one that he was certain was Barricade. After all, _Officer Barry Cade _was kind of a dead giveaway. He changed the contact to _Officer Barry Ticon_, that way if for whatever reason Sam, Mikaela, or one of the Autobots got a hold of his phone they wouldn't be able to guess so easily who the contact was. At least that was what he hoped.

"Alright, goodbye then, Barry!" Miles smirked up at the 'con before beating a hasty retreat behind some bushes. He laughed when he heard Barricade growl in frustration, following the trail back to the road that would eventually lead him to his house.

* * *

The next day when the teen finally finished school and wandered down to the forest, Barricade was already in his bipedal mode and seemed to be working on his legs. Miles moved forward for a closer look, the mech hardly glancing at him at all. He climbed up on to the opposite leg so he could peer at the inside of Barricade's leg better, recognizing similar looking wires and metallic joints to what he had noticed in the mech's chasis. But this time the mech had something that looked eerily reminiscent to a saw out, his servos apparently able to transform into different things, and the teen couldn't help but wonder just where Barricade had been hiding a blade that big.

"What are you doing?" Miles asked after a moment.

"Some of the struts in my ped are broken, so I'm cutting through some wires to access a medical override panel there to turn off the sensors. My processor only allows me to do so for so long without it coming back anew to bother me," Barricade explained.

Miles pretended to understand what the Decepticon was talking about, just settling himself back down on Barricade's leg. That was when his cell phone rang loudly, the tune telling him automatically that it was his mother.

"Hey, Ma." Miles greeted as soon as he picked up, wondering if his mom could hear the buzzing of Barricade's saw in the background, and if she did what she'd assume it to be. "Mason? No, I don't know when I'll be back. Just drop him with Judy and I can get him from there if you'll be gone for the night. Yeah, love you too. I'll see you tomorrow then, bye."

The teen hung up his phone, glancing up to see red optics focused on him. They immediately returned to paying attention to the leg the 'con was working on, as if he could pretend he hadn't been caught watching. Miles did his best not to roll his eyes or snort and aggravate the mech further. He knew that the Decepticon had to be going through a rough patch. Essentially abandoned by his own faction, left beaten and bloody to lick his own wounds from the Autobots, and now he only had an organic for company. In part they were more ahead and more behind then the teen wanted; he realized that Barricade had issues showing any physical interest in him even when it was obvious there was a question he wanted to ask, and he had no problem answering any of the teen's queries.

It looked like he was going to have to train Barricade, push the mech into being more open, but what was the easiest way?

"Sorry about that," Miles decided to fake apologize. If he explained this way then the Decepticon didn't have to wonder, let alone ask. "My dad's got a surprise business dinner and they don't know how long they'll be gone, and since I wasn't sure how long I'll be here and since they think I'm at a friend's house, they're leaving our dog, a pet, with the Witwicky family until I can pick him up."

He got nothing more than a grunt for his efforts, but it was enough to satisfy him. Miles wouldn't lie to himself and say he didn't talk a lot, but he was talking more than normal with Barricade. He just hoped it was helping more than hindering, because telling the 'con about Mason had given him an idea, which meant more talking. He started to ramble on about maybe bringing the Mastiff to see the 'con. Then he informed Barricade about how well trained the canine was, and everything they'd gone through to train him and how effective it had been.

By the end of the night Miles would be pleased to see that the 'con had picked up on some of what he had said. He'd gotten asked to do things politely twice now, and had only been referred to as a stupid organic about ten more times. Of course he had to play it up a bit, because being nice and referring to him by his actual name sans any insult didn't mean that he was going to do whatever someone, or robot, asked of him, but for Barricade he did his best to be as cooperative as possible.


	4. Chapter 3

The next few days Barricade spent alone, watching movies and TV shows. He found he actually enjoyed some of them, despite his original hate of Earth and its inhabitants. For the first two days Miles had texted him a simple "Good morning, Barry", and after school had ended whether or not he would be able to join the Decepticon. He would also send him a "Good night, Barry" before going to bed.

He'd found out quickly that the teen was surprisingly easy to handle if he placated him just right. He was rue to admit that he'd gotten the idea from the teen himself, when he'd mentioned training some inferior organic species, but it came with good results. The teen was easier to handle if he used his name, insulted him less, and even if he growled less frequently. And if he was nice enough for an extended period of time then the teen didn't even tend to question him when he ordered him around.

By Thursday Barricade surprised Miles by texting him in the middle of school, causing his phone to go off loudly and get him detention that night. Once he had gotten home he had angrily texted Barricade and told him off as well as telling him appropriate times to text him if he wanted to text. The next day Miles turned his phone on silent, and just smirked when he checked his phone at lunch to see that the Decepticon had texted him again. He quickly texted the 'con with a smug reply, before putting his phone back into his pocket and acting like the good little student he was.

He brought his phone out again later on while waiting for his annoyingly late bus, texting the Decepticon to complain as well as just to talk. Slightly amused, as outside of the good morning's, goodnight's, and whether or not he could join the 'con Miles had avoided talking to him a lot through the phone. It seemed that Barricade getting him detention and texting him outside of their schedule had shown the teen that he could text the 'con more. Barricade texted the young fleshling back, occasionally poking fun at his slow typing skills. When Miles abruptly stopped texting he was annoyed at the teenager. When Miles didn't text him his normal "Good night, Barry" and then night turned to morning with no "Good morning, Barry", he couldn't help but wonder what was up.

He wasn't worried about the young teen, Primus forbid. He was merely curious as to what would cause the fleshling to change his normal routine so suddenly, or so he told himself. There was no way he was going to admit to enjoying being around a fleshling, or having any feelings remotely close to friendship towards the fleshy. If he was going to admit to anything that led to having feelings to Miles, it would be that the fleshy was like an entertaining pet he kept around, always returning to it's master without him having to call. Naturally he would wonder what was keeping his pet from him, he told himself.

Aggravated, Barricade wanted nothing more than to drive free of the little forest shelter he had surrounded himself in and find the fleshy and yell at him. He only managed to calm himself by thinking that Miles didn't have school on Saturdays, and while he did live close by, the bumbling Autobot was staying in Tranquility with Witwicky. When Miles appeared not even an hour later with a black and badly swollen eye he was surprised, and irritated.

"What did you do to yourself, fleshy?" Barricade questioned with a growl, driving the few feet closer to Miles.

Miles just grinned, "Oh, this? Tripped and fell on to a door knob, most embar-"

"Do not attempt to lie to me, fleshling!" Barricade snarled, effectively cutting Miles off as he transformed to glare down at the teen.

"No lies?" Miles asked, sighing and running a hand through his blonde hair. "Okay, the resident school cool guy asshole, Trent, was sitting near me at bus dismissal. He never liked me or Sam, and liked Sam even less when Sam 'stole' Mikaela from him. So he sat there bad mouthing the both of them and I eventually got angry and yelled at him. He gave me a black eye and broke my phone. I kind of dread seeing Trent on Monday, but at least Sam won't be there. Oh, and after Tuesday we have the rest of the week off. Cool, right?"

Barricade barely listened after Miles said Sam wouldn't be there that Monday. That meant the Autobot wouldn't be there, and he grinned inwardly as he formulated a plan against Trent. He ignored Miles' rambling as the teen continued to ramble on, tuning him out as he hacked in to police records and the like to put his plan in motion. He wasn't surprised by the small surge of protectiveness he felt towards the young teen-when one made as odd and desperate of a connection as he was with the teen then it was only natural he wanted to protect it and give the teen reason to stick around.

* * *

By the time Monday morning rolled around Miles was reluctant to get out of bed, face still sore although the swelling had gone down, and he had the oddest feeling that something was going to happen that day. He couldn't tell if it was good or bad, but after almost missing his bus he was starting to dread that it was something bad. When lunch came around and nothing else had happened he stopped worrying, never seeing a familiar police cruiser pull into the parking lot. When the bell rang to go home he took his time, not wanting to run into Trent or one of his lackeys with his eye still so noticeable, knowing that while he might not get hit again it was likely that he'd get laughed at.

When he went outside he was met by a large crowd of very loud students. Some were laughing and pointing at something Miles couldn't see, and others were whispering amongst themselves. Miles shoved his way through, stopping as he saw Trent's precious blue truck being towed away and two police cars. Trent was yelling at one of the policemen, trying to explain that he didn't know how he had gotten all those tickets and other misdeeds that they were accusing him of.

Miles grinned, thinking that Trent deserved whatever had happened. The grin quickly faded as one of the police cars pulled up in front of him and popped open the passenger side door. Eyes narrowed, he watched as the person inside beckoned him to enter. He could easily recognize Barricade's holoform, though the eye color had changed to brown. He could also recognize the cruiser as Barricade's alt form, though the Decepticon had changed the slogan to "to punish and bring justice", thankfully. Miles could hear the large group of students go mostly silent, just knowing a good deal were already looking at him, so he quickly hurried into the passenger side and slammed the door.

"What did you do?" he hissed, taking off his backpack and putting it on the floor between his legs.

"You should really buckle up, it's the law." The holoform chuckled, though the voice seemed to come from all around Miles despite the way the holoform's mouth moved.

Miles glared at the dashboard, buckling up. He turned his gaze to the holoform, "Well?"

"I simply decided to punish the human designated as Trent. From what you told me he deserves it." Barricade replied, amusement evident in his voice as he pulled away from the crowd of high-schoolers and out of the school parking lot.

"I wondered why you seemed to ask so many questions about what Trent had done. I don't even want to know how you did it. More important than that, though, what if you had been caught?" Miles huffed, sinking into the passenger seat.

"You told me that Witwicky would not be there on Monday and that naturally led me to assume that the stupid Autobot wouldn't be sitting in the school parking lot due to that. Though, I do wonder how you knew he wouldn't be here today. I thought you two didn't talk that much anymore?" Barricade wasn't even bothering to open his holoform's mouth now, so Miles assumed the voice was coming from the radio.

While Miles was happy that the Decepticon felt more comfortable asking questions and taking a vested interest in his life, this wasn't exactly what he had expected from that. He couldn't be too angry about what happened to Trent, though. The jock really did deserve it.

"His mom called my mom and asked if I could bring any homework he might get for Monday early Friday morning…" Miles trailed off, gripping the edge of the seat as Barricade pulled a sharp u-turn. His stomach dropped as he realized they were taking the way to Sam's house. "I-I can just deliver the homework on my own time, Barricade! There's no need for you to take me there! What if they're already back?"

Barricade just smirked, "Come, fleshling, what's the fun of not taking a few risks? I scanned the area, it doesn't seem like the Autobot is there."

Miles cursed inwardly, taking a shaky breath to calm his sudden nerves. He liked the 'con and was more than willing to admit that, but the thought of Sam realizing he had befriended what he would see as an enemy made him nervous. He didn't even know if they could count as friends anymore with the way his fellow teenager had been acting, but he still felt as if he had crossed the line of loyalty. They had been friends since elementary school, and while they did have other friends they were closest to each other, or had been until late last school year. In a weird twist of fate he almost felt closer to Barricade now.

They pulled up to the Witwicky household all too soon for Miles liking, and he slowly dug Sam's homework out of his backpack, getting out of the police cruiser and making his way to the front door. He raised his hand to knock on the door, hesitating as he stole a glance back at Barricade. His holoform was sitting smugly in the front seat, a lazy smirk in place as he left one hand on the steering wheel. Miles had no problem thinking he was a smug bastard that needed a scare in the form of a certain yellow Autobot coming back, but the teen doubted if he could take that himself. He took a deep breath, knocking on the door. He was more than a little relieved when Judy Witwicky opened it.

"Oh, Miles! Thanks a lot for getting here with Sam's homework, he's not back just yet, but I'll make sure to tell him to thank you… Oh, who's that?" Judy smiled, waving at Barricade's holoform, before taking the homework from Miles.

For a brief moment, as the teen glanced back and saw Barricade give a polite wave back, he wondered just what Judy would think if he told her the truth. Then again, Judy was like a second mom. He wasn't sure if this would be enough to get officially disowned from the Witwicky family and he never wanted that to happen.

He put on a smile, "Oh, that's a friend of the family. He was nice enough to pick me up from school today. And thanks for watching Masey again, by the way."

"Oh? That's nice, and anytime, darling. What happened to his police car? It looks kind of damaged…" She leaned out the door a bit as she scrutinized the cruiser. "To punish and bring justice? Haven't seen that before."

"Just some punks hassling the local law enforcement. And that's… his personal touch, as a joke. Seeing how long before they make him change it." Miles explained hastily, a hand rubbing at the back of his neck. "I'm sorry, but I really have to go now. He's gotta get back, and I gotta go home."

"Of course, have a nice day, Miles." Judy smiled gently, shutting the door.

Miles practically ran back to the saleen police cruiser, opening the passenger door and closing it just as quickly, hearing Barricade laugh as he buckled up. He glared at the radio as Anxiety by Black Eyed Peas drifted into his ears.

_"___I don't fear none of my enemies, and I don't fear bullets from Uzi's.  
I've been dealing with something that's worse than these,  
that'll make you fall to your knees and that's the, the  
anxiety the sane and the insane's brought me to my knees.  
Lord, please, please, take away my anxiety.___"_

Miles glared at the radio, knowing the 'con was using it to taunt him. After a moment he let a smirk fall on to his face, "Taking a page out of Bumblebee's book? That's cute."

The radio abruptly cut off the music as Barricade snarled in reply. Miles dared a glance over, regretting what he said as his eyes came into contact with furious red ones. He tried not to gulp out of reflex, having realized the first day that the mech had major anger issues. He absentmindedly wondered just when Barricade had changed the color of his holoform's eyes, the dark red definitely more intimidating than brown, and he quickly looked forward again, and then right so he could stare out the window.

"…Where are we going?" Miles asked hesitantly.

"For a drive. I've been in the same place for how long now? I think I can enjoy some time out. Or do you have a problem with that as well?" Barricade growled, a warning there in his voice even if it was obvious he was practically daring Miles to say something, anything, holoform glaring at the teen again until Miles shook his head no.

Miles sighed, leaning back in the passenger seat. It felt surprisingly different from when he had first sat in it, as if it was changing to better adjust to his comfort level. With a start, he realized that it just might be. He tried not to grin to himself as he thought Barricade might actually care, despite how red-eyed and snarly he'd been moments ago.

* * *

The next day Trent was nowhere to be seen in the school, and Miles tried not to act as happy as he really felt about that. Just after lunch he stopped somewhere in a secluded hall and pulled out his phone to text Barricade and thank him, realizing he had forgotten to the day before. He jumped when he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder, shoving the phone away quickly and praying he hadn't gotten caught by a teacher. He turned around, surprised to see who was behind him.

"Geez man, way to give me a heart attack! I thought you were a teacher!" Miles scowled, Sam just grinning sheepishly at him in return. "What's up?"

"Wanna ride home with me today? Micky ain't here, and we could hang out my house. Go to the lookout beforehand and make fun of all the stupid couples, just like old times." Sam grinned, and then looked nervous while Miles just stared at him in shock. "Hey man, there's no need to look so shocked!"

Miles attempted to snap out of it, laughing awkwardly. "Yeah? Okay. So I'll… uh, see you then, I guess?"

Sam nodded, and they parted ways. Miles was surprised to find he felt more nervous than happy. He knew Sam's car was alive, just like Barricade was. He only started to panic as it got closer to the end of the day, and closer to when he'd go see Sam. How was he supposed to act? Should he treat Bumblebee like a regular car even when he knew he wasn't? He didn't want to possibly anger or offend the Autobot.

Worse yet, if Sam brought up Barricade, could he really lie to his friend? He wasn't sure if he could. He felt a surprising amount of loyalty to the wounded mech, but he'd only known him for so long. It was impossible to beat the family loyalty he felt for Sam, right then. If it came down to it, would Miles be able to defend Barricade by saying nothing at all? There was no guarantee that he really wouldn't hurt Sam, no matter how unlikely he thought it was.

* * *

The end of the day came quicker than Miles would have liked. He got his homework for the night, and then walked to the shiny yellow Camaro in the parking lot. Miles bothered to text Barricade as he went, seeing Sam leaning against the hood of his car. He warned him that they'd be heading up towards the lookout, unsure whether Bumblebee would be able to detect Bumblebee or not. Shoving his phone in his pocket, he put on a smile, praying he didn't look anywhere close to as nervous as he felt. He watched Sam get in the driver's side, tossing his backpack in the back.

Miles followed his example on the opposite side, glancing around Bumblebee's interior, looking at it for the first time despite having ridden in the Autobot several times before. The only thing he could see that made the Autobot stand out was the insignia on the steering wheel and he pretended not to notice, keeping his hands firmly in his lap. He stayed silent as Sam—no, Bumblebee, he realized when the wheel seemed to turn without any help from Sam—pulled out of the school parking lot. He could see that Sam was just pretending to drive, letting the Autobot actually take control. The two stayed silent for five awkward minutes, the teen unable to keep himself from thinking how obvious Bumblebee's sentience was now that he knew about it.

"Bumblebee," Miles suddenly said, watching in satisfaction as Sam jerked in surprise. If he had actually been driving they would have swerved into the opposite lane, so Miles was thankful the Autobot was actually in control.

"W-what?" Sam asked, laughing nervously and glancing in his direction.

Miles grinned, "Your car. Yellow with black, like a Bumblebee. It's the perfect nickname."

"Oh," Sam seemed to sigh in relief, "Yeah, me 'nd Kaela already beat you to the nickname, call 'im Bee. Sorry, buddy.

"Ah, well." Miles said happily, the two lapsing into silence once more.

They pulled up to the lookout, surprised to find no one else was there. Miles started to feel ten times more awkward, but didn't say anything. He stole a glance at Sam, taking a small amount of enjoyment to find that he looked slightly nervous.

"So, uh…" Sam started, seeming to lose the small determination that had started him talking halfway through. "Mikaela said that a cop car picked you up yesterday. What's up with that?"

Miles tried not to feel a bit bitter as he realized what Sam was getting at. He and Mikaela obviously remembered Barricade's alt mode, and even if the 'con had changed the slogan on his side he didn't look that different. It did make sense that Sam might be afraid that Barricade was trying to get Miles to get to Sam, but he wished it hadn't been the reason Sam thought to start talking to him again. It made Miles feel like being a little mean.

"Oh, Officer Ticon?" Miles asked, shrugging a bit as if it were nothing. "I met him a bit ago. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and he helped me out of a bad jam. Saved me from juvie."

Sam jerked up in his seat, sitting a little straighter. It was a little mean, but Miles was satisfied at the result it got him. Sam looked absolutely gob smacked, staring at his friend in evident horror and clearly wondering how he could have missed something so big in his friend's life.

"What?" Sam nearly yelled, "Why didn't you tell me? I could have helped!"

"When would I have, Sam? We haven't had a decent conversation since you ditched me at the lake party for Mikaela. I'm happy you get her; I mean you've been pining after her for years, but after that you just… drew away. I tried to hang out, you were always busy. I tried to text you or call you and you either couldn't talk, or never said much. I know something happened, Sam! And it's fine that you never told me, I can dig that, but you basically dropped contact with me. And you expect me to rely on you for help after all that?" Miles ground out, instantly regretting how harsh he sounded when he saw Sam flinch out of the corner of his eye.

He wanted to be a little mean, felt it was his right, but he never wanted to hurt Sam. He sighed heavily, getting out of Bumblebee and moving around to the front of the Autobot, leaning against the yellow hood. Sam instantly scrambled out after him, looking at him nervously. Miles glared pointedly forward, before sighing again and dropping his gaze to the ground. If anyone could pull off a kicked puppy look, Sam sure could. He made a mental note to ask him to teach him the look later, if they ever got over their awkwardness around each other.

"I'm not going to apologize for what I said because it's true, Sam. But I will apologize for being so harsh about it." Miles muttered softly, glancing inside of the now empty Camaro. He almost expected to see a holoform there.

Sam nodded, "Look man, I'm sorry. You're right about something happening… What the government said about Mission City was just a cover up. Me and 'Kaela where there, but I can't tell you exactly what happened. It could put you in danger, or something…"

"So was it humongous giant aliens?" Miles asked, nearly laughing at the look on Sam's face. "Nah, I bet it was Godzilla!"

"Haha, yeah…" Sam looked at the ground nervously, "I shouldn't have just dropped off contact with you like I did. I can't really go into details, but I've been busy and preoccupied, so we wouldn't have been able to hang much anyway. I almost wish you would have been there with me, I have missed you…"

Miles grinned, "Aww, sounds like we got ourselves a total bromance in the wings. Sure Mikaela won't get a bit jealous now that we've made up?"

Sam just laughed and shook his head. He had missed Miles a lot, that wasn't a lie. He had a way of putting a light spin on any serious situation and he could always make people laugh. He was amazed by how quickly his friend had melted the awkwardness between them, but was relieved by it as well. When Mikaela had told him about seeing Miles get into a cop car he had nearly thrown a fit in panic. He remembered all too well how threatening Barricade had been, and was scared that maybe the Decepticon was using his friend for something. But now he wasn't worried at all.

"So what happened that this cop had to bail you out of? You never did say." Sam asked, leaning against Bumblebee's hood with his hands in his pockets.

Miles suddenly looked nervous, "I…I'd really rather not say. It's kind of embarrassing how it happened."

Sam looked at his friend curiously, and then shrugged. "Alright, man."

Sam figured his friend had the right to keep a few secrets, especially with all that he was keeping from him. They spent the next few hours just talking, catching up with each other and joking around. Miles felt slightly bad for fooling his friend, but he figured that in this instance the truth would hurt more than the lie. They eventually got back inside Bumblebee, and drove back to Sam's house. Miles called his mother and left a message saying he was spending the night, as he and Sam could easily share clothes and he could just hitch a ride to school the next morning. He then texted Barricade and informed him of the same thing.


	5. Chapter 4

Everything went surprisingly well for a few weeks. Miles had his best friend back and he and Mikaela had even developed an awkard semi-friendship. Sam was to blame for most of the awkwardness between the two, though, because he had reminded Miles about the way that he had used to call Mikaela a jock concubine, right within ear shot of said teenage girl. As payback Miles had invited the two over to have a scary movie night, including the movie Christine. It was almost funny how easily Sam was scared by the movies, but watching him freak out over Christine gave Miles a kind of smug satisfaction. He'd also told his parents about Officer Ticon, and they'd even seen Barricade pick him up before, so there was one less excuse he had to come up with.

It helped even more that his relationship with Barricade had improved in leaps and bounds. The 'con hardly even tried to 'train' him anymore, something the teen appreciated a lot. Now Barricade was more comfortable with just having normal conversations, not needing the teen to necessarily start up with questions about a certain topic anymore.

The downside was that Barricade was getting more and more stir crazy. Miles couldn't really blame him, all the 'con had to do was drive around and browse the internet without Miles there. And as fun as the internet could be it didn't do much to provide in the way of intellectual conversation, something that he quickly leaned that the 'con craved. With Miles he had some company and somebody to talk too, although there had only been one talk that he could really call philosophical-something about sparks and souls and what happened to a mech, femme, or human when they died-but outside of that there wasn't much for them to deeply talk about. It wasn't like they could really relate, after all. Miles had never fought once in his life, physically anyway, much less killed anyone or been in a war. To Barricade his life span was like the blink of an eye, and when they were together, in those silent moments where neither had anything to say, he could feel his mortality crashing in on him and suffocating him. Miles had never seen himself as fragile before, but now it was like a little voice was in the back of his head, whispering of all the things that could kill him. He never mentioned anything about it, and neither did Barricade. He wondered if Sam felt the same way whenever he was with Bumblebee.

But despite that, they were getting closer and learning to understand each other better. They were friends, despite how different they were. Miles was open about his feelings to Barricade, often using them to tease and disturb the 'con if he could. He found it ridiculously funny that such an advanced being was afraid of having someone close to him, but he supposed after a war like theirs he might have been too. Whenever he got to thinking too much about all that the Cybertronian may have gone through he had to find a way to cheer himself up, because he didn't need told when some existence's just weren't as pleasing as others. In the beginning Miles had trouble telling one growl from the next, but now he could say almost for certain if one growl was pleased versus one just being content. He was also reading the expressions Barricade made a lot better. While his faceplates held similarities to a human's face, the way they made expressions wasn't exactly the same. Being huge and black and made out of metal just made it harder for him, but he was learning as fast as he could.

To the outside eye it might not seem like Miles and Barricade were that close. It often might seem like Miles was making the huge 'con angry, but in truth that was just how he acted. That wasn't to say Barricade didn't get angry at the teenager, but this anger was a new one for him. Before if he had been angry at an acquaintance—no one outside of his old team having gotten the honor of being called a friend—or if they had had a dispute they would have a fight. Whoever came out on top was the winner and that was that. He couldn't do that with Miles, at least not physically. Barricade was half afraid that if he breathed to hard on the young fleshling it could kill him. They did have the occasional verbal disagreement. This would usually come around when Miles thought Barricade had been needlessly reckless and could have been caught, and Barricade would fight back because he couldn't stand that a "pathetic fleshling" was worried about him. This would end with Miles walking off for the rest of the day, and then coming back the next like nothing had happened. That was just fine with Barricade. He was a fighter, not an overly emotional Cybertronian.

Miles fell into a relaxed state, not being nearly as nervous about Sam finding out about Barricade as before. In fact, at the very moment he was in the shut down drive in with Barricade, and texting Sam. Barricade himself was using a holoform, just in case anyone came, and was relaxed against the side of his alt form. Like usual he was wearing the police uniform, and he had a scowl on his face. Miles was sitting inside his alt form with the door open and his legs touching the ground, not bothering to actually get out.

"Let's go to Las Vegas," Barricade suggested.

"I know you've talked to my mom with that form, but I don't think she'd agree to let even a police officer whisk me away to Vegas for a weekend."

"And why not?" Barricade asked, and Miles rolled his eyes at the offended tone. "You're not even of legal age to gamble, let alone drink. What could even a normal human police officer get up to with you?"

"Not even going to get into this with you right now, it's too nice of a day."

"Lake Tahoe?"

"Barry!" Miles groaned, looking at the holoform to find it smirking at him. "You're an absolute riot."

"And you are very unadventurous," Barricade replied with a shrug.

"I don't think going to Lake Tahoe sounds like an adventure," Miles muttered. "Anyways, you sure do seem to be wanting to go a lot of places lately."

Barricade rolled his eyes, "Can you blame me? I think I've gone stir crazy. I didn't even know Cybertronians could go stir crazy. There's something messed up about your planet that's causing me to glitch."

"Admit it, you just want to go on a roadtrip because you can enjoy feeling me inside of you." Miles laughed.

There was a few beats of silence before Miles actually realized the double meaning of what he had said. He felt his cheeks heat with embarrassment while Barricade started to laugh, because to the 'con it would mean next to nothing except an understanding of why it was funny to the teen, and that only embarrassed him more.

"You stupid Cybertronians come with too many possible innuendos. It's not my fault!" he huffed, climbing out of Barricade.

"You just have extremely poor word choice, fleshling." Barricade chuckled.

Miles ignored him in favor of climbing up on Barricade's hood and relaxing against the windshield. He yawned, texting Sam again. When the question of what he was doing came up, he replied he was hanging out with Officer B at the old drive in. He didn't think anything about it, he had told Sam they were hanging out before and nothing ever came out of it.

He stretched out lazily, starting to nod off on top of Barricade. The hood was just warm enough from reflecting the sun to be comfortable, and he could feel the engine running. He closed his eyes, drifting into a state of semi-consciousness. He was still aware of where he was and who he was with, but most of the sounds around them were tuned out, and Miles just day dreamed. He was only brought back to reality when he heard Barricade use the English equivalent of a Cybertronian cussword.

"SLAG!" Barricade growled, causing Miles to flinch and open his eyes.

The next thing he knew he could feel the saleen police cruiser reverse quickly, causing him to slide off the hood and hit the ground hard. Winded, he stared up at the clear blue sky in confusion, hearing Barricade speed off and knowing without having to look that the mech was speeding off into the distance.

After a minute or two he sat back up, and after a couple of minutes he saw a shiny yellow Camaro pull in to the parking lot. Miles did his best not to glare, because that explained everything he needed to know about why Barricade had just ran away.

Sam pretended to drive over to him, rolling down the window. "Thought you said you were here with Officer B?"

"He got called in for something or another," Miles replied with his best fake smile, "What are you doing here?"

Sam grinned right back, obviously missing how forced the smile was. His friend got out of the car and helped Miles up. The teen took a moment to brush himself off.

"Thought I'd come kidnap you. The last thing I need is you to become a hard ass from hanging around a cop too much. …And there's a new movie I really want to see but 'Kaela refuses to go with me. Since you were on the way I figured I'd stop by and invite the both of you, but since Officer Ticon isn't here it can be just you and me."

Miles opened his mouth to say something, but stopped when he heard Sam's phone go off. He laughed when Sam looked embarrassed, gesturing for him to answer it. He watched Sam walk off as he did so, starting to walk towards Bumblebee. He nearly tripped when he heard Sam raise his voice and the word Decepticon come out of his mouth. He nearly froze, glancing at Sam nervously then letting his gaze fall on Bumblebee. He had no idea that a Cybertronian could talk on the phone, but from what he could hear of the conversation he had to assume it was the Autobot.

He pulled out his own phone, quickly texting Barricade and telling him to lie low. He waited next to the Camaro until Sam came back over to him.

"On second thought, can we go to my house? Just have a guys night? A friend of the family wants to borrow my car for a hot date of his tonight." Sam explained, trying to sound sincere even though Miles could see it as a lie.

He just nodded, smiling. "Of course! Wouldn't want to cramp his style."

* * *

The next morning Miles was the first to wake up. He had spent the night at Sam's, sleeping next to his friend's bed on the floor. He stood up, looking to Sam to make sure he was asleep. Being as silent as possible Miles dug Sam's phone out from it's hiding place in a drawer, and looked through the texts. He felt bad for ignoring his friend's privacy, but if there was anything he could tell Barricade then he had to do it.

It wasn't hard to figure out that BB was Bumblebee. He guessed that The Hatchet was Ratchet and that Harda$$ was Ironhide from the way he kept talking about weapons. OP probably stood for Optimus Prime. Those were the first contacts to appear, the people Sam had been talking to last night. Thinking for a moment, he chose to read the conversation between Bumblebee and Sam. After doing that he was fairly sure he had everything he wanted to know, so he carefully put the phone back in it's hiding spot, and texted Barricade.

Extra Autobots would be coming into town to do an extensive search three days from now. He didn't know what one's, and just texted Barricade the information he could find out. He sat back down on the floor until Sam woke up, and the two made plans to see the movie Sam had wanted to see the day before.

* * *

The next evening Miles let Sam come pick him up with Bumblebee, reluctantly leaving his phone at home to charge because he had accidentally let it go dead. It wasn't like he planned on texting during the movie, but he knew if Barricade needed him for whatever reason that the 'con would have absolutely no way to reach him, nor did he even know where Miles was going to be. The teen shook the guilty feeling off, figuring he was just worrying too much about Barricade being found out. It wasn't like he could do anything to help the 'con if Autobots came in, anyway.

Miles let himself enjoy the movie, but half way through Sam disappeared into the bathroom. After a few minutes he became worried for his friend, wondering if he was suffering from something. Being the good friend that he was he went to check on his friend, but when he got to the bathroom doorway he froze, Sam's voice floating out towards him. He listened in, guessing that when Sam paused the other person on the end of the line was talking.

"What do you mean they're really coming tonight? You told me they'd be coming in three days, and that still leaves two days! ….Why would they hack into my phone company just to see my texting? …. Well, okay, it is kind of obvious that you're with me… Ugh, fine. Now I have to text mom to hide Mojo in the house in case Ironhide stops by. The last thing I need is him trying to 'exterminate' Mojo again. Bye, Bee." Sam finished, hanging up the phone.

Miles reached into his pocket to grab his phone and warn the Decepticon, then cursed when he realized it was at home. He shoved the bathroom door open, heading inside quickly as he thought of a good excuse to give to Sam to get them out of there quickly and give him a way to get to Barricade.

Sam looked at him questioningly, and Miles took a deep breath. "I forgot that my mom wanted me to pick something up for her, and I left my phone at home so she's going to expect me to have it. The store is going to be closing early, so we need to go. She'll have my ass on a silver platter if we don't!"

Sam just nodded, a bit worried about how freaked out Miles seemed. When Miles practically shoved him out of the movie theater and towards Bumblebee, he got even more worried. He knew his mom almost as well as he knew his own, and while she could be strict, he didn't see why Miles was freaking out this badly. Getting in and pretending to start Bumblebee, he went to where Miles told him. He was more than surprised to find that Miles was so anxious to get to a flower shop, and voiced his surprise out loud.

"A flower shop?" he asked incredulously.

Miles practically bolted out of the Camaro and ran into the store, not bothering with an explanation. He only paused long enough to actually buy a bouquet of roses, and then ran out the back door. The flower shop was one of the closest stores to where he usually met Barricade, and he silently prayed that the 'con hadn't left for a drive.

Alternating between a sprint and fast walking, he got there in about 15 minutes. Thanking the small dose of adrenaline running through his veins for that, he made his way over to Barricade. The 'con appeared to be in recharge, so Miles tapped on his hood impatiently, holding the bouquet of roses close to his chest.

Startled, the Decepticon snapped out of his light recharge. He silently took in a red in the face Miles, clutching roses to his chest.

"I'm flattered, really, but roses just aren't my thing." Barricade drawled.

Miles scowled, "Haha, you're so freakin' funny, Barry. I came to tell you that the Autobots are coming tonight. Apparently they were paranoid about someone hacking into Sam's phone company and reading his texts so they lied."

"Oh that's just wonderful." Barricade growled, doing a quick scan accordingly. "According to my scans there's one heading right for us."

"Yeah, that's probably Sam and Bumblebee. I was hanging with him at the movies and one thing led to another and bam, I'm here. With flowers. I mean, I know Tranquility's a small town, but there really should be more than one flower shop..." He trailed off as he watched Barricade transform into his bipedal form, awed into silence by the transformation he'd already seen before.

"No, it's the trigger happy one."

The next thing Miles knew he was being picked up, something that he had gradually been adjusting to. He was then promptly shoved into one of the nearest trees, the 'con hardly pausing long enough to make sure the teen was balanced enough in a branch to not fall out immediately.

"Hey! Put me back down!" Miles yelled, getting angrier as Barricade ignored him and walked away. "Get back here and get me out, you stupid over-sized bear!"

Miles fumed as Barricade disappeared completely from view. He started to look for the best route down, and saw a black GMC topkick go flying past. He muttered to himself angrily, having to take his time to get out of the tree so he wouldn't hurt himself. By the time he reached a branch he could jump off of he saw Bumblebee pull up and Sam get out.

"Miles, how the hell did you get up there?" Sam asked, staring up at his friend as he quickly got out of Bumblebee.

Sam knew that he might not be the brightest of the bunch, but even he had realized that Miles had run out of the flower shop the back way after a few minutes. Bumblebee had been following the general direction that he'd went in when Ironhide had commed the Scout to tell him about some organic that had been near to where the Weapons Specialist had first located Barricade, and the description had fit Miles perfectly.

It made him and Bumblebee question whether or not Miles really did know Barricade, but Sam realized he needed to focus more on his friend at the moment then any possibilities of his friend knowing about the Cybertronians.

"Attempting to call upon my chimpanzee ancestors!" Miles sarcastically replied, putting the bouquet of roses in his mouth and swinging down onto Bumblebee's hood.

"Dude, you need to tell me what's going on." Sam said, staring at his friend as he slid off Bumblebee's hood. "Do you know about what's going down near here?"

Miles took off running, "There's no time!"

He disappeared behind some trees before Sam could get anything else out, and he cursed his friend for taking Mason out running so often. Sam got back into Bumblebee quickly, the Autobot racing after Miles. He grew frustrated when they couldn't get to his best friend quickly because of trees and bushes that were in the way. At this rate Miles would end up where Barricade and Ironhide were. He could get seriously hurt, and that was the last thing Sam wanted.

Bumblebee came to a stop when he reached the area where Barricade and Ironhide were fighting, quickly transforming and picking Sam up. He held his tiny charge to his chest protectively, ready for anything to happen. He watched the battle between his fellow Autobot and the Decepticon closely, surprised to see that the 'con was mainly defending himself and trying to disable Ironhide but not out right harm him. Ironhide didn't seem to notice, or didn't care.

His optics were drawn away from the battle only when he heard Sam cry out Miles' name. He looked and saw the young teenager to be closer to the battle than he should be, and Sam was frantically trying to get his friends attention and call him away from the spot he was in. He noticed Barricade look at Miles in shock, only to be knocked on his aft the next instant by Ironhide. Ironhide shoved his cannon in the 'cons face, ready to blow him to pieces. But the next moment surprised everyone.

"HEY YOU BIG STUPID AUTOBOT! TAKE THIS!" Miles yelled, tossing the bouquet of roses at Ironhide as hard as he could.

Ironhide turned to look at what had made the noise, only to be hit in the face by the bouquet of roses. Of course this didn't do any damage whatsoever to the large, war-hardened Autobot, but it shocked him into freezing. In fact, everyone froze. Bumblebee and Sam looked at Miles with a mixture of horror, amusement, and awe. Barricade would have looked at him if he could have trusted Ironhide enough to take an optic off of him.

Ironhide turned his cannon on Miles, causing the young teenager to squeak and raise his hands as if to defend himself. "No, I don't feel lucky!" He exclaimed, looking ready to back down, but then thinking better of it.

He walked closer to Ironhide and Barricade, coming to a stop directly next to the Decepticon. He laid a hand on Barricade's ped, mustering up any bravery within him and looking at the large Autobot in front of him. He could hear Sam in the background, yelling at him to get away from the two mechs, but he ignored his friend in favor of glaring up at the Autobot.

"You!" Miles accused, gesturing wildly at Ironhide. "Where do you get off attacking someone who hasn't even done anything to deserve it? Has he done anything to any of you since before Mission City?"

Ironhide growled, "No, bu-"

"No buts!" Miles quickly interrupted him, raising his voice. He could almost feel everyone's eyes on him as he tried to stand his ground. "Barricade was loyal to Megatron, but now Megatron is dead! He hates Starscream, and refuses to be under his command. He hasn't done a single thing to make you guys come after him!"

Sam spoke up from his spot in Bumblebee's hand, staring at his friend with a weird expression on his face. "Miles, you don't get it, Barricade is dangerous!"

"No, you don't get it, Sam!" Miles snapped, turning his glare on the other teen now. "Bumblebee and Ironhide are just as dangerous as Barricade, and you don't have a problem with them. I know he threatened you for those glasses, but he never actually hurt you."

"So what are you saying?" Ironhide asked, sneering. "The little 'con wants to play friendly with us? Wants to be an Autobot?"

Miles huffed, looking around for who would be the easiest to talk to. His eyes landed on Bumblebee, "I doubt he wants to be an Autobot, ever. But he could be a neutral, right?"

"Well... he could provide us with some information about the Decepticons that we don't know, in return for us giving him a place to stay, energon, and possible protection as a neutral." Bumblebee offered, his voice rough and broken, sound staticky compared to his fellow Cybertronians. "I can comm Optimus and see what he says."

"You have got to be kidding me," Ironhide growled.

"Ironhide, you know as well as I do that Megatron is dead and the war has no reason left to be fought." Bumblebee turned a hard look on the Weapons Specialist, "It is up to our Prime, but I declare Barricade protected under the Treaty of Iacon until we can decide what we want to do with him."

Ironhide seemed a bit cowled by the Scout's strong response, and even Sam seemed to be relaxing a little bit with his Guardian taking charge, but Barricade was getting angrier.

"I believe I should get a say in this," Barricade growled.

"No," Miles replied, recognizing the anger in his tone and knowing that if he raised his own voice it would set the 'con off that much quicker. "Your way of laying low obviously failed, and you said yourself that Starscream would try to kill you again if any other Decepticons know where you are. This is the best option."

Barricade glared at Miles, slowly getting to his feet as Ironhide backed away from him. Miles watched the 'con expectantly, so he was surprised when Ironhide suddenly grabbed him from behind, apparently not thinking that Barricade was safe for him to be around even now. He was shoved in Bumblebee's direction, and the Scout just took him without a word, maneuvering him into the same servo as Sam. Miles glared at Ironhide.

"Optimus says we can lead Barricade to the base and see what we can work out. He wants Miles to come since Miles is, uh…" Bumblebee trailed off, looking down at the teen in uncertainty.

"We're friends," Miles offered. "I've been helping him all on my own, not been forced or nothing."

"Right," Bumblebee nodded his helm as if he understood, though his voice sounded like he couldn't believe it. "Since you're friends with Barricade our leader wants you to visit base as well. Sam will be coming along with us."

He set the two teens down, transforming into his Camaro form. Ironhide and Barricade transformed as well, the three Cybertronians lining up. Bumblebee in front, Barricade in the middle, and Ironhide bringing up the rear. Sam and Miles got into Bumblebee, Sam no longer even bothering to pretend to drive the Autobot. Both Barricade and Ironhide activated their holoforms to give the appearance of being non-sentient when Bumblebee reminded them.

They started to drive out of the forest quickly, and Miles sighed, leaning back in Bumblebee's passenger seat.

"I'm kinda happy this happened," he admitted, glancing over at Sam. "It was kind of hard hiding that I knew from you, and freaking you out making you think I had guessed or noticed something strange at the same time."

"Wait, that was why you had us watch Christine! I couldn't get in Bumblee for a week without flinching because of you!" Sam exclaimed, glaring as Miles laughed. "Wait, that's not important, tell me how you and Barricade met!"

Miles rolled his eyes, telling Sam everything that had happened since finding Barricade. He included Bumblebee into the conversation since he didn't really have a choice as they were inside the Autobot, skimming over unimportant details like what they'd talked about and how much time they'd spent together. After he had finished all three were silent.

It was true that he was kind of happy that they had been found out, especially since it seemed that they were able to get an audience with Optimus without having Barricade getting hurt in the process. But he couldn't help but worry over what would happen. He didn't fool himself into thinking that any of the Autobots would just trust the Decepticon, or that the Decepticon would be welcome. He just hoped that Barricade would behave long enough to at least not get hurt.


	6. Chapter 5

**AN: **Whew, I'm happy to see some people as excited about this remix as I am! Thanks for the lovely and encouraging reviews! And btw, does anyone have a tumblr? I need more people to follow! (plus if I really get down in a writing funk again I can be yelled at on there too lol)

* * *

"So… You threw roses at him?" Optimus asked, face mask down to hide the amused expression on his faceplates as he stared down at the teen on his desk. "What exactly were you hoping to achieve, young Miles?"

Miles sighed, glancing around the room. They were in what apparently was the Prime's office, a room that was as big as the Prime himself was with furniture to match. Miles sat on the edge of the Prime's desk, legs dangling off and barely having to look up with the mech sitting in front of him.

They'd arrived on base less than fifteen minutes ago, and he'd quickly been abandoned. Well, abandoned was a strong term. Barricade had been walked to something called a med-bay by Ironhide, Bumblebee explaining that his weapons would be taken away and that Ratchet, the Chief Medical Officer, would help the 'con with any wounds he had. Sam had then gone with Bumblebee so he could call his and Miles' parents, and explain that neither of them would be returning that night.

He didn't understand why he had to debrief the Prime, much less on his own. They'd been introduced by Bumblebee and then left, leaving Miles to give the Autobot leader the rundown of everything that had happened.

Glancing back up at Optimus, he shrugged. "I dunno, I guess I just wanted to distract him. It worked. On all of them, actually."

"Your race has always amazed me by how…" the Prime hesitated for a moment, glancing away as he searched for the right word. "_Brave_ you can be despite your tiny size and short life span."

"I wouldn't really call it bravery," Miles replied, "More like stupidity. I don't think anyone's brave enough to think that tiny little teenage me with no weapons going up against giant Ironhide is going to work! But shocking people has always been something I've specialized in, and I didn't want him to hurt Barry."

Optimus allowed himself to chuckle, just a little bit. The mask that he used to cover his face slid up, and the teen appreciated the Prime showing him a small and amused smile. He watched as Miles stood up, the teen running a hand through his hair in what he assumed to be a nervous gesture.

"Look, I know and you know that Barry's not going to be trusted just because a human vouches for him. I'm just going to assume that he's probably not even exactly welcome, except maybe to be grilled by Ironhide to see if he made me crazy. Both sides have done damage to the other side. I'm going to guess that every Autobot here has done some sort of damage to a Decepticon, and Barricade has done his own fair share of damage to Autobots, I'm sure. I'm not going to ask you to trust him, or even be welcoming towards him. Just…"

"Put up with him?" Optimus offered, more than surprised that the human geniunely seemed to care for the Decepticon.

Miles nodded, "Yes. Put up with him. Barry's stubborn so I don't know if he'll even accept staying here, and if he does I don't know if he'll offer anything in return. We have talked before about him becoming a Neutral. I know it's not polite to ask for something when the other may get nothing in return, but…"

Optimus carefully picked Miles up, bringing him closer to his face. "You care for Barricade."

It was more of a statement then a question, but the teen knew well enough to answer. "Yeah, he grows on you, I guess. I know he can be a bit intimidating, but he's never actually done anything to me personally."

The Prime cycled air through his vents, the Cybertronian equivalent of a sigh. He stayed quiet for a moment as he studied Miles. After spending so many days with Barricade he was used to being scrutinized, but not usually so blatantly. He didn't know what the Prime was searching for, what his appearance or actions told him, but he hoped it was something good.

Optimus wasn't sure what he saw in Miles at the moment; the scan he'd taken of the organic when he'd first entered the room had revealed hormones that would have suggested heightened stress and nervousness, and the Prime knew he must still be feeling the same way, but he hid it well behind light-hearted jokes and a grin. He had no idea how Barricade and Miles had managed to become friends, even after Miles' explanation of how they met.

But he could see a world of possibilities in what the teen offered, and while it was a bit difficult to work out just how truthful the offer was, it was very tempting. There weren't that many mechs on the base the humans had provided for them yet. It wouldn't be that hard to get the Autobots to accept the Decepticon into their midst, especially if Miles helped to encourage Barricade with whatever strange friendship they'd developed. This could be an official end to the war, the two sides joining back together to try and forge a strong and hopeful future even without the Allspark to help guide them.

"If Barricade does become a Neutral then he will be welcome at the Autobot base," Optimus said after a minute of examining the teen, "His weapons will remain with us, however, until further notice."

"I'll just get him a bunch of flowers to throw, that works pretty well in surprising you Autobots. May I suggest that you have someone do that in a training session? Gotta be prepared for anything in the heat of battle," Miles joked, but the Prime could hear the relief in his voice.

It said something a bit more that the teen was actually worried about the Decepticon, and wanted him to be safe. Bumblebee and Ironhide both had sent him a databurst of what fight there had been, and it was very obvious that Barricade had been distracted as soon as the teen had made his way in to the center of the battle, which meant that the 'con had to feel something for Miles as well.

"I'll talk to Ironhide about it. I'm sure he'll appreciate your suggestion, having been taken out by those deadly plants himself." Optimus replied, smirking openly and putting on a jokingly serious tone. He offered the teen his servo to climb into, moving it closer to the floor to ease his way down. "If worse comes to worse I will ask you to act as a liaison between Barricade and ourselves."

"Designate me as Flower Power and I'm your guy, big man!" Miles laughed, ignoring the serious tone in favor of climbing out of the Prime's servo when Optimus lowered it close to the floor.

He quickly made his way out of Optimus' office through the human sized door, nearly running right into Sam. Sam stared at him in shock, and Miles looked to the left to see that Bumblebee was standing near his friend in his bipedal mode, looking slightly guilty. He realized they both had been listening, and Sam grinned at him.

"Soooo, Flower Power and Bear, huh? Best dynamic duo I've heard of yet. 'Kaela will love it. Flower Power definitely suits you, you look like a frikkin' hippie, dude." Sam smirked at him.

Miles huffed, "Leave my hair out of this, Witwacky!"

"Original, Flower Power, very original!"

The two playfully threw insults at each other back and forth as Bumblebee picked them up and put them on his shoulders. The young Autobot carried them to the hangar that Barricade was currently staying in. It was a sparse thing, one of the tiniest buildings on the base, and it was being used as storage. When they entered Miles saw the 'con in his alt mode, parked in front of stacks of boxes.

Barricade growled, rolling forward. "Leave me and Miles alone for a moment."

Despite the slightly nervous look that Miles had, Bumblebee set the young human down. He left the hangar with Sam quickly, stationing himself and his charge far enough away that Sam couldn't hear that easily, but Bumblebee could still hear perfectly.

* * *

Sam looked at his watch, then at Bumblebee with wide eyes. "It's been an hour and they're still fighting?"

He had moved closer despite Bumblebee's protests. He was close enough that he could just make out the yelling that had been happening almost nonstop. There'd been a twenty minute period where not even his Guardian had been able to hear anything, but then the yelling had picked up again.

Sam knew that he didn't actually know the 'con, and that because of Barricade's initial actions towards him in the search for Archibald's glasses he had a large amount of dislike and small amount of fear for the mech. He was willing to push some of that aside if Miles was vouching for him, because he trusted his friend unquestioningly. But he wasn't sure if he'd ever be actually trying to make friends with the Decepticon if he was actually getting Miles to yell like that.

Bumblebee was about to reply when they were startled by Miles suddenly appearing through the door for the humans, slamming it shut behind him. He stormed over to the yellow Autobot and the human, hands clenched into fists. Sam went to say something, but Miles held up a finger, and the teen shut his mouth quickly. All three were silent as Miles calmed himself down.

Miles finally broke the silence, "You contacted my parents, didn't you, Sam?"

"Course," Sam replied. "Told mine that you know what's up now, so I think mom's formulating a good cover story we can give your parents. Military might still end up talking to them, though."

"Optimus and I can take care of what the military tells your parents. I'll drop you and Sam off at the human sleep station." Bumblebee informed them, picking up the still irate human and his Charge. "Most of the NEST members are on vacation, or are in the rec-room. I have comm'd Ironhide and he has said that Captain Lennox and Sergeant Epps will be there to get to see you."

Miles just nodded. Sam looked hard at his friend until he finally mouthed 'later' at him. Bumblebee carried them all the way to where the human barracks were, setting the two down in front of the door. Sam led Miles inside, where they could immediately see two military men, who Miles naturally assumed to be Captain Lennox and Sergeant Epps. The black man in military scrubs walked over to Miles with a shit eating grin on his face, hugging him tightly. He shot Sam a briefly panicked look, unsure whether he should return the hug or just pat the older man on the back.

"I barely know you," the man said into his shoulder, "And I already love you. You are so unbelievably amazing for taking 'Hide down with flowers!"

"All I did was distract him," Miles laughed awkwardly, "I didn't take him down, not technically."

"If it had been a real battle that distraction could have gotten him killed, so you technically took him down," the other military man replied, moving forward and grabbing the black man by the back of his shirt and pulling him away. He grinned, "At least according to Ironhide, anyway, so he's pretty pissed off. I'm Captain William Lennox, but you can call me Will. This is Sergeant Robert Epps."

"I prefer Epps, though." Epps said, the wide grin still in place.

Miles shook both of their hands, "I'm Miles Lancaster, but I'd prefer just Miles. If it makes Ironhide feel any better you could tell him that I'm pretty sure if he flicked me hard enough I'd be a goner."

"It won't, but I will suggest not going too close to him for another hour or two." Will chuckled.

The Captain started to walk down the hall, the Sergeant moving to walk next to him and the teens falling into step behind him automatically. Sam mentioned something about Ratchet hurting Ironhide, and the two military men laughed, leaving Miles feeling a bit out of place. But then they stopped in front of a door that was opened to reveal two beds, two dressers, and two closets.

"This is where you two will be staying," Will said, and Miles and Sam looked at each other in surprise before grinning.

"Alright, guys night!" Miles yelled, pumping a fist in the air.

Sam laughed, playfully shoving his friend into the room. It quickly turned into a wrestling match, and Epps goaded Will into placing bets on the winner. Miles finally won after he attacked Sam's ticklish arm pits, leaving him begging for mercy underneath his friend. Will had to give Epps twenty dollars, cussing Sam out gently for his weakness.

"I would have thought you already had a room here," Miles said once Epps and Will had left them alone.

Sam shrugged, opening the closet on the side of the room he'd called dibs on to find military clothing, the same along with white socks and dark blue briefs appearing in the dresser. He wasn't too surprised that everything was the right size when he checked it.

"I've been here before, but they've been building it for awhile. These barracks are actually pretty knew," Sam told him, "Since it's only about an hour with Bee going fast it's never been that important to spend the night, though I knew I had a room being reserved for me. I think Mikky's who they were going to room me with, but you work just as well."

"How many Autobots are here, then?" Miles asked, moving over to Sam's side of the room and taking a few pairs of the pants, socks, shirts, and boxers and putting it in his own dresser. "Barry told me about Optimus, Ratchet, Ironhide, and Bee, but I know I saw someone else when Bee was taking us here."

"Sunstreaker and Sideswiper are here, too. They're twins, apparently." Sam grinned, "Really cool to hang out with, they come up with the best pranks. Sunny's a bit anal, though. No scratching his paint or telling him he looks bad or something."

Miles snorted, "A narcissistic robot from outer space?"

"Don't tell me you're surprised!" Sam flopped down onto his bed, leaning his back against the wall. "You must have noticed the holoforms. Even Barricade's looks unrealistically good, and outside of him all their vehicle forms look damn fine."

"Okay, I was starting to pick up on it." Miles admitted, thinking back to the holoforms that he'd seen Bumblebee and Ironhide make. "I was thinking it was more striving to be perfect than being narcissistic, but then again Barry is pretty full of himself."

"Speaking of Barricade, what exactly were you two fighting about?"

Miles groaned and rolled on to his stomach, burying his face in his pillow and holding his breath for a moment. Sam stared at him in surprise, feeling a bit bad for being angry now. Originally he'd been very angry that Miles hadn't thought to come talk to Sam when he had openly admitted to Barricade telling him everything, but he was starting to realize that while Miles' introduction to the Cybertronians had been entirely less life threatening than his own, it had still been stressful and trying. It was a different stress, a different hardship, then his own had been but he felt for his friend either way. Miles had just done what he had thought best initially, much like Sam had in Mission City.

"I basically took control of everything and didn't leave him any choices," Miles said after a moment, lifting his face from the pillow so he could be heard. "Well, none that didn't involve him directly being offlined because of it. He's angry because all the Autobots see me as his 'keeper', as he called it. I just want to help his stupid ass and make sure he doesn't get killed and he gets his panties all in a bunch because then the Autobots look to me. I mean, big surprise when he just automatically goes along with everything in the first place. Maybe if he'd actually objected and _meant_ it to begin with then that would have discredited me, but of course he just blames it all on me!"

"If it makes you feel any better, I don't think he's capable of doing anything without you right now."

Miles smiled bitterly, "Oh, I know. And that just makes me feel worse. Fucking asshole won't even be able to play nice without me there to act as a buffer and he chases me away. He'll expect me to just walk in and forgive him tomorrow."

Sam stared at his friend for a moment before standing up and clapping his hands together. He decided he didn't really like such an ugly expression on his friend's face, and that heavy talk could be put off for another day.

"Alright, we're gonna go have some fun! Will mentioned some downtime in the rec-room before he left, wanna go?"

Miles shrugged, "Might as well."

* * *

_"This_ is what you guys do for fun around here?" Miles asked in disbelief.

Sam looked at his best friend and then followed his line of sight down to the floor. He had to admit that Monopoly probably didn't seem all that cool when they were on a base with giant alien robots, but it was all they had. What with the construction and the barracks only recently being completed only a few soldiers had bothered to stay full time; those that did brought nothing more than board games because the Autobots had an awful knack for wanting to join in and use things. It had quickly gotten them banned from the rec-room after Optimus had accidentally broken one of the soldier's play station for a second time.

"What, you suck at Monopoly?" Epps asked teasingly.

"Not so bad that I can't beat you," Miles responded automatically as he sat down.

Epps smirked, "Wanna bet?"

Sam shared a look with the Captain, because they both knew that when Epps bet on something the man never lost. Miles would find that out quickly on his own, though.

* * *

The next morning rolled about without any problems, and Sam woke up earlier than Miles. He got up and quickly changed, leaving their shared room as quickly as possible. Sideswipe stopped him on his way to breakfast, and after an interesting conversation with the Frontliner he went and got his food. Bumblebee's holoform joined him almost as soon as he sat down alone in the cafeteria, and Sam thought about asking the Scout how he always knew where he was, but he knew he probably wouldn't like the answer, so he didn't bother.

Sam then moved on to the rec-room, Glen and Maggie already inside of it and watching some early morning show. He joined them, sitting on an empty couch and putting his feet up on the coffee table as Bumblebee took the only armchair in the room. All four made idle conversation.

When Miles finally appeared in the human rec-room, Sam's mouth nearly hit the floor. He had been friends with Miles for practically forever, and he had always had about the same hair style. He often used to get teased about it in school, being called a hippie or a skater-wanna-be. But gone was the shoulder length hair that Sam had become so used to, the hair that had given Miles his peace loving vibe.

Epps and Will came in behind his friend, the Sergeant's face lit up with his normal grin. "Mr. Cocky here had to go and get his bet taken care of."

"But he's naked now!" Sam exclaimed, staring at his friend in open shock.

"Oh, shut up." Miles went and sat next to him, elbowing him hard as he did. "It's just hair."

"You've had the same haircut since kindergarten," Sam pointed out.

"And now he doesn't!" Epps sat on Sam's other side, chuckling. "Had good ol' Sarah chop it all off. Nearly cried when we asked her to give him a new look, she did. Woulda thought we were selling his soul to the devil with the way she talked about the next hair cut and the cut after that."

Will leaned over the back of the couch and smacked Epps over the head.

"Don't call my wife the devil if you want to live," Will said seriously, moving towards the other couch and snatching the remote from Glen.

"Think a change of pace was overdue, anyways." Miles said, "And I think she did a good job."

Epps whistled, "Boy's smart. Knows not to insult a woman in anyone's hearing, especially not her own, or around a lackey of hers."

"I prefer to sleep in the bed, not on the couch, thank you very much." Will glared at Epps.

Sam just shook his head, standing up and grabbing Miles and pulling him up as well. "C'mon, I have inside information on a prank that's been inspired by you and we need to get there quick or we'll miss out on the good seats."

Miles questioned him but Sam thought it best not to answer and instead lead him out of the rec-room and towards the exit. Almost immediately they heard a Cybertronian's footsteps and they moved to the edge of the hall to let the mech pass by them. But instead the Cybertronian yelled out at them, prompting them both to turn around. And before either of them could blink Miles was being picked up. The teen couldn't help but let out a disgruntled squawk of surprise as he was suddenly picked up by a large yellow mech that he had never seen before.

"Sunstreaker! What are you doing with Miles?" Sam asked, apparently just as baffled as his friend.

"He's the inspiration for our latest prank, so I'm taking him with me to the best seat for it." Sunstreaker explained, already striding down the hall and away from Sam. "You go between the Med-bay and the storage hangar for your seat!"

Miles tried to look at where they were going, but he eventually gave up when he remembered that he hadn't even had a tour of the base yet. While he'd been to the Prime's office he wasn't sure what building it was in, and Sarah had simply been stayin in the barracks with Will, so that hadn't shown him anything new at all. The most recent place he'd been to that was new was the cafeteria, Epps barely letting him grab something to eat before he was dragged to the rec-room to show off his new look.

After a few minutes they finally arrived at their intended destination, Sunstreaker entering a building. The mech went up a wide staircase, only slowing down when he made it out onto the roof of the building they'd just been in. He set Miles down, and he and the teen moved over to the edge.

Miles stayed silent, looking down at the ground over the edge. The building he was standing on was almost directly beside another, a narrow—for the Prime, anyway—alley between the two. He assumed that this building was for the storage one that Sunstreaker had mentioned, the insides seeming to agree with that, which meant the one next to it had to be the Med-bay. A bit away he could see a mech walking towards them, and his stomach dropped when he realized it was Ironhide.

He looked up to the opposite roof and noticed a red mech that he'd seen the night before, one he assumed to be Sunstreaker's twin. Next to the red mech were several large barrels, and Miles could guess that they were holding something that neither he or Ironhide would like in them.

"Ironhide," Miles called weakly. "Ironhide, stop!"

The teen was able to project his voice a bit better the second time, and the mech paused in his walking and looked up, but it was too late. Sideswipe quickly tilted the first barrel full of a clear liquid down onto Ironhide, and the strong scent of rose perfume drifted across the roof to him. That was followed by another clear liquid, then a few barrels of rose petals. There was so many that the Weapons Specialist was practically buried in them.

Once he did break free there was an unusual amount of the rose petals sticking to him, and the mech tried to swipe them off in annoyance only to realize they were glued on. The teen wondered what kind of glue was that fast acting, and beside him Sunstreaker started to cackle. Across from him Sideswipe began to do the same, and Ironhide's helm shot back up as he looked upwards at them.

Miles gulped at the rage he saw in the blue optics, and Sunstreaker and Sideswipe immediately stopped laughing. A yellow servo wrapped around him once more, Sunstreaker going back the way they'd come and running out of the building. Sam stood just outside of it, red in the face and nearly doubled over from how hard he was laughing. He was placed down next to his friend just as Ironhide let out what could only be described as a very pissed off bellow.

"Y-you m-might," Sam fought to breathe and stop from laughing, "You might want to go save your twin, Sunstreaker!"

Sunstreaker nodded, racing off to help his twin. Sam finished composing himself as the sound of cannon fire began in the distance, followed by tires squealing. He looked to Miles and smirked, noting that he looked a bit paler than usual.

"And you might want to hide from Ironhide." Sam said, trying not to laugh at his friend. "He'll blame you for giving them the idea."

* * *

Miles was able to hide from Ironhide until lunchtime. The two teens spent the time up until then introducing Miles to everyone; by the end of it he'd officially met Ratchet, Sideswipe, and several other soldiers. They were just going on a tour of the base with Bumblebee when Miles disappeared. One minute he was walking next to Sam, and the next he was gone. Sam looked around questioningly, and even Bumblebee was taken aback by the sudden disappearance until they noticed the rose petals on the ground and figured out what had happened.

After sharing a laugh, the Guardian and his Charge went and got an energon cube, taking it to the storage hangar that Barricade was staying in. When they entered the hangar Barricade was in his bipedal form and when he saw it was just them he looked behind them, then away when he realized no one else was coming in.

"Miles is off being tortured to death by Ironhide," Bumblebee told him, trying to be comforting.

Sam snorted, giving his Guardian a frown. "Even if Ironhide hadn't grabbed him he wouldn't have wanted to come. He's pretty pissed off."

Bumblebee vented softly at the teen, moving and setting the energon cube in front of the Decepticon. He was ignored completely, though. Red optics glared harshly at Sam, and the Scout wasn't too surprised by that. A glance back revealed that Sam didn't actually seem to care, glaring right back. He was quickly realizing that he might as well just leave the hangar for all the attention he was getting.

"You're assuming I care where he is, fleshling." Barricade growled. "And even if I did, I know he always comes back after a day or two."

"Not happening this time, 'con." Sam replied, just smiling. "Smart move upsetting the only person on your side. I'd suggest you get a few tips on relationship advice with humans before talking to him again."


	7. Chapter 6

Barricade was beyond annoyed. Two days passed before he was willing to accept that Bumblebee's organic may have known a bit more about the fleshling than he did. And it didn't help that the Scout was the one to always bring him energon, trying for a kind remark or simple conversation that may have worked if Sam wasn't always at his peds with a snide comment and a smirk because the other organic was never anywhere in sight. On the night of the second day he finally decided to wander out of the hangar that he'd been allotted. Outside of the first day when he'd been to the Med-bay and then talked to the Prime a couple of hours after that he'd not really left it. Bumblebee had brought him any food he needed, and it seemed everyone and mech else was content to leave him to his own devices.

He'd been sent a layout of the place via databurst, and as he left his hangar he decided to head for the rec-room. If he had been looking for Miles then it would have been the most likely place, but as he wasn't interested in finding said organic he was only going because it was likely to be where Bumblebee and hopefully friendly soldiers were.

Barricade turned the corner of the building that was the Autobot barracks, wondering how many recharge berths were inside it. He gave it a curious, sideways glance, almost not being quick enough to avoid being ran over when Sideswipe came slamming out of the doors, transforming down into his alt mode and racing away.

The 'con gave the Frontliner's disappearing form an annoyed glance, taking another step forward just for another figure to dart out and trip over his ped this time. He looked down in surprise at the organic now on his hands and knees on the ground and cussing up a storm. It took him a moment to recognize Miles. His hair had been trimmed, and in military scrubs he looked older than what he really was. The teen looked up with wide hazel eyes and Barricade scanned him out of reflex, floored by the fear his reading picked up.

"_I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!_"

Ironhide's angry bellow came out of the recharge hangar, and Miles paled noticeably. Barricade scanned again just as his hormones went wild and his adrenaline peaked, the teen scrambling up and sprinting off in a random direction. It was a little comforting to know that the teen wasn't suddenly afraid of him after their fight; he was just scared to death of the stupid Autobot Weapons Specialist. Ironhide charged out of the recharge hangar, nearly taking off the door entirely. Barricade took in his new pink look, roses taped all over him, and could understand Miles' fear a bit more now. He pointed in the direction that Sideswipe went when the mech looked at him expectantly.

He watched the Weapons Specialist transform into his alt mode and race in the direction he had gestured to, waiting until he disappeared from sight before he changed his course and went to the building where the Prime's office was located. With the plaques on the wall saying what room belonged to who it wouldn't have been hard to find it again even without his map to help. He knocked on the door before just entering the room, only willing to go so far with politeness.

Optimus didn't seem surprised at all to see him. The Prime looked up from the datapad he was reading and tilted his head in acknowledgment, Barricade doing the same. Sideswipe was also in the office, but he was up against the far wall, and he had a holoform peering out of one of the windows that looked fairly nervous.

"Decided what you wanted to do, then?" the Prime asked, setting the datapad to the side.

"Indeed. I'd keep my Decepticon status, but declare neutrality outside of that. I don't wish to join the Autobots, but I will swear on my spark that I will not harm one of them or the organics on base accordingly," Barricade told him simply, not interested in actually talking or debating about it.

"Decepticon Neutral, then?" Optimus offered. "Since your weapons have already been taken you don't pose any immediate threats to any of my mechs, as you well know. I don't think you'd bother to hurt an organic if you decided to betray us, but I think it best to warn you that death would be kinder than what some of my mechs will do to you in retaliation. Ironhide and Bumblebee especially are close to the organics, and will not take kindly to losing any of them or having any of them be hurt."

Barricade scoffed, "The organics are too weak to get any enjoyment out of harming one of them, anyway. There'd be no upside to doing something so stupid."

"Oh, still fighting with Miles?" Optimus asked, and Barricade shot the Prime a glare. "Samuel mentioned it. I think he's more upset at you over it then Miles is himself from what I can tell."

"I don't know, boss." Sideswipe turned from his spot at the window, "Some of the organics are very good at hiding how upset they can be. Remember Epps when Sunny pissed him off?"

"That's true," Optimus allowed. "I do believe Sunstreaker will never target Epps directly again, after that."

Barricade looked between the Prime and the Frontliner, slightly annoyed that they were trying to worm their way into his business. He prepared to just leave when Sideswipe put a servo over the door to stop him.

"Organics are pretty easy to please," Sideswipe smirked. "I can get Miles to stop being mad at you pretty easily, if you follow what I say."

"At what price?" Barricade asked, glaring at the servo in his way.

"Keep me hidden from Ironhide for awhile and the boy will be all yours again," Sideswipe promised.

Barricade looked at the Frontliner briefly, and then back to the Prime. Optimus just looked back, both of them waiting to see what the 'con would do. Barricade contemplated just shoving Sideswipe to the side and storming out, but then he thought about how much easier things would be if Miles was on his side again. For one he'd not have to deal with Sam's haughty attitude anymore and that was almost worth it alone, though having the teen to rely on offered him an escape out of his hangar without needing to worry about how others would react around him as much.

"Fine," he growled, "But if you get too annoying I'm handing you over on a silver platter."

* * *

Miles made his way to Barricade's hangar as stealthily as he could, hiding from the side of one building to the next to make sure Ironhide wasn't around. The twins had blamed the last prank entirely on him, and the Weapons Specialist had been looking for him since that morning. The teen was starting to wonder if the twins wanted him to die, for whatever odd reason. Maybe he'd accidentally offended them in some way and he was just absolutely clueless about it.

"Hey, Barry." Miles called as he slipped quickly into the interior of the hangar. "Bee mentioned that you wanted to see me. I know he said 8:30 and it's only six, but I was in the area and Hide's out for my ass. Need a place to lay..."

The teen trailed off as he took in the sight of the hangar. He looked around in mild surprise, noting that all the boxes had been pushed in to the back of the large room, and that candles were everywhere. They ranged from pink to red to white, only some of them lit, casting the room in a warm glow. In the middle of the room, near Barricade's alt mode, was a table with a white cloth on it. There were rose petals on the table and scattered all around the ground. Barricade's holoform appeared, arms crossing over his chest as he stared at Miles.

"Are you going to have a date with someone?" Miles asked in disbelief, looking around once more.

"Don't be stupid, this is for you."

"M-me?!" Miles sputtered, "You don't even like me saying that we're friends and you want to _date_?"

"Date?" Barricade echoed, "What makes you think that's what this is?"

Miles looked at the 'con in complete disbelief. If it hadn't been for the annoyance he could hear in Barricade's voice and the glower on his face, he might not have guessed that he really had no idea what he was doing. But it didn't fit at all. He knew the 'con did see him as a friend, or at least hoped so, but this was far above anything the mech had hinted at before. Not to mention the entire set up just wasn't Barry at all. Which probably meant that he'd gotten the idea from somewhere, or someone, else.

"Okay, okay." Miles gestured around the room, "Who got you to do this?"

"Sideswipe."

The teen was torn between laughing and groaning, a hand raising up to run through his hair automatically, before he realized it wouldn't work as well and just lowered it again instead.

"Sideswipe has led you down some dark path that we need to move away from immediately," Miles told him, "What exactly did he say to get you to do this?"

Barricade looked annoyed, "I was conversing with the Prime and he happened to be in the room when the subject of you being angry at me came up. He sent me a link to some website with ten tips to get your boyfriend to stop being angry at you; all the reviews claimed they worked."

"Oh, that fucking..." Miles grumbled, shaking his head in disdain. "Look, there are two different meanings for boyfriend, Barry. One is a boy that's a friend, and the other is a romantic interest. Same with girlfriend."

Barricade remained silent, and the teen could only assume that the 'con was doing some research on the internet by the way the holoform stilled completely. He went over to the table and sat down in one of the chairs, resting his elbow on it and placing his head in his palm while he waited.

"_This _is a romantic atmosphere to you humans?" Barricade asked finally, sounding disgusted.

"_This _is a supposedly advanced robotic being?" Miles taunted back, ignoring it when Barricade growled at him. "I mean, really? You've watched how many TV shows and movies by now and still haven't picked up on any of this yet?"

Barricade's holoform took the seat across from him, glowering. Miles just stayed silent, unsure how to feel. He was happy that the 'con had attempted to figure out how to please him, but he had failed quite spectacularly. Sideswipe was to blame for it, he knew that, but it made him feel slightly guilty. Had Barricade thought that perhaps he was just being abandoned by the only friend he had on base, and that's why he went overboard? The teen thought about telling Barricade he hadn't even been that angry, that he had just left him alone to see if the mech would go out and associate on his own. He had been disappointed for the most part until today, when Optimus had reported back to him with good news. But somehow he knew that if he told the 'con that it would just make him angrier.

"Never listen to Sideswipe or Sunstreaker." Miles finally said, "They just like messing with people in general, apparently, but I'm pretty sure they're out to get me killed by Ironhide, too."

"I would have thought that you'd be happy I was talking with and listening to an Autobot," Barricade grumbled, and Miles tried to hide a smile at how sulky the mech sounded.

The teen started to tell Barricade exactly why he should never ever listen to the twins again, ranting about all they'd done in the past three days to nearly get him killed. He'd never ran so much in his life, and while Sam said they just liked to haze the newbies a bit, Miles felt it had gone beyond that point by now. He thought that it might just be time for a little payback, and he quickly roped the 'con into helping him.

* * *

Between Barricade and Ironhide, Sunstreaker had been easy to track and hold down until they had finished adjusting his paint with something a little more permanent than the twins had been using on Ironhide.

Miles had been the mastermind behind that idea, because while Sunstreaker had been participating in some of the pranks with his twin he had largely stayed out of it. But the teen had picked up quickly that Sunstreaker was the boss, and if the boss suffered then his subordinate would, too. Ironhide had agreed, and they had released Sunstreaker out into the middle of the base where he had to run so he wouldn't be seen by anyone else, and from there hopefully he would find Sideswipe and make his own twin suffer accordingly.

And the payback had been unexpectedly useful because it had given Barricade and Ironhide the opportunity to talk with out it being about factions or any other heavy subjects. Miles wasn't sure that it was necessarily a good thing that they were now on talking terms because of the torture they'd enjoyed putting Sunstreaker through, but he wasn't going to complain.

It wasn't until after Ironhide had left them and that they were going to meet up with Bumblebee and Sam for dinner that Miles realized he could be a possible target of Barricade's, too.

_"___I'm not your boyfriend, baby!___  
___I ain't your cute little sex toy!___  
___I'm not your lion or your tiger,___  
___Won't be your nasty little boy!___"_

The song by 3oh!3 played loudly from Bumblebee's speakers as soon as Miles and Barricade walked into the Scout's line of sight. The teen had told Sam about the little incident, and it looked like Sam had told his Guardian. Miles didn't need to look up to know that red optics would be glaring down at him, and he cursed his friend for having such a big mouth.


	8. Chapter 7

After the weekend ended, Sam and Miles had to go back to Tranquility and return to their regular school schedule. Barricade was left behind at base, while Bumblebee escorted the teenagers home, even helping them with their homework when they took to complaining too much about it. During that time Miles continued to text Barricade, but it was the first weekend of October before they had a chance to go back. Despite knowing that Optimus had been joking about him being the liaison between them and Barricade, Miles was turning into just that fairly quickly. He'd gotten a number of texts from the Prime and Ratchet about the 'con. He'd likewise gotten quite a few texts from Barricade asking for suggestions on what to do or say about some things.

As soon as Bumblebee dropped them off on base he hightailed it to the Prime's office.

"Hey, big O, how'd Barry behave while we were gone?" Miles asked, just walking in the human sized door to his office.

He was surprised to see another mech there that he'd yet to meet. This one looked similar to Barricade in that it was obvious a cop car was his alt mode, although he was more white than black compared to the Decepticon Neutral. He also had blue optics, a slimmer frame, and doorwings much like Bumblebee's. Miles guessed he was probably taller, too.

"Oh, shit, sorry, I didn't interrupt anything, did I?"

"Not at all," Optimus replied with amusement. "Miles, this is my Second in Command, Prowl. He's the Tactician and one of the largest reasons I'm able to stay sane with everything that my mechs get up to. He was off in a few meetings in DC when you were here last, but he's already been briefed on you."

"Oh," Miles said, grinning at Prowl. "Nice to meet you."

"The feeling is mutual, Civilian Miles Lancaster." Prowl responded politely, before he turned back to his Prime. "I'll inform you more of the plans later, then."

Optimus nodded, and Miles remained silent while Prowl left the room. The SIC did seem very polite, but that was all he seemed. His voice was so monotone that the teen had been unable to pick up any emotions from him and his faceplates had been expressionless. He'd thought Barricade had been bad at first, but the 'con had nothing on this mech.

"He's a bit..." Miles said, trailing off on purpose once he thought Prowl was out of ear shot.

"Most of the humans think like that," Optimus responded. "He wants me to act more like him. Thinks it improper for a leader to show as much emotion as I do."

"Really?" Miles grimaced at the thought, "He just seemed really... robotic to me. Like you and the others I can get stuff from, relate to you, but he's on autopilot or something, man."

"I know," Optimus vented. "Ratchet and I were hoping that Earth might help him come out a bit more, but as of yet there has been no significant change. Perhaps you could work some magic on him, like you've done with Barricade."

Miles snorted, "Barry's got a stick up his ass, but that one's labeled anger. I can deal with that pretty easily. Ain't sure what Prowl's got up there."

"Fair enough, youngling." Optimus chuckled, "Now, to answer your question, I think Barricade has been doing fairly well. He's struck up a surprising friendship with Ironhide, and none of us know how that happened. We're thinking it had something to do with the twins not being seen since the day you and Barricade made up, though."

Miles grinned at Optimus' pointed stare, but the teen wasn't going to tell what had gone on between the three of them with Sunstreaker tied down. It wouldn't be until later, long after he'd finished his talk with the Prime and after he overheard Epps mentioning some mission, that he found out just what the plans Prowl had been talking about were. He was a bit more than surprised when he learned that the Autobots planned to bring back Jazz, who he loosely knew about and knew that the mech had been killed in battle.

According to Epps, they needed some Allspark shard to do it, and that location was top secret and very far away. Originally the government had the Allspark shard, and Prowl had been in DC recently to convince them to give it up to the Autobots nearby so that they could do what they needed to with it. After they got the shard, along with the Autobots who were with it, Jazz's body would be retrieved and he would be brought back with them so that Ratchet could go about getting the Saboteur up and moving once more.

After he found out about it he spent an hour convincing Optimus Prime to let him go on the mission. He'd had to rope Epps in with him, promising the Sergeant that he'd owe him one later, but even with the older man's help it still took the Prime awhile to agree. That was when they found out that the Autobots that had the shard had picked up Decepticon activity near them, and that was why the mission was suddenly being put into motion. There was no guarantee that they would see any Decepticons, though, and it was with that argument and Epps' promise to watch out for him that Optimus agreed to let Miles go.

He had many reasons for wanting to go. One of the biggest was that if he made himself irreplaceable then he made Barricade's place on base safer. But he couldn't lie to himself and say he also didn't want to go because it sounded like an adventure but a safe one. A controlled adventure that would give him a taste of the Autobots and the war they were still fighting. It would help him decide whether he wanted to continue on with them or Barricade or leave them all behind, because he had his mother and father to think after as well.

That evening they announced the NEST members and Autobots that would be going. Optimus read off the list, having gathered everyone into the rec-room.

"The Autobots going are Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, Ironhide, and Prowl." The Prime paused as these Autobots nodded, before continuing. "The humans that are going are Captain Will Lennox, Sergeant Robert Epps, Jorge "Fig" Figueroa, and civilian Miles Lancaster. They will be packing and leaving within the week."

Many people were shocked when they heard Miles' named called, but no one openly said anything about it. Optimus called the people and 'bots going on the mission out of the room for a briefing, leaving everyone else alone in the rec-room. Sam looked at Barricade questioningly, figuring that since he had no idea that Miles was going then 'Barry' would. Barricade just glared at him. When Miles came back to them Sam practically pounced on his friend.

"Why are you going?" he asked, pulling Miles down on to the couch and holding his arm in case he tried to run.

"I volunteered." Miles replied, grinning slightly. The grin quickly faded when both Sam and Barricade gave him a look. "Well, what exactly do I do around here besides take up space? You defeated Megatron with the Allspark so you're covered, you did your part. But me? Nothin'. I doubt I'll be able to do much on this mission, accept maybe carry the shard while the others are fighting if the 'cons do come. Most likely I won't even get to do that though, right?"

"You don't have to do anything for the fragging Autobots." Barricade said, letting his holoform appear on the arm rest of the couch so the two teens didn't have to crane their necks to be polite.

"I don't have to." Miles agreed, glaring at Barricade. "But I want to."

Barricade glared right back, "You are making a foolish decision and putting yourself in danger. I knew you were stupid, but I didn't think you were this stupid."

Sam quickly got up off the couch, high tailing it over to Epps, Will, and Bumblebee. It was obvious to the four of them, the only ones still in the rec-room outside of Barricade and Miles, that the two were going to start fighting over the subject and that they were best left alone at this point.

"Twenty dollars says Miles gets pissed and doesn't talk to Barricade until we get back with Jazz!" Epps exclaimed, looking at both Will and Sam expectantly.

Sam sighed, glancing back at his friend. "Miles gets pissed, but still talks to Barricade before you guys leave."

"Well…" Will trailed off, thinking. The Captain realized that the teen and his Sergeant had already taken the good options, which didn't leave him with much. "Miles puts Barricade in his place during this argument and Barricade eventually apologizes because he realizes he was wrong."

They turned to watch the two more closely. Miles had pulled a couch pillow into his lap to squeeze, and Barricade had stood up try to get his point across better.

"So you're ordering me to stay here?" Miles asked, sounding surprisingly calm despite glaring at Barricade.

Barricade growled, "If it gets you to actually not act like the stupid inferior being you are, then yes!"

"Shit," Will groaned immediately. "I'm out."

"Well," Miles began, standing and tossing the pillow he'd been holding directly in Barricade's face. "It's just too damn bad that I don't take orders from oversized children posing as advanced robotic beings!"

With that, Miles stormed out of the room. Barricade's holoform dissolved, and he quickly made himself scarce as well. Will left the room muttering about stupid bets and not having enough money to keep making them.

"It's only a matter of time, now." Epps said, smirking.

Sam nodded, saying a rushed goodbye as he chased after Miles, and Bumblebee followed to go after Barricade instead.

* * *

As it turned out Epps ended up winning the bet. Miles didn't say a single word or even go into the same room as Barricade in the five day's that the mission team remained on base, getting prepared. Of course, the teen was actually going through a lot more briefing then any of the other humans, and barely even had time for Sam.

He was taught by Ironhide about a wide array of known weapon types that could possibly be used against him and what would be the best protection if he had to try to run from a round aimed at him, or whether he should forgo running altogether and just pray instead. Epps took him through multiple what-if scenarios and what he should do in response to each and every one of them. Because of that and the fight, Miles only told Sam to say goodbye to the 'stupid ass' for him before they left, cementing Sam's loss and making Epps give a silent victory dance behind the blonde.

The group set off in the early morning. Each human paired off with an Autobot to act as their driver. Miles got Prowl, Fig got Sunstreaker, Epps got Sideswipe, and Will got Ironhide. Most of the humans' weapons were in the back of Ironhide, covered by a tarp and in several boxes. While the Autobots did have their comm links, they switched to radio use for the humans. That way they could talk to, and be heard by the other humans and Autobots.

"Okay, does everyone remember the plan?" Prowl asked, ignoring Miles as he groaned and slumped down in the driver's seat.

"Of course we know the plan," Epps responded in an annoyed tone. "You've only gone over it about five thousand times now. Leave Nevada, head for Pennsylvania. Retrieve the Allspark shard. On the way back stop in Oklahoma for Jazz's body and to get First Aid and Inferno. If we do happen to get attacked by any Decepticons we pray to whatever religion we believe in, add Primus in there to cover all the bases, and cover our asses while you guys take care of them. This is planned to only take four days; we will be sleeping inside of you to save time."

Prowl remained silent as Sideswipe, Miles, and Sunstreaker openly snorted at the tone that Epps took with him.

"Look, Prowl, we haven't even left base yet." Epps pointed out, "It's good that you're making sure that we understand what we need to, but you're working all angles here to death, man. It's not the first rodeo for any of us here, outside of Miles, and even _you_ were pleased with the preparation we put him through. You're giving me a migraine with all this work talk."

"If you get a migraine from simply going over the details of a plan perhaps this isn't the best line of work for you," Prowl replied simply.

"Oh you listen here you fucking-" Epps' voice was cut off, Sideswipe ending his side of the conversation so that the Sergeant couldn't pick a fight with the SIC.

Fig laughed, "Epps always has such bad language, even around Miles! My momma always used to say: las palabrotas llevan a un alma mala. ¡No hay neces-"

"English, Fig." Will cut in immediately.

Fig gave a deep sigh, and Miles openly grinned, knowing he wouldn't be seen in Prowl's interior. He hadn't spent much time around the southern man, but he'd already picked up on the fact that Will and Epps weren't too appreciative of his Spanish usage. That and he was called joven a lot for some reason.

"¿No aprecian los norteamericanos su español que habla herencia?" Sunstreaker asked innocently.

Fig laughed happily, "Estoy seguro que no es eso. ¡Will y Epps ambos tomaron algún español, yo acabo de adorar para molestarlos consigo porque ellos nunca lo podrían retener!"

Sunstreaker laughed, and Sideswipe rejoined the radio channel so that he could join in with his twin to talk to the soldier. Miles looked over to his left to see Will's face, then in the rear-view mirror so that he could catch Epps'. Both men looked like they were becoming gradually more and more horrified as they realized that now Fig would have people to talk to who enjoyed using Spanish to annoy others almost as much as he did. Epps banged his head off the steering wheel while Will groaned, putting his face in his hands. The teen just snickered.

* * *

Epps waited until they stopped for dinner and everyone else to go inside before going over to Prowl and knocking on the SIC's driver side door. It popped open without remark and he slid himself inside of it, taking a quick moment to look around and forgo the reason he'd come to the mech for that much longer.

"I wanted to apologize for how I sounded earlier," Epps said after a moment, looking at himself in the rear-view mirror so he wouldn't need to look anywhere else. "I do appreciate you making sure all of us know what's what, and that you just want us to be safe."

"I apologize for my reaction as well," Prowl responded softly. "Ratchet already informed myself and the rest of the Autobots here with us that you were becoming ill. I realize now that I was keeping you from sleeping as you had to listen to be respectful, and that your illness may have been why you reacted in such an unseemly manner."

Epps grinned a bit, "Couldn't not come after I promised boss 'bot that I'd watch over Miles."

"Do not worry, we will all watch over the youngling. It would hardly be beneficial to let him perish at this point."

Epps just forced a laugh and patted the steering wheel in a friendly gesture before letting himself out of Prowl. He would never tell the SIC to his face, or his insides, but that comment and ones like it were exactly why the organic side of NEST weren't exactly his biggest fans. The Sergeant realized that sometimes in war losses had to be allowed, but it wasn't comforting to hear things said so matter of factly.

He walked to the restaurant they had stopped at, entering it and looking around until he could find Will, Fig, and Miles. It was made easier when he heard Sunstreaker and Sideswipe's voices rise momentarily, and he went over to the table to see the nearly identical holoforms leaning over one menu and arguing over something on it. Will was looking at them as if he was ready to kill them, Fig was trapped in between the two and just looked amused, and Miles was sitting next to the Captain with a grin on his face. The teen quickly distracted the two from their fight by blowing his straw paper at one of them. Sideswipe quickly retaliated by stealing Fig's straw and just tossing it back at the teen, and Epps laughed as sugar packets started to be used as ammunition and took his own seat. If Prowl saw a future where any of the civilians on base were expendable, then he didn't want to help the mech make that future.

* * *

_At the Autobot base in Nevada_

Sarah Lennox knew that almost as soon as her husband and the others left that the base would be in a bit of a funk. She'd stayed there with Annabelle for just that reason, telling Will she'd take care of morale while he was off playing with the new Autobots. Her husband had laughed and not taken her that seriously, but he wasn't the one that would be left behind. With Ironhide, Prowl, Sunstreaker, and Sideswipe taking Miles, Epps, Fig, and her husband up to Pennsylvania it only left so many Cybertronians on base. What made it almost worse was that one of those was Barricade, who Ratchet assured her was completely safe to be around, but she knew would probably not do much to bring cheer to the base.

The morning after her husband and the others left the base was unusually quiet, something she had expected entirely. That was what happened when some of it's most crucial members up and left, after all. While Will, Fig, and Epps weren't the only soldiers to be there at the moment they were the ones who spent the most time with the Autobots, and three of the Autobots who spent the most time with humans were now missing, too. That was why she took it upon herself to plan an impromptu day of relaxation. She ordered Bumblebee to go pick up Sam's parents and Mikaela, and then she got Glen and a few other male soldiers she didn't know well to help her set up an outside cooking area. Bumblebee was sent a long grocery list of hot dogs, burgers, buns, and so it took the Scout a bit longer than usual to return to base with his elected cargo.

By that afternoon Bumblebee was back and Sarah had sent out a base-wide invitation to the cook out. Judy had helped Bumblebee unload everything and then had helped Sarah get everything set up, even prepping the grills with Glen. With how the little area had been set up, all the Cybertronians that did want to join had to park their alt modes nearby and walk to the set up in their holoforms, as there just wasn't enough room to move around the picnic area in their bipedal modes.

Optimus and Ratchet were the first Autobots to appear, and Sarah greeted them enthusiastically. Ratchet went and sat at a table with Maggie, instantly striking up a conversation with the young woman, while the Prime made his way over to Glen and Judy to see if there was anything he could do to help. It didn't take long for Bumblebee to arrive in his own holoform, his two teens flanking him on either side, and all three appeared to be talking about something, but it was who appeared behind them that really surprised her. Barricade trudged along in the three's wake, looking as if he wanted to be anywhere but where he was now. Sarah couldn't hide her smile; she was quite certain that the poor Decepticon Neutral had probably been forced there by a well meaning Autobot and two brave teens.

Sarah greeted everyone and mech who showed up and made small talk with some of the soldiers she knew well. She went around and helped Judy and Glen give everyone their food and get them drinks that they could enjoy. Then she left for a few minutes to get the stereo that Will kept in his barracks room, carrying it all the way back to where they had set up the picnic area and making it play some music for everyone to enjoy. After that was done she stretched her arms above her head and looked around in satisfaction at everyone enjoying themselves. Even Barricade appeared to be somewhat relaxed, talking to Bumblebee and Ironhide.

"This was a good idea, Sarah."

Sarah put a hand to her chest, turning around quickly to find Optimus' holoform behind her. The Prime grinned sheepishly, and it was a stark contrast to the expressions he usually showed on his bipedal form. She'd noticed that he had started to relax more and show more emotion, but sometimes he'd still hide behind what Will called his battle mask, and she wondered just how effective he was at pushing anything he was feeling to the side for efficiency. She had a scary insight to the Prime, but only because her husband could be just like him.

"What did I tell you about letting me hear your footsteps?" Sarah asked, annoyed.

"Sorry," Optimus responded. "Slipped my mind."

"Don't let it happen again," Sarah warned him, but they both knew that it would. "And of course it was a good idea. With half the base gone we needed something to create a bit of unity."

"You would make a good morale officer," Optimus chuckled.

"Bumblebee and I," Sarah corrected, tilting her head in the Scout's direction.

Optimus turned to look at what she was referring to, and the Prime smiled. Bumblebee and Barricade were sitting side by side, and the Decepticon Neutral was actually laughing. Of course, this probably had to do with the fact that Mikaela looked about ready to kill Sam, but that hardly mattered.

"Pretty sure he only showed up because of Bee," Sarah further explained.

"Don't think the humans had anything to do with it?" Optimus questioned.

Sarah laughed, "I don't think he cares for those humans just yet. Not entirely sure he cares about Bumblebee that much, yet, either. A little birdie told me that our new 'con responds well to challenges, probably what Bumblebee did to get him here."

"You'll have to remind me of who your little birdie is."

"A woman never reveals all of her secrets, Optimus." Sarah grinned, "I have to be a step ahead with you and my husband being the ones in charge here."

The Prime gave her an unamused look, but Sarah knew better than to budge. Miles was and wasn't an obvious source of information; while the teen was getting on with all the Cybertronians he was more open with the humans by far, and Optimus would probably never take that into account initially, though she knew it may cross his mind eventually. So she directed the conversation to a safer topic for awhile before waving the Prime off so he could go talk to Ratchet.

* * *

All the humans ate what they wanted, and even Ratchet didn't complain too much about most of them drinking something caffeinated. When it started to get late Optimus, Ratchet, Sarah, Judy, and most of the other humans who had gathered outside at the picnic area to talk left to go inside. Even to Barricade it had been a relatively nice day. Ratchet and Optimus had both been more than pleasant, Bumblebee seemed willing to keep up an odd sort of rivalry, and none of the humans bothered him that much. It wasn't until all the others left and he stayed outside with Sam, Mikaela, and the Scout that he really even talked.

The teens kept themselves occupied by smuggling a bag of marshmallows the Scout had gladly hidden out of Sam's room, cooking them over the grills slowly as they star gazed. All of them kept the conversation lighthearted and Barricade noticed that any topic that included Miles was danced around for quite awhile. He knew that his relationship with that particular organic would come under fire at some point, he was just waiting for the Autodolt or Sam to bring it up, but it was Mikaela who surprised him.

"Y'know, I just don't get you and Miles." Mikaela said thoughtfully as she ate another marshmallow, "I know you two get on despite acting like you're fighting half the time; as far as I know there's only been two major fights between you."

Barricade just grunted, determined to avoid the conversation as long as possible, so Mikaela turned her attention to Sam. "I was actually surprised you trusted him so readily."

"It wasn't like I trusted Barricade, per say." Sam replied, glancing back at the 'con. "I trust Miles. Lord knows he doesn't always seem to have the brightest ideas, but neither do I, and I know he would never endanger me. And Miles was friends with Barricade, so that obviously meant something, considering he told me straight up that he was told everything. So it was like, I dunno, I just figured something must be behind that, or else Miles wouldn't bother."

"Or he's just stupid." Barricade offered, holoform leaning back in his chair.

"Oh please, you know you like him, _Barry._" Bumblebee teased, holoform wearing a smirk.

Mikaela cut Barricade off before he could protest, "You can go ahead and admit it. Miles will openly claim you as a friend. What's wrong with doing the same?"

"It implies that I am weak and need emotional bonds to sustain me." Barricade growled.

"Then you're weak and need emotional bonds to sustain you." Bee said, not intimidated by anything Barricade could or might try to do. "Means you fit perfectly here. All us 'bots are weak and need emotional bonds to sustain us!"

Barricade glowered at the Scout, but he kept himself from snapping something too offensive. He was smart enough to realize that truly pissing off Bumblebee would be a terrible idea, as the Scout was on his side now by an odd twist of fate, and he couldn't afford to upset the precarious balancing act everymech and a few humans were trying to perform for his stay there.

"Dear Primus," Barricade muttered after finally choosing what to say, "I'm doomed, aren't I?"

"You were doomed from the moment you let Miles know you were alive." Sam told him, wearing a smirk that nearly matched his Guardian's.

"I thought he might go running away," Barricade replied dryly, "It appears that he has an unusual reaction to shock. I think he might be glitched.

Sam laughed, "Nope, he's just Miles!"

Barricade studied the two teens, then took a small moment to read the Scout's holoform. His existence on the base was so far peaceful, especially after his and Miles' act of revenge on Sunstreaker with Ironhide, and he knew that they were all trying to find reasons to trust him. Likewise, he was trying to find reasons to trust them and they knew that. He supposed being honest and a bit open, even if the mere thought almost made his fuel tanks churn, was the best option to make them all a bit comfortable. After all, if they weren't distrustful and wary of him then he had less to worry about.

"Since I'm apparently so easy to read, I suppose I can say that the fleshling does have a certain amount of entertainment value despite being obnoxiously annoying." Barricade admitted grudgingly.

As much as it had pained him to do so, Barricade knew it had been the right choice when Bumblebee showed open surprise at what he said. The Autobots were vastly different from the Decepticons and he had to take that into account when dealing with them and earning a place among their ranks, whether he truly wanted one or not. He may have won at least a week's worth of support from Sam, too, if his face was anything to go by. It was only Mikaela who didn't look surprised or disgustingly pleased by what he'd said, the young woman only keeping her slightly amused expression.

"Guess it's a good thing that Miles knows it's easy to say things that hurt someone else when you're angry or scared for them," Mikaela said softly, and Barricade got the feeling that he was being admonished. "He'll be back soon and you two can go back to fake-fighting or whatever makes you the happiest."

"If he comes back, that is!" Sam replied cheerfully, shrinking in his seat a bit as Mikaela glared at him. "What, I was just joking! Primus!"

"Some of the strongest Autobot warriors are with him, including our top strategist," Bumblebee said placatingly, though whether it was to Barricade or Mikaela was hard to tell.

"Starscream was the last one here that I know of," Barricade said. "It's possible his trine may have come to help him."

Sam waved a hand at them dismissively, "I'm sure everything will be fine. Megatron's still dead at the bottom of the sea so it's not like they're gonna face him."

"If anything they'll be the ones to kill each other," Mikaela said jokingly.

* * *

_The Allspark shard retrieval group: Somewhere in Pennsylvania_

The mission group was lucky that they had Prowl with them. Thanks to the Autobot's police car alt mode they quickly got through any annoying traffic that they ran into; they made great time to Pennsylvania and were even ahead of the SIC's schedule when they reached the state early on the second day.

The only things they stopped for were food and bathroom breaks and even that didn't take long once Will started demanding they eat in the Autobots so Sideswipe and Sunstreaker would stop coming into the restaurants with them. If they continued on like they were and didn't run into any Decepticon trouble in the mountains then they'd arrive at Oklahoma early on the third morning, and have some time to relax.

Before they spent the next however long trekking into the mountains, Prowl had the entire group stop at a small mini-mart so the humans could stock up on food and relieve themselves if they needed to. It was there that Miles bought a small black hair dryer and dark sunglasses. As he had promised Optimus, Epps had been keeping a good eye on Miles. He'd also bought some sinus medicine after dinner the first day so that he wouldn't have to suffer on the trip and Sideswipe had stayed noticeably silent as he'd taken it.

Epps looked at the teen curiously as he left the mini-mart, "What are those for?"

Miles just grinned, putting the shades on and holding the hair dryer like a cop would hold a radar gun at passing cars. Epps just laughed, watching Miles trek back to Prowl and slowly climb inside of Prowl. Already he could hear the SIC and the teen arguing about whether he could actually use the sunglasses and radar to scare passing humans.

They left the mini-mart and for nearly half an hour the only thing that was broadcasted over the Autobot's connected radio channel was Prowl and Miles arguing quietly.

"Maybe Barricade will let you use them while riding inside of him when we get back," Will suggested, comfortable in his own Guardian and just listening in with amusement like most of the others were.

For a moment there was only silence and all of the soldiers wondered if the teen actually realized that it was unlikely that Barricade would be let off base any time soon so that he could do so, but Miles finally spoke up.

"I've been banned from anything cop related inside of him," the teen muttered.

"What did you do?" Epps asked, relaxing in Sideswipe and not even bothering to pretend to drive as he played a game on his phone.

"He has a police radio, right? So he can listen to transmissions and such if he's bored. Basically he just likes to spy, but that's besides the point. He'll actually occasionally pose as an officer and give out helpful information, which I think is my fault after I got him into some of those murder mystery shows," Miles trailed off as he realized he'd gone on a tangent, clearing his throat. "So, anyway, I asked if I could say ten-four. When he said no I asked if I could say roger, over and out, and anything else I could think of. He said I couldn't say anything."

"And you actually listened to him, joven?" Fig asked from inside Sideswipe; like Epps he wasn't bothering to pretend to drive either, instead enjoying a coffee and reading a novel.

"Well…" Miles began, pausing as he thought over whether to tell them or not. "I kind of did. I started using morse code on his dashboard. He didn't catch on for awhile, and I had almost finished ten-four when he figured it out. He started to snap at me but I pointed out I didn't technically say anything. He pointed out that he was a living being and not a car by waiting until I had gotten out and then making me chase him for a mile before he let me back inside."

"Please do not do that to me, Civilian Miles Lancaster." Prowl asked politely, leading the way with his sirens off as it was still dark out and there wasn't much traffic. He had to speak louder than usual to be heard over Sideswipe's and Epps' laughter.

Miles patted Prowl's dashboard, "Don't worry, I don't think you could take it."

All the mechs and humans laughed at that. Prowl wasn't sure whether he should feel relieved or offended by that statement. After a moment he decided to go with relieved, seeing as he could already imagine the young organic inside of him tripping the glitch in his logic processor and offlining him for awhile. They all stayed silent for a bit, except for Sunstreaker and Fig, who were talking in Spanish quietly to each other. Nearly an hour passed before Miles got bored enough to start asking questions.

Miles yawned, "So, where exactly is the Allspark shard? I mean what kind of government building is it going to be in?"

"Actually, the shard is not in a building, it's-" Prowl began, getting ready to explain more thoroughly, only to be interrupted by Ironhide.

"It's with one of our best scientists, Wheeljack, and Trailbreaker, who works as a defensive strategist. He can make force fields." Ironhide cut in quickly, "They're in an area of the Appalachian mountains. That's if Wheeljack hasn't managed to blow himself, the forest, and the shard up first."

Prowl made a sound like clearing his throat to make sure no one else would cut him off, "The facility it used to be in was located in Pennsylvania and Wheeljack and Trailbreaker had been stationed in the state secretly. We've suspected that Decepticons might pick up on it, or that we would eventually wear down your government and get possession of what is ours once more, so none of you organics have ever met those particular Autobots."

"Cool." Miles replied for lack of anything better to say.

"I do not understand," Prowl replied instantly, "Are you chilly?"

Sideswipe nearly swerved into Sunstreaker, quickly going off the road as his twin yelled at him to watch the paint. His entire frame was shaking with laughter. Epps, Fig, and even Will weren't much better off.

"You have a lot to learn, young grass hopper." Miles laughed, patting Prowl's dashboard once more.

"I am older than you, and I am not an insect of this planet." Prowl responded, his tone unusually emotional as he sounded nothing but annoyed.

Ironhide was barely heard through the radio as he muttered to himself, "Dear Primus, he won't survive on this planet."

"Look up the definition of 'cool' on the internet, Prowl." Will told him, but only after taking a moment to collect himself. "Many phrases humans use have more than one meaning. Might as well search for 'young grass hopper' while you're at it."

"Affirmative."

That was the last thing Prowl said for the next few hours, searching the internet to prepare himself for any other strange human customs. Ironhide suggested that the humans try to get some sleep while they still could; the would be arriving at their destination in a few hours and as none of them were sure what was going to happen it was best for them to be rested. Only Fig stayed up initially, the coffee in his body enough to keep him wired and talking to Sunstreaker and Sideswipe through the twin's private channel instead.


	9. Chapter 8

All the humans were woken up by Ironhide cussing loudly in Cybertronian and all of the Autobots nearly slamming on their breaks. Will was up the quickest, demanding to know what was wrong even as he was sitting up, while Epps and Fig simply groaned, the two muttering a few choice words at their rude awakening. Miles took the longest to get up, Prowl having to blow cold air out onto the teen to help him get out of his groggy state faster.

"There's a Decepticon up ahead and we can not get a hold of Wheeljack or Trailbeaker," Prowl explained. "All of you get out and unload the weapons from Ironhide. Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, and I will go up ahead to scope out the area."

The humans quickly scrambled out of the Autobots and unloaded Ironhide as the three other Autobots disappeared off into the trees. As soon as Ironhide was unloaded he too went after the others, though he did wait long enough to make sure there was no immediate threat nearing the organics. The soldiers all collected their favored weapons, loading them carefully. After a minute Miles was given a bat.

"Wait..." Miles looked at the bat, before leveling a glare at Will. "What am I supposed to do with this?"

"Sorry, we couldn't get you any flowers." Epps teased.

"Ironhide and Prowl said there was only one Decepticon up ahead," Will told the teen. "That 'con is currently going against Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, Prowl, and Ironhide soon as well. I doubt even we'll need the guns; it's better that you just don't worry about one."

Miles groaned, but nodded. He knew better than to put up a fight over it since Will was more experienced and actually knew how to handle the weapons they had brought. The four quickly followed the path that the Autobots had taken, coming to a wide clearing. Off to the side they saw what they figured was an offlined and damaged Wheeljack with Trailbreaker, who was slowly losing the energy to sustain his force field. In the middle of the clearing they could see Ironhide, Sunstreaker, and Sideswipe fighting a large Decepticon. They couldn't see Prowl anywhere. Slowly they moved closer until they could see the fight better.

"I know I volunteered for this, but no one told me I'd be signing up for Japanese tentacle porn with giant alien robots," Miles muttered softly, but none of the soldiers commented on it. The teen was staring at the fight with noticeable fear; if joking made him feel better than none of the older men would take that from him.

Ironhide, Sideswipe, and Sunstreaker were all fighting one Decepticon, who seemed to have a mass of tentacles coming out from him and was fending them off fairly well. The soldiers watched the ongoing battle closely, each trying their best to see if there was anyway they could help. Miles just stood there, bat held close to his chest as he waited for someone to order him around so he could know what to do. Sideswipe ran over to the group of humans, then, the red Frontliner casting an imposing figure with the swords that none of the organics had laid eyes on before. He kept a close eye on the battle between Ironhide, Sunstreaker, and Soundwave, silently cursing to Primus that of all Decepticons to show up it would be that one. He adopted a defensive stance as he stood over the group of four, not bothering to actually glance at them as he surveyed the area and kept track of the ongoing battle.

"That's the Decepticons communications officer, Soundwave." Sideswipe informed them, the Autobot unusually tense as he waited for anything to come near them. "He's the reason we couldn't get through to either Wheeljack or Trailbreaker, and also because he knocked Wheeljack offline. Prowl got here first because we thought it best to wait for Ironhide and go for the three headed bull rush; we're pretty sure that between Soundwave and the cassetticons he was taken down. That's kitty, two birds, and earthquake. Prowl managed to destroy earthquake, though, so don't worry about losing your footing, but we don't know where kitty and the birds went. We moved Prowl off behind where Wheeljack and Trailbreaker are. We can't tell if he needs medical attention or if Soundwave just managed to K.O. Him."

And with that Sideswipe was gone, appearing next to his twin as they dodged and slashed at Soundwave in unison. Will looked around, making sure that the cassetticons he had talked about really were no where in sight. They couldn't see Rumble's body and they had no interest in finding it, though the Captain and the Sergeant started to debate whether or not they should try making their way to the opposite side of the field where Trailbreaker was.

Fig quickly smacked them both over the head, effectively shutting them up as he pointed at the fight. "¡Vistazo! That's three Autobots against one Decpeticon. Usually those odds pretty much suck for the side with less, but does it look like Soundwave is about to get his aft handed to him? It's like he can read their moves!"

"You're right," Will said as he and Epps returned their attention to the battle, "If we go for Trailbreaker we could distract our 'bots and the 'con would take advantage of that. They're all on top of their game right now, we can't afford that."

"How well does that Decepticon know their moves?" Epps asked, annoyed.

Will and Epps stood next to each other, examining the battle closely. It almost looked like some kind of weird dance, with Sideswipe and Sunstreaker darting in and around Soundwave to attack while Ironhide circled, dodged, and shot. It was Miles who suggested that Soundwave might be able to read their minds, recalling that Ironhide had mentioned something about a mech that could do that during his training sessions with him, the Weapons Specialist saying that his processor was his best weapon. It had been one of the few times Ironhide had told Miles to just start praying.

"So what are we going to do, then?" Epps asked once the teen was done explaining, looking annoyed. "Are we just supposed to stand here like lawn ornaments?"

"Let's just think for a moment," Will said, but his tone made it into an order.

Fig sighed, rolling his eyes upward as Epps went to snap something at their Captain, but that was when he caught sight of one of the vultures Sideswipe had mentioned. He gestured wildly at it, Miles turning to look as well, but Epps and Will were already in a quiet argument about what they should be doing.

"WILL, EPPS, DUCK!" Miles yelled, swinging his bat as hard as he could as both the Captain and the Sergeant did automatically just that.

When the bat came into contact with the metallic armor of the small Decepticon the resounding smack could be heard loud and clear. He could hardly believe it as Buzzsaw shrieked and flew up. The teen dropped the bat, feeling like his very bones were resonating with the force of the hit. Soundwave momentarily faltered as he turned to pay attention what was going on with Buzzsaw; Will noticed quickly with a small amount of dread that the Decepticon was now beginning to force the Autobots over to them. That, and Buzzsaw was shrieking angrily, swooping back around to attack them once more.

"Miles, get to Prowl and the others!" Will ordered, years of military training kicking in as he aimed at Buzzsaw's wing, only to miss when the Decepticon suddenly went into a dive.

Fig and Epps joined the Captain in shooting at the robotic bird just as Laserbeak flew over to help his twin. Miles obeyed Will without question or complaint, grabbing his bat up again and running over to where he could see Wheeljack and Trailbreaker. He had forgotten all about the force field until he ran right into it, the air just suddenly seeming to force him to bounce back. When they had first arrived it had been a somewhat opague thing, only allowing them a cloudy view of the two mechs inside. Since he hadn't seen it anymore he had assumed it was down, but now he rubbed his nose with a hand, reaching out and poking the force field to try and rationalize what he was feeling.

"I am sorry human," Trailbreaker said softly, drawing Miles' attention up to his face. "I can not leave Wheeljack, nor can I bring the shield down for you. Most of my energy has already been used up. Take this to Prowl, he should online soon."

Trailbreaker's servo came toward him, holding a small, clear container. Inside was the Allspark shard. The teen stared in surprise as the mech just dropped it outside of the barrier for him, belatedly diving to catch it.

"Oh you have got to be kidding me!" Miles exclaimed angrily.

The teen was ready to argue with Trailbreaker, but he turned when he heard Ironhide yell. It was just in time for him to see one of Soundwave's tentacles reaching for him, dancing out of the way of it quickly so that it could be blasted with one of Ironhide's cannon. Even while that was going on Soundwave used the distraction to attack Sideswipe, causing the Frontliner to go down hard and forcing his twin to cover him.

Miles turned to see that the soldiers were having a bit more luck. They had managed to take out one of Laserbeak's wings, leaving him to attack from on the ground. Fig faced him, firing as Will and Epps continued to shoot at Buzzsaw. The teen did another turn until he could find Prowl, the Tactician's prone body just a bit behind Wheeljack and Trailbreaker.

Miles ran over to him, clambering onto his chest and looking him over. He opened his mouth to call Prowl's name, but froze when he heard movement in a tree. He shoved the Allspark shard container in his pants, holding the bat as if he was about to swing at a baseball. Glancing back at the others he could guess the 'con that he would be facing and he slipped off of Prowl, tightening his grip on the bat. If he could swing hard enough to hurt one of the robotic birds enough to send it flying away in pain then he could do the same to a stupid robotic kitty.

But when Ravage jumped out of the tree and landed in front of him, all his confidence fled. He had imagined something like a house cat since Sideswipe had said "kitty". The robotic panther in front of him was a huge and unwelcome surprise.

"Good kitty?" Miles tried, but by the way the Decepticon growled he knew this wouldn't be another Barricade.

He quickly turned around and ran as Ravage chased him. He turned just enough to look behind him and stumbled, realizing his mistake as Ravage leaped at him and sent him onto his back. He yelped as he felt the mech start to claw at his pants, knowing he was going for the shard. The cat worked quickly, somehow managing to pull Miles' baggy pants to his knees, ripping large holes into them with his claws. Miles had to push hard to get Ravage off him, quickly scrambling up and facing the Decepticon with his only weapon. He gripped the bat tight, holding a hitter's stance as the cat mech leaped at him again. He swung, the bat connecting hard to Ravage's face. He gave a victory cry as he watched the cat mech land on the ground ungracefully, hissing angrily.

He heard movement behind him, and he turned to find that the Tactician had levered himself on to one elbow strut and was looking at him. He grinned cockily at the mech.

"Welcome back, Prowler." Miles greeted, "Think we got this just about handled."

The teen had no warning outside of Prowl venting sharply, the mech's blue optics darting to something behind him. The next thing he knew he was crashing towards the ground on his stomach, the wind getting knocked out of him as Ravage's heavy weight settled on top of him once more and his face was shoved into the ground. He was barely able to suck in a shocked breath before the cat mech's claws were tearing into his back and arm. The teen let out a pained yelp, but it was muffled in the grass. He felt Ravage's weight suddenly disappear, but he didn't think anything of it as he groaned in pain, taking deep breaths to try and calm himself down. He had been unbelievably stupid, not bothering to check to make sure that Ravage was actually leaving when he had hit the Decepticon in the head with his bat, but hearing Prowl moving behind him had made him feel safe and he had turned without thinking.

The teen tensed when he heard movement again, but he quickly relaxed when he saw Prowl leaning over him from the corner of his eye. The SIC activated his holoform to look him over, and he hissed in pain at the touches.

"I think I made a mistake. Sorry," Miles apologized, and Prowl made an unintelligible noise as the teen reached into his shredded pants and revealed the shard.

"I think that you could have done something a lot worse," Prowl said after a moment as he helped the teen to stand up, "Like gone and died, or lost the shard altogether."

Across the field Fig could be heard giving a victory whoop as the soldiers finally took Buzzsaw down. Epps kicked the tiny Decepticon in the head as an extra precaution, but all of them jumped when they heard Ironhide cussing angrily in a mixture of languages. Soundwave was taking off into the air, quickly accelerating high into the sky as Laserbeak joined him. Cybertronian, English, Japanese, Spanish, French, and several that sounded as if they came from other planets left his mouth as Ironhide shot at the large Decepticon with his cannon.

Miles was amazed that the battle was over as simply as that. The teen allowed himself to be picked up carefully by Prowl, the Autobot moving them both over to Wheeljack and Trailbreaker. Sunstreaker helped Sideswipe over to them, the red Frontline leaning on his brother heavily, and Ironhide followed behind the twins with the soldiers in his shadow. Trailbreaker let the force field down completely as he finally relaxed, quickly falling into recharge after saying a few short sentences to his fellow 'bots in Cybertronian.

* * *

_At the Nevada base_

While the Allspark mission group battled Soundwave and his cassetticons, the sun shined brightly down on the NEST base in Nevada. Bumblebee relaxed outside in the sun, enjoying the warmth of it on his armor. For all the world it looked like he was merely sunbathing.

Sam walked over to his Guardian with a frown, placing a hand on the hood idly. He might not have thought anything about the Scout's apparent urge to sunbathe if he hadn't been sitting directly outside of the hanger that Barricade had essentially claimed as his own. The teen was about to ask why he was there when an enraged scream left the hangar, making him jump and reach for the door handle out of instinct, figuring the safest place was inside Bumblebee.

At that point Barricade stormed out of his hangar, his metal frame now a very bright pink. Sam let his mouth drop open in shock as he stared at the Decepticon Neutral for a moment. As amusement filled him he quickly covered his mouth with a hand, not wanting the already enraged mech to get angry at him for laughing.

"Slagging Autobot!" Barricade growled, glaring at Bumblebee as he sat innocently in his alt form. "You _will_ pay."

* * *

_The Allspark shard retrieval group_

After making sure that Soundwave truly had left, the Autobots set about attending to any and all wounds on each other. Sideswipe needed a temporary repair so he could manage to change into his alt mode; he'd need to stay that way until they got to First Aid or else he'd not manage to change into it a second time. Prowl focused mainly on Wheeljack while Ironhide made sure Trailbreaker refueled and got his energy back up.

Miles sat on the ground in his boxers as Will checked over his back and the back of the arm that had been hurt, complaining about how he needed a new everything after Ravage. The teen had to wait until Prowl returned to his alt mode or stopped doing field repairs on Wheeljack before he could get the clothes he'd bothered to pack and change into them. Epps offered to buy him replacement clothing, surprising both Miles and Fig, although Will just gave his Sergeant a look. The Captain, at least, knew it was only because he had money from the bet he'd won because of the teen's fight with Barricade.

Once Prowl took care of all the medical work he could, the group left for Oklahoma, now accompanied by Wheeljack and Trailbreaker. This time, with Sideswipe and Wheeljack injured, they couldn't abuse Prowl's alt mode as much and took the journey back a lot slower. The soldiers almost unanimously decided to sleep on the way back to the western part of the United States, though they all took turns sleeping several hours at a time to make sure that one of them could be awake in case they were needed to talk to any other humans. Miles slept almost the entire trip away, the adrenaline crash hitting him hard.

When they arrived at the abandoned building that the two living Autobots and the dead Autobots' body were, it was already late at night. They were behind schedule now, and Miles was quickly woken up and ushered inside the building with the soldiers. There were very brief introductions and then all the Cybertronians just left the humans alone with Jazz's body. They did this so First Aid could give them all extensive checks, far better than Prowl would be at it, and so they could get some recharge. None of the humans complained, and not even Prowl complained about missing their deadline this way.

Fig looked at his two comrades, "Well what are we supposed to do while the 'bots are ignoring us?"

"Think they just want us to stay here like good little humans," Will said sarcastically, although there was a touch of bitterness to it.

That they weren't invited into the bigger adjoining room with the Autobots was a bit of a blow to the Captain. He knew it was partially because Inferno and First Aid were not used to humans, the two having been with Jazz's body since they had landed. But it was also because his Guardian was distracted and the twins and Prowl held no true love for a specific organic yet, though the twins seemed to be getting on surprisingly well with Fig. Without Ironhide to play spokesperson then they were left in the dust.

But just because he could understand why didn't mean he liked it. It left him, his men, and the teen stuck to fend by themselves for however long the Autobots decided to leave them alone. Miles had already found a nice corner for himself, the teen careful with how he sat, but the room itself was pretty spare. Outside of Jazz's body there was literally nothing inside of it. He knew that Jazz's body was only in such an odd location because Ratchet had hidden it, even from Optimus initially, so the government could not force them to do one thing or another with it like they had Megatron's. This gave First Aid plenty of time to repair Jazz to what would have been a working state if he'd had a spark.

"Maybe we should try to bring Jazz back?" Miles asked, "I mean, do we really need to wait for Ratch?"

"Well, I do have the shard..." Epps said, taking it out of one of his back pockets. "Pretty sure Prowl meant to get it but forgot. Think all of them are too damn tired."

Epps looked at Will and the Captain raised a hand to gesture that he was thinking. He wasn't sure that it was the best of ideas, but he figured that at the worst the Allspark shard would only work for a Cybertronian. After all, it would make sense.

"It should be safe," Will looked at Jazz's prone form, "Sam handled it in Mission City and even used it to kill Megatron with no backlash. Worst case scenario, and what I think will be likely to happen, is that you just won't be able to get it to work at all."

"Me?" Epps asked, "Why does it have to be me?"

"You're the one with the shard," Miles pointed out, and Will nodded, grinning.

Epps cursed under his breath, looking to Fig for support, but the Spanish man just shrugged his shoulders. With a sigh he quickly accepted his fate, removing the shard from its' container and holding it in his hand. He moved closer to Jazz's body to look at it, then walked around the silver frame, looking for the best way to do what he wanted.

The Sergearnt had just decided to climb his way onto Jazz's chassis when Miles spoke up again.

"Let's just pray that it doesn't do anything freaky to you," Miles said, his tone obviously joking.

But Epps froze, stuck half hoisting himself up onto Jazz's chassis and half wanting to push himself back down. He couldn't stop himself from wondering about just what the shard could do to him. Could it make him into some weird cyborg, join his soul and Jazz's so that they lived on in his body together, or in Jazz's body together? What if it sent it's energy into him and he became like the Cybertronian birthing unit, or if it changed him into a Cybertronian completely? Would it make him into one like the mountain dew dispenser in Mission City, would he be himself anymore? __What if it killed him?__

"Epps?" Will called, seeing his friend frozen while still in the process of climbing Jazz. "Epps, earth to Epps? Jesus, Miles, I think you broke him!"

"You mean Primus," Epps corrected, only somewhat sarcastic. "And it's nothing. If I don't make it tell everyone I love them. Including Barricade and Mojo."

"Do not be over dramatic, pendejo!" Fig laughed, "Why would the shard do something to a human?"

That made him feel a little better. Epps finished climbing Jazz, looking at the very obviously repaired line where the mech had been welded back together. The Saboteur had died long before any of the soldiers had managed to talk to him well enough to get to know him, but he'd heard stories after arriving at NEST base about how awesome the mech had been.

"Well, what the fuck am I supposed to do?" Epps asked after a moment of staring down at Jazz's body.

"Try putting it in the spark chamber?" Will suggested, his tone falsely sweet. "Since that is where the spark goes, after all."

Epps shot a glare at his Captain before moving closer to the open space in Jazz's chassis. He knelt down, trying to decide what exactly he should do with the shard, but that was when he realized he wouldn't have to put much thought into it. The hand holding the Allspark shard was going oddly numb and he watched in surprise as it seemed to move of it's own accord. He averted his eyes as his entire body jerked forward so that his hand could go inside of the spark chamber; he heard an audible click as an almost painful heat seemed to blast outward from the chamber at him, followed by a bright light.

He threw his hands up to protect his eyes, the Allspark giving him back control of his one arm, but within seconds the bright light faded. He kept his eyes clenched tight just in case until he heard a whirring sound and something sliding shut slowly. Then Jazz was shifting underneath him, Epps opening his eyes to a cannon being pointed directly in his face and a bright blue visor looking at him.

"Aw, come on," he couldn't help but whine, "Ironhide's supposed to be the trigger happy one!"

This seemed to make Jazz falter, the mech deactivating his weapon and looking around. Battle protocols had been some of the first to come online; he had felt something near his open spark chamber and reacted accordingly. Now he was trying to understand where he was and gather any clues about the room he was in, but outside of the organic on him the only other things in the room were three more organics.

Glancing at the human on top of him again once he was sure he wasn't in any immediate danger, he slowly accessed his memory files. The last thing he remembered was arguing with his Prime under the bridge after Bumblebee had been taken away by the people from Sector Seven. He didn't see anyone he could recognize, but the colored human had said Ironhide's name, and he could recognize standard military uniforms.

"We should probably call one of the 'bots in." Will said softly, not wanting to startle Jazz anymore than the mech already seemed to be. "First Aid, maybe."

The newly reactivated Autobot sat up without thinking, knocking Epps off his chest. The Sergeant let out a loud curse, expecting to land roughly on the floor but surprised when he was caught in a large servo instead. He looked up at Jazz again, and while he couldn't read anything on the mech's faceplates, he could only guess that it was a sort of apology for knocking him off and scaring him. That, or he might have thought Ratchet was there as well and considered hurting a fragile organic a bad thing.

"I'm Sergeant Robert Epps," he said as he introduced himself, grinning. "But you can call me Epps, Jazz-man. The other guy who just spoke is Captain William Lennox, or Will. Then there's Technical Officer Jorge Figuora, or just Fig. Little dude is Miles Lancaster, but he's just a civvy."

"Where am Ah?" Jazz asked, taking another look around and trying to scan for any nearby spark resonances. "When did First Aid get here?"

"We can't tell you when he got here since we don't know, but the rest of the 'bots are in the other room. We had a run in with Soundwave while retrieving the Allspark shard from Wheeljack and Trailbreaker; the scientist, Prowl, and Sideswipe were injured and need to be seen by First Aid." Epps explained.

Will started to speak then, assuming his roll of leader perfectly as he briefed Jazz on everything that had happened. He started all the way back in Mission City, from when Jazz had been torn in half, then the subsequent win of the Autobots and death of Megatron. How the government had allowed the NEST base to be created, how Miles had found Barricade and the mech was now a Decepticon Neutral, and then why they had been going to get the Allspark shard in the first place. He kept it relatively short, but ended the briefing with the battle they'd had with Soundwave. He put more detail into that, letting the Saboteur know just what injuries had occurred specifically.

While Will was filling Jazz in on just about everything, Fig went and got the other Autobots. Epps and Miles waved to them as they filed in, surprised by the odd looks on their face plates. Sideswipe and Sunstreaker were looking at Jazz in obvious shock, the rest of the mechs not fairing much better. It was finally Prowl who stepped forward.

"We are happy that Jazz is back, but what in the world gave you idea to do it on your own?" Prowl asked, looking at the humans. "The consequences of contact with the Allspark are unknown to you."

"Sam had prolonged contact with the Allspark when it was whole and even used its' energy to destroy Megatron," Epps pointed out. "If that had no effect on one of us then we didn't think that something as small as this would have one, either."

"Well Ah thank you for thinking to do this, Epps." Jazz practically purred, "It's fragging good to be back."

"We thank you as well," Prowl agreed, though he seemed reluctant to do so. "But now I suggest you organics go do whatever you want to. Sleep, preferably, so that we do not have to worry about you getting into anymore trouble."

Will might have spoken up for that blatant brush off and disrespect if Ironhide hadn't shaken his helm minutely behind the Tactician. The Weapons Specialist was giving Prowl an annoyed look and that was the only thing that actually gave the Captain some comfort; at least not all of the Autobots agreed with Prowl's treatment of them. The Tactician wasn't usually this bad, though, and that was his only saving grace. It seemed that on the mission he had reverted to being as he had when he'd first shown up on the base, thinking that the humans were nothing more than a nuisance that had to be watched over so they wouldn't hurt themselves.

"We might as well listen to them," Will sighed, because all of the Autobots had disappeared back into the other room. "Don't really have any other options. We don't know how far the next town is and we don't have a car, sentient or non."

The other three sighed as well, but decided to listen. They all made their own places to sleep, Epps being the first to fall asleep while using his knapsack as a pillow. Miles noticed this and from his spot on his sleeping bag he grinned, whispering to Fig and Will about how they could mess with the Sergeant. Will might have protested if he didn't think something to amuse the teen was such a good idea, not that he couldn't use a bit of amusement after what a disaster the mission had turned into.

* * *

Epps woke up slowly to a sinus headache, unsurprised that his throat was dry and sore after a few days of continuous illness. He couldn't tell what time it was, but from the way the birds were creating a ruckus outside he decided that it was probably too damn early and that he could afford to keep his eyes closed just a little longer. He heard the muffled sounds of movement; ped falls on concrete and the distinct clacking of Will's boots. He heard them pause directly beside where he was laying and he couldn't help but wonder what the hell was going on.

"He's… different, a'ight." Jazz spoke softly. "Do humans usually do this?"

Will spoke up, voice sounding oddly strained. "N-no… We never change like that…"

Epps felt his heart drop into his stomach, that irrational fear that the Allspark shard would do something to him creeping back up.

"Do you think it's because of what he did for me? Ah'd hate that…" Jazz said, trailing off.

"Estimado Dios…" Fig muttered. "Will, we should… Should go tell his family…"

"Y-yeah." Will replied, and Epps could hear them walk towards the door. Heard it open and then close. It felt like his body had seized up with panic, not wanting to open his eyes or alert them that he was awake so that he wouldn't have to face reality.

"Slag, he's so different." Jazz said softly. "Ah don't think Ratchet would be able to do anything for 'im."

"How's he going to react?" Miles asked. "He'll be devastated."

And at that it finally seemed like Epps could move as his eyes snapped open and he looked at the ceiling.

"Oh God! Oh Primus! I'm… I'm…" He knew he sounded near hysterics but he couldn't bring himself to care, bringing his hand up to his face to examine it. "I'm… black?"

Epps stared at his completely normal looking hand for a bewildered moment, before the sound of choked laughter reached him and with a flush of anger he realized that he had been duped. He turned his head and saw Will and Fig beside the door, hands over their mouths as their bodies shook with laughter. Miles was further into the room, laughing so hard that he was nearly silent. Jazz even appeared amused, a lot more life showing up on the mech's faceplates compared to the night before.

"Seriously? Fuck you guys!" Epps snapped, sitting up and giving them all the darkest look he could. "I hate all of you."

"Sorry, mah man." Jazz apologized, though he didn't sound the least bit apologetic. "The young one can be very convincing."

"This means war," Epps warned Miles, though the teen didn't seem to be able to stop laughing long enough to care. The Sergeant sulked, "And Jazz is on _my_ team from now on. You already have Fig and Will apparently, slaggin' traitors."

Will just smirked at him, his Captain and Fig starting to tease him about how easily he'd been duped while Miles collected himself and wiped at his eyes. Epps pretended to ignore the both of them, chancing a look at the Saboteur instead. Jazz was looking at them all with amusement and the Sergeant was happy to see that the mech seemed to be enjoying his life, even if it had led to an embarrassing wake up call for him.

* * *

Nearly an entire day later and they were almost back to the Nevada base. There were only a few hours left to go, Sideswipe and Wheeljack still ordered to take it slow so that their bodies could have a break. Those hours were planned without any pit stops. The humans had all been fed and allowed to use the restroom a final time so they could finish the trip as quickly as possible. Epps had switched from riding in Sideswipe to riding in Jazz. Neither of the 'bots minded, Jazz liking Epps just a bit more than the other humans because Epps was the one to bring him back and he was taking the time to introduce the mech to some excellent Earth music. Sideswipe minded even less because this made it easier for him and Sunstreaker to have private conversations with just Fig listening in.

Unbeknownst to Prowl, Jazz had dared Miles to annoy the strict 'bot as much as he could. Though he knew some of his other Autobots hadn't picked up on how the humans felt towards Prowl, excluding Ironhide, he saw it and recognize why it was happening. He also knew that if something didn't happen as a sort of catalyst to bring them closer together then things would quickly get rough for both sides, so the Saboteur decided that some good natured pranking wouldn't be amiss. It would ease the organics' feelings for a bit and perhaps make the SIC realize his place better. So far it had been going perfectly with the teen asking pointless question after pointless question, gum, drinks, and a number of other things that had easily set Prowl off. The SIC was about on his last nerve concerning the human, and Jazz couldn't wait to see what he would do when it broke.

Epps and Miles were the only humans still awake. Originally it had been because when they crossed into Nevada they both wanted to annoy all the 'bots until they honked their horns, but now just neither of them could fall asleep. The teen hadn't been able to sleep peacefully since his adrenaline crash, his back too sore and raw from the run in with Ravage. There wasn't much room to actually lay down in Prowl in the first place, much less to do so comfortably on his stomach. The Sergeant just wasn't able to sleep, awake on a mixed cocktail of sinus medicine and strong coffee.

Both humans were surprised when Prowl suddenly announced that he was contacting the base.

"Prowl to base," Prowl said alloud, letting the two humans know that the base was being contacted. "Base come in."

"This is base." Barricade's voice came over the radio, and all of the Autobots on the mission were surprised by it. "Barricade here, with the insect and Prime."

Miles quickly spoke up before Prowl could say anything else, "Barry! I'm never cheating on you with another Cybertronian who has a cop car alt mode again! Prowl won't let me do _anything_! He's banned me from asking questions, answering questions, drinking anything, and even chewing gum! He's no fun at all!"

"You dropped the gum on my floor." Prowl replied calmly, having expected Miles' out burst.

"I sneezed!" Miles defended himself, "It's a natural human thing and you know it!"

"You squirted the liquid all over my dashboard," Prowl pointed out, obviously struggling to keep his voice calm and devoid of annoyance.

"That was all Epps fault!" Miles accused easily, huffing in false anger. "He's the one that mentioned sixty-nining with Jazz! Just to get me to do it, I tell you! It's a conspiracy!"

Prowl let out an annoyed sound, "No talking from now until we get to the base, Miles Lancaster. Since you are a minor we count as your guardians, and society claims that you must abide by our rules."

"What?" Miles sputtered angrily as Epps started laughing his ass off over the radio connection, "You can't ground me!"

"You dropped gum in me, sprayed liquid all over my dashboard, fought with me to get me to honk once we crossed the Nevada state line and then attempted to honk me yourself, kept trying to use the sunglasses and hair dryer whenever we stopped to scare people, and there have been many other offenses. You even managed to trip my glitch and we were just lucky I wasn't driving." Prowl listed off each offense clearly, voice growing more and more annoyed as he even began to raise it. "I believe I have every right to ground you and I may even throw you in the brig when we get back. You are almost as annoying as the twins."

Miles was silent for a moment, and then he grinned. "Are there any rules that I broke in that rule book thing you mention all the time?"

"…No." Prowl admitted reluctantly, "But you are still on silent time unless you wish for me to let Ironhide practice his aim on you."

Miles groaned, while Jazz and Epps laughed. With the teen threatened into silence, Prowl began to tell his Prime about the injuries that had occurred and any loose ends, like Soundwave, that still needed to be taken care of. After awhile Miles started to tap out morse code on his dashboard, hoping that Barricade would recognize it and be able to catch it.

* * *

_At the Nevada base_

Optimus Prime had been waiting for Prowl's call for awhile, knowing the mech to be nothing if not punctual. He had invited Barricade and Bumblebee to join him in wait for it, the Scout and Ratchet already automatically able to join the radio call if they wanted, though it needed to be broadcasted for the Decepticon Neutral as he didn't have access to that particular comm frequency just yet.

Bumblebee and Barricade had joined him, then immediately had done several rounds of what the humans called 'rock, paper, scissors' to decide just who could answer when Prowl finally called. The two had been going back and forth the past several days, getting the closest they possibly could to fighting without actually coming to blows. When the Scout had painted Barricade, Optimus had finally decided to step in and order him to clean it all off. Bumblebee had sulked then, and now after his loss at the human hand game, he was sulking again when Barricade responded confidently as soon as Prowl tried to connect with them. Whatever Prowl was going to say in response was quickly interrupted by Miles, though, and the three Cybertronians listened in silences as the SIC argued with the teen.

The Scout and the Prime were in shock as Prowl actually raised his voice at the teen, but Barricade just allowed himself a small smirk.

"Figures one of you stupid 'bots couldn't put up with what I can put up with on a daily basis," Barricade said smugly.

Neither Optimus or Bumblebee bothered to reply to him. They listened as Prowl filled them in on all the injuries that had occurred during the mission so that Ratchet could be prepared to make sure everything was okay upon their return. Then the Tactician went over just who it was they had battled and just who had been so thoughtful as to bring back Jazz; as he talked they could hear an odd taping sound in the background, but he didn't comment on it and neither did they.

"Jazz is do-" Prowl started to say, before actually growling. "Would you stop that infernal tapping?"

"Sorry." They heard Miles reply a second later, and the tapping stopped.

"As I was saying, Jazz is doing fine." Prowl finished shortly, obviously frazzled by the teen. "That is all the immediate information you need for our arrival, Prowl out."

Optimus and Bumblebee looked at each other in wonderment at Prowl's annoyed behavior. It was then that they both received a comm from Jazz, the Saboteur explaining just what he had been having Miles do, and the two started to laugh.

Barricade was too busy replaying the entire conversation from his memory files to care about why the Scout and Prime were laughing. He'd guessed at why Miles had been making a tapping noise, and sure enough, once he'd played out the entire message, he found a message from the teen.

_"I'm sorry," _the code translated to._ "Over and out."_


	10. Chapter 9

The mission group had finally arrived back on base. Instead of immediately going to the debriefing that Optimus wanted the first few hours of the morning were spent making sure everyone was fed, washed, and as healthy as Ratchet could possibly make them. First Aid wasn't a bad medic, but the mech hadn't had any supplies in Oklahoma, so he had done what he could temporarily to get them back so Ratchet could take care of the long term repairs. Miles was the only human from the trip noticeably hurt; due to this and the fact that Epps still wasn't feeling that well—a mere 'bug' as he called it and a minor cold according to Ratchet— they decided to hold the debriefing in Will's office so the two could have somewhere comfortable to sit if they wanted to do so. This meant that the Cybertronians had to use their holoforms, but no fuss was made over such a small thing. In fact, Bumblebee and Sam had already made their way inside and dragged Barricade along with them.

Optimus Prime joined them shortly, temporarily allowed to commandeer Will's desk for his own use to host the meeting. Prowl came in after him, Jazz and Epps walking in behind him together. Jazz's holoform was inspired by Epps, the only one of the Cybertronians to appear as a black human, although the Saboteur had to be taller than the Sergeant just to annoy him. Fig and Will followed after the pair, Miles trailing behind them, and then finally Ironhide showed up after storing away all the weapons. First Aid, Inferno, Wheeljack, and Trailbreaker had been allowed to skip the debriefing; Sunstreaker and Sideswipe had been dismissed to show the four new 'bots around.

Outside of Optimus, only Barricade, Bumblebee, and Sam were bothering to sit down. All of those that had been on the mission stood at attention in front of the Prime, even Miles doing his best to copy the soldiers' stance.

"It is good to see you back, old friend." Optimus said, addressing Jazz. "I do have to commend you on your choice of holoform, it will help us blend in more if we diversify our looks."

Jazz grinned, "Glad ta be back, Optimus."

"I've heard that you all had quiet the time." The Prime's gaze swept over the four humans in front of him before landing on Miles, "I am unsure whether to question why you took on Ravage on your own, or if I should be weary of the answer."

"He was following orders, actually." Will replied, stepping in. "He was told to go to Wheeljack and Trailbreaker for safety reasons. Apparently Trailbreaker feared his shield going down and being attacked directly by Soundwave so he gave Miles the shard and ordered him over to Prowl, who was supposed to wake up sooner than he did. He was doing exactly what he was ordered to."

"There was no one near enough to me that could have protected him," Prowl added, "Will could not have known that he would be given the shard and become a target because of it. It was an unfortunate and unforeseen circumstance."

Optimus looked at the Captain and SIC carefully, trying to see if they were just defending the teen to try and keep him out of trouble or if they were defending him by merely telling the truth. It was unlikely that Prowl would lie to him, especially for organics he held no real positive emotions towards as of yet, and it was even more unlikely that the Autobots on the trip or the soldiers would have just let Miles wander out of their sight to go and get hurt. Some circumstances outside of their control had to have happened, which meant the teen didn't need to be punished.

"I see," Optimus replied after a long moment before turning to look at the teen. "How is your prognosis then, Miles?"

"Temporary scratching post but that was it," Miles answered. "Prowl got the robo-cat off me before he could do anything too serious. Ratchet put in a few stitches but said I probably would have been fine without it. I was more worried about our 'bots and Mr. Tentacle Pron then kitty, to be honest."

"Tentacle pron?" Optimus asked, raising an optic ridge.

"Do not look that up under any circumstances, Prime." Prowl said dryly, shooting Miles a dark look. "It is a rather odd idea from the humans and picturing the Decepticon Communications Officer Soundwave doing such things is… unpleasant, to say the least."

"Well, it's not _my_ fault that you took it upon yourself to imagine it right after you looked it up!" Miles replied with a huff.

"I see you two have been…" Here the Prime paused as he considered his word choice. "Getting along well."

"I fully commend Decepticon Neutral Barricade on how long he has put up with Civilian Miles Lancaster. I thought all Decepticons were programmed to kill anything they found annoying; yet Civilian Miles Lancaster still lives." Prowl replied, hiding an all too obvious insult at the teen in the compliment for Barricade.

"Hey!" Miles cried indignantly, "Are you calling me annoying?"

"So he still hasn't figured out that Jazz put you up to it yet?" Will asked, not caring at all that he was giving the teen and probably Epps away, though he widened his eyes and put his hand over his mouth to at least act like he had slipped.

The room went silent for a moment as Prowl turned and looked to Jazz, who was doing his best to look innocent. Epps was glaring at his Captain, which meant he obviously didn't buy the slip up. The look on Prowl's face was an odd one; a mixture between anger and 'why me'. It was Miles who broke the silence as he looked between Prowl and Optimus with a slightly nervous gaze.

"He's technically my superior officer so that means I was just following orders. I can't be put in the brig for that, can I?" Miles asked hesitantly, causing Epps to stop glaring at Will and laugh instead.

"I believe Prowl might have to work on a rule book that covers Cybertronians and humans working together, but no, you won't be put in the brig." Optimus assured him.

"Alright!" Miles grinned, going and leaning against the wall near Barricade, Sam, and Bumblebee.

"We will have a talk later in my office, Jazz." Prowl said finally, ignoring his Prime and the teen that had been annoying him.

"Aw, Prowler, Ah was jus' havin' some fun." Jazz said, a smirk coming onto his face as he got ready to play his trump card. "Comin' back from the dead an' all, Ah jus' wante' a sense of… normalcy."

Most of the anger visibly left Prowl at that, but he kept his glare on Jazz for a moment before turning back to Optimus. He ignored Epps, who was snickering, and the fact that his Prime was hiding his beyond obvious amusement.

"When I do write that rule book Miles has helped me think of many things to add to it." Prowl said, not even looking at Miles. "No pretending to have a speed radar to scare humans into behaving the law, no gum, no sending a Cybertronian to search for something that will cause any glitch they have to kick in, and no 9,001 cubes of energon on the wall."

"Why 9,001?" Sam asked, feigning ignorance. He knew exactly why, of course, but that didn't mean he couldn't get enjoyment out of asking.

Epps, Will, Miles, Jazz, and even Bumblebee immediately said "Because it's over 9,000!" at the same time. Sam broke down into laughter, while Ironhide and Fig just shook their heads in amusement. Barricade rolled his eyes and Optimus just gave his men an amused smile, Prowl's confused and exasperated look only making it all more amusing.

If nothing else, he was happy to see that his 'bots had been taking to the human culture, appearing to even enjoy some of it as well as getting along with Earth's most dominant species. He would be sad to see the day when their current human allies had to pass and he generally tended to push the thought out of his processors. He knew how close some of his 'bots were getting to them, especially Bumblebee and Ironhide. He'd hate to see their reaction when their favorite humans died.

He coughed, drawing everyone's attention to him again. "If you would begin the debriefing, Prowl. I'm sure most of us would like to be somewhere else."

"You got that right!" Epps said, stretching his arms above his head. "Miles and me stayed up the whole last day just to drive Prowl bonkers. My blood mainly consists of coffee and I've got to take a piss."

Prowl pointedly decided to ignore that remark, and started to talk. All of the Autobots knew that the SIC could simply send his Prime a databurst of what had happened, but for the sake of the humans and the Decepticon Neutral in the room, he would be going through everything in detail.

He went over which human had been in which Autobot, where they stopped, what time they stopped, and what they stopped for. Any purchases that the humans made and actually brought into the Autobots were mentioned. How they had abused his alt mode most of the way to get their faster and the subsequent injuries that had made them miss their deadline. The battle with Soundwave and the cassetticons, how he took out Rumble but was offlined by the rest of the mini 'cons. That Fig, Will, and Epps deactivated either Laserbeak or Buzzsaw, and that Miles had gone after Ravage and had eventually worked with Prowl to deactivate the cat mech. He included that Epps was the one to put the Allspark shard in Jazz's spark chamber, and that First Aid had looked over the 'bots and humans a bit. Then he included the ride home.

By the time he was done about an hour had past, he was nothing if not thorough. Epps had begun shifting from foot to foot, discreetly taking out his phone and occasionally texting Will. Will had done his best to ignore Epps until the Sergeant started to kick him in the shin to get him to reply. Fig pulled out a paper back from his pants, though no one could figure out how he had managed to stuff it in there. Ironhide and Jazz just let most of their consciousness return to their real bodies, accessing the internet, cleaning weapons, and talking to people outside of the office. Barricade and Optimus just stayed still and listened, though both wandered off in their own thoughts. Miles had fallen asleep leaning against the wall, and Bumblebee and Sam were currently throwing pieces of paper at each other.

It took everyone a moment to realize that Prowl had actually finished; another moment was needed for Sam and Bumblebee to sit upright again, Fig to put his book away, Jazz and Ironhide to snap their consciousness back to their holoforms, and Will and Epps to put their phones away. Sam didn't notice that Miles had fallen asleep until Barricade nudged him, gesturing to their mutual friend.

"Thank you, Prowl. You, Sam, Bumblebee, Barricade, and Miles may go." Optimus said, effectively dismissing them before he turned his attention to the others in his office. He told Epps, Will, and Fig he expected a report from each of them, and the same to Ironhide and Jazz.

"Here," Sam said as he got up from his seat, moving over to Miles and placing a hand on the other teen's shoulder. He used that to push him away from the wall and towards Barricade. "You can have him."

This naturally startled Miles into waking up, the teen panicking as he stumbled and started to fall. A form stepped out and caught him; in his still groggy state it took him a moment to realize it was Barricade and just what had happened to make him fall in the first place, with Sam's laughter being a dead give away.

"Barry!" Miles exclaimed, grinning up at the holoform's face. "I heard you were a good boy while I was gone. I'm very proud of you."

Barricade scoffed, glaring at Miles as he let go of the teenager. "It's amazing how quickly you make me wish I had dropped you."

"Aw, Barry, you know you missed me!" Miles pouted, Sam's snickering increasing.

"Think again, fleshling." Barricade growled, leaving the room.

"He missed me." Miles told Sam confidently, smirking at his friend.

"I'm just happy you haven't been killed yet," Sam replied, throwing his arm around Miles' shoulders. He steered the both of them out of Will's office, Bumblebee's holoform following behind them. "We need to keep you away from Cybertronians with cop car alt modes, my friend."

"I have to agree with Samuel on this one, Miles. I am pleasantly surprised that Barricade has restrained from deactivating you." Bumblebee teased, smirking slightly.

Miles huffed, "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up you two. Soon as someone does kill me for being obnoxiously annoying you'll both be sorry!"

Bumblebee and Sam laughed, the three meeting up with Barricade near the humans dining facilities so that Sam could grab lunch, before heading to the barracks so Miles could get some sleep.

* * *

Miles woke up to the sound of a door opening and he blearily looked at the clock that was on Sam's dresser. He'd gone back to their shared room and fallen asleep by noon, now it was just nearing nine at night. He'd spent his entire sleep on his stomach, favoring it to his back with it still so raw.

"How was dinner?" Miles asked sleepily, "And did you ever call my parents to explain that I wouldn't be returning home right away?"

"Not the Insect's favorite," a voice replied.

Miles moved to sit up in shock, a hand on his shoulder keeping him down even as his mind caught up and realized that it was Barricade's holoform in the room and not Sam. The teen huffed, settling down onto his stomach again and turning his head enough so that he could look at the 'con.

"Take off your shirt," Barricade ordered.

"Why do all of your apologies turn out to be something like this?" Miles grumbled, "Because I swear if someone told you that getting me naked was a good way to-"

"I am not asking to see you naked," Barricade interrupted as he growled, "I have a salve from Ratchet for your back."

"Oh."

The teen squirmed out of his t-shirt then, lying back down on his bed so that the 'con could work on his back. Barricade quickly set to work, Miles holding his tongue to not complain about how cold the ointment was. The holoform was putting the ointment on with something akin to hesitation, applying it to the widest cut on his upper back gently and then pausing as if he was waiting for Miles to say something.

And it was that hesitation that gave the 'con away and made Miles realize he was lying. He recalled that Ratchet had ordered him to come back to the Med-bay when he woke up so that the medic could put on the ointment for him; while he almost could believe that the CMO would give the salve to someone else it seemed unlikely he would willingly give it to someone without telling them exactly how to apply it. Like what way they should put it on and how much pressure they should avoid. And the Cybertronians being walking super computers would remember that and be able to apply it without any worry, especially on Barricade's part had he actually gotten the ointment from the medic.

"How'd you steal this from him, then?"

Barricade's ministrations ceased completely for a moment and Miles knew that he'd hit the mark.

"You may recall that I am a Decepticon," Barricade replied after a moment, his hands beginning to move once more.

"Asked some faceless uniform to get it for you, didn't you?"

"I think you need to be quiet for me to put this on."

Miles laughed, "But being right is making me feel so much better!"

Barricade gave a warning growl and the teen decided to keep his mouth shut for a bit. He appreciated how thoughtful it was of the 'con to do this, but he couldn't help but wonder if perhaps there was some other reasoning behind it. He decided not to ask; it was nice as it was and he didn't need to ruin it for himself by finding out that Barricade just really hated Ratchet or something stupid like that.

"This was so much better than a romantic dinner," Miles said when Barricade finished.

Barricade snorted, "You apologized first, this time."

"If there is anything you learn from me please let it be that 'you apologized first' is _not_ what you say when you want an argument to be over." Miles deadpanned.

"How about I was right, then?" Barricade asked in a tone that Miles couldn't place, and the teen sat up to stare at him. "You could have died."

Miles thought about retorting, but he knew it was true, and so he just sighed instead. He didn't think there was ever a time where he could have actually died, but he certainly could have came out of it a lot more hurt than he did if Prowl hadn't already been awake when Ravage had attacked him. Trailbreaker should have never given him the Allspark shard; he could only imagine that the mech was going to get a stern talking down by Ratchet for his mistake, although he hadn't seen any better courses of action at that moment.

"Yeah," Miles agreed and if it hadn't been over something so serious he might have enjoyed the momentary shock on Barricade's face. "You were right, but so was I. Maybe there was no more reason for me to go other then I just wanted to, but can't that be enough?"

"The Scout tortured me while you were away," Barricade said. Miles looked at him questioningly, unsure where he was trying to go with that. "Painted me pink while I slept and had a line of organics call me Rosie. There was a picnic, too. Hotdogs and hamburgers and then I stayed out with the Insect and your little friends and they ate marshmallows and we stargazed and it was altogether very sickening."

"I'm sorry I missed that," Miles replied with amusement.

And then he realized it was more honest then amused, because he was sorry that he had missed all of that. Bumblebee deciding he could mess with Barricade had to have been a hoot. A cook out and wasting the night away just talking with the four of them would have been something he knew he would have enjoyed. It also made him realize that small feeling of regret, the knowledge that he had missed out on good memories, was what Barricade had been aiming for.

"Look, I-"

"No," Barricade snarled, making Miles shut up instantly. This was a tone he recognized, a deep anger that was only slightly revealed in the tone of voice. "You have time yet to sell your soul to the Autodolts and your government. As of yet you owe them nothing. Enjoy your freedom while you still can."

It wasn't elegant, but it may have been the only way Barricade was comfortable with telling him to bask in his childhood. To not try and make himself worth something to the Autobots so they had a reason to keep him on base. He had a small moment of disorientation realizing he could actually piece that together from the backwards way of the 'con saying it—but it was smaller than the disorientation he had felt when he'd first realized that he could pick out facial expressions like happy or really angry, or when he started picking up anything but robotic and metallic from the voice. It had taken nearly two weeks for that to happen, but once it had he'd felt that they'd started to get on a lot better, that he had to guess less around him.

And he couldn't help but wonder if Bumblebee had tried to have a similar talk with Sam, though he doubted it would have been as backwards as Barricade was making it.

"I'm not fluent in Barry, yet." Miles told him, enjoying it when Barricade looked murderous. "But I think I got enough of that to translate it and agree with you."

Barricade glared, "As long as you stop being so stupid I could care less. I do have some responsibility for whether or not you get yourself killed, after all."

"Oh, is _that _why you tried to date me?" Miles teased, "And here you played it off as falling for Sideswipe's tricks!"

The teen laughed when Barricade growled and began to threaten him, deciding that perhaps the 'con really was right. After all, maybe he wouldn't have to worry about trying so hard to cement his own place on base to help the 'con out if he was becoming friends with the Scout.


	11. Chapter 10

Not long after Miles made it back to base relatively safe, he was sent right back to Tranquility so he could return to school and get caught up with anything he had missed. It was awkward keeping everything from his parents before, but with the constant reminder of his aching back and the thought that he might have stepped in too far to back out just as Barricade seemed to fear, it was so much worse now. He wanted nothing more than to walk up to his mother and hug her and maybe even cry into her shoulder. He had been scared, the most scared he'd been in his entire life, and though he'd done his best to act relatively normal afterwards it had left him off kilter and confused.

Barricade was still made to stay at the base, uncomplaining as ever about his situation there. He'd not gone far enough forward to really be trusted, but he'd managed to earn himself some mechs willing to at least talk to him, or in Bumblebee's case share an odd and tense kind of fledgeling friendship. It didn't matter too much because he, Sam, and Mikaela were still spending as much time at the base as they possibly could.

They were spending so much time there, in fact, that both teens realized around the same time and got upset by the fact that they really didn't know the new mechs yet. After a bit of debate they decided to tackle the scientist first, because he not only seemed the most friendly but he was also the only one they would be able to find alone. While talking to a mech with someone or somemech there was usually okay, it tended to be that the newer ones acted a bit differently around their own kind or around certain humans, so it was better for them to just walk the almost full mile to Wheeljack's lab.

According to Ratchet, the lab had been built about a mile away from the base for structural reasons; these reasons mainly being that it was a lot harder for the scientist to knock the whole of NEST flat when he had nothing near enough for him to do so. There wasn't much to actually see on the way there, but once they entered the human sized door there was a lot to look at. The main room seemed to be some sort of large computer set up. There were three large screens and a large panel coming off the wall that held rows upon rows of switches and buttons with Cybertronian symbols on them. On one wall there was multiple boxes stacked up with what looked like datapads inside of them.

Moving on, they exited into a long hallway that ended in a large set of double doors. Wheeljack was standing just in front of these double doors, entering a pass code into a keypad that was on the wall. Since the lab was made for Cybertronians the keypad was almost eight feet above either of their heads.

"Hey, Wheeljack," Sam called in greeting.

Wheeljack turned to look at them, "Oh, hello, little ones! And what brings you to my humble abode?"

"We wanted to actually get to know you," Sam replied with a grin. "Give you the human stamp of approval."

"Oh, that illusive reward?" Wheeljack asked with a small smile, "I hear Prowl's not even received it yet, I doubt I can be rewarded such an honor."

Miles laughed, "You're always busy, so we thought we'd come to you instead of vice versa to give you the chance."

"Joking aside, I do apologize for that." Wheeljack responded sincerely, "Prime has requested that I make a satellite to send the message he wants our faction to find far deeper into space than what yours can do."

"Is that what the nitroglycerin is for?" Sam asked slyly. Miles gave him a surprised and slightly confused glance, while Wheeljack just laughed.

"And how do you know of that?"

"The soldiers like me."

"Oh, I imagine so. Apparently you young organics are quite hard to dislike, be it by older organics or us mechs, hmm?" Wheeljack questioned lightly, though it was obvious he expected no answer. "Come on, then. I will show you."

The mech hit a last key on the key pad and three light beeps followed before the large doors in front of him slid open. The teens followed him as walked down a very large ramp, Sam having to jog a bit before the doors closed between them. The ramp itself bottomed out into a large room that seemed bigger than even the hangar that the mechs had claimed for recharge, parts of it partitioned off from others by thin gray walls. From the size of the room and the way the ramp went down it was obvious that it was stationed underground, probably as another measure to try and make sure that nothing Wheeljack-related was able to harm the base.

Wheeljack led them around one of the partitions into a smaller section of the large room that held a large black cylinder. The side of the cylinder facing them had a clear pane, and inside it could be seen that the cylinder itself had many parts to it. It reminded Miles of a Rube Goldberg machine, what with the way it was all connected and just waiting to start a chain reaction to produce whatever the scientist was looking for, but it seemed too over complicated. The scientist went behind the cylinder and did something that neither teen could see, which then caused a loud humming to start as things inside of it began to move.

"It's a very delicate process, making energon." Wheeljack informed them, "There are not similar enough materials on this planet of yours to replicate it entirely, but finding something better than what you humans use to power your vehicles is necessary as it is not quite right for us and has its drawbacks. Nitroglycerin is close to a component in energon that I haven't found anywhere else. This should create something similar enough to energon to give us proper, clean, energy that our bodies can accept better."

"Who's going to test it out?" Miles asked, sharing an amused look with Sam.

"Me, of course!"

"And if you don't respond to it well?"

Wheeljack chuckled, "Then I suppose a visit to Ratchet will be in order."

"You're signing your own death warrant," Sam pointed out with a grin, and Wheeljack grinned back good naturedly.

An odd clack came from inside the cylinder and Wheeljack turned to give it an alarmed look just as the humming started to increase in frequency. A small flash followed by a loud bang went off inside of the cylinder, quickly followed by another. There was a high pitched whine and a sizzling sound just before everything exploded.

* * *

Sam groaned as he slowly woke up, taking stock of everything. His mouth was dry, his skin felt raw and hot like he'd gotten a sunburn, and his head hurt a lot. He tried to swallow a few times to work up saliva in his mouth, but nothing seemed to help. He remembered quite well that something had started to go wrong with Wheeljack's invention, but he couldn't remember how he'd ended up injured, so he peeked his eyes open and looked around in confusion.

Above him was nothing but black metal and it took him a bit to figure out that it was actually Wheeljack's servo, his body curled to accommodate the appendage surrounding him. Sam turned on to his stomach and saw that there was an opening near his head between some of the scientist's digits and outside of it he could see Miles sitting against a wall, his eyes closed and head leaned against it.

"Miles..." Sam called, swallowing thickly as it rubbed at his throat wrong.

Miles' eyes flew open and the teen crawled the few feet from his spot over to Wheeljack's servo. "Sam! Thank God you're okay!"

"What happened?" Sam asked, "I know there was a bit of an explosion, but..."

"A fucking huge explosion," Miles corrected. "Wheeljack realized things weren't going to end well and protected us. I only really know that he shoved me down to the ground and suddenly there was a huge fucking hand surrounding me as I went death momentarily and then listened as things started to fall apart, but I assume he did it to you, too. He's really out of it."

Sam realized that it was more than likely Wheeljack's fault that his head hurt so bad. It wasn't a stretch to imagine that in his panic the scientist managed to knock him in the head while he tried to get him on the ground to protect him from the explosion, but he wasn't feeling exactly grateful to the mech while his head hurt as bad as it did.

"You can go get help now," Sam sighed.

"Actually..." Miles ran a hand through his hair in a clear show of nervousness, "We've kind of been caved in."

"You have got to be kidding me," Sam hissed.

He wiggled forward and tried to press through the opening, but quickly realized that his shoulders were too wide to make it. He turned his head about trying to look at the damage that Miles was indicating and realized he couldn't see it well on his stomach, though when he glanced up he could see clear cracks in the ceiling. He shimmied back inside of the space and quickly turned onto his back instead and stuck his head back out. He could now clearly see the cave in that Miles had mentioned. It was a scant few feet from where the scientist was lying unconscious, as far as he could tell. His position from mostly under the scientist's servo didn't actually give him a good way to imagine how the scientist lay.

"Do you have any idea what happened to Wheeljack?" Sam asked.

"Dents in his helm and rubble on the ground," Miles replied shortly.

So that meant that the scientist had probably been knocked out by falling pieces of the ceiling. Sam rested his head on the ground after peering at everything he could and let out another loud groan. He pulled out his phone and checked the time and was disappointed to see that it was only a bit after noon. He'd been out for about three hours according to his phone, and that whole time no one or mech had bothered to find them. He was even more disappointed to see that he was getting no signal. But it was only a matter of waiting. Bumblebee only ever allowed a few hours to pass by without checking up on him, and the Scout would know he wouldn't leave the base without telling him.

"Bumblebee and Ratchet are gonna have a field day," Sam muttered.

Miles snorted, "Oh, you mean that we're going to die pretty soon?"

"More like Wheeljack is."

Miles laughed, and the two fell silent. Sam shimmied back into the space under Wheeljack's servo again so he could roll back on to his stomach and then poked his head out once more so he could look at his friend properly. There was a small scratch on Miles' forehead that hadn't been there before, but otherwise he seemed entirely fine.

"We should do something fun," Sam suggested. "I'm getting angry just laying here."

"You mean depressed," Miles responded with a grin.

Sam sighed, not even all that upset that his friend knew him too well. "Bumblebee should have found me by now."

"Upset his Sam senses aren't tingling?"

"Fuck off."

Miles snickered, "Alright, something fun. Like what?"

Sam gave that some serious thought. There wasn't that many games he could remember that were done verbally, and though he had a few games on his phone it was almost dead and there wasn't any that Miles could join in on. Being stuck under Wheeljack's servo just made it harder to imagine actually doing something to lift his spirits.

"Well... long before you came on base Epps had this idea of making sexual innuendos around a Cybertronian's name, their occupation, or their alt mode of choice." Sam offered after a moment. He waited for Miles to nod before giving him a name, "Starscream first."

Miles laughed, "That's almost too easy. Stars cream? That sounds like a total porn name."

"He's a fighter jet, so for a good pick up line..." Sam deepened his voice, "Want to sit in my cockpit, baby?"

"Want to join the mile high club?" Miles countered.

Sam laughed, "Ohhh, that's a new one. What about Bumblebee, then? We couldn't come up with much for him."

"Hey, baby, can I put my stinger in you?" Miles waggled his eyebrows in a suggestive manner. "Be cause I can hardly wait to bee-in you."

"Oh, God, that's awful!" Sam snickered, "Barricade."

"I hear you get all these pesky fleshling admirers," Miles' deep growl wasn't actually that off from Barricade's own. "Let me barricade your entrance and I can guarantee that they won't get in."

"Don't worry, fleshling, I won't punish you _too_ hard." Sam offered, though he couldn't get his imitation anywhere close to Barricade's voice.

"Ratchet," Miles demanded with a grin.

"Naughty nurse Ratchet?" Sam asked innocently.

Miles burst into laughter at the image, and Sam quickly joined his friend. With the medic's bedside manner it was completely hilarious to imagine him trying to be gentle or even flirtatious. The sound of muffled talking reached them, followed by that of digging, and the two grinned at each other, knowing that they'd be saved soon.

Miles made a kissy face at Sam, batting his eyes. "Awe, I see your hurt, young Samuel. Should I kiss all your booboos better?"

"I'm not gonna be able to look him in the optics if you say stuff like that!"

"You don't need to look at his optics if you're taking in his needle." Miles waggled his eyebrows once more and Sam gave in and laughed. "But fine, no more Ratchet. It's hard to imagine that mech doing anything sexual related. Almost horrifying, really. What about boss 'bot, then?""He's the leader so overly dominating?" Sam suggested.

Miles looked like he was holding back tears, "Bondage! Tying all his interface partners up!"

"And lets not forget Prowl. He's more of a hard ass then Ironhide. He'd be the bitch!"

"Pfft, begging to be punished and saying he's been a bad boy!" Miles laughed.

"And then Ironhide. Something with guns…" Sam started, looking at Miles.

"'Hey baby, check out these guns!" They blurted in unison, falling into hysterics once more.

Over the next hour as they were dug out the two would come up with many more things to make each other laugh. By the time Bumblebee's holoform could get inside the room they were laughing so hard that the mech feared there was something in the air and that they needed immediate medical attention. He called for Ratchet to form a holoform and look them over but that just made them laugh harder.

* * *

After 'the incident', as the lab explosion had come to be called, Prowl got out the rule book and wrote two new ones. One was that Sam and Miles were allowed no where near the lab any longer; the second was that any human who wished to visit the lab for whatever reason, unless they were Sam or Miles, needed to have a Cybertronian—preferably one with thick armor like Ironhide or the twins—escorting them. Neither of the teens protested being banned from returning to the lab, both having been made to suffer through a nearly two hour long rant from Ratchet about stupid mistakes and how they could have been killed. Sam had been checked over thoroughly and outside of a large bruise on his forehead the teen wasn't any worse for wear.

In punishment, both had been returned home for the weekend, and Miles was now currently at the lake with his large Mastiff, Mason. In part it was so he could escape his house and in lieu of the base it seemed to work. The teen wasn't sure how his mother always knew when his world went off kilter, like she had seemed to know when he'd first met Barricade, but it was obvious he was worrying her and it pained him to do so. His mother made it clear that she knew something had happened, but not what, and there was endless questions.

Miles groaned, flinging a stick hard into the lake. He had jogged the entire way there to try and work off some of the anxious feeling that was inside of him, and it had worked, some. And seeing his loyal dog soaking wet, tail wagging like mad as he dived into the lake once more, helped to assuage the rest as long as he didn't think about all the things he so desperately wanted to.

But both the boy and the dog were surprised when a cop car pulled up; Mason forgoing his stick entirely at the prospect of a friendly stranger and running right past his owner to go and sniff at the car. Miles, however, already knew the police cruiser quite well and knew that no human would be stepping out of it for his dog to greet.

"Barry?" Miles asked, confusion evident in his voice as he walked towards the Cybertronian and his dog. "I thought they were still keeping you on a short leash?"

"Captain Lennox has something he wishes to talk to you and Ladiesman217 about," Barricade replied, the 'con shiftings on his shocks away from Mason. "I was given permission by the Prime to retrieve you while the Insect gets his favored human. Hop in, we're going straight there."

The teen was almost surprised that Optimus had actually shown such trust in him, but then he realized he hadn't. Bumblebee was close enough to keep an optic on Barricade since they were both right in Tranquility. Most likely both had thought that the 'con would be going no farther than Miles' house, only about five miles away from Sam's. But Miles hadn't been there and Barricade apparently remembered where he liked to go when he wanted to think, except this was probably much farther away from Bumblebee than Optimus had intended Barricade to be, because even the teen knew that the Scout could no longer keep a tab on the Decepticon when he was this far away.

"Mason has to come too, then. Knowing how base is I won't make it back home 'till late Sunday or something, if I even make it to school on Monday, and my parents are about to leave for the weekend." Miles explained.

"That… _thing_ is not getting inside of me. It is wet and muddy, and has claws." Barricade growled, revving his engine and scaring Mason enough get the Mastiff to back up towards his owner.

"He is coming or I'm not, and that's that." Miles replied, hands on his hips to accentuate his point. He decided to ignore the fact that anyone who might wander close enough would probably think him crazy, glaring at a cop car like he was.

Barricade snarled, contemplating just leaving before deciding against it. "If he does anything inside of me it will be _you_ I do things to as I see fit."

"Fine, fine," Miles laughed. "Whatever you say."

The teen had to spend a couple of minutes coaxing the Mastiff towards Barricade's frame, but once he got there the dog willingly jumped in the backseat. It seemed that Mason had been just as spooked by a talking car with no human inside of it as Miles had been when he'd first met Barricade. Miles knew instantly that it was a terrible idea when he could already see the Mastiff leaving noticeable paw prints on the interior, but the mech said nothing and the teen didn't want to chance bringing it up if he hadn't noticed. So Miles climbed in the driver's seat, buckling up and pretending to drive automatically.

He said nothing when Mason left muddy paw prints on one of the back windows, though Barricade let out a small annoyed sound. He cringed when Mason did a full body shake, spraying water over most of the things in the vehicle, but still Barricade endured. It wasn't until he had started to notice the 'potty behavior', as his parents deemed it, that he began to get really worried. The drive to the NEST base was about two hours if it was a normal car or the Cybertronian was obeying the laws, and Barricade seemed to be all set for mostly obeying them on this particular day. He supposed it was because this was the first time Barricade had been let off the base, but either way he wished that it wasn't so. They were almost to the NEST base when Miles knew Mason couldn't hold it anymore and he desperately tried to get the Decepticon Neutral to pull over. Barricade had refused, believing that the animal could hold it for just a few minutes more.

The teen tried to hope that maybe he could. He could see the first few hangars of the base, along with the bright canary yellow of Bumblebee's alt mode. It seemed like only a few seconds passed before they were pulling into the base, Bumblebee shifting into bipedal mode just a few feet from them when Barricade slammed to a screeching halt in the middle of the tarmac, sending the teen forward and almost banging him off the steering wheel. And he knew then that he was doomed.

"No, Mason, no!" he cried, turning to glare at his dog, who just wagged his tail in return.

Sam and Bumblebee walked over to Barricade then and the teen stopped outside the driver's window and tapped on it, ready to ask just what was going on. When it rolled down he peered inside, noticing Mason in the back and Barricade's interior covered in muddy paw prints. Next to the Mastiff was a large wet spot; taking in Miles' paler than normal face he made the correct assumption and just let the large dog out of Barricade's backseat quickly. Miles tried to unbuckle his seat belt, but found it stuck fast.

"Barry, can you, uh, unbuckle me?" He asked softly, not receiving a reply. "Barricade…?"

"No, Miles." Barricade snarled, his engine roaring back to life as the back door slammed shut. His entire frame seemed to be shaking; the teen feared that it was in anger and not amusement. "You are not going anywhere."

Miles looked at Sam with wide eyes, clawing at the seat belt. He stopped when he felt it tighten around him, pressing him firmly against the seat.

"Don't worry, fleshling." Sam drawled in a low, husky tone as he leaned in the window so that Miles could hear him. "I won't punish you... _too_ hard, anyway."

"Oh God," Miles gasped, flushing even more as he was torn between mild amusement and staying horrified at what was going to happen to him. "I seriously, seriously, hate you! Save me!"

Sam laughed, patting Barricade's hood. "Just try to bring a piece of him back for his parents, Cade."

Sam was pinned with Miles' best betrayed look, but Barricade's window rolled up too quickly for him to hear whatever his friend was going to say. He put on a grin and just waved cheerfully as the 'con quickly did a u-turn and tore out of the NEST base like Megatron himself was after him. He turned around, spotting Bumblebee's holoform out and petting Mason and he walked over to them. Bumblebee watched as Barricade left with Miles, slowly playing the Funeral March as he looked back down at Sam.

"Yeah, Bee, he's a goner." Sam replied, trying not to laugh as he bent down and petted the Mastiff.

* * *

Prowl watched the whole scene as Barricade returned to the NEST base with Civilian Miles Lancaster, standing in his Prime's office as the two looked out of the window. He was surprised when an animal, a dog like Mojo, had gotten out of the Decepticon Neutral once the back door had opened. This one was fairly bigger than the tiny Chihuahua; a quick search on the internet informed him the breed was referred to as a Mastiff. It was clear something unpleasant had happened and he watched with some amusement as Miles tried to escape from Barricade, only to be kept inside as the 'con turned around and left the way he had came.

"I am still amazed by how quickly we have adapted to a 'con in our midst," Prowl said softly. "Neutral or not."

"I believe that is in part do to Miles." Optimus replied, just as amused as his SIC was by the show they were inadvertently given. "He felt strongly over Barricade's fate even the first day he was brought here. A human who would put unflinching trust in a Cybertronian tends to mean that the Cybertronian has deserved it, for whatever reason."

"And the other part?" Prowl asked, watching as Sam and Bumblebee stayed at that spot, Sam playing with the Mastiff.

"This war has been going on far too long." The Prime stated simply, "Both sides are getting low on mechs and femmes. There is not a single one of us who didn't know someone on the opposite side and have some kind of positive feelings for them. The Allspark and Megatron are gone, there is no need to continue to fight when our planet and the reason for fighting are as dead as the Decepticon leader himself."

"Surely we should keep a close eye on him?"

"Of course we keep a watchful eye on the new comer, but why act rude if we are given no cause to?" Optimus asked with amusement, "As of yet there is no reason to think that we should mistrust him. He poses no threat to us how he is now. Barricade's decision to become neutral towards us, while it still may have happened eventually, was greatly influenced by Miles. In fact, I am almost certain that if he had not had Miles' influence then this would most likely never have come to fruition. I doubt that Barricade would have moved against on his own, but we may have actually killed him, or he may eventually have joined back up with other Decepticons. But as it is now Bumblebee has come to have a sort of friendship with him, however odd it may appear to us now. Ironhide, too, has seemed to accept him. I find I am looking forward to what more may happen."

Prowl gave that some thought for a moment, going over what he knew of Miles and Barricade. The two had certainly become a sensation on base, helped by the teen's close friendship with Sam. That meant Sam and Bumblebee were naturally supportive of them and those two were a powerful duo that few would mess with, Bumblebee because of his well liked position among all the mechs even though he had no real important title to speak of and Sam because of his hand in destroying Megatron. And Epps and Will had quickly warmed to the new teen as well, though what they thought of the 'con Prowl didn't pretend to know.

"To sum it up: the humans of this planet are more than meets the optic?" Prowl asked dryly, although an unusual amount of amusement peppered his normally monotone voice.

Optimus chuckled, "That they are. They are similar to us in many ways. Emotions, some motivations. We are much bigger and tend to contain a lot more metal, while they are fragile and have skin that can be broken by paper, but our general frames are the same. A head, two arms, two hands, two legs, things to stand on. We occasionally come with wings, but humans invented that stuff on their own. They have a shockingly short lifespan, but get a lot done in the time given to them. They adapt quickly."

Prowl nodded, though he couldn't help but wonder if the Prime was trying to sell the idea of the organics to him. He knew it was no secret that he didn't much see the point of them outside of a stepping stone, but he was doing his best to become more respectful and understanding towards them. His slip up in Oklahama had been embarrassing for him when he had realized it later, and he'd gotten the cold shoulder from Ironhide and the Captain both ever since. And while he didn't much care about the Captain's ire he did care about what his Cybertronians thought of him.

But, in a way, Optimus did have a point. He had been told of how readily Civilians Mikaela Banes and Samual Witwicky had adjusted to the whole thing. How Sam had stepped up in Mission City and excepted the Allspark cube from an injured Bumblebee; then ran from Megatron with it only to use it to offline the significantly larger being. From what he had heard Civilian Miles Lancaster had, supposedly, barely bat an eyelash when he found out that the Saleen Police Cruiser he had been working on was alive. And the actual databurst he'd been sent from Bumblebee about the teen's reaction and anger to Ironhide beating Barricade up and the subsequent incident where he threw roses in the Weapo Specialists' faceplates had been rather enlightening about how close the organic and 'con were.

He could only deem both Miles and Sam lacking in logic. Humans themselves were dictated too much by emotion for Prowl's taste, but he knew better than to say such a thing. Instead thought about mentioned that it seemed that all the humans that could be accepting of Cybertronians were set apart somehow, but for the life of him he couldn't figure a nice way to refer to it besides what the humans deem insanity and that they would be the insane. He told his Prime as much.

"Ah, yes. Some would call them that. But I think all the 'bots under my care could have a few questionable… thought processes. Myself included, I suppose." Optimus replied, amusement evident in his tone. "The NEST members themselves, even the civilians on this base, I believe would take no offense to being called insane."

"Some of them may even take it as a compliment. Like Civilian Miles Lancaster, Sergeant Robert Epps, and Jazz." He said in agreement, turning his optics to focus back on to his leader.

"They'll get you to call them by their non-formal names, eventually, Prowl. Even Barricade refers to some of them that way. You may as well just give in before you become a target." Optimus said lightly, picking up a data pad to read it's contents.

"It's too late for that, I'm afraid." He stated dryly. "Jazz had them out for me since he was onlined."

"Young Samuel believes that Miles enjoys tormenting Cybertronians with cop car alt modes, for some reason." Optimus replied, trying to hide his amusement now. "Perhaps if you find out why it can be put to a stop. For you, anyway."

"Just give Miles to the rest of the Decepticons and somehow make it so they couldn't kill him or get rid of him." It was a rare moment that Prowl actually smiled and cracked a joke, rarer still around his Prime, but he knew his leader appreciated it when he did. "They'll offline themselves."

Optimus laughed, Prowl returning his attention out of the window. He watched as Sam found a stray stick, from where he wasn't sure, and played fetch with the dog. He took a minute to comm Bumblebee and find out what had happened between Barricade, the dog, and Miles. When the Autobot Scout answered him he let out a snort without meaning to. Glancing back at Optimus he found his leader's questioning gaze on him and decided to answer it.

"I asked Bumblebee and it appears as if the Mastiff, Mason according to Civilian Samuel Witwicky, lubricated inside of Barricade, on his back seat. It is unknown where he has taken Miles or for what purpose." Prowl answered the unasked question.

Optimus vented slightly, the Cybertronian version of a sigh, though whether from annoyance or amusement Prowl couldn't tell. "I believe Samuel would say he is doomed, then."

Prowl could only nod in agreement.

* * *

Barricade and Miles returned to base a little over an hour after the 'con had rushed out of it. This made it evident to nearly everyone who hadn't realized it before that Barricade really was more whipped then they could have possibly thought, what with Miles getting out of his interior with such a happy grin, walking over to his dog and Sam without any hesitation or fear in his eyes. Then again, after they considered it was Miles that Barricade had been going up against, no one was too surprised when he came back in one piece. The Cybertronian himself seemed just a little grouchier than normal if the scowl that was permanently etched on the holoform's face was anything to go by.

Most of NEST was outside for the afternoon, Sarah's impromptu cookout a week or so before having been a big enough hit to cause repeats. All of the Autobots out to share in the lunch with the soldiers were in their holoforms, their alt modes never far away from them. Sam was sitting at a table with Will, Epps, Fig, Bumblebee, Ironhide, Jazz, and Prowl; Mason lay at the Captain's feet contentedly. They continued their conversations even as Miles went up to Sam, Barricade just going and sitting at the end of the table.

Miles grinned at Sam, "Back in one piece and mentally stable. I think that's a personal best, considering who I was going against."

"Well, as long as you didn't mention that Mason could have been marking Barricade as his territory and showing his dominance over him, I'm not surprised." Sam stated innocently, a smirk on his features.

The table fell in to a shocked silence at that as they watched Barricade's hands visibly twitch as if wanting to do something with them even in his holoform, the grin disappearing off of Miles' face. Will put a hand on Mason's collar to make sure the Mastiff stayed in one place, Bumblebee keeping a wary eye on Barricade.

"You were either a Decepticon in a past life, or I did something to deserve this." Miles accused softly, "Which is it?"

"Mikaela let slip that the two of you were planning a nice little surprise for me involving Halloween," Sam replied, "And I decided I needed to get my hits in on you while I still can if you've got my girlfriend on your side."

Epps started to laugh at that, "If nothing else, the kid is smart. Might get his friend killed, but smart none the less!"

The rest of the table couldn't help but silently agree with the Sergeant, Miles turning to face Barricade with a brave face.

"I know the potty signs, he wasn't just marking his territory." Miles told the 'con, "If he really wanted to show dominance he'd mount you or hump you."

Ironhide snorted, "That's supposed to make him feel better? I'd be pissed if someone let vermin lubricate inside of me, too!"

"Not helping, Hide!" Will hissed at his Guardian.

Miles glared at Ironhide for a brief moment before returning his attention to Barricade. The table watched on in amusement as the teen just managed to pull off an apologetic yet hurt kind of look, while Barricade went from glowering, to glaring, to straight out growling as he gestured angrily at the wash racks. Miles just nodded, half the table inclined to believe that he'd just sold his soul to the devil while the other half didn't think that the Decepticon Neutral would let it slide that easily. Either way, Barricade seemed to back down first, returning to his usual scowl.

"Squishy organic on the outside," Epps started as he threw an arm around Miles' shoulders, "completely stupid on the inside."

"So what's the big bad havin' ya do, Miles?" Jazz asked, an amused grin on his face.

"A few complete cleanings. Inside, outside. Waxing, untwisting or unkinking any wires that need it." Miles replied, giving Epps the darkest look he could manage. Then Barricade cleared his throat and the teen glanced around the picnic bench almost hesitantly, "Oh, and I kind of promised to make sure he could get off base more, if not with me then with Sam and Bumblebee. One of you should tell boss 'bot that."

Everyone heard Prowl make a clearly audible sound, but none of them could quite figure out what it was. The SIC's holoform stood up from the table in his anger.

"You can not just say it and it is done, Civilian Miles Lancaster!" Prowl snapped, "You do not have the clearance!"

"Well, Ah think he did, Prowler. If ya want to take tha' up with Barry-" Jazz pointedly ignored the snarl that the 'con gave at the use of his nickname. The only one who could call the 'con Barry without getting their heads verbally torn off or snarled at was Miles. "-ya can do so yourself. Ah doubt if Miles asked that Optimus would actually disagree, an' Ah think it would be better for 'im as well."

"Optimus did suggest, however jokingly, that Miles could be the liaison between us and Barricade." Bumblebee cut in, amusement evident in his voice. "Miles replied only under the designation 'Flower Power', but either way that is theoretically letting him pull rank there."

Ironhide snorted once again, "If he had actually been given that rank, then theoretically yes."

"Ironhide is right," Prowl retorted, "Theoretical rankings have no basis here."

"Ask Optimus wha' 'e thinks, then, man." Jazz said, giving Prowl a pointed look that didn't allow the SIC to argue with him.

Prowl stayed silent for a moment as he did just that, sighing heavily and slumping back down into his seat as Optimus responded quite positively to that idea. Everyone took the Tactician's defeated slump as acquiescence, Barricade looking smug.

"Can we know why you wanted us here, Will?" Miles asked, trying to effectively change the subject.

"Invitation to the first annual NEST Halloween party." Will said quickly, more than ready to help the teen get the conversation turned around if it kept Prowl from becoming angry again.

Both Miles and Sam were silent for a moment as they just stared at the Captain, but that was broken by Sam starting to laugh. Miles gave Will a slightly angry, but mostly incredulous, look.

"Seriously?" Miles asked in an exasperated tone, "You put me and Barry through all that just for something you could have invited me to over email?"

Sam put a comforting hand on Miles shoulder, "Don't worry, Bee and me will drive Mason home!"

"You'll tell me before he lubricates in me, right?" Bumblebee asked, sounding slightly disgruntled.

"Course, Bee." Sam laughed, "I know the signs as well as Miles does. Hopefully you'll be smarter than Barricade and actually listen, though."

Bumblebee looked marginally relieved, while Barricade just glared at Sam. The soldiers got up to get in line at a grill to receive their lunch, Sam taking the opportunity to grab Miles and drag him away from the table to a more private location. This had to be rather far away, considering that the Cybertronians had better hearing than the humans.

"So, what's really going to happen to you?" Sam asked, grinning.

Miles groaned, "Ugh, I should have known you'd know me too well. I think it'll be kind of like how you're doing it in preparation of what me 'n Mikky are gonna put you through, but he'll probably play the unpredictable 'con card just to have me on my toes."

"Mind fucking you?" Sam summarized.

"Pretty much," Miles replied dryly, "Make me paranoid with odd behavior but never do anything that could constitute as outright payback for awhile, even though I did tell him to pull the frag over so Mason could use the restroom. But did he listen? No."

Sam laughed, "Damned if you do, damned if you don't with him."


	12. Chapter 11

**AN:** Still not even sorry for cat!Miles

* * *

It was rare for Captain William Lennox to ever be able to fully relax on the NEST base. Between paper work, overly annoying and stuffy governmental officials, and just trying to juggle all the Cybertronian's and their different temperaments, he had to find a place to himself where he could relax. He was as close to peaceful as he could ever get out on the firing range with a weapon in his hand; that happened to be why he was already heading out to the range, figuring it was a bit too late for anyone to be out in it.

Most of the base was off scheming or decorating for Halloween—which really meant that the Autobot twins were scheming and or decorating for Halloween—and it gave him just long enough to enjoy whatever small peace he could get from it. With all of the civilians in Tranquility it meant that it would be a pretty quiet night, something he was more than looking forward to.

During his walk to the firing range he couldn't help but look around and think of how he had ended up there, in this odd little place with his brothers and sisters in arms. Perhaps maybe none of them deserved the title of completely sane—they couldn't have lived through what they did or decided to come to NEST if that was the case—but they were brave, war hardened military trained personnel that were only occasionally impulsive and reckless. He had even began to see the civilians, like Maggie, Sam, and them, as his men; they could be just as insane and impulsive as his actual soldiers.

Will thought that they probably had the right to be a bit insane, since they were all dealing with the same giant metallic beings from outer space. Any normal person should've turned in the opposite direction and gone screaming for the hills. But he was happy to see the human NEST members getting so excited over sharing a holiday with the Cybertronians, helped by a few of the Autobots actually showing interest in participating in Earth culture and various holidays. Between the base being constructed and all the governmental mumbo-jumbo loops the Autobots had to have jumped through to get it constructed in the first place they never really got to celebrate their first ones.

It was the new start for them on Earth here; Halloween and the teenagers were leading the way, somehow. Many Halloween supplies had been brought into between the teens, Sam's parents, Epps, and some of the Autobots. From fake blood and make up supplies to streamers and decorations to nearly a garbage truck load of pumpkins. He knew his wife was personally trying to work on a way with Ratchet to safely make some kind of costume that could by Cybertronian sized, one that wouldn't get caught in armor or hinder any subsequent transformations. If Halloween was anything to go by he'd hate to see Thanksgiving come. He'd almost fear a bunch of turkeys running around, but he quickly pushed that thought out of his head. Ironhide would shoot them all before they got even remotely annoying to Will.

Entering the firing range he pushed away his stray thoughts and focused on the two people already inside of it.

"I'm surprised one of you aren't causing any trouble," Will remarked casually as he strolled in and grabbed his fire arm of choice.

Epps and Jazz were the only two inside the shooting range. The Sergeant was just behind the holoform, moving his arm and straightening his back posture. Will could see a shotgun in Jazz's hands, he could only guess at why the Autobot was interested in learning how to use human weapons, though he couldn't think of any reason that was particularly good. The two had set up closer targets for the use of the shotgun, boxes with empty soda cans on them.

"Tha' hurts, William. Righ' near mah spark, it does." Jazz replied, never taking his eyes off the target even as Epps instructed him to change his grip slightly.

"Yes, well I still happen to see you the lesser of two evils." Will told him, turning narrowed eyes on his Sergeant. "The greater one hasn't denied any accusations."

Epps chuckled, "Ironically enough I am contemplating going as Satan."

"And I'm going as a fraggin' banana, big deal." Will replied, "You've been quiet the past two days. What are you up to?"

Epps said nothing, stepping back from Jazz. The Saboteur glanced back at him once to make sure he looked alright, taking Epps' nod as a go ahead. Both the Sergeant and the Captain covered their ears as he fired a shot and hit the first can, pumping it before going again. It didn't take long before all the cans were knocked off the boxes and Jazz was looking satisfied.

"How deep of a recharge does Ironhide go into?" Epps asked, moving out into the range and collecting the now ruined cans and grabbing a few of the boxes while he was at it.

"Why?" Will asked in return. The Captain wasn't willing to relinquish any information until he knew why and decided losing his life over it might be worth it.

"We wan' ta make Hide a Jack-o-lantern." Jazz explained, moving closer and taking the gun Will had grabbed from him. "An' possibly remove the ammunition of his cannons and replace 'em with…"

Here Jazz trailed off, looking to Epps for the right words.

"Pumpkin guts. That way if he shoots it won't hurt that much," Epps clarified, grinning at Will.

Will considered it a moment, weighing the pros and cons in his head separately. After about a minute he told Epps what he wanted to know, as long as he would be getting pictures of it or at least able to help with the cannons. He might not be able to work them even if he had them, but he could still respect a powerful weapon when he saw it. While shoving the inside of pumpkin guts inside of said weapons might not seem like respect, it would get him a closer view while said cannons were inactivated for once.

* * *

"So… Why did Samuel, Mrs. Witwicky, and Mikaela go into that..." Bumblebee paused, searching for the word but coming up with a blank. "That whatever it is, again?"

Miles grinned, leaning back in his seat as he looked at the day spa that Sam, Judy, and Mikaela had gone into. It paid to be someone's best friend since elementary school; a lot of dirt ended up collecting over the years and blackmail was such a small price to pay to get what he wanted. It was even better that Mikaela was in on it too, begging Sam to get his legs waxed with her.

He almost wished he had gone in to watch, but the fear that he could have been dragged into it somehow left him sitting safely inside of Bumblebee. He'd been curious once long ago and had an older female friend show him what it felt like. He never planned on it happening again.

"It's called a spa, Bee." He explained, "A place where people go to get… tune ups, I guess. You should really google it, I've never been to one. I just know you can get waxes there, but not the kind you would get. It removes body hair. That's what Sam's getting."

"I still don't think I understand why you are doing this to him. He seems to dislike it." Bumblebee replied.

"Well, he doesn't like it right now. After it's all done in like ten years he'll laugh at it." Miles shrugged, "But this also means he'll be able to get back at me which he's been looking forward to forever."

Bumblebee sat silently for a moment as he thought that over. "Does he have no ground substance on you?"

"It's dirt, Bee." Miles snickered, "And no. Nothing that I wouldn't willingly tell other people. Sam, however, has many things he doesn't want his parents to know."

"Like what?"

Miles glanced at the symbol in the middle of the steering wheel, "Let me amend that statement a bit. Sam has many things he doesn't want his parents, or _you_, to know."

Bumblebee let out a displeased sound at that, but Miles kept his mouth shut. It was all well and good to threaten Sam with the telling of his secrets, he just never actually intended to betray him in that manner. The Scout knew better than to ask him to spill, too.

"So why does Sam need his legs waxed, and not Mikaela?" The Cybertronian asked, sinking on his wheels a bit.

"It's a sex role thing. Here at least most men don't shave. Some swimmers do, but otherwise not that much. Women are expected to, though." Miles stretched out his legs a bit, "If you ask me it's stupid, but that's the way it is. Waxing is one of the more… painful ways to do it."

There was only static for a moment before Bumblebee found the song he wanted. "__Do you really want to hurt me? Do you really want to make me cry?"__

"Oh, don't you use that against me!" Miles laughed, smacking Bumblebee's steering wheel lightly. "You just sparred with Prowl not even two days ago. Waxing may hurt but I guarantee it hurts a lot less than that."

Bumblebee replied by playing a raspberry on his radio, prompting Miles to laugh more.

"What are Sam's and Mikaela's costumes going to be?" The Scout asked.

"Look up Mr. Taxi by SNSD on youtube, the dance version. The shorts version, not the skirt. I think the first girl who starts it off works fine for that. Just remove any white and black stripes and the outfits are good. Mikaela might have something in her hair, but whatever."

"So they'll be matching…" Bumblebee tried to puzzle it out, but quickly gave up. "What will they be, exactly?"

"Cheerleaders, supporters, mascots. Whichever is more appropriate." Miles replied, grinning. "For you."

He could feel it as Bumblebee laughed, his entire frame shaking slightly. The Autobot stayed silent for awhile, and Miles left him to whatever he may be thinking. He figured he was imagining Sam and Mikaela in those outfits or watching the actual video. Personally, he just couldn't wait to see how Sam would act while wearing an outfit like that.

"Sam told me that you would be wearing a naughty police uniform for Barricade." Bumblebee told him, "Though I think a naughty prisoner uniform would work better for you, and then Barricade could wear the police uniform."

"No, just no. I don't even know what I'm go-" He started to say but was cut off by someone contacting Bumblebee.

Miles figured it must have been a private comm, because the Scout's radio gave nothing but static for a minute before he could enable it so that the teen could hear as well.

"-wl to Bumblebee. New Autobot has arrived, designation currently unknown."

It took a minute for Miles to recognize Prowl's monotone voice, expecting something more to be said, but that was all that came through. He'd either ended it like that or Bumblebee hadn't thought it necessary to share. Bumblebee started his engine, and the seat belt slid around Miles to securely click into place. The Autobot pulled out of the parking space quickly, and raced out of the parking lot.

"I'm just going to assume we're going, then." Miles remarked dryly, adjusting the seat belt around him. "And that I'm coming along."

Bumblebee laughed, "I'll contact Ronald and he'll be there in time to pick them up. This will give you the perfect opportunity to meet one of us right off the bat. By the time the 'bot gets to base they'll probably know English."

"Think we should take videos for blackmail later?" Miles asked.

Bumblebee snorted, tuning his radio to a station he knew Sam and Miles liked. They made the rest of the trip to base in relative silence as Miles texted Sam and Mikaela what was going on, Bumblebee calling Ron. They made some small talk, mainly about who Bumblebee thought the Autobot might be and Miles texted everyone at base that he could human wise, even Maggie, to see, but either they didn't know or it was a surprise. This only prompted Bumblebee to speed up and break a few laws to get there faster. Miles pretended not to notice.

When they got past the gates they were greeted by Prowl. Bumblebee could feel it as Prowl scanned him, knowing that he was likely being checked for how many humans he'd decided to bring along.

"Hello Bumblebee, civilian Samual Witwicky." Prowl said in greeting. He obviously had done a very basic scan on Bumblebee, and had assumed that it was Sam inside.

Miles smirked, rolling down Bee's window. "Sorry, Prowlie, it's your worst nightmare."

"Cybertronians do not dream, civilian Miles Lancaster." Prowl replied, optics narrowing, before sliding away from the teen. "It's Data Courier Blurr, Bumblebee."

"Data Courier? Translate that to stupid English, please?" Miles asked.

Bumblebee laughed, "Basically a messenger, Miles. He's… fast. In everything he does."

Bumblebee did a quick scan of the area and located where Blurr was. He drove there quickly, stopping not too far away from the new to Earth Cybertronian and the Frontliner who was talking to him to let Miles unbuckle and get out. Once the teen did that he transformed.

"Bumblebee, have you scrambled your processor by any chance?" Ratchet asked, glaring at Bumblebee as he came over.

The Scout knew what he was worried about, he just didn't think Ratchet should bother worrying about it. As new as Blurr was he could potentially hurt a human.

"I'm sure it'll be fine. Blurr knows better than to squish anything." Bumblebee replied, waving dismissively at Ratchet. A human gesture that he had picked up, but by now almost all of them had picked up a few.

"He hasn't met any of the humans yet, and you know how excited Blurr can get." Ratchet said.

"Sunstreaker's with them," Bumblebee replied. "Besides, didn't you want to check out my vocalisor?"

Miles made his way to Blurr while Ratchet and Bumblebee disappeared behind a building. The mech was varying shades of blue, but the teen couldn't tell what kind of alt mode he would transform down into. All he could see was that the mech was very slim, seeming to be built for speed.

"Hi, I'm Mi-Woah!" He was startled when Blurr quickly picked him up and moved him closer for examination. "Hey, we do not man handle the squishy! Especially not without consent before hand! Put me down!"

"Amazing-is-it-a-pet?" Blurr asked, directing his question towards Sunstreaker.

"Who are you calling a pet you overgrown scrap heap?" Miles huffed, squirming in Blurr's grip as he tried to free his arms. "Put me down you aft!"

"It-has-adopted-some-of-our-words. Mi-Woah-is-cute." Blurr said, poking gently at Miles' head.

Sunstreaker sighed, sounding almost bored. "His name is Miles, Blurr. He was surprised when you picked him up, and it caused him to exclaim something while cutting off his name. He is a human, and no they are not pets. They are strong beings that even managed to take down a few 'cons."

"These-things-have-taken-down-Decepticons? Impossible!" Blurr exclaimed.

"They have. This one, Miles, befriended Barricade before he became the Decepticon Neutral we were telling you about." The warrior stated, "We'll fill you in more later with the data."

"It-Wait,-I-mean-he,-befriended-Barricade? These-things-are-glitched-in-their-processors-Sunstreaker! And-they're-our-allies?" Blurr asked, clearly confused.

As Sunstreaker tried to explain things to Blurr, Miles quickly found out that even giant alien robots could talk with their hands. And with how fast Blurr talked, he was quickly regretting ever having stepped foot near the 'bot.

He'd heard Ratchet voice his concerns and Bumblebee brush him off. Now he wished that they had stayed to watch him. It seemed that Sunstreaker was set to leave him there; he couldn't help but wonder if it was payback for what he, Ironhide, and Barricade had done to him nearly a month ago. It felt like he was on the worst kind of theme park ride. He was dizzy, felt nauseous, and was pretty sure he had at least a bit of whiplash from the way his neck was burning. He closed his eyes to see if that would help at all.

Miles was thankful when Blurr's hand suddenly stopped in mid swing, but he could feel the 'bot tense, grip tightening, and opened his eyes to see why. He quickly regretted that as his vision decided not to work like it normally should, the world deciding to spin for a moment.

"Let him go, Autobot." He heard Barricade snarl, "These organics are delicate. You could damage him."

He wasn't sure when Barricade had gotten there, but he was beyond thankful to the 'con at that moment.

"And-why-should-I-listen-to-you,-'con?" Blurr retorted, glaring at the Decepticon who had dared to touch him.

"He's right, Blurr." Ratchet's voice broke in, letting Miles know he was saved. "Give Miles to Barricade. Sunstreaker, I think we need to have a talk."

Miles was more than happy when Blurr did so, albeit reluctantly. He was dropped into Barricade's servo; he would have toppled right over if it hadn't been for the 'con pressing a clawed finger gently but firmly against his back to keep him up right.

"Thanks a lot, Barry." Miles said gratefully, leaning against Barricade's finger as his world finally went about righting itself again and he was actually able to open his eyes without feeling like he was about to be sick.

"I waited a bit just to see if you would puke on him," Barricade told him, walking away from the other Cybertronians and towards the rest of the base.

Miles gave a weak snort, "Oh that's wonderful. It's a newcomer, lets hand them a human so they can get organic digestive track liquid all over them! Haha, so funny."

"I thought so."

Miles could practically hear the smirk in Barricade's voice. The teen stayed silent for a moment, enjoying the free ride as he relaxed against the 'con. Base looked a bit different from this high up.

"And have you decided what you're going to be for Halloween?" Miles asked after a moment.

"A police officer." Barricade stated, "You could be my prisoner."

"Fat chance," Miles laughed, "That would make too many people happy. And you're so lame, Barry! Your default holoform has a police uniform on it."

"And what are you going as?" The 'con asked.

"Uhm… I dunno." Miles shrugged, "A bed sheet ghost, probably."

"And you call me lame?" Barricade snorted, walking in to the main hangar where a few mechs were gathered.

"Well, fine, maybe I'll get Wheeljack to help me with my costume!" Miles replied flippantly, "At least then it'll be the coolest one at the party."

"Really?" An excited voice rang out.

Miles looked up to see Wheeljack just over to their side, obviously having heard what he'd said. He could feel it as Barricade chuckled at his misfortune.

"Uh, yeah, Jack..." Miles said hesitantly, the scientist not seeming to pick up on it. "You should totally help me with my costume."

"Excellent!" Wheeljack exclaimed happily, "I'll get to work immediately!"

"My big mouth…" Miles muttered, looking back up at the 'con. "At least if it explodes I won't need any makeup to look like I'm wounded, cuz I really will be."

* * *

Miles was annoyed. The sun didn't even look like it was coming up yet, but he had already been woken up by Barricade. He had been sleeping peacefully in his bed with Mason and the next thing he had known his phone—which should have been turned off—was blaring at him until he answered.

It seemed like Wheeljack had finished his costume, then decided that he needed to come in immediately for it. Two in the morning seemed a bit extreme, but he would have had to wake up early for the Halloween party, anyway, so he hadn't minded as much. Especially not since it meant Barricade got to leave base to get him, something that made the 'con that much friendlier and easier to deal with. When they arrived at base Miles got out of Barricade and started walking with the 'con to Wheeljack's lab.

"Did anyone approve it?" Miles asked, slightly worried.

"Prowl." Barricade replied, "He's the one who gave permission for you to slide around the rule for this instance."

Miles felt slightly relieved then, figuring that Prowl would make the right say on things if nothing else.

They arrived at the lab and Barricade left him alone, going off to do his own things. Miles went inside and almost immediately Wheeljack told him to sit off to the side because he was busy. The scientist did offer him some cookies and a glass of milk, which the teen thought a little odd but he took anyway and munched on.

Wheeljack's busy work seemed to be just staring at him, which Miles found a bit unnerving. It was like the scientist was waiting for something, but he couldn't for the life of him fathom what it would be.

"I had a few questions about what your costume could do for you," Wheeljack stated. "I wanted to make sure that some of it's features would be alright for you."

"Uhm..." Miles was surprised that the scientist was actually asking him, "What're the questions?"

"How do you feel about attachments that would move according to your emotions and feel outside stimuli?"

"Well, uh..." The teen knew he was treading a thin line but he couldn't figure out how just yet. "That sounds cool."

"Do you have any idea how these may work?"

Miles thought for a moment, yawning. "I imagine they'd have to be super connected in a case like that if I wasn't working them step by step. Have to receive nerve impulses, though I don't think a human brain is coded to move things outside of what it already has."

"Oh, it can be trained." Wheeljack said cheerfully, making alarm bells go off in Miles' head. "How would you feel about something like that?"

"We're speaking temporary, right?"

"Hmm," The scientist made a thoughtful noise, "I wasn't imagining it, but yes it could be temporary if you would prefer."

"Then I wouldn't mind that as much..." Miles replied cautiously, yawning.

"Tired, Miles?" Wheeljack asked when he yawned.

The teen set his glass of milk to the side as quickly as he could manage, realizing something was a bit off too late to do anything about it. Those alarm bells had turned into a full blown siren by this point.

"Like you mentioned before, any costume that includes being able to have moving attachments that aren't directly affected by you constantly would need to have an invasive procedure beforehand." Wheeljack told him, "So that it remains painless for you I've given you a strong anesthetic I've designed that will knock you out and make sure you don't feel anything."

Realizing he was fucked, the teen just opted to lay himself down instead of passing out under the effects of whatever Wheeljack had given him and hitting the floor instead. It was hard to keep his eyes open enough to give the scientist what he hoped was a very hateful look.

"Oh, and speaking on the removal of your costume..." Wheeljack paused here, his voice suddenly hesitant. "I didn't think to consider that, so it may take awhile. That's alright, isn't it?"

Miles wanted to say it very much wasn't alright. It was much too late, though, and he could say it no longer as he fell asleep instead.

* * *

The next time he woke up he realized he was lying on a cool metal table and that everything felt a bit fuzzy. His head hurt a bit, as well as his lower back in one spot and he couldn't think of why. He chalked it down to sleeping wrong and hitting his head off something without noticing.

He sat up, trying to figure out where he was when he couldn't place the large berth. It took him a moment to recognize Wheeljack's lab, changed since the last time it had been destroyed, and with a jolt of nervousness he remembered what had happened. The scientist must have put him up on the berth to make whatever he had been doing to him easier.

Miles looked at the ground and decided it wasn't all that far away, jumping off the table and stumbling a bit but managing to stay upright. He looked around again, searching for the scientist, but his eyes landed on a full length mirror instead. Wheeljack must have left it there for him. He moved towards it, curious to see what exactly the scientist had needed to knock him out for in order to connect it to him.

His jaw dropped when he saw what looked like two cat ears on his head, a cat tail behind him. The fur covering them was the same exact color as his hair; when he reached up to feel an ear he could feel and see it move. He could see the tail moving behind him, and he grabbed it, pinching hard. He could feel the pain from it, but a detached part of him noted that he could feel that it wasn't normal, reminding him of the cat mech that he'd faced what seemed like ages ago now.

When his tail slipped out of his hand of its' own accord he started to panic again. He grabbed it again and tugged a bit harder, hissing in pain before reaching to the base of his spine and feeling where it went into him. The area around it hurt and he turned to look in the mirror and see that it was an angry red. He gave an experimental tug at his extra set of ears and found them firmly attached as well.

Prowl had _approved_ of this? Here he and Jazz had been thinking that there would never be any retribution from the stoic SIC, now he was regretting ever messing with him. He took a deep breath, telling himself that he could easily get Ratchet to at least make Wheeljack suffer terribly.

The teen left the lab, knowing his tail was twitching anxiously but not knowing how to get it to stop. He contemplated hiding it in his pants but knew it would be useless since he had no hat to hide the ears, too. He decided to go to Will's office, knowing that even though the soldier would be unable to help him he could provide a safe haven, and he jogged to get back to the base quickly so he could try and avoid anyone seeing him in his current state.

His phone told him that it was still early, only now nearing six, and he could only pray that the older man was awake. He entered the building through the back entrance to try and avoid anyone he didn't want to see him, sneaking to Will's office as quickly as he could. He knocked as soon as he reached the door.

"Come in," Will's voice called.

Miles sighed gratefully, walking in and stopping in his tracks as he noticed with mild lurch of his stomach that Epps and Jazz were in the room, too.

"Miles…" Jazz greeted, looking over him carefully. "Ya look different. Ah see Wheeljack got at ya."

Almost in unison the Saboteur and the Sergeant moved over to him. Will just stared with wide eyes as Miles watched them nervously, Epps reaching out and grabbing his tail before giving it a painful tug.

"Hey!" Miles hissed, "That's attached, you know!"

Epps started to laugh, "Oh, Primus, this is great! We need to get you a better outfit, though. Maybe a collar with a bell and a leash!

Miles started to back away towards Will, never noticing the grin on Will's face as he moved beside him.

"Will, you have to stop the-Hey!" Miles cried out as Will shoved him towards Jazz, "You traitor!"

"Sorry, mah man. Looks like ya higher ups are goin' against ya." Jazz said, though he didn't sound apologetic at all as he picked Miles up with one arm underneath his knees and the other behind his back.

Jazz carried Miles out of Will's office with Epps following behind. Both ignored the fuss that Miles was making, Jazz not being hurt no matter how much Miles kicked and punched at him, though he was severely amused when the teen actually got desperate enough to bite at him.

"Let me go! This is kidnapping! Help! Someone help!" Miles cried, hitting at Jazz's chest. He knew he couldn't actually hurt the 'bot, but he was hitting his hardest just in case. "Barry, they're gonna torture me! Ratchet! Anybody!"

But no one answered, leaving him at their mercy for whatever they planned to do to him. It was then that Miles decided that a lot of people were going to pay for this. Prowl for letting Wheeljack do it, Wheeljack for doing it in the first place, Will for sacrificing him, Barricade for waking him up, and Jazz and Epps for being Jazz and Epps.


	13. Chapter 12

When Sam arrived at the base for the Halloween festivities around eight in the morning with his Guardian and his girlfriend he heard an awful lot about some new cat that had popped up. Knowing that the base was never so simple and that Ironhide would most likely shoot a cat normally, the teen instantly knew something was up. Bumblebee and Mikaela agreed with him, but as the three had no idea what could be up they quickly brushed it off.

Both Sam and Mikaela were already in their costumes. While he was thoroughly embarrassed and at first had found it awkward to ride in Bee, he knew he could always get Miles back later, and it wasn't all that bad. The shorts were a respectable enough length for him, nothing as short as Mikaela's, and it was amusing how pleased Bumblebee was by the outfits and his cheerleaders.

The first thing the two teens had done was get introduced to Blurr, thankfully without any shaking incidents. Then they went to the rec-room, where Will, Barricade, Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, and some other soldiers were already in the room.

"So what's this about a stray cat?" Mikaela asked Will.

"Oh, Wheeljack ma—_found_ him," The Captain corrected himself, obviously trying his hardest not to grin. "If you hear a bell anywhere that's probably him. Last I heard his name was Flower, and he was in the med-bay with Ratchet."

"Heard anything about Miles?" Barricade asked, obviously not interested in any cat nonsense. "I haven't seen him since I dropped him off at the lab."

"Oh, uhm, I think he's in the medbay, too." Will replied, snorting with laughter but trying to cover it up with coughs.

Sam and Mikaela gave Will an odd look while Bumblebee and Barricade just shook their heads, walking out of the room with the two teenagers.

"Concerned about Miles?" Mikaela teased Barricade lightly.

Barricade snorted, "Hardly. I was going to have the organic give me a wash and a massage. Hard to do when he's up and disappeared like he has."

Mikaela rolled her eyes, not deigning to give the 'con a proper response to that. They walked to the med-bay, but paused two halls away, where they could already hear the CMO screaming and the sound of things hitting walls that probably shouldn't have been tossed. Sam stopped there, considering suggesting that they come back later, but Mikaela and Bumblebee grabbed him and pushed him onwards.

Upon entering the med-bay it wasn't Ratchet or Wheeljack they noticed first, but Miles. The teen appeared to be glaring a hole in the floor from his perch up on one of the giant berths, a pair of cat ears on his head and a cat tail appearing from behind his back. It slowly clicked that he was the new cat on base, the reason Will had been so amused and the cat's name was Flower. Whiskers had been drawn on his cheeks and he was wearing a pair of cat paw gloves. Sam's mouth dropped open, Mikaela letting out a tiny sound. It wasn't hard for any of them to guess what Ratchet was yelling about after seeing Miles. The medic was mainly yelling in Cybertronian, though he would switch to English and several other languages when he gestured at Miles or when he appeared to be letting out a very long list of expletives.

"Oh, God," Mikaela said when they saw Miles' tail move and the ears twitch when Ratchet said his name, "That's so adorable."

This drew everyone's attention to the newest members of the room, Ratchet stopping his yelling immediately and Wheeljack looking beyond relieved.

"Hey guys," Miles greeted, his voice an odd sort of falsely cheerful none of them had heard before. "Want a good tip? Never let Wheeljack design _anything_ for you."

"It's not that bad!" Wheeljack protested immediately, "If I was any less of a scientist you could be dead right now. I had to directly enable those attachments to insert to your spinal chord and that could have gone wrong in tons of ways!"

Miles didn't look at all cheered by that.

"And tell them how long it will take before we can remove them," Ratchet ordered.

"Oh, that." Wheeljack seemed to visibly deflate, "I never considered that young Miles may want them removed so I did not plan for it initially."

"How hard could it be?" Sam asked, "You put them in. Can't you just do the reverse of whatever and take them out?"

"Oh, he'll figure it out. It'll take some time for him to properly do so where he won't hurt Miles, but the glitch gave Miles specifically tailored nanobots," Ratchet vented sharply, "They're basically our version of your specific cells; we have nanobots that do repairs and help take care of bodily managements and so on. We have far more control over them then you do your own cells, so much so that we can code entirely new ones to perform specific tasks. The glitch did that for Miles. His body accepted them so well that there's a chance they might fight Wheeljack in his removal process."

"Isn't there a possibility his body could fight against them?" Bumblebee asked worriedly before the medic could continue.

Miles looked at Ratchet with wide eyes, the medic just letting out a snort.

"Already checked. As incompetent as Wheeljack can be he wouldn't go and kill him, thankfully." Ratchet replied, turning back to look at Sam. "What the nanobots are coded to do in this case is make sure his body accepts the implants, the nanobots themselves, and that he heals quicker. They've already sped up the progress to whatever damage Wheeljack may have done so that the spinal chord has grown around them and they are quite literally a part of him now."

"I did code all of the nanobots to die after having some minor affects on him," Wheeljack stepped in to explain. "Some will help amp up the creation of rhodopsin in his eye and others will work to improve his eyesight in general. However there was an unexpected development in that his body took more to the nanobots then I expected. Before any of them could terminate themselves like I had coded they managed to reproduce, as with no interference from his body they never went into a protective and non-reproductive mode. The reproduced ones will not follow the coding of the other ones to self-terminate. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if by the end of it they recode themselves and have different jobs then I ever intended for them!"

The scientist sounded almost astounded and oddly happy with that thought.

"Which is exactly why we never tried to figure out how to introduce nanobots into human medicine just yet!" Ratchet growled, smacking Wheeljack over the helm hard. "While the implications of what nanobots could help humans to do is staggering, there's just too many variables for us to properly account for. Every human body has subtle differences which is in stark contrast to our own kind, where only frames differ but not even that much and it is the spark that makes the individual. Adding nanobots into the human anatomy when they already have the capability of recoding themselves after a long time of reproduction is a foolhardy thing to do."

"There will only be a few side effects from the nanobots. Worse comes to worse they go wild and start mutating him." Wheeljack said cheerfully, "But don't worry, we'll offline you before that gets too bad, young Miles."

Bumblebee was probably the only one in the entire room to appreciate the scientist's joking. Miles looked at the mech in horror, ears flattening against his head. Sam and Mikaela were wearing matching wide eyed expressions, mouths open in a small 'o' of shock. Ratchet looked furious, though that had been his expression since they'd entered the med-bay, and Barricade looked annoyed.

"Relax, I was just kidding!" Wheeljack exclaimed, rolling his optics at all of them. "If anything the nanobots will only help Miles. Is it really that terrible if he gets improved sight, better healing capabilities, and a most likely impeccable immune system? I'd say that he's been done a favor."

While Wheeljack was talking Ratchet had moved to pick up a wrench. The scientist continued unaware; the medic tossing it right at his helm when he finished talking. Miles and Sam both visibly flinched at the loud clanging sound it made, then again when Wheeljack crumpled to the ground. Ratchet had offlined him in one hit.

"Glitched in the processor! He has the gall to say the organic's been done a _favor_? Nothing more than a useless scrap heap..." Ratchet could be heard muttering as he bent down to pick Wheeljack up and put him on a berth. The medic whirled around, gesturing wildly at Miles once more. "You! Get out of here, I'll see what I can do!"

Miles jumped off the berth and quickly hightailed it over to his four friends. They all practically raced out of the room when they saw Ratchet pick up another wrench, even Barricade seeming to fear the medic enough to move a bit faster than his normal pace. But once they made it out into the hall Sam and Mikaela gave Miles a full once over. The teen caught their stares and he struck a pose.

"In the name of the mew I shall punish you!" Miles claimed, even going so far as to actually copy Sailor Moon's pose for when she said her catchphrase.

Mikaela and Sam both started to laugh hard, but Bumblebee and Barricade were just left staring at the three organics in confusion. After a minute passed with Sam and Mikaela still laughing and Miles just grinning at them, the Scout thought it best to ask the teen about the rest of his costume.

"Epps and Jazz caught me," Miles explained with a huff, grin disappearing quickly. "This stuff came from some role-play kink box, and Epps won't give me the key to the collar! I'm more thankful that it hadn't been opened and they only forced the gloves and the collar on me instead of the included dress, but it's still terrible."

"For the love of God!" Sam snickered helplessly, "I don't think I need to get you back for making me a Bee cheerleader anymore."

"I can't believe 'Cade here was actually stupid enough to let you have Wheeljack do anything for you!" Mikaela said, prompting both Sam and Bee to nod in agreement.

"You know, I actually agree with you, 'Kaela." Miles turned to give Barricade an accusing stare, "Why the hell didn't you tell me I was being completely stupid?"

Barricade growled, "Don't blame this on me! The last time I told you not to do something you went and did it anyway _and_ got hurt just like I said you would."

Miles was about to reply when they heard Epps screaming from down the hall. All four turned to look down the hall they had just been walking in as the Sergeant continued to scream. Epps ran straight at them, then past them when they parted enough to let him through. It was then that they saw some large orange mech turn the corner, all of them taking a moment to realize it was Ironhide. They watched as Ironhide tried to shoot at Epps, but all that came out of his cannons were pumpkin guts. Sam started to laugh, though this quickly turned into a fearful squeak as he hid behind Miles when a cannon was pointed in his direction.

"Dude. You're a fucking jack-o-lantern!" Miles laughed, unafraid at the prospect of being blasted with pumpkin guts. In fact, he was wearing a smirk. "I may know of two others who did this to you. Need to make those bastards suffer, I'd say."

Ironhide narrowed his optics, "Who? I assumed he worked with the twins."

"Nope!" Miles replied cheerfully, "Will and Jazz. Will gave them your recharge cycle and helped replace your ammo. Jazz and Epps did your costume. I know because Jazz was telling me all about it when they were forcing me into my own costume."

"Thanks." Ironhide's optics glowed brightly, the mech transforming down into his alt mode and racing down the hall Epps' had disappeared down.

Sam turned to look at Miles. "You know they're slagged, right?"

"Will turned on me." Miles said simply, "Jazz and Epps deserve it, I doubt that needs any explanation. Now I only need to get Prowl."

"Prowl?" Bumblebee asked, raising an optic ridge.

"He approved Wheeljack's idea. I think he was getting me back." Miles replied, already walking away down the hall. Every step made the bell on his collar jingle.

The four followed Miles, pretty sure that Prowl would never have it in him to do something like that. After a minute or two of silence Sam crept up on Miles and reached his hand out to yank on his tail. He snickered when Miles jumped and hissed, turning to glare at him.

"Cat suits you perfectly, bro!" Sam said, grinning.

Miles glared, "And your costume suits you perfectly. I didn't know they were going to put Bee's bee-otch on the side, but it fits."

"I think we both look fabulous!" Mikaela snickered, striking a pose next to her boyfriend. Her costume, however, did not have Bee's bee-otch on the side.

"I have to concur," Bumblebee agreed with a smirk. "I enjoy having my own cheerleaders."

"Too bad we can't go trick or treating like this anymore," Mikaela sighed, "I was gonna have Bee do up his holo, too."

"Wait, why can't we go trick or treating anymore?" Sam asked, feeling stupid when his girlfriend just gave him a look.

"Well, I can't exactly leave base like this," Miles pointed out, "How would I even begin explaining it to my parents? And school's out, too. Can't wear a hat and I doubt the stuff would stay still even if I could cover it. I'd have to say I was some sort of test subject or something! Not to mention I don't think I can ever go to a normal doctor anymore. I'll have to stick with Ratchet or someone on base."

"We'll just come up with some excuse and lie to your parents like normal," Sam said, trying to comfort his friend. From Mikaela's glare and they way Miles' ears were drooping, he figured he had failed spectacularly.

"Don't worry, Ratchet's good and Wheeljack's pretty smart when he has someone to guide him in the right direction." Mikaela assured him, stepping closer and sneaking one of her hands up to Miles' head to stroke at an ear. "They'll be gone quickly. Sam can bring you any homework you have and if you need to talk to your parents just wear a hat and sit on your tail. It'll be no different than one of your usual stays here."

Their conversation continued for a bit, both Cybertronians more than willing to just let Mikaela and Sam handle Miles for the moment. Mikaela seemed quite content to continue to pet Miles, Sam watching in amusement as his best friend tilted his head into the touch without noticing. There was a small pause as Mikaela did something a bit different and Miles' reply faltered to be replaced by an appreciative hum.

Mikaela giggled, "One of those side effects must be purring."

Miles groaned, because while the noise he had made wasn't quite purring, it had sounded close enough for everyone to get a kick out of it.

"Great, I really am a fucking cat!"

"Here, kitty, kitty, kitty!" Barricade called teasingly, gesturing for Miles to come to him.

Miles just hissed at him.

* * *

News of Miles' predicament had spread through the base quickly. No one was sure who started it, but a game of who could sneak up on the teen and pull his tail quickly became popular. It was later blamed on Sunstreaker, though it mainly just resulted in Miles asking to be carried by a Cybertronian a lot to try and avoid being targeted by various humans. By the time the party was really starting Miles had taken up an almost permanent spot by Barricade, knowing the 'con would scare the most annoying people away, though he wouldn't deter the bravest.

Ratchet and Wheeljack both would miss the entire party because they were working on a way to fix Miles. The last thing Ratchet wanted was the boy to be stuck with NEST for the rest of his life because a poor excuse of a scrap heap had thought it a good idea at the time. While Wheeljack had asked permission it was hardly like he had explained everything thoroughly enough to give the teen a chance to actually think and say no, so that didn't win him any brownie points from the medic.

Miles had crossed paths with the mech he really blamed for the incident just once. He almost would have given up blaming him and thought the SIC was innocent and just hadn't understood what Wheeljack had meant, but he caught the slightest of smirks on his faceplates. This resulted in the teen threatening him and the Tactician denying all knowledge of any of his accusations.

Those closer to Miles were half surprised he wasn't freaking out more, but then again they were doing their best to distract him. It helped when the twins called everyone in to the haunted maze they had taken the liberty of making a bit away from the base. They had made the entire thing from crates and boxes, stacked high enough to tower over even the tallest soldier's head. Everyone had to go in on foot, and the Cybertronians had to use their holoforms to make it more fair. Only three were allowed in at a time, and the first three to go were Miles, Barricade, and Sam. Mikaela and Bumblebee both decided to wait and hear whether or not it was worth it

Not even twenty feet from the opening and the 'con already had both Miles and Sam closer to him then they had been previously, Miles even going so far as to hang on to his arm. He wasn't angry about it, though. Even he knew the twins well enough by this point to realize that something would probably go horribly; if they were close to him then he could just get them out easier without being yelled at by the Scout or Ratchet should they end up hurt without his aid.

The start of the maze wasn't that bad. There was the normal few cheap thrills that made up basic haunted mazes. Things popping out at them, a robotic and murderous scarecrow chasing them with a chainsaw deeper into the maze before it disappeared down another branch of it and left them alone, and a miniature replica of Prowl that threatened to throw them in the brig.

"You're almost to the middle, congratulations!" Sideswipe's voice rang out loudly from a speaker hidden somewhere in the wall of the maze, "At the very center of the maze is where our scariest horror awaits, so don't be too alarmed!"

Suddenly wary, the three trekked to the center of the maze slowly. There were miniature replicas of Starscream and Megatron in all their bipedal glory... _interfacing._ Then directly next to those holograms were fake holoforms of the two Decepticons, giving them human forms to show them having sex. Sam and Miles stared in shock at what they were seeing, trying to comprehend it, and Barricade was torn between shock, anger, disgust, and a very small amount of amusement.

"OH MY GOD, MY POOR INNOCENT EYES!" Sam screamed.

The teen then made the terrible mistake of attempting to run out of the center of the maze, trying to run past the miniature replicas of Starscream and Megatron. Miles watched in horror as the fake Megatron got a chord from... somewhere, he really didn't want to look too closely, and had it go after Sam. His friend's ankle was grabbed and he fell to the ground harshly, being dragged backwards by the wire. Megatron asked Sam very sweetly to join him and Starscream.

Miles turned to Barricade with a horrified look, the 'con just grunting something and turning them both around to leave the way they had came. They could hear Sam screaming something unintelligible as they left him behind, but Miles wasn't too worried about his friend. He could hear Bumblebee shouting at the twins, seeing the Scout enter the maze in his bipedal form. He knew the Scout would rescue Sam. Barricade just didn't care.

* * *

Barricade entered the rec-room with Sam, Miles, Mikaela, and Bumblebee; every Cybertronian was in their holoform so they could fit inside of it. Besides them there was Maggie, Will, Epps, Jazz, Optimus, Ironhide, Blurr, Fig, Sideswipe, Sunstreaker, and a few other army personnel that he couldn't bother to think of names for. There was plenty of high grade energon for the Cybertronians to drink and alcoholic beverages for the humans. The room was full of decorations for Halloween.

Ironhide had decided to go as a pumpkin even in his holoform, Sam and Mikaela were still 'cheerleaders' for Bumblebee, Bumblebee himself was a wearing a shirt that called him Captain Bumblebee, Will was a knight, Epps was dressed as a devil, Jazz was Yoda, Blurr was a farmer, Fig was a Spanish conquistador, Barricade had gone as the expected police man, and Sideswipe and Sunstreaker were each other. Maggie and Optimus were the only two in the room who hadn't bothered with an outfit of any kind.

The energon provided for the Cybertronians was high grade, the closest thing they had to alcohol. All of the mechs had to drink it outside of the rec-room, but even the inexperienced Blurr had no problem splitting his consciousness enough to do that while using his holoform to play Maggie in chess.

All of the humans, including the teens, indulged in a few alcoholic drinks. Epps had argued their case, stating that Mikaela was already eighteen and both Sam and Miles would be turning that age soon. They were around people and 'bots capable of supervising them and it would make it less likely that they'd go out and try it on their own and do something stupid. No one had bothered to argue with the Sergeant, though it helped quite a bit when even Sam admitted to having been at least slightly intoxicated before because of his own family, Miles and Mikaela not being nearly as hesitant as he had been about it.

Halfway through the night and Epps, Fig, and Will were varying degrees of drunk. Mikaela was slightly tipsy and Sam was revealed to be a lightweight, where Miles hardly touched any alcohol offered to him and chose instead to stick mainly to water. Barricade, like Miles, wasn't drinking much of the Cybertronian version of alcohol. It appeared that Bumblebee, Blurr, and Sideswipe were lightweights, too. Blurr actually slowed down, though, which was a blessing for everyone around him.

Sam was still upset after the twin's latest prank and he had been avoiding touching Mikaela like the plague, as if just a touch could remind him of what he had seen. This meant that Bumblebee was stuck in the middle between the two of them, Mikaela cuddling against his side and pouting that her boyfriend wouldn't even hold her hand.

The two teens were cheered when Sideswipe decided that going around the room and everyone taking a turn to admit something about themselves that no one else knew was a good idea. Ironhide, who was completely drunk by then, revealed that he and Annabelle played pretty princess and that he quite enjoyed it. He had then gotten angry when everyone and mech in the room had laughed at him, causing Will and Optimus to physically drag his holoform out of the room and the Prime to order him to go to bed.

"Alright," Epps said, still snickering. "The younguns, then! You've all had something to drink before, any good stories?"

Mikaela rolled her eyes, "I will remind you that I am one of the Queens of my high school, Bobby. I've been to quite a few parties, but I've not done anything too stupid. Just a lot more dancing then I'd do normally."

"My mom used to do Tequila Thursdays," Sam added in, "Well, before she gave up alcohol for lent two years ago, anyway. She was always of the opinion that if I tried it with her then I was less likely to go off somewhere and die trying to try it because I was curious and hadn't tried it with her."

"Does that include..." Epps trailed off meaningfully. Those who didn't catch on what he was referring to would have been those that would have objected to it, anyway.

"I'm not admitting anything," Sam replied.

"Your mom's a seriously scary lady," Epps laughed, turning to Miles. "And what about you?"

"I was the thing Judy feared Sam doing," Miles replied with a deep sigh. "Made a friend called Rick in middle school and he had some awesome high school connections. Went to a party and I drank way too much. Don't even remember most of the night it was that much, all I know is I woke up half naked in some random chick's house with a nasty hangover and a sharpie dick on my forehead. Spent the rest of the day hiding out there and puking my guts out so I wouldn't get in trouble at home. Dumped Rick as a friend pretty quickly after that point, but I'm still friends with the chick."

"You never told me that!" Sam accused, sounding offended.

"Well we are supposed to be telling everyone something they don't know about us," Miles shrugged. "Outside of that I'm pretty much an open book. Give me some secrets!"

Sam laid off at that point, everyone else slowly revealing something about themselves. Most stuck with simple things, like Bumblebee admitting he had ever only lost two actual battles. One was when he was up against Megatron and ended up getting his vocalisor ripped out, the other had been a battle of wills against Sam's mother that the Scout had quickly lost. He wasn't too ashamed to admit that he was whipped by the entire Witwicky family.

Once everyone had revealed something suitable about themselves, Bumblebee had challenged Barricade to a drinking contest. Almost everyone vacated the room to watch their bipedal modes go at it, the two similarly-framed mechs trying to go drink for drink. Of course, that meant Barricade had to drink quite a bit in the first place just to catch up with Bumblebee, but the 'con proved himself to be just as tough as he looked, eventually besting the Scout and showing that he was able to hold his high grade just a bit better than Bee.

Later on in the night when most of the people had gone to sleep or just left the rec-room, the remaining humans and mechs there had decided to make their own game. It was a mix of spin the bottle, the card kissing game, chicken, and seven minutes in heaven. If the person couldn't transfer the card to the person next to them successfully then the two had to play the kissing version of chicken. If one of them was chicken then they'd lose and the braver would win, if both kissed then they had to make out for three minutes in front of all the others. The two people that were participating were chosen by a spinning bottle.

The only people and Cybertronians left in the room to play the game sat in a circle; going clock wise it was Sam, Bumblebee, Barricade, Miles, Epps, Jazz, Will, Sideswipe, Maggie, and then back to Sam. Sideswipe had a camera to record everything, even if most of the Cybertronians there would remember it all anyway. All of them were at varying degrees of intoxication, which was probably the only reason some of them had agreed to it in the first place. Only two of them were completely sober at that point, that being Miles and Jazz, and they had agreed because it sounded like a fun idea that could lead to even funnier things.

To Miles' pleasure, and the amusement of everyone else, Barricade was much like Mikaela when he was drunk in that he seemed to appreciate touch a whole lot more. He had practically forced the teen to be glued to his side; now the teenager was leaning against Barricade, tail wrapped around the Decepticon Neutral's wrist and head leant on his shoulder. Barricade was running one simulated hand through Miles' hair, occasionally stroking one of the ears, and seeming to take an odd sort of enjoyment from when the teen would obligingly let out a fake purr for him.

The first pair up was Epps and Will, and while trying to transfer the card to Epps' lips Will dropped it. This then turned it to the chicken part of the game, the Captain pulling away first. Triumphant, Epps had shouted happily and kissed the captain anyway, turning to the camera that Sideswipe was holding and saying if Sarah was jealous he'd kiss her too.

Next was Sam and Bumblebee, the two actually managing to pass the card between themselves without dropping it, much to the disappointment of several others in the room.

"Aw, me 'n 'Kaela have been dyin' to see you two kiss!" Maggie exclaimed, not out right drunk, but tipsy enough to say a few stupid things. She quickly shut her mouth when Bumblebee shot her an amused look, blushing in embarrassment.

After that was Will and Maggie and they managed to pass the cards to each other as well. Next came Sideswipe and Jazz, Jazz 'accidentally' letting the card drop. Sideswipe pulled away first and grumbled something under his breath in Cybertronian, causing Jazz to smirk. After that Jazz had to go again, though this time he was paired with Bumblebee. The card was dropped by the Scout and as both didn't back down they kissed, though the group came to a unanimous agreement that they didn't need to do the full three minutes as they were both just too calm about it.

Barricade watched it all with an amused smirk, continuing to basically pet Miles even while the human shifted and occasionally laughed. When the bottle went from him to Miles the two stood, the teen placing the card on his lips and doing his best to keep it there.

Miles walked the few steps to Barricade, more steady then most of the others had been in his sober state. He was already leaning in close to the Decepticon Neutral when the card fell from his lips and he froze, tail twitching back and forth apprehensively as he stared directly into the holoform's eyes.

"CHICKEN!" Epps yelled from off to the side, grinning as Sam, Bumblebee, Jazz, Will, and Sideswipe started to chant the word.

Barricade sent a glare at all of them, leaning in towards Miles as Miles leaned in towards him. It was very obvious the teen didn't expect the 'con to go so far, the two only an inch apart when Miles seemed to realize that Barricade wasn't going to back off and that he should instead. Just before he went to take a step back, Barricade got the hint that he was going to give in, and in a testament to just how drunk the 'con was, he grabbed Miles' face and pulled him in for a kiss anyway.

Miles laughed, attempting to shove the 'con away even as a cheer started up from those still sitting in the circle, Epps proclaiming Barricade the winner. Barricade was more than satisfied by that, just sitting back down in his original spot.

Miles turned to Maggie, determined to embarrass someone as much as he had just been embarrassed. "You gotta pay up. Said you'd give me fifty bucks if Barry and I kissed, remember?"

"I-I…" Maggie stuttered, eyes widening in a mixture of embarrassment and horror as her face heated up when half of the circle looked at her in shock. "Sit down and shut up, I'll pay you later!"

"Okay!" Miles snickered cheerfully, satisfied in the hacker's thorough embarrassment.

He resumed his place by Barricade, watching with interest as the next two to go were Jazz and Epps.

The Sergeant dropped the card when he stumbled drunkenly towards the Saboteur. The two stared each other down during the chicken part, both too stubborn and one just a little too drunk to back down. They kissed, Jazz remaining calm while Epps seemed to be battling himself as much as he was the mech to continue it and win. The entire game and they were the only two to go the entire three minutes without either backing off during the make out session, resulting in a tie and making them the winners of the game altogether.

Shortly after they stopped playing the five humans fell asleep. Miles took up most of one couch, head in Barricade's lap and using the mech's holoform as a pillow. The 'con only allowed it because of the high grade in his system and the fact that he was already in a light recharge, only just managing to keep his holoform going. Will and Epps were sharing a lazy boy recliner, the two sleeping with their heads crooked at an awkward angle. Maggie got an entire couch to herself, Sam sharing the third one with Bumblebee.

Jazz, Sideswipe, and Bumblebee had all left their holoforms in the rec-room, but sent their main consciousness to their actual body so they could do other things. That was why, a few hours later, Fig was able to enter the rec-room and find it full of what he thought to be sleeping humans and mechs in their holoforms.

And there, in the middle of the ground, was a camera. Fig picked it up and glanced through it, unable to stop himself from laughing and waking all of the others up.

"Well, well, well," Fig drawled, smirking as he held the camera up. "You lot had some fun last night, hmm?"

Miles and Sam just gave a tired groan in unison, one teen burying his head back down into Barricade's lap, while the other put his hands over his ears. Sideswipe, Bumblebee, and Jazz all returned to their holoforms with clear processors, staring at Fig in mild shock as they registered what he had said and what he had. Then Sideswipe growled, standing and running after the laughing soldier.

Of course, the peace after Fig left the rec-room didn't last very long. Barricade had woken up and now that he was awake enough to not only recognize what was going on but remember the night before as well, he pushed Miles straight off the couch and onto the ground, causing the teen to give a pained yelp of surprise.

* * *

It was the day after Halloween. Prowl was in his office, working to make sure that the Autobots and several of the soldiers had orders to clean up whatever celebrations were still around from the night before. He ignored one of the tiny civilian organics entering his office at first, but when he didn't respond to the organic he climbed up onto his desk and stood on it with arms crossed impatiently.

With a sigh, he finally put his data pad down to look at Miles. "What do you want?"

"A temporary alliance." Miles replied to the question, sitting down on the edge of the desk now that he had the mech's attention.

"A..." Prowl didn't seem to believe what he had heard, "A _what_?"

"I know this was your idea," Miles sighed, pointing to the cat ears perched on top of his head. The tail spoke for itself as it moved around behind his back.

"But-" Prowl began, only to be cut off by the human.

"Now, I am assuming that you didn't know all the specifics about what Jack was gonna do. Cuz if you did then I'd be seriously pissed, but while I do have to rethink my idea of you not getting payback in any ways I will still hold to the belief that you wouldn't do it in a way that was prolonged and actually detrimental to me." Miles waved a dismissive hand, Prowl just nodding after a moment. "However, the fact remains that I am now stuck with these things on me and with nanobots inside of me. I was already planning ways to make you suffer, but after what Sideswipe and Sunstreaker did yesterday I would rather team up with you."

"For what, exactly?" Prowl asked, thrown for a loop as his logic processor tried to figure out just what Miles was talking about.

"I've heard stories of how annoying the twins are for you," Miles stated, grinning. "And they got Sam yesterday. While it was very amusing, Sam's my territory, and it's just not nice that they seriously put him off any fun time with Mikky for at least two weeks. If they're getting bold enough to mess with humans, then I think its time that humans messed back."

Prowl was silent for a moment as he studied Miles. Slowly he turned off his data pad, then he got up and made sure the door was locked so that no one would interrupt them.

"What did you have in mind?"

"Something drawn out, that would really mess with their brai—err, I mean processors." Miles said, "I was kind of hoping that you'd be able to figure something out with that huge processor of yours."

Prowl gave that some thought, carefully going over any incidents he could recall the twins being in. One in particular stuck out to him, an event where the twins had been on an organic planet that had possessed fire breathers that had nearly killed them both after they had destroyed some honored temple. It was somewhat amusing to think back on now, the organics on that planet had looked remotely similar to what a human might call a dragon.

"Earth is still new to them," Prowl stated after a moment. "There are a lot of superstitions and folk lore on this planet. There was an incident on a previous planet where they destroyed a treasured temple and were nearly offlined for it, I imagine if we do something similar here then they will react without much thought. Perhaps we should go for something a bit more supernatural, some sort of human spirits, I'd say. It would be easier to control what happened to them and keep it going on base, as well."

Miles laughed, "You really are more evil than you seem!"

"Don't tell the Prime," Prowl replied with some amusement, picking the teen up and sitting back down at his desk. "Now, I believe we have some research to do."

He settled the teen on his shoulder, making it so that he had a good view as he re-activated his datapad, the teen now able to see what was on it as well. And research they did. The two stayed together locked up in that room from a little after breakfast until it was almost dinner time, both skipping lunch in favor of working on their plan. As they were in the United States they mainly focused on legends that had started in the surrounding lands, researching a lot of Native American folk lore, stories from early settlers, and the like. It wasn't until they reached one particular story that they really started to talk again.

"This is why emotions are tedious and illogical," Prowl vented softly. "Had she not let her emotions dictate her then her entire tribe would still be alive."

Miles glanced up at the SIC, "You really think emotions are illogical?"

"Yes," Prowl replied.

"But..." The teen thought of how to say what he wanted, "If we lose someone then it is only natural to feel bad about that loss, isn't it? Emotions help dictate what we want to do and give us purpose. Like pleasing the one we love or doing a hobby we enjoy."

"I am dictated by logic and nothing else, Miles."

"You work so hard because you want to protect all the Autobots, don't you?" Miles asked, "They're your family, your friends. You love them. You show it in all of your rules to protect them and to keep some of them sane and from offlining or alienating the others. I'm sure that if you didn't have so many rules to keep Sunny and Sides in check they'd act up a lot more and that would end badly in how they're treated. That's not logic. Stopping them from annoying others when they do no serious harm is useless and a waste of time, isn't it? But you found them and helped to train them and took a shine to them, that's why you deal with all of the trouble they cause now. You're just as ruled by emotions as the rest of us."

"Fair enough, but that is very obvious, I suppose."

"No, it really isn't." Miles sighed, "Because half of the soldiers are convinced you're emotionless and literally just a robot and the most of the rest of the humans on the base agree that you're just a prick in general."

"I am not a human-"

"Slang."

"Oh." A slight pause as he looked it up, "That's a rather rude term."

"And you don't really think human's are worth much."

Prowl was going to protest, but read the look on the teen's face. "I... it is perhaps not as extreme as you make it sound."

"You see us as a stepping stone," Miles hissed, before taking a deep breath to calm himself. "I can see why. We have short lifespans. Outside of a select few soldiers none of us are even affecting you or the Autobots that much, it's higher up. And seeing why is one reason I sought you out."

"So this isn't just to get back at the twins?"

"Not just, no." Miles shrugged a bit, "Because us humans ain't really seeing you as being worth much right now, either, and a lot of it just has to do with your attitude. But you really surprised me with this Wheeljack thing. It was completely unlogical, completely dictated by just wanting to get me back. So I thought I'd give you a chance and try to work you up to the big leagues."

Prowl gave him an annoyed look, "And what are the big leagues?"

"Improving Autobot opinion of you."

"Autobot opinion of me is just fine."

"Is it?" Miles asked sarcastically, "Because last I saw Ironhide says about five words to you and leaves."

"I..." Prowl gave what the teen was saying some serious thought, "Perhaps you are right. I noticed the correlation myself, between Ironhide's coldness and Will's ire towards me. And I have to admit they both have reason to be angry after my slip up in Oklahoma, though I was hoping Ironhide would get over it. But why have you decided to help me? If anything you should be angry about what Wheeljack and I did to you."

Miles shrugged, "Like I said, I can understand why you're not warm to humans. Doesn't mean I agree with your treatment of us, but I had to deal with it from Barricade initially, and though he has trouble actually calling us friends I think it's obvious that we are. I believe you just need to actually associate with humans on your own and you'll warm up to us."

"...Perhaps."

"And besides, I need something to do while I'm stuck on base indefinitely," Miles pointed out, and the SIC felt just a little bit bad about it. He hadn't know that Wheeljack was going to go so far.


	14. Chapter 13

That day Sam quickly realized it had been a bad decision to stay on the base. He had been torn between returning home and getting what candy he could from his parents or staying for his best friend, the latter eventually winning out. It wasn't until lunchtime in the cafeteria that a lot of people reminded him of what had happened the night before, much to his embarrassment and horror. He had known deep inside that the Megatron's and Startscream's had to be fake, but he had still panicked and nearly purged his tanks, as the Cybertronians would call it, after the fake Megatron had asked him to join in their fake sexcapades.

He glared moodily at Epps when the older man kept bringing it up just to annoy him. It was working perfectly and it didn't help that he had the worst headache from the alcohol he had drank the night before. He cursed his best human friend for being smart enough to forgo participating in any of it, wondering just where he had disappeared to when Bumblebee and Barricade joined Sam, Epps, and Mikaela at their table. The teen was slightly happy to note that Barricade looked as miserable as he felt, causing him to ask his Guardian if Cybertronians could get hangovers in the first place.

"It depends on the amount of high grade they've taken in," Bumblebee replied.

Sam looked harder at the Scout, noticing that he, too, looked a bit worse for wear. Even his holoform wasn't up to its usual perfect state, both Barricade and Bumblebee looking a little faded and just altogether nonexistent, clothes as plain as they could make them. It made him wonder if they'd both opted for a hologram instead.

"Ironhide's probably in an extremely bad mood right now, then." Mikaela remarked with a giggle.

Epps snorted, "Good thing we hid all of his ammo then!"

"That'll just make his mood worse," Sam pointed out. "And he already knows it was you who made him into a pumpkin. Miles even ratted out Jazz and Will, too."

"Oh…" Epps softly replied, only just realizing how true that was. "Well, slag."

Bumblebee laughed, "That about sums it up just right, Epps."

About that time Will came into the cafeteria, walking over to their table with an unnerved look. He stopped directly beside Epps.

"We have to wash the paint off Hide like now if we want to survive. I don't know what he's having Jazz do and I don't want to know, I just know I don't want to be doing it, too." The Captain said this more to the table at large, already pulling Epps out of his seat by his shirt collar and leading the Sergeant out of the cafeteria.

"Still think we should have somehow convinced Hide to dress up as the tooth fairy," Sam sighed wistfully.

"When Annabelle gets old enough we can have her help," Bumblebee replied with a smirk.

Barricade gave a small snort, "Oh, how the mighty have fallen to puny organics."

"Oh, like you're one to talk!" Bumblebee rolled his eyes, "Where's your kitty, hmm?"

"How should I know?" Barricade growled, "He's not actually my pet."

"Oh, I wouldn't say pet. You two were much too close last night for that to be true," Bumblebee said in a sing-song voice. "Dare say it you might actually be starting to show that you like him as a friend!"

That really set Barricade off, and Sam watched for a few minutes as the two sniped back and forth at each other. With both of them feeling slightly off it was no wonder they went at each other's throats so easily, though it annoyed him greatly to be a witness to it. The drinking had been Bumblebee's idea after all, and maybe it was because Barricade really did blame him for feeling bad that he was so ready to get mad at him or anything he might say. He was oddly grateful that Miles had up and disappeared after breakfast now, the last thing he wanted was for his friend to end up being hurt because Bumblebee couldn't stop himself from teasing Barricade and Barricade was too much of a child to admit that he could like organics, let alone Autobots.

Sighing heavily, the teen got up with Mikaela, and the two of them tossed the remainder of their food away before leaving the cafeteria and the arguing mechs behind. They decided to go to the med-bay, thinking that Miles may have been there because of his predicament or that they could at least find out what the medic had done to Sunstreaker and Sideswipe. Earlier that day the CMO had declared a mech hunt on the two and no one or 'bot had seen anything of them since.

"Found Sunny or Sides, yet?" Sam asked, stepping in to the med-bay while holding the door for Mikaela.

Only Ratchet and Wheeljack were in the med-bay, the place looking like a tornado had ripped through it. Which, when involving the twins, was entirely possible.

"No." Ratchet glared at them suspiciously, as if they may know where the two Frontliners were. "You two have now been assigned to help."

"Let me guess, Sunny and Sides?" Mikaela asked, stepping over a random data-pad on the floor.

Ratchet grumbled something under his breath in Cybertronian, nodding slightly to confirm the answer to Mikaela's question.

Sam whistled, "Daaaamn. They're so going to wish they were in the pit once they're found."

Mikaela laughed and Wheeljack nodded, causing Ratchet to throw a wrench at the poor inventor. The two teenagers got to work helping Ratchet clean up and reorganize what they could while Wheeljack worked on whatever Ratchet wanted him to work on, threatening him with wrenches if he complained about mistreatment by medics.

* * *

Sam groaned and put his face in his hands in a despairing motion. He was once again in the cafeteria, returning to it with Mikaela for dinner. Sam was sitting by Mikaela, dreading the moment that Miles might appear. It was surprisingly quiet in the room despite all the people, and the occasional Cybertronian in holoform. This was only because Bumblebee and Barricade had continued to fight, and it was steadily escalating in words and in pitch. There were the brave few who were whispering, either unperturbed by the argument or just not caring. Neither teen had spent much time with the Scout and the Decepticon Neutral, but Bumblebee had been keeping Sam updated on the fight through texts.

The Scout had found a large nerve and had set out to completely rip it to shreds, Barricade doing what he did best and getting angry and defensive. Bumblebee wanted the stubborn 'con to admit that he did like Miles as more than just a 'useful organic', that he actually thought as the teen as a friend and perhaps even a Charge, but Barricade was just too stubborn. It didn't help that Bumblebee had been attacking him in front of humans and Autobots alike, Barricade feeling trapped and threatened at seeming weak in front of so many.

Sam knew it was more than just the fight. It was weeks of tension between the two coming to a head, because while they had been playing nice so well it had been at a cost and it was hard to wipe away years of being enemies. And now it was just the fact of the matter. They had started arguing about something and both were too stubborn to stop until the other one did, so that meant it just never stopped.

"Just admit it you stubborn scrap heap!" Bumblebee snapped, Barricade having managed to snap his last thread of patience on the topic and moved him from attempting to keep them at a normal level to outright yelling.

Barricade snarled, "There's nothing to admit, you stupid Autodolt! He's just a convenience!"

Mikaela glared at Barricade, looking about ready to yell at the 'con until Sam stopped her, shaking his head. Neither saw Miles and Prowl come into the cafeteria, but both soon caught on to the sudden hush in the cafeteria as everyone but Bumblebee and Barricade shut up now. They just thought it was because Bumblebee had raised his voice.

Bumblebee and Barricade kept fighting, holoforms up and out of their seats and leaning across the table to glare at each other as they went back and forth. Miles and Prowl watched this in silence, the teenager not sure how to feel even as it quickly became obvious that he was part of what they were fighting over and the SIC just annoyed at the illogical behavior of the two Cybertronians and the scene they were causing in the middle of the cafeteria.

Mikaela decided to ignore Sam after awhile more of watching the fight. "Would you two idiots stop it? Miles could come in at any minute! This is the cafeteria for God's sake!"

"You're so slagging ridiculous!" Bumblebee actually growled as he ignored Mikaela, "You're basically already his Guardian!"

Mikaela opened her mouth to retort, but heard a gasp from Sam and looked at him to see his gaze elsewhere. She followed the look to see what had made him react like that, only to see Miles and Prowl. She desperately tried to get Barricade's attention to stop him from replying, but she was too late.

"Get it through that thick metal plating of yours, Autobot! I'm not his Guardian, I'm not his friend! Pit, I like _Blurr_ better than him and that mech would sooner kill me then look me in the optics!" Barricade snarled, "He was just a convenience in the time I needed one, I wouldn't even call him a socket! It's hardly my fault that I'm forced to continue to associate with him here because he's friends with your own precious organic, I would have preferred to drop all contact with him when I came here! I would never want to be his Guardian!"

"Oh, good." Prowl allowed his voice to travel across the already nearly silent cafeteria. "I was already considering taking Miles on as my Charge, this just cements my decision."

Barricade and Bumblebee turned in unison to glare at Prowl, even the Scout about ready to tell him off for cutting into their fight, when they noticed Miles standing just a bit in front of the SIC. Bumblebee felt almost immediately guilty as he looked at the teen, opening his mouth to say something before deciding against it. He glanced warily at Barricade, noticing the 'con seemed to be just as shocked as he was by their appearance. Both had been too invested in their fight to pay much attention to their surroundings.

The teen was trying his best to keep a straight face, to show that he didn't care, and that made the Scout feel even worse. Wheeljack really had done an incredible job with the implants, the ears giving the teen away immediately as they were laying flat against his skull and hair lining his tail seemed to be puffed up.

"I trust you two sparklings will find somewhere more suitable to fight now that the question of his Guardianship can no longer be put upon Barricade?" Prowl asked dryly, shaming both of them with one simple question. Then, when neither replied, he glared at them both. "Well?"

"Yes, Prowl." Bumblebee muttered lowly, feeling as if he was nothing more than a sparkling again and getting in trouble for doing something stupid.

"Excellent," Prowl replied. He then turned Miles around and pushed the teen out of the cafeteria quickly.

* * *

Once they were out of the cafeteria, Prowl let his holoform disappear, quickly picking Miles up before he could say anything. The teen stayed silent as the Tactician walked them to one of the only vending machines still on the base. He was set down in front of it carefully.

"You're not serious, right?" Miles asked, giving Prowl an incredulous look. "Sam and I pigged out on so much junk food last night that _Bumblebee_ threatened us."

"Bumblebee has a bit more to be concerning himself with right now then what you decide to gorge yourself on," Prowl replied, although he still glanced around for Ratchet. "This way you won't need to get food from the cafeteria while those overgrown sparklings are still inside of it."

Miles shrugged, "Can't say I'm going to out right refuse junk food as long as the Hatchet isn't around."

He dug in his pockets for his wallet, then fed the machine his money. Glancing over the available selections he quickly chose a bag of Cheetos, retrieving it and leaning against a wall as he opened the bag and began to eat it. He wasn't going to subject Prowl to crumbs of cheesy goodness.

"I honestly have to say I am surprised over how they acted," Prowl said after a few minutes, watching Miles crumble up the empty bag and toss it in a trash can.

"Even you walking super computers can say stupid things that you don't mean every once in awhile," Miles responded, wiping his hands on his pants. "Probably."

"Even if you think he didn't mean it, it still has to…" Prowl trailed off, picking Miles up. Cybertronians and humans may be similar emotionally, but that didn't know he meant how to deal with one if they were upset.

"Hurt?" Miles filled in, then gave a small snort. "Yeah, but Barry can be an ass. Doesn't mean I'm just going to forgive him, though. Cuz mark my words, that fucker's gonna realize he needs me."

Prowl gave a thoughtful hum, "It will be hard to prove that when you will both be on base and largely in the same social circles. Luckily, you'll be sticking with me for the most part, anyway.

"Does that mean I can cheer myself up by tripping your glitch?" Miles asked, though the usual grin wasn't in place. He allowed Prowl to pick him up and set him on his shoulder.

Prowl vented softly, "No."

"Aw, but it'd make me happy!" Miles whined, but this got him no response. He huffed, "So what's this about the Guardian thing?"

"What do you mean?" Prowl asked, glancing at the teenager on his shoulder in confusion.

"Well I always thought it was just a Bee 'n Hide thing because they had actually been with Sam and Will in battle, or something, and like maybe they had defended them?" Miles replied, "No one ever actually explained it to me."

"Certainly not." Prowl paused, thinking it over. "In the English language there is two meanings to guardian. Like your parents would be your legal guardians, and then the act of actually guarding someone. That is the closest thing we could get to what our guardian means."

"Okaaay, bit more explanation needed there."

Prowl vented softly, "It is a relationship between one Cybertronian and then one non-Cybertronian, like Sam and Bumblebee. Through it the charge would become… an honorary Cybertronian, you could say. This way the Guardian wouldn't normally have to worry about the fuss of the other species over their chosen. With your government it helps give us a little bit more lee way with you civilians, which is one reason I plan on telling Optimus I'll become your Guardian. Most Guardians will risk their lives for their Charges, a deep bond usually needing to be in place for a non-Cybertronian to be honored in such a way. It is meant to show how close a Cybertronian is to a person of a non-Cybertronian species as we can not properly bond with another species."

"So it's like a combination of the two English uses?" Miles asked, snorting. "You stupid computers are too confusing."

"The Guardian can take precedence over others concerning the Charge," Prowl continued, ignoring Miles. "Even some of their higher ups. Like Bumblebee would take precedence over me concerning Sam, and I wouldn't have a say if he wanted to take Sam somewhere that I didn't agree with. However, Optimus Prime and Ratchet would be able to tell him no."

"This sounds a bit like…" Miles trailed off, sure Prowl would understand.

"Most Cybertronians, like Bumblebee, let the Charge have a large say in their relationship. In fact, being the Charge of a Cybertronian is a respected position, immediately earning the respect of most mechs and femmes by what it could mean. A Cybertronian pet, or slave, is a…" He hesitated a moment, remembering Barricade had used the word. "A socket."

"Oh." Miles replied, then paused. "_Oh._" He repeated as he remembered where he had heard it.

Prowl nodded, deciding that path didn't need to be gone down just yet. "Some other reasons I would like to be your guardian are that I do need to get better acquainted with this planet and you can explain anything I don't understand. We'll be spending a lot of time together because of this new alliance anyway, so people will just chalk it up to us being a new bonded pair. Out of all the humans I've spent the most time with you, and if anything you help me with my glitch because I have to adjust to how illogical you can be."

"If you want to sign yourself up for your early demise, be my guest, Prowler." Miles said, grinning. "But don't use bonded pair again. Sounds like we're dating or something."

"I'll try not to." He said dryly, narrowing his optics.

* * *

It was surprisingly easy to start their plan against the twins after Prowl told Optimus that he would be Miles' Guardian. The Prime had no reason to disagree, especially not when the reason he would have previously had disappeared that day when he was told about the argument Barricade and Bumblebee had gotten into. He figured that his SIC had his own reasons, but Miles was fine with it, so he didn't care all that much. It had also been surprisingly easy for Miles to avoid Barricade. This was mainly because Barricade was also trying to avoid the teen, leading the mech to essentially go back into hiding in his hangar. Bumblebee gave the teen a sincere apology, though he still got chewed out quite thoroughly by Mikaela and Sam for being so stupid.

When Prowl innocently suggested having a military camping trip to teach Miles how to survive out in the wild, as well as Sam if he wanted, the suggestion was taken and looked at. It was decided that the suggestion would be done, especially when Bumblebee had said something about seeing if he could get the school to let the teen's off the hook for a little bit since it was technically a learning expenditure. Miles would need all the relief he could from school since he could only do so much of the work while not there.

Optimus wanted two extra mechs to go along with them for safety measures, deciding that something akin to pulling names out of a hat was the fairest way to do it. He didn't know that Prowl then rigged it so Sunstreaker and Sideswipe would be the mechs selected to go. While Sam had opted out of the camping trip, mainly so he could try to talk to Barricade, Will and Ironhide had decided to go on it as well.

On the days leading up to the camping trip, Miles and Prowl planned and gathered supplies. Prowl would be going a day ahead of time to search the area for anything significantly dangerous, like Decepticons, and would be setting up the beginnings of the plan. They had to find a forest far enough away where all the trees would be taller than the Cybertronians that were going.

It was a week into November when they finally went on the trip. Miles had rode up in Ironhide with Will since Prowl was already at their selected camping spot waiting for them. It didn't take long at all for the Captain to show Miles how to pitch a tent and best set up the logs to start a fire. Once he was done Miles went to Prowl, the SIC giving the twins the suggestion of going and looking for more firewood. Will and Ironhide agreed and the twins were sent away. Will and Ironhide went to hunt, fish, or whatever they planned to do to collect food, leaving Miles and Prowl to keep the fire going.

Will, Ironhide, Sunstreaker, and Sideswipe were under the impression that Prowl would continue to teach Miles some good wilderness survival skills, but instead they spent their time talking.

"How's it gonna go down?" Miles asked softly, speaking lowly just in case anyone might come back.

"I have a holoform there waiting for them. You'll be able to watch later when we get back to base. I might be a bit out of it, but if Ironhide and Will get back sooner than I do then just tell them I went into a light recharge." Prowl instructed, leaning against a tough tree.

Miles nodded. He waited for awhile, poking at the fire and throwing random things in it to see how they burned. Prowl eventually sat upright again, but didn't say anything just yet. Miles looked at him curiously, deciding it best not to say anything if Prowl wasn't. He heard the twins coming before he saw them, the nanobots already having succeeded in making his hearing slightly better much to Wheeljack's pleasure and Ratchet's annoyance. He watched with a bit of amusement as they raced into the clearing where camp was set up.

"Prowl-!" Sideswipe began, only to be cut off by Sunstreaker.

"There was this thing, and then we destroyed this thing, and then something happened! And Sideswipe scratched my paint!" Sunstreaker exclaimed.

Miles put a hand over his mouth to keep from snorting. He enjoyed the description that Sunstreaker gave, but Prowl just acted annoyed.

"If you destroyed something attempt to go fix it, at least." Prowl ordered, not even bothering to actually look at them.

"But we think we made something angry!" Sideswipe protested.

Miles put on a worried face, "There was someone there who saw you? We can't have you guys being found out just yet."

"No, no one saw us!" Sunstreaker cut in, stopping Sideswipe before he could say something once again. "We aren't stupid enough for that."

"Then _what_ did you make angry?" Prowl asked.

The twins looked at each other, then back to Prowl.

"We don't know!"

Miles tried not to grin, knowing it was his turn to further the prank. "What did you destroy?"

"It'll be easier if we show you." Sideswipe said, picking Miles up and holding him as Sunstreaker activated a very basic hologram of where they had been and what they had destroyed.

"That looks Native American to me, must have been there for awhile. Sam and me had to learn about them in elementary school. I can't remember what that thing is called, or what tribe had it, but there was a legend that whoever destroyed one would be cursed by the spirits." He laughed, then, waving a hand through the hologram to make it disperse. "I always enjoyed Native American legends, they were so inventive."

He pretended not to notice Sunstreaker and Sideswipe look at each other with wide optics.

"You don't think any of it's true, do you?" Sideswipe asked tentatively.

"The legends? Oh no, I don't believe a word of them. Some, like this one, could be pretty gruesome, though." Miles replied as Sideswipe set him back down.

The twins silently conversed with each other over their private comm link as Miles scrambled up Prowl's leg and sat so he was leaning against some of Prowl's chest plates. It was just waiting at this point to see if the twins took the bait.

"Do you think you could get us that information you researched, Miles?" Sideswipe finally asked.

"Those odd ancestors of yours have gotten our interest." Sunstreaker added quickly, because of course they couldn't seem like they were afraid or might think they were targeted by a curse.

"Sure." Miles said, glancing up at Prowl with the barest of smirks. Phase B would be put into action soon.

* * *

They had just returned from the camping trip. Miles was on the phone with his parents, because despite the fact they could get reception with any of the Cybertronians there to hook them up, Will had said no as it wouldn't have been the real experience, then. Prowl walked in to the rec-room, seeing Bumblebee, Sam, Barricade, Jazz, and Epps.

As the teenager had been gone for a few days, the 'con had decided it safe enough to wander out from his hangar again. It helped that Sam had been annoying him without pause to apologize to his friend, although Barricade refused and no one was surprised by it. The 'con now sat in a lazy boy recliner, the other four sitting on one of the couches. Jazz and Bumblebee were competing in Mario Kart, Epps and Sam cheering their preferred 'bots on as Prowl walked closer, standing beside the couch. Miles soon came into the room, shoving the phone back into his pocket. Unknowingly he was scrutinized by Barricade and Sam respectively. They both noticed the odd look on his face, like he was torn between amusement and disbelief.

"What's up, buddy?" Sam asked, pretending not to notice the way Barricade tensed up as Miles moved closer to all of them.

"Sam…" For a moment he looked at a loss of words, not even glancing at Barricade. "I need you to teach me how to drive."

For a moment everyone froze, Epps and Sam looking at Miles with wide disbelieving eyes. Bumblebee quickly paused the game, joining Jazz in giving Miles an incredulous look. Prowl and Barricade both shared a look of confusion before they seemed to catch themselves and went back to looking as monotone as possible.

"Wait, what?" Sam asked stupidly, continuing to stare at his friend.

Miles rolled his eyes, "My parents got me a car. Like the non-sentient kind. And you know what sucks? We both wanted cars so bad, but they pale in comparison to having a giant alien robot as a chauffeur. And since I've always been chauffeured instead of actually driving them, I just never learned. My parents think I know because I told them Officer Ticon was letting me drive his patrol car one time."

Sam had at least known how to drive before Bumblebee had revealed himself, having driven the mech home and with Mikaela inside of him. It made sense that Barricade and Prowl had never bothered letting Miles actually take control of them before, mainly because he knew they were alive and had no problem letting them do the work.

"You never told us you didn't know how to drive, Miles." Prowl said, slightly surprised. He had never imagined that the teenager hadn't learned just yet.

"Well it seemed kind of… personal, I guess. I've only ever been in the driver's seat of moving Cybertronians, never a non-sentient car unless it was stationary. I mean, I would technically be in control of your body in a way, even if you could take control back easily it would still be weird." Miles replied, pausing for a moment as he thought. "I've mainly only been behind the wheel of you and Barricade. Once with Bumblebee when he brought me to see Blurr. All of those times you guys just drove."

Sam glanced between the Decepticon Neutral and his best human friend, noticing how he had said Barricade's full name instead of his affectionate nickname for the 'con. He tried not to sigh, realizing his friend was going to stay angry unless Barricade himself talked to him, and he wasn't sure if the mech would do that any time soon. For now, at least, it would seem like the two's relationship would stay uneasily at the edge of a metaphorical cliff.

"I believe none of us would mind teaching you if you asked," Prowl responded, Bumblebee and Jazz nodding at his statement.

"I don't know about that." Epps said, an amused grin on his face. "That'd be worse than a back seat driver. A driver that's all around you and could get pissed if you do something wrong badly enough to get them dented, or could just decide to kill you."

"I highly doubt any of us would yell or threaten him." Prowl retorted, then glanced at Barricade as if he was a last minute thought. "Well, most of us, anyway."

Barricade scowled, and Epps continued on as if Prowl hadn't said anything. "Still. Just the knowledge that you're sorta in control of another's body could freak the kid out, not to mention over half of you would baby him and not tell him if he does something wrong."

"I agree with Epps, I'd prefer to learn with a non-sentient car." Miles cut in.

"Non-sentient cars are dangerous!" Bumblebee exclaimed, surprising Jazz and Epps by speaking up at all over the matter.

"I can't believe I'm saying it, but I agree with the insect and tight ass here." Barricade added in gruffly.

Sam laughed, "And you guys are safe? Some how I think we could find more interesting ways for a Cybertronian to kill a human on accident, never even going near on purpose, compared to a car where it'd be running over the person or they were in an accident."

"Ah agree wit' tha squishies, Bee 'n Prowler." Jazz replied before Bumblebee could protest anymore, "Ah think tha' Mahles should learn with a non-sentient vehicle."

"Ha!" Miles grinned triumphantly at Bumblebee, "That's four against you and Prowl, I think we win."

Whether he purposefully or accidentally left Barricade out Sam couldn't tell, so he just shook his head. "Did they say what kind of car they got you?"

"No, but I heard mom muttering in the background about it being a metal death trap. Kind of like Judy when your dad got you Bee." Miles teased, still grinning.

"I was not a metal death trap, thank you very much!" Bumblebee replied indignantly.

"Even I have to admit you looked like one, Bee." Sam laughed.

"For all the world it seems like you guys like to look good. Holoforms, your vehicle alt mode of choice," Miles' smirk grew, "Except your first one, Bee. Every time I think of that it just ruins the whole idea."

Bumblebee huffed, "I'm never taking either of you anywhere again."

"Miles will have his own car, so if you hold out on me I won't need you!" Sam snickered.

"Ohh, gonna be cheated on with a non-sentient, Bee." Jazz laughed as well, "How does tha' make ya feel?"

Bumblebee grumbled under his breath, but didn't give them a reply. Jazz and Sam shared a laugh at his expense.

"If it makes you feel any better, non-sentients are soooo last year." Miles drawled, grinning. "I have half the mind to call my parents up and demand a Cybertronian instead."

"Hey, maybe your new car will pull a Bee." Sam suggested.

"Primus, I hope not." Miles replied, laughing. "I still remember that phone call you gave me! You sounded insane. Besides, there's enough of you Cybertronians running around as it is."

"That was when I thought Bee was pulling a Christine or Satan's Camaro, not giant alien robot from outer space." Sam grumbled good naturedly.

Miles laughed, "See, you were worried your first car was alive and what to do about it. I'm going to be worried about mine not being alive and what to do about it. Find myself treating it like a Cybertronian, probably talk to it and name it."

"You gotta bring it here so we can help you name it!" Epps exclaimed, "Maybe we could even use it to haze the newbies. Say it's like that Mountain Dew Dispenser thing and it's extremely sensitive since it can only be a car and that's it."

"Hey, there's one thing you should be thankful for." Bumblebee cut in, laughing lightly. "Cade never opened the door for you so you aren't used to that. I've seen Will get angry at a non-sentient car for not opening the door until he remembered it was non-sentient."

"I remember that!" Miles snorted, "And I'll always buckle. Barricade very rarely buckled me up, but he'd always remind me to because it's the law."

Sam was the only one to notice that Miles never talked directly at the 'con or even seemed to acknowledge his existence at all. He knew he wasn't the only one to keep looking between the two, though, because he caught both Bumblebee and Prowl doing it several times, as if waiting for something to happen.

"Tha only trouble ya might' 'ave is following' the speed limit." Jazz said, grinning.

"Yeah, you guys definitely have issues obeying those." Sam replied, laughing. "I actually think it'd be good if we all have a crash course on non-sentient cars for those who have been around the Cybertronians the longest."

"Everyone in NEST is going to be so screwed up with non-sentient cars. I know I treat mine like it's alive. Haven't named it just yet, thankfully." Epps added, turning off the game Jazz and Bumblebee had been playing.

"My dad and me can teach you when we go back home." Sam offered, then paused at he glanced at Miles' ears. "Well, when you return home, or get a hat that covers those things effectively."

"Speaking of those, are the nanobots doing anything?" Epps asked. "I asked the Hatchet but he said patient doctor confidentiality bullshit."

"I can see in the dark better and my hearing's improved." Miles admitted with a shrug. "Maybe some other crap, but I haven't noticed it yet."

"Personally I'm hoping you at least keep the ears. They make you look so cute." Sam teased, grinning when Miles glared at him.

Miles huffed, "I'll make sure to tell Wheeljack to make you a pair then."

"Order a pair for Will too, would you?" Epps asked with a snicker, "I'd love to see Sarah's face when she saw 'em."

"Maybe it'll spice up their sex life. Have him as a big strong lion." Miles suggested, grinning as Sam and Epps burst out laughing.

"I remember the first time Ironhide heard them doing it." Epps said lowly, glancing around to make sure that Ironhide and Will were no where in sight. "He panicked because he thought Will was hurting her and had gone insane, so he transformed and broke open the window. Needless to say he got the birds and the bees talk, and was thus banned to the end of the driveway for a month."

Miles started to crack up and Sam just continued to laugh. It was then that Sideswipe and Sunstreaker came into the rec-room, quickly going over to the blonde teen. They looked slightly uncomfortable, and just grabbed Miles by the arm, attempting to drag him out.

"Hey, what?" Miles asked, confused for a brief second as he struggled against them.

"We need that information," Sideswipe stated.

"What? Oh!" Miles exclaimed, looking back to the others to see Prowl winking at him. "I was busy talking! Can't it wait?"

"No." Sunstreaker growled, dragging Miles out of the room.

Barricade looked to Prowl, "What the slag was that about?"

"Nothing important." Prowl replied calmly.

"Nothing important my aft. It's the twins, they don't kidnap people for no reason." Barricade growled.

"_I'm_ his Guardian, if you would take a moment to remember that, Barricade." Prowl's doorwings hitched up into an annoyed 'v' as he glared at the 'con, "I'm not worried about it. It hardly matters that you appear to be, for whatever reason you care to give, as he is _not_ your concern, which you made quite clear a few days ago, if you recall. Now if you'll all excuse me, I have work to do."

He quickly left, not bothering to look to see what his words may have done. Sam winced when he heard Barricade snarl, looking at the 'con to say something only to watch him disappear out of sight.

Sam sighed, "How quickly do you think this thing will work out?"

"Decepticon stubbornness going up against teenager stubbornness?" Epps asked, shrugging. "Don't have a slaggin' clue."

The others just nodded their heads in agreement.

* * *

A few more days passed and Wheeljack was finally able to remove the ears and tail. Miles was put on bed rest for the entirety of the day to make sure that there was no repercussions. While he was thankful for their removal, Ratchet hadn't been able to figure out anything for the nanobots yet and had talked about nothing else the entire time he had been in the med-bay. Finally the teen had gotten fed up and told the CMO that they didn't matter, that he was viewing it the same way Wheeljack was since they weren't doing anything but benefiting him, and that the mech could put his energies elsewhere finally.

In celebration of Miles being freed from the cat paraphernalia and the med-bay, they decided to have Saturday be horror movie night. It was already late and Sam, Miles, Mikaela, Maggie, Will, Epps, Jazz, Bumblebee, Inferno, Barricade, Prowl, and Ironhide were in the human rec-room, watching Dawn of the Dead. Sam and Mikaela were sitting side by side in the Lazy Boy with Bumblebee and Barricade at their feet, Miles was in between Inferno and Prowl, and Will, Maggie, Epps, Jazz, and Ironhide sat on one couch together. Most of them were surprised when Sunstreaker and Sideswipe burst in to the room.

"Barricade, Prowl! Miles, he-" Sunstreaker started, but Sideswipe cut him off.

"He just died! We couldn't even do anything!" Sideswipe exclaimed, both sounding more than a bit hysterical.

"Oh, that's right," Miles said sarcastically, causing the two to notice him and stare at him in shock. "I forgot all about dying and you two not being able to do anything about it!"

They stared at him in shock.

"But you-! But-!" They said as one.

Sam laughed, "Miles has been with us all day."

Us was Mikaela, Barricade, Jazz, Bumblebee, Prowl, and Epps. They might not be on talking terms, but that didn't mean they hadn't been in each other's company. Barricade had grown used to associating with everyone that Miles did by this point, even seeming to forgive the Scout and being on speaking terms with him again. It didn't help that even if the two weren't currently talking a lot of people, and Cybertronians, just expected them to be together at this point.

"Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, what do you hope to achieve with this lie?" Prowl asked, ignoring the grin Miles gave him.

"But we're not lying!" They protested together, "He really did!"

"Get it on video?" Maggie asked, not necessarily jumping to their defense but not disbelieving them either. "There's cameras in every hall, and on the outside of the buildings."

"Yeah!" They exclaimed, grabbing Miles and practically carrying him out of the room. "We'll show you that you did!"

"I don't want to see that!" Miles protested weakly, knowing he had no chance of escaping one, let alone both of them.

He sent a pleading look over his shoulder, though it was mostly aimed at Prowl, who he was sure had gotten him into this. Sam, Prowl, Barricade, and Bumblebee got up and followed the twins as they carried Miles down the hall between them. They walked to the control room, Prowl taking over and asking the twins where and when. He accessed the file and brought up the recording, playing it until it suddenly went white with static. They could still hear the twins on the video, yelling at each other and at Miles.

"Oh, haha, very nice, you guys." Sam said sarcastically, ready to turn to glare at them but stopped when the recording fuzzed out slightly and showed the blurry shapes of Sunstreaker and Sideswipe in bipedal form with a smaller shape near them. "Used a holoform to stay consistent, cool."

"But, we didn't…" Their protest's were weak by this point, "It was…"

Miles shared a look with Prowl before turning back to the twins, "That's _almost_ funny. I would be laughing if you would have used what I told you on Sam, but he doesn't remember it that much anyway."

"Bee would freak out so badly on your afts." Sam snorted, knowing only that Miles was messing with the twins.

"We wouldn't fake your death. We'd really kill you." Sunstreaker snorted, Sideswipe nodding in agreement.

That seemed to be the wrong thing to say because Bumblebee proceeded to chase both of them out of the room, yelling half-hearted threats after them. Sam snickered, watching as Miles leaned up against Prowl and whispered in his holoform's ear, a clear indication that the mech was probably involved as well. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Barricade looking rather forlorn. He knew it was probably over whatever Miles was doing to mess with the twins, but he was fairly sure Barricade didn't.

"Okay, you have got to show me what the fuck you did to them, and tell me how! You were with me the whole time!" Miles hissed softly into Prowl's ear, barely speaking at all knowing that Prowl would be able to pick it up.

"Patience," Prowl chuckled, "We have company."

"That sounds… wrong." Sam said, desperately trying not to laugh.

"Jealous, Samuel?" Miles teased with a grin.

"You know it, babe." Sam replied, laughing. Prowl gave them both a look and left the room, muttering just loud enough for them to hear him complaining about illogical human teenagers. They both laughed at him.

Miles looked at Sam and winked, "Don't worry, I'll show you the video once we're done putting it all together."

And just like that Miles was gone, giving chase after Prowl. Sam snorted, turning to give Barricade a stern look.

"You don't get to throw a hissy and pretend you loathe him and then get jealous when he buddies up with some other mech," Sam informed him. "You abandoned him, not the other way around. Don't act like you're the one left out on the curb when you know there's ways to make it better for yourself."

Barricade glared at him and Sam held his ground, narrowing his eyes right back at the 'con. Finally he just snorted and dissolved his holoform, leaving the teen unsure whether or not anything he had said actually stuck.


	15. Chapter 14

It had been nearly a week since Miles and Sam had been on base. After the ears and tail had been removed, Miles had quickly been shipped back to his home town to catch up on all the school work he had missed. Somehow it just didn't hold the appeal of spending the day with beings thousands of years older than his home planet, so he had gone over to Sam's to sulk with his friend.

Now he was sitting on his bed, glaring up at his ceiling as if it had personally offended him. Sam was sitting at his computer, on the chat network for the NEST base. It was something that Maggie and Glen had worked together to carefuly code, seperate from AIM and MSN although it provided a similar chat based option. They called it NBEC as a joke, Non-biological Extraterrestrial Chatting. Someone had even taken NBE-1 as a username until Optimus had forced them to get rid of it. Only those connected to NEST with high clearance could access it outside of the base, Bumblebee making sure that his teen and his friends could do so.

Miles' car was out sitting at the curb, thankfully non-sentient. Between Bob and Sam it had safely been made sure that he could, in fact, drive and afterwards he had spent an hour just checking out the inside for a Decepticon or Autobot insignia. When he didn't find one he got out and talked to the hood. When he didn't have an answer he assumed it wasn't alive, but he made sure to have Bumblebee scan it just in case. Bumblebee confirmed that it was just a regular car.

"Hey Miles, get over here. Ratchet has a job for us!" Sam called to his friend, scooting away from the computer a bit so Miles could see the screen too. Miles came over and quickly peered at the screen.

**Wrench_Medic: Samuel****, I require your assistance.**  
**LadiesMan217: ****Yeah? Miles is here too. He in?**  
**Wrench_Medic: ****That is fine.**  
**LadiesMan217: ****Okay, he's looking. What's up?**  
**Wrench_Medic: ****Wheeljack's been acting oddly. I'm sure it involves work because he's been getting less and less recharge time in, however he's leaving the base. It's not at the lab and I do not know where he is going. He can tell if another 'bot is coming up on him.**  
**LadiesMan217: ****Whatcha want us to do?**  
**Wrench_Medic: ****As Miles' car is non-sentient he would not be able to sense it tracking him as well. He'd notice it if it was close enough, yes, but if you stay far enough back it should work.**  
**LadiesMan217: ****(Miles typing) First off, still say you should've gone for theHatchet on here, but whatev. Second off, ask the twins if they still have those trackers.**  
**_-Wrench_Medic is away_****  
****_-Wrench_Medic has returned_**  
**Wrench_Medic: ****They say they do, those little fraggers.**  
**LadiesMan217: ****(Miles duh) Hey, don't get pissy at them just yet. They'll help us find out where Wheeljack's going. Tell them to plant it on him.**  
**Wrench_Medic: ****Affirmative.**  
**LadiesMan217: ****We'll let Wheeljack go for three times, make sure he's always going to the same place. Then we'll wait till he leaves and then go to that place ourselves in Sasha.**  
**Wrench_Medic: ****Sasha?**  
**LadiesMan217: ****(Miles here again 3) My car. Scrubs reference. You should watch that show, it's based on human medicine. I think you'd love it.**  
**Wrench_Medic: ****Oh. Perhaps I will give it a try. Thank you, I'll send the information to you after it's been collected each time. Have a nice night.**  
_**-Wrench_Medic has logged off**_

"Scrubs?" Sam asked in exasperation as he leaned back in his computer chair, "Really?"

Miles shrugged, "I like the show. Spread the love."

"What do you think Jack's up to?" Sam asked, logging off NBEC before Bumblebee realized he'd be staying up past bedtime and not getting the eight hours of sleep he needed. The Autobot could find other ways to annoy him to go to sleep, but he'd handle those later.

"Frag if I know, man. It's Jack. His last big project ended up giving me cat ears and tail," Miles pointed out. "I'm almost afraid to find out. It's Tuesday so if they get it on by tonight or tomorrow morning we should be good to go Friday or Saturday."

Sam opened his mouth to reply, but was stopped as a car horn blared loudly. He opened his window and leaned out. "It's guys night, Bee. We're not going to sleep! That's lame!"

Bumblebee only honked his horn again in reply, showing that he very much did not care what type of night it was.

"Remember when you were up for about three nights straight because you had that major math test that counted for most of your grade?" Miles inquired with a smirk, "I had come over half because Mikaela had sent me to try to annoy you to bed, and half to help you to study."

Sam sighed deeply, "Yeah. Bee got his holoform out and manhandled me into bed, then held me there until I gave in and fell asleep."

"I really don't think he'd be against doing that again." Miles stated, "And they can make more then one at a time. I don't feel like being mahandled by _your_ Autobot."

Sam got up out of the chair and headed for his bed, then paused. "Wait, they can? Since when?"

"Since always, apparently. They just don't because it takes up too tiring to have two holoforms that can feel, smell, touch, etc and focus on both of them so they're both receiving all that sensory input at the same time. It's easier to have a holoform and hologram, but even that's supposedly over doing it." Miles replied, grabbing his pajama pants out of his back pack and putting them on.

"So is that what Prowl did to the twins?" Sam asked, changing into his own pajamas.

"Hologram wise, yeah." Miles smirked, then proceeded to jump on to Sam's bed and fight his friend for it. They only stopped when Bee honked his horn again.

* * *

The two had everything they needed ready to go by Friday. Thanks to the trackers, Ratchet was able to locate just where Wheeljack kept going. He had gone to the same place twice already, and he went there Friday night, too. It was a couple of hours away, a place in Nevada that actually had a bit of forest to it. The surrounding area where he had stopped was deserted, nothing but old factory buildings sitting there.

The teens had driven themselves to base in Miles' car, getting filled in on everything and a map from the CMO. Ratchet promised to set Wheeljack to work on something that would last him awhile and make sure he wouldn't go to wherever he was going to Saturday night.

They weren't expecting much trouble on base, but it was early Saturday that was the most trying for both of them. It seemed Barricade had finally had enough of the awkwardness and had asked to talk to Miles later that night, an obvious hint that he was probably going to apologize, but Miles wouldn't be there for it. Sam wasn't sure who had more trouble with that idea: Miles because he had to deliver that blow then run off, or Barricade because his apology was essentially just brushed off by an organic.

That, more than anything, was the main reason Miles and Sam set out as early as they did. They had originally been planning to leave at sunset, but now they were leaving before lunch, with a promise to call Ratchet when they arrived to let him know that they were safe.

They figured out quickly that wherever they were going wasn't going to have civilization anywhere near it, so they stopped and ate a quick lunch, Miles seeming to suddenly be in the mood to complain about everything now that he could no longer just make up with Barricade and had probably ruined any chances of it happening any time soon, driving Sam up the wall with his behavior.

After that it didn't take them too long to find where Wheeljack had been going, in part because Sam sped up to make them get there faster once they knew it was only through back roads where cops were unlikely to be. They came upon huge abandoned factory that looked like it had seen better days. There were several buildings, actually.

The one in the middle was the biggest and it looked like the doors had been bashed down, so they decided to start there. Sam fired off a text to Ratchet so the medic would know they were there and wouldn't worry. They entered the building then, stumbling around blindly because even though it was still light out the inside of the factory was incredibly black. They both cursed because neither of them had thought to bring a flashlight.

Miles was just slightly luckier in that Wheeljack's nanobots had improved the whatever in his eyes enough to aid him some, allowing him to walk around without tripping all over the place like Sam was. He figured Sam would be smart enough to eventually take out and use his phone as a light until he heard a loud thump and cussing.

"Fuck!" Sam cussed, scrambling back up. "I tripped over... a wire? It was plugged into the wall."

"Not plugged in anymore." Miles replied, moving closer to look at it with his friend before shrugging. "Doubt it's important, it's just a plug. This place is abandoned, what could it have even been plugged into that would still be working at this point?"

Sam shrugged as well and they continued searching for anything that might turn the lights on, or a hint at what Wheeljack had been up to. They both froze when they heard a loud roar, followed by several loud thumps. They looked at each other with wide eyes, both trying to think of explanations for what they had just heard.

"We really need to find those lights," Miles muttered, "And if we can't find them I say we just get the fuck outta dodge, because that sure as shit doesn't sound good."

Sam nodded his agreement and Miles took the lead, looking for anything that looked like it might turn on the lights. He was praying for a light switch, but if he would have welcomed a nice looking lever or some buttons. He didn't notice when Sam stopped following him until he heard Sam squeak.

"M-Miles?" Sam squeaked, and it could really only be defined as that. High pitched, laced with fear and sounding worried.

Miles turned quickly to see what was wrong, stumbling backwards in shock as a large shape darted down from the ceiling and grabbed Sam. Sam screamed, the thing spreading it's wings and flying up, breaking through the ceiling and sending pieces of rafter falling down on him. As the creature flew out into the open sky Miles saw that it was almost completely metallic, though he was unable to make out anything more than it had Sam grasped in it's claws.

"SAM!" Miles yelled, but it was useless and he knew it.

He stared up at the hole in the ceiling where the thing had flown out with Sam, trying to think of anything he could do to help his friend. There was no way he could follow the thing, it was long gone and he wasn't even that fast, nor did he know what direction it had taken Sam in. He would have thought it to be one of Soundwave's cassetticons if it hadn't been so much larger, able to lift Sam so easily.

He realized with a shock that he was alone, totally and completely. Sam had been taken by something and needed help, but Miles had no idea what to do. He had never felt so afraid, alone, and unsure in his life. At least when he had been facing Ravage he had people around he trusted and knew well, people he knew that could and would take a bullet for him. Now he had no one but himself, and he was just a weak little human. Not even military strong or smart.

He knew he was beginning to panic and that it was probably the worst thing he could do, so he took a few deep breaths and shoved his fears away as much as he could. He looked around for anything of use, freezing when his heightened hearing picked up movement outside the factory. He heard the same roar from before just as something slammed into the factory wall as if it was trying to get in, the siding near him bulging from the pressure.

He ran.

* * *

Barricade, Prowl, Bumblebee, Ratchet, Jazz, Ironhide, Will, and Epps were in the conference room, one of the few places that could hold so many mechs all in their bipedal mode. Ratchet was trying his hardest not to worry about the two organics he'd sent off on a private mission. He'd gotten a text from them half an hour before that they'd gotten there, but after that there'd been nothing. He'd even called Sam and the teen hadn't picked up. After his fears had grown he had summoned all of them into the same room because he imagined that, should something actually be amiss, they would be among those most likely to receive a call from either teen.

He had told them all why, of course. Bumblebee had already known somewhat, the others being completely in the dark about it. As Ratchet had promised the teens, he had long ago pulled rank and forced Wheeljack into recharge, so it would have been useless to try to question him. His medical overrides wouldn't allow the scientist to wake up until the next day around noon, and even he would have trouble bypassing them.

Right now they were just gossiping, having nothing else to do at this odd time of night just after dinner. The medic's attention was drawn to Epps as the Sergeant let out a surprised exclamation.

"Whoa, the Allspark shard was seriously missing?" Epps asked from his perch on Jazz's leg.

Prowl nodded, "It was. The footage had been tampered with and whoever took it left no traces behind. They returned it soon after, however."

"How long ago was this?" Ironhide growled, Will sitting on his shoulder. Ratchet wanted to growl with him. Neither of them had been in the know about it; from the look on Jazz's faceplates he hadn't known, either.

"A few days." Prowl replied simply, "Optimus and I saw no need to have everybody panic if it had been returned. We checked it and it is the same Allspark shard we originally had."

Ratchet narrowed his optics at this, "What's the 'but'?"

"It's weaker," Prowl said after a moment of hesitation, "Like some of the energy it contained has been used on something. We can't tell what."

"So ya saying that it's been taken, used, then returned? Ah think if it had been the Decepticons they woulda kept it." Jazz commented, faceplates carefully blank.

Barricade nodded, "I agree with Jazz. We never would have returned it if it was one of mine."

"So that means an Autobot took it," Will stated, slipping off of Ironhide's shoulder.

"At least we don't have to worry about tall, evil, and fugly then!" Epps added cheerfully.

They fell silent for awhile, some of them thinking about who could have taken it and why, and others just thankful that it didn't seem to have been used to revive Megatron. Barricade was lost in his own thoughts, so he didn't notice the first time an incoming call warning popped up on his HUD. By the time he did it was too late to answer, and he cursed out loud in Cybertronian, drawing the other's attention to him.

"Miles just called me and I missed it," Barricade ground out, glaring at all of them as if to dare them to say something.

He noticed that Ratchet seemed worried, but he was more surprised that the teen had actually called him. After the incident earlier that day he was sure that Miles wouldn't have bothered, or at least tried to hide away for a few days before showing his face again, because Barricade had been rightly angry. Miles called again, not even a full minute after his first attempt, and that told the 'con something was wrong. He routed the call through his speakers so that everyone and mech else in the room would be able to hear him and he them, picking up quickly..

"Barry?" They all heard, surprised by how panicked and breathless Miles sounded. "Thank God you picked up! I need help, they got Sam!"

Ratchet moved closer to Barricade quickly, "Miles, what's going on? Who's got Sam?"

"I don't kn-!" They heard Miles start to say, then freeze as something was knocked over in the background.

The teen stayed silent, so they all did, too, worried that anything they might say could only make whatever was happening worse. Barricade hacked into Miles' phone, using what little he knew from Frenzy to focus the coding on the sound programs so that they could hear better. With the sound quality increased they could hear Miles' deep breathing, along with the sound of something moving around near to him. They heard a loud bang as something else was knocked over, this time sounding much closer to where Miles was. Then Miles screamed.

"Miles?" Barricade called, "Miles, are you okay? Answer me!"

They could tell it was useless and that the 'con was going unheard. From what they could hear it sounded as if Miles was running, phone probably still in his hand, as something thundered after him. Whatever it was had to be big if it was making such a racket.

Bumblebee moved closer to Barricade and Ratchet, looking as panicked and as worried as a Cybertronian could get.

"They have Sam?" Bumblebee questioned, "I knew I shouldn't have let them go alone!"

"This is my fault, Bumblebee." Ratchet replied with a shake of his helm, "I asked them to go and wanted them to do so without any of us for a reason."

He didn't need to say that he had never dreamed it would be anything dangerous. The boys knew better at this point then to go near anything that looked like it might explode; what could have Wheeljack been doing in a place that would put them in danger?

"Shut up!" Barricade hissed at them.

They could all hear Miles come to a stop, the teen breathing harshly. They were relieved when Miles put the phone near his mouth again.

"I don't know what these things are! I think there's three, but..." Miles paused as he took another big gulp of breath, "What do I do? Oh God, I don't have any idea! The one's been chasing me for forever now, I was able to pull off some tricks but now all I can do is run as it breaks through things! And the other thing! It took Sam, just up and flew away with him!"

The teen fell silent and the room stayed silent as well, listening to Miles shuffle around in his panicked state. Prowl was trying to think of anything that could help the boy, they all were, but none had any idea what to say or what he was going up against. If it had been a Decepticon then the teen would have been able to tell them that, give them something to work with or allow them to barter with the potential enemy.

None of them tried to move from the room yet, knowing by the time they got there it would already be far too late. All they could do was wait, each individual trying to think of something to say to help.

"I think... yeah, if I can get up there then I could get through that window... maybe to the roof..." Miles mumbled.

It was obvious the teen was probably talking to himself, but none of them cared. They listened as he set the phone down, all of them noting several dragging sounds and then the teen grunting. He started muttering lowly almost as an afterthought, explaining to them that he was stacking a few boxes to try and aid him as he jumped into some of the low hanging rafters.

Ratchet thought this was a terrible idea, but he kept it to himself. They listened to Miles move things and mutter until he suddenly stopped.

"It's... Sam's alive! I can hear him yelling!" Miles sounded both happy and relieved for a split second. Then the teen seemed to realize just what that could mean and his tone changed completely, "Fuck, he's _yelling. _What am I supposed to do? If I could get out of this room I could try to find him, but one of them is out there. If I could break through the window I might be able to get there but I don't know how long that'll take! What if they're torturing him? I can't get to him yet!"

"Listen to me, Miles." Barricade commanded, putting on a tone that none in the room had heard yet. It was one that was obviously meant to calm and reassure the teen even as he cut off the organic's slightly hysterical rambling, "We'll be there as soon as we can. Ironhide is already half way there. Do anything you need to so that you can stay hidden but don't try to find Sam. If both of you are caught that would be even worse. Unless you can get out the window do not leave the room you are in."

No one called the Decepticon Neutral out on his lie, knowing it was meant to sooth the teen. Miles stayed silent for a moment, but they could hear a loud crash as something heavy rammed into something metal. By the way the teen gave an almost inaudible whimper it wasn't hard to tell that whatever had been chasing him was now trying to break into the room he was in.

"I have to try for the window," Miles said, voice unusually high as he set the phone back down.

There was another loud banging sound as they tried to figure out what the teen was doing. Within a minute the sound of boxes falling over came to them, followed by Miles grunting loudly.

"Okay," Miles' voice sounded far away from the phone at this point. "I got up to the rafters, I don't think it can get me from here."

Another loud bang echoed through the room he was in and they could hear the teen curse, although it was too low for them to tell what he said.

"Okay, this is just in case, got it?" The teen sounded like he was trying to reassure himself more than them, "Tell my parents I love them. Fuck, Sam's too. Give Epps all my money so he can fucking bet it away, I don't even care anymore. Oh, and, all things considered, if it's my last chance to say it... technically, Barry, you apologized first. Even if it didn't actually happen it counts!"

The teen rambled off a few more things, everyone and mech just listening to him silently. A final loud crash rang out, followed by what they could only assume was the door meeting a rough ending on the ground.

"Is that a fucking...?" Miles' voice rang out clearly, full of disbelief. Then it was full of terror. "Fuck, it's going for the pillar, it knows I'm up here! Don't you dare you assho-!"

They heard whatever it was ram into the pillar, Miles' sentence ending in a choked scream. There was a loud thump and groan, the sound of the teen hitting the floor and being winded. Miles screamed again as the creature gave a loud roar, then there was nothing as the line went dead.

Everyone was shocked into silence for a second, looking at each other as if they were unsure what the proper reaction was. Barricade gave a loud snarl, transforming down into his alt mode and racing out of the room. Bumblebee was quick to follow, everymech else giving chase. Only Will and Epps were left behind.

* * *

Barricade and Bumblebee were the first to arrive at the secluded, seemingly abandoned factory. Ratchet, Jazz, Prowl, and Ironhide were quick to follow, though. All of the Cybertronians changed into their bipedal modes as they moved in group towards the main building of the factory, where Miles' car was directly parked outside of.

Prowl was about to say something, going to suggest they devise a plan first, but Ratchet put up a servo to silence him. Barricade and Bumblebee walked right in, Bumblebee's plasma cannons charged up and Barricade looking murderous even just with his claws. The other four followed their lead, but they all stopped when something swooped down from the sky and landed in front of them. They all looked at the thing in slight shock as it spread it's wings at them in a threatening manner.

"Is that..." Ironhide sounded unusually thunderstruck, "Is that a slagging robotic _dinosaur_?"

"It doesn't matter!" Bumblebee decided with a growl, "This is the thing that took Sam!"

The Scout took aim and immediately fired a shot. The first one missed, but the creature obviously took it as the threat it was and immediately started to cower away from them, surprising them all. Bumblebee charged up his cannon for another shot, getting ready to aim once more when an angry voice stopped him.

"BUMBLEBEE!" Sam yelled, the teen sounding absolutely furious. They were all surprised when he appeared from around the side of the main building, the creature immediately turning tail and running behind him. They watched as it attempted to cower behind him ineffectively, being over half Sam's size.

"You put that cannon away right now," Sam ordered, putting his hands on his hips as he glared up at his Guardian.

Bumblebee listened immediately to his Charge, more than happy to just see him alive. They watched as Sam turned around and cooed at the thing, stroking one of it's wings and trying to get it to stop cowering.

"Aw, look what you did! You scared Swoop!" Sam exclaimed, continuing to try to comfort Swoop.

"Samuel," Prowl started carefully, "What exactly is Swoop?"

Ratchet decided he simply didn't care what Swoop was or why Swoop existed, reaching out a servo to pick Sam up and check him closely for any injuries. He could have easily scanned him, and in fact he did a minor one, but it was nice to feel his patient and make sure on a more personal level. He stopped when Swoop immediately stepped in front of Sam to guard him.

Sam laughed, "It's okay Swoop, they're friends. This is Swoop. Me 'n Miles have nicknamed him and his brothers the Dinobots. I'm pretty sure he's a Pteranodon."

"What the frag is going on around here?" Ironhide demanded, glaring at Swoop.

"I'll take you guys to Miles, Grimlock, and Snarl." Sam replied, patting one of Swoop's arms. The Pteranodon took this as a signal to pick the teen up, and Sam then patted his helm. "Come on, Swoop. Let's go see the others."

They followed Swoop as he led them inside the main building. The lights had been turned on, a few illuminating the place as they moved deeper into it. They entered a large room to see Miles sitting in front of a large robotic Tyrannosaurus Rex and a Triceratops. Swoop paused there, setting Sam down when the teen patted him on the arm again. They all looked closely at the Triceratops and the Tyrannosaurus Rex, noticing that they appeared to be trying to hold some type of playing cards. They kept falling out of their hands, and eventually the Tyrannosaurus Rex seemed to have enough of it, just tossing the rest of his cards down. Miles didn't even bat an eyelash.

"Me Grimlock HATE FISH GO!" The Tyrannosaurus Rex all but roared, causing Sam and Miles to wince at the level as Grimlock stood up, slamming his tail on the ground to show he was angry, if anyone had been stupid enough to miss it.

"Grimmy!" Miles admonished, "What did I tell you about using your inside voice? And it's Go Fish, not Fish Go."

Grimlock seemed to lose his anger quickly, sitting back down as he sulked. "Me Grimlock sorry."

"It's alright, Grimmy. Just try not to do it again." Miles soothed, patting Grimlock's side. He finally noticed Sam and Swoop with the others, grinning. "Hey guys! About time you showed up. We were running low on junk food to keep us awake."

Sam nodded, "No way are we going to bed before these oversized sparklings."

His tone was oddly affectionate as he moved closer, picking up the cards that Grimlock and Snarl had dropped. It was clear that the two teens were viewing the Dinobots, as they had been dubbed, almost as if they were children, and were treating them accordingly. Sam used the same exact tone when he talked to Annabelle.

"Ah don't think I get what's goin' down," Jazz spoke up, voicing the confusion for all of them. "Someone care to explain it to meh?"

"Well, as you know Ratchet asked us to sneak here to see what Wheeljack was up to," Sam said, switching places with Miles so his friend could stand and stretch while he sat down on Swoop's feet. "These guys are what he's been up to, apparently. I think we accidentally woke them up when I pulled out some plug, but this was the first time ever according to Grimmy, so they were all very frightened and curious. Swoop grabbed me, but we quickly managed to work it out. However, Miles was stuck with Grimmy and Snarl."

Miles picked up the conversation now, "These guys don't seem to be the smartest, or maybe it's because they're so young, but either way they gave chase because they see this as their territory since they woke up here. I heard Sam yelling because he and Swoop were trying to get their attention. Oh, and Grimlock stepped on my phone, think the government will reimburse me on that? Mom'll be pissed. That's the second phone this year."

The group of Cybertronians stared at the trio of Dinobots and the two teens. However scared they may have been initially, neither were showing any sort of fear now, having obviously become attached to the three that had frightened them so. Miles went about putting the cards and all the trash lying on the ground away.

"We do have one question ourselves, though." Sam said, looking at the 'bots expectantly.

Barricade and Ratchet exchanged weary glances, and Bumblebee looked confused. Ironhide was the one who asked what they wanted to ask, ignoring Prowl as he glared at him.

Sam and Miles looked at each other, then clasped their hands together in front of their chests in a begging manner, putting on their best puppy dog looks, pleading eyes and pout pushed up to the max. "Can we keep 'em? Please, please, pleaseeee?"

"Frag." Ironhide cussed, and his fellow Cybertronians couldn't help but agree.

* * *

An eventful hour later showed that it was Wheeljack who had taken the Allspark shard, using it to create the Dinobots for some reason. Prowl and Ratchet were both furious at the scientist and planned to grill him about it later when they returned to base and he woke up. Not even Ratchet would go against his own medical overrides, though, so they would have to wait until later the next day. Optimus had been called and informed of the situation, driving to the abandoned factory with his trailer so that they could pile the Dinobots into it and drive them back safely and secretly that way. later

Miles was sitting inside of Barricade, stretched out in the backseat comfortably and stroking some of what he could reach in a form of petting. The two sat in relative silence for awhile, the 'con keeping the teen updated on what was going on for most of the hour. The teen gave an occasional yawn, more than a bit tired, but he kept up his ministrations against the inside of Barricade's interior anyway.

"Are you okay?" Barricade finally asked, talking quietly through his radio.

"Yeah," Miles replied tiredly, sounding as exhausted as he felt. "I think so. I mean, excluding the fact I almost pissed myself when a Tyrannosaurus Rex broke into the room I was hiding in and _advanced._"

"You must have been frightened."

"I ran and nearly cried like a little kid for over an hour because of Grimmy and Snarl," Miles retorted with a snort. "I was a bit beyond frightened. And it's funny to me now, because I know them and they're nothing but over-sized children. I think they're just sparklings, really. They had to have been just afraid as I was. I've never been so terrified in my life, not even when I saw Soundwave or went against Ravage, and now I'm treating the things that were scaring me so badly like little siblings."

"I was... worried," Barricade admitted. "When you called like that, with the following conversation, I was not sure we would get here in time. I feared that you would be dead."

"Oh, I think I could have died happy. _You_ were going to apologize first," Miles teased.

Barricade stayed silent instead of bothering to growl, surprising the teen. He was surprised even more when he felt the backseat mold against him, providing better support and allowing his body to relax more.

"Yeah, okay." Miles sighed, "I thought I was gonna die too, Barry. And it's okay, I get you have this whole 'I don't feel anything like weak emotions, especially if they tie me to inferior beings' thing going on, the big bad 'con that you are. But you can't expect me to just stick around and take that! I was pissed and I had a right to be. That was me you and Bee were tearing apart and fighting over, you fucking asswipe."

"I did not think you would walk in on us," Barricade admitted quietly. "You had been gone most of the day and usually I get a text or-"

"It does not make me feel any better that you were only getting so pissy because I wasn't there to hear it," Miles cut in. "Because you were still saying those things."

"I..." Barricade vented sharply, "That is an understandable point. I have reservations about appearing too close to anyone and it appears organics even more so; Bumblebee saw this and picked at it. I overreacted."

It was as close to another apology that Miles was going to get, even though the first one had never been officially said. The teen sighed happily, accepting it for what it was, and stretched contentedly. He was about to drift off when he remembered something.

"Barry?" He asked softly, half asleep but fighting falling asleep the whole way.

He only got the radio turning on and playing soft music as a reply, Barricade trying to lull him to sleep. Miles knew Ratchet had recommended it, for both him and Sam, but the teen had fought it so far. He thought about teasing the 'con since he was doing Prowl's job, but decided against it so he could be even more honest for a bit.

"No matter what I'll never be sorry that you revealed yourself to me, so don't be stupid enough to blame yourself when something happens to me." Miles ordered, "It'll probably be my own stupid fault, anyway, so just promise that you'll try to help if it's really bad and we'll be golden. Oh, and I'd take you cutting back on being such a huge aft, but I know that's asking a lot."

He felt Barricade's frame shake with silent laughter, smiling widely because that told him that what he had said had been appreciated, and perhaps even agreed with. The teen decided that if it took thinking he was going to die to make him be more openly emotional with the 'con and for him to react likewise then they could just stay the way they were for all he cared.

* * *

Sam sat inside of Bumblebee, getting the Autobot to call Epps. After a few rings he could hear Epps' voice come through the radio. "Whassup Sammy, lil B?"

"Who won the bet this time?" Sam asked, grinning.

"Fucking _Optimus_," Epps grumbled. "He had 'Miles being put in danger somehow so Barricade apologizes or Miles freaks and apologizes because he doesn't want to die without doing so'. Prowl was close, but he said Barricade being put in danger. I can see why Optimus chose him as SIC, they think pretty similar. What do you think boss bot' is gonna do with the money, anyway?"

Before Sam could reply Bumblebee chose a song he thought appropriate, "__Vacation all I ever wanted! Vacation had to get away!__"

Sam and Epps laughed.


	16. Chapter 15

As it would turn out, the Dinobots would really only listen to Sam and Miles. Wheeljack had been horrified to see them up and running, stating that he had been no where near done outfitting their processors and bodies with the proper material and it was even a wonder the teens made it out of the factory alive, let alone that the Dinobots were somewhat well functioning. Then the scientist had been distracted by the ire of both Ratchet and Prowl, his creations long forgotten as the CMO and SIC tore into him.

Despite how hard and how often he tried, Wheeljack utterly failed to get his creations to even listen to him once. It had only taken Miles or Sam one word and they behaved, though. Ratchet thought this was probably because the Dinobots were associating them as their creators, the people there first when they onlined and who cared for them first, even if it was obvious by that point that Wheeljack was the real mech who had a hand in making them.

Being that they only listened to the two teens so far, one of them had to stay on base that Monday. Sam was chosen simply because Miles had missed a lot more school than he had. Miles had of course fought this valiantly, but when Prowl just picked him up and plopped him down in Bumblebee's servo that morning with strict orders to the Scout to make sure he actually went to school, there wasn't much he could do. Bumblebee had yet to return, but had informed them that he had personally watched Miles enter school after exiting 'Sasha'.

"Not that I'm not thrilled that you're here," Barricade drawled, "But _why_ are you here?"

The 'con glared down at the teenage making himself at home on his leg. Sam just grinned up at him.

"For a walking super computer you sure have bad memory files," Sam teased, "Optimus asked me to stay here to help with the Dinobots, and Bee followed Miles back to Tranquility to keep an eye on him. Make sure he didn't try to skip school to come back."

"Har. Har. Har." Barricade flicked Sam lightly, causing the teen to slide off his leg and fall on his back.

Sam chuckled, picking himself up off the ground. He decided that sitting on the tarmac then leaning against Barricade's leg was far safer then giving the Decepticon Neutral the chance to flick him off again. Barricade knew better than to seriously hurt him, but that didn't mean the teen wanted to give him the chance more than he had to.

The two of them were sitting in between the med-bay and the main hangar that held the meeting office, Prime's office, and other such important places. The Dinobots were currently running amuck inside of the med-bay, Ratchet trying to get them to stay still long enough to scan them properly. Sam had whispered to them to keep moving for as long as possible; now he was just waiting for the medic to get frustrated enough to call him in.

It seemed that without Bumblebee or Miles there, the two only had each other. After spending so long just simply being around each other because of being friends with the same teen, they had come to a sort of understanding and even friendship, though neither would ever actually call it that.

"It's not that I'm not happy you two are back together," Sam said, making himself comfortable again. "I mean, really, I'm thrilled. And I don't mean to make it sound the way I just did, but it's just that slagging Optimus won that bet!"

Barricade let out an amused sound. Like the soldiers, Sam and Miles had started picking up a small bit of Cybertronian. Well, the small bit that Ironhide and Ratchet were most likely to use when they wanted to cuss but wanted to continue to speak in something that the humans could actually understand. Sam even had a running list of different insults, prepared if he ever got in a fight with a 'bot. He'd offered them to Miles for when he and Barricade fought but his friend had turned them down.

"I still don't know how Miles doesn't know about the betting pool whenever we fight," Barricade replied, moving his leg enough that Sam lost his backrest and instead toppled backwards to the ground.

"Stop moving!" Sam growled, scooting himself back enough to get into the same position. "And I know. He's in over half of them by this point, he only knows so few, though. Think he's afraid to find out what major ones he's in. I, however, know all the ones I'm in."

"I know of two that the Insect has been keeping from you," Barricade said and Sam glanced up at him, hearing the smirk in his voice. "One is when you'll finally break up with the human femme, the other is when you and the Autodolt will jump each other and realize your sparkmates, or some similar nonsense."

"Both of them concern my love life, that's great!" Sam retorted sarcastically, only looking down when he felt his pocket vibrate, a sign his phone had gone off. "Ain't you Cybertronians ever heard of privacy?"

"No." The 'con stated simply, watching as Sam pulled his phone out of his pocket.

"It's from Miles," Sam told the 'con, thumbing through his phone to look at the message. "I should so tell Op... Oh, fuck. Trent has an Autobot!"

Barricade raised an optic ridge, "Trent DeMarco?"

"How do _you_ know Trent DeMarco?"

"He gave Miles a black eye. I was bored and got his truck towed and him in trouble." Barricade gave a shrug, "How does he have an Autobot?"

Sam shrugged, "Hell if I know, that's all that Miles said. 'Burger for brains has an Autobot.' Not how, but I bet Trent will be so pissed when he learns his truck got switched out for a living being!"

"And who would you like to tell of this development?"

Barricade still didn't have anymech's comm frequency, so the Decepticon Neutral was pretty much useless unless he could get up and go talk to somemech.

"Why tell?" Sam asked with a grin, "Want to see how Miles spins it?"

Barricade thought about that for a moment, "If he expects Trent to react the way he did then I think this will be very amusing to hear about later."

* * *

Miles felt that, from the start of the day, nothing he could have done would have made it go any better. Optimus talked a lot about freedom being the right of all beings, but apparently not when a being didn't want to go to school. And sure, he knew that the Prime was just trying to look out for him and that NEST could only pull so many strings before the school wanted to know more, but that didn't make him any happier about it.

To top it all off, his first class of the day had Trent DeMarco in it. He knew as long as he didn't do much and didn't bring up Sam or Mikaela, then he wasn't a threat, but that didn't make him like the other kid better. It was even worse because Trent's desk was directly in front of his own for that class and the jock was so much taller than him that it made it difficult to see the board and take the needed notes for that class.

Miles trudged into his first class and moved pass Trent's desk without making eye contact with the jock. He slid down into his desk and yawned, staring blankly ahead while everyone in the room waited for the teacher to get there. A stereo cassette player caught his eye, sitting just on the edge of Trent's desk, and Miles looked at it for a minute in amusement. It was outdated and just a bit too big; it seemed like the last thing the jock should have been interested in.

Something about it struck him as odd and it took him longer than he'd like to admit to realize why. Right in the middle of the stereo, beneath where a cassette could go in, was the Autobot insignia. Almost immediately he went to say something, barely catching himself and turning it into a cough instead, because what could he say? It was unlikely that whatever Autobot it may be had revealed themselves to Trent, after all. The Autobot might be trying to lay low after following Optimus' message to earth and not being able to find the others just yet.

He was distracted from the apparently sentient radio when the teacher walked in the room, quickly getting out a pencil and a piece notebook paper for the pop quiz that he was desperately unprepared for. Once he thoroughly failed that he got out his phone and fired off a quick text to Sam, using the jock's bulk to his advantage for once that year so he didn't get caught.

Miles thought carefully over what he should do, only paying enough attention to know that the teacher wasn't having them do much outside of notes the rest of class. It would probably be better if he could get the Autobot from Trent without the jock ever finding out about them. He could try to steal the stereo, but he doubted he could manage it and didn't want to see the consequences of if he was caught.

It wasn't until the end of class that Miles realized it may be impossible to get at the Autobot without getting at Trent, so he took out a piece of scratch paper and scribbled on it, folded it up, and flicked it up in the air just so it would land on Trent's desk. He watched as Trent unfolded it, read it, then turned around to sneer at Miles.

Mikaela may end up killing him for it, but he had told the jock that she had asked Miles to tell him something. He'd told Trent to meet him at the lake to talk about it during lunch, the seniors of the school allowed to go off campus for the small bit of time.

When lunch rolled around, Miles made his way out to his car. He glanced around the parking lot to check for Bumblebee, wondering if the Scout would really stay the whole day to make sure he stayed in school, but he figured by that point Sam had probably told him about Trent and the Autobot, so the Scout would let it slide.

He drove to the lake and parked just beside the tree where he had climbed up into it so long ago, back when Sam had first gotten Bumblebee and Trent and Mikaela were still dating. He was slightly surprised to see the jock already there, the disguised Autobot sitting on the hood of his truck as he played with the dials.

"Nice stereo," Miles said loudly enough to call attention to himself.

Trent sneered, barely glancing at Miles as he walked up to him. "It's a piece of shit, actually. Can't get it to fucking work right. Got it some old fucker's yard sale and shelled out more then this damn thing was worth."

"I could try to fix it for you," Miles offered. "Pretty good with old stuff like that."

"I think it's better off at the bottom of this lake," Trent said, walking down the embankment towards the lake with the stereo.

"No!" Miles cried, chasing after the jock and grabbing his arm to try to stop him. "You can't do that!"

"Oy, get off me, you freak!" Trent growled, using his free hand to shove Miles off of him and to the ground.

Miles wasn't able to scramble up fast enough to stop him anymore. The jock went to throw the stereo into the lake but it landed just short of it. Annoyed, Trent went to kick it in, but just before his foot could connect to it the Autobot transformed. The mech towered over Trent and the jock probably did the smartest thing he could at that point by just letting out a scream and stumbling backwards in shock.

He ran forward, placing himself squarely between Trent. The Autobot seemed to take this as a threat and activated his cannon, Miles quickly backing away just as Trent had, backing up into the jock.

"Whoa there!" Miles exclaimed, putting his hands up in a peaceful gesture. "I'm on your side, big fella!"

The Autobot didn't seem to believe him, but the cannon was powered down and lowered anyway. Miles let out a relieved sigh.

"I saw you watching me during the organic's learning period," The Autobot replied.

"That's because I recognized the Autobot symbol," Miles told the mech. "Trent doesn't know what an Autobot is, though, so that's why he was going to toss you in the lake. He didn't know you were alive. Either way, Optimus Prime has forbidden all of the Autobots from hurting the creatures of this planet unless it's absolutely necessary; turning Trent here into pink paste wouldn't be necessary."

Trent let out a small sound at that and the Autobot mech snorted, transforming his cannon back into a normal servo.

"You know Optimus Prime, then, organic?"

"I'm Miles Lancaster, the Charge of Second in Command Prowl, friend of the Autobots who originally came to Earth, Decepticon Neutral Barricade, and the Autobots who have arrived after the original five." Miles smirked.

"I am Communications Officer Blaster. I had been in a fight before arriving on Earth, and lost my ability to communicate with my fellow Autobots, or even give out a signal. I was able to learn English, but after that I lost connection with the satellites." Blaster informed, then looked at Trent. "He is your friend?"

Miles laughed, "Hardly. Trent DeMarco, now currently getting one of the bigger surprises of his life, probably."

"Are... are you crazy, Lancaster?!" Trent half yelled, seeming to come out of his shock when he head his name. "That giant fucking robot just tried to kill us! We have to call the cops, not make friends with it!"

"Oh, Trent." Miles sighed, taking a perverse sort of pleasure in how things were turning out for him. After so long of Sam being targeted by the jock it surely couldn't be too bad to torture him a little. "I don't think you're understanding the implications here. Blaster is a giant alien robot from outer space. With a weapon. Want to see how good his aim is?"

Trent shook his head.

"Didn't think so," Miles smiled. "Give me your phone."

Trent refused up until Blaster changed his arm back into the cannon, not even having to power it on before Trent had it out of his pocket and until Miles hand.

Miles grinned now, "Thank you. I'll be confiscating it until you have been informed of the situation more fully. Now, get in my car."

"Bu-" Trent tried to protest, but Miles gave him a forceful shove towards his car.

"Backseat, no buts." Miles ordered, marching the jock back up the small embankment and towards his care. "And if you act up any I have a set of hand cuffs in the glove box that I am not afraid to use!"

The teen left out that he didn't even have the key. He'd snatched them from the twins ages ago with a plan to use them on Sam at some point, but that was on a need to know basis and Trent just didn't need to know that. The jock hardly seemed to care, he just grunted something and climbed into the backseat. Blaster folded back down into what Miles was assuming was his alt mode, the teen watching in amazement the entire time. He had absolutely no idea how the mech could get himself to become something so small, but instead of asking he just picked the Autobot up and carefully placed him in the passenger seat. He climbed in the driver's seat and started his car up, buckling up immediately out of habit.

Miles drove them away from the lake. The teen knew the direction of the base after traveling to it so many times, but he wasn't completely sure of it's exact location. He figured if he got close enough he'd find it, or someone would come find him. He was a bit surprised by how quiet Trent was being and he glanced in the rear-view mirror, noticing how pale the jock looked and instantly feeling like a complete asshole.

"Oh, Fuck, Trent." Miles groaned, "Look, nothing's gonna happen to you, I swear. I was just jerking your chain a bit. Blaster felt threatened because you were attempting to hurt him and he reacted, but now he knows better and you know better, alright?"

"And just why should I believe that?" Trent asked, and Miles could practically feel the glare that the jock was giving him.

Miles sighed, "Look, I don't want you here as much as you don't want to be here, but we're both stuck now so I'll give you a quick run down. Remember everything on the news about Mission City? Complete cover up. It turns out that there's life out there on a planet a lot older than ours, called Cybertron. That's where Blaster is from, making him a Cybertronian. A war started up, I guess you could relate it to our civil war for how it tore Cybertron and all the Cybertronians apart. One side was the Autobots, like Blaster, and the other is the Decepticons. I won't go into the reasoning of what started the war because it's just a whole bunch of shit and I think Optimus gets off on it, but just know that most Decepticons, who have red eyes, aren't that friendly to organics. The Autobots, which Blaster here is apart of, and I am too, technically, wanted to stop the Decepticons. They sent the Allspark cube off into space as a last ditch effort, and lo and behold it landed on Earth." He paused, waiting for Trent to say something.

"So they… came here?" Trent asked cautiously, knowing that Miles was waiting for him to say something.

"Got it in one!" Miles said cheerfully. "The Decepticon leader, Megatron, followed the cube all the way here and ended up frozen in the arctic. Sam's grandfather, Archibald Witwicky, ended up finding Megatron, and one thing led to another and somehow he got the coordinates of the cube's location imprinted on the glasses. Hoover Dam? It held the cube and Megatron's body. Everyone thought Megatron was dead, but nope. That's where most of our technology comes from, reverse engineered from Megsy or some stupid bullshit like that, so these fuckers can hack into it and ruin everything like nothing. Anyway, when the other Decepticons got here in search of both Megatron and the cube, they found Sam's eBay page, and tracked him through that. Luckily, Sam had just bought that camaro, which turned out to be the Autobot Bumblebee."

Trent snorted, "You mean that piece of shit came from outer space?"

Miles considered telling the jock off for that, but he knew as well as the Scout himself did that he had appeared to be nothing more than a barely running car. He continued the explanation, mentioning Sector Seven and what really happened in Mission City, including how Sam had been the one to kill Megatron, destroy the cube, and save their planet in one fell swoop.

"Wait, is that why you and Witwacky weren't so buddy buddy early this year?" Trent demanded once Miles had finished.

"You could say that." Miles answered in surprise, not realizing the jock payed enough attention to notice something like that. Half of his other friends hadn't even noticed. "It was confidential information and he was afraid he might put me in danger if I knew. But I ended up finding a damaged Decepticon without knowing it, and started to fix it up, planning to sell it so I could get my own car. You remember how your truck got towed? That was Barricade, the 'con I made friends with."

"Why would he target me?" Trent asked.

"He didn't like that you gave me a black eye," Miles grinned into the rear-view mirror. "If it makes you feel any better, I think he was just really bored more than him being ridiculously overprotective or some nonsense. Wanted to see if he could do it. If I remember right he became a lot more active on police scanners after that, so..."

"He is with the Autobots now?" Blaster asked, surprising both Trent and Miles by speaking up in the first place.

"Yeah," Miles shrugged a bit, making a sharp turn off road and into the desert. "Like I said, I found him and started fixing him up for reasons of my own. He revealed himself and I stuck with 'im, he was gonna lay low for a while but I accidentally ruined that. Long story short? You 'bots tracked him down and I made sure he didn't get killed, so, uh, if you hear anything about me taking Hide down with a bouquet of roses, could you not laugh? Sunstreaker and Sideswipe only just stopped tormenting him with flower themed pranks because of Halloween and I don't want to die."

Trent actually laughed at that, but Blaster just made a confused sound. Miles sighed, realizing the mech didn't know much about Earth outside of how to speak English, and explained what roses were. He explained what he could to both of them, making use of how long it took to get to the base. He could only push his car so far over the speed limit, after all, and he hardly wanted them to break down half way there. They were nearly there when Miles remembered that he hadn't said anything about the Dinobots.

"Not all of the 'bots are Cybertronians, by the way." Miles mentioned, saying it to Blaster more than to Trent.

"What do you mean?" Blaster asked, sounding confused.

Miles was about to reply until he glanced at Trent in the rear-view mirror again. He grinned, "You'll see."

The jock caught the look and scowled back at him, but said nothing. Miles just kept his grin and pulled onto the secret road that would take him straight to the base. It was another five minutes but it was the only way that would place him close to the med-bay, where he was sure Ratchet would want Blaster to be. He parked just outside of it, letting Trent get out before he went around and picked Blaster up.

Miles barely had time to place the mech down on the ground so he could transform before he could hear something thundering towards them, followed by a loud yell.

"ME GRIMLOCK MISS MILES!" Grimlock yelled as he came racing towards them.

Grimlock was soaking wet, water dripping off his metal hide and pink bubbles on his tail. Sam had probably tried to and failed to bathe the Dinobot. The teen would have taken some enjoyment in Trent's terrified gasp if he hadn't been nearly mowed over by the excited Dinobot, just to then be picked up and squeezed in as good of a hug as he could give.

"Hey Grimmy, I missed you too!" Miles said affectionately, hugging Grimlock's face. "Did you behave for Sam?"

"Me Grimlock no like bath!" Grimlock growled, defending himself before Miles even knew he was in trouble. Miles grinned, and Grimlock looked as pouty as a Tyrannosaurus Rex robot could. "Who they?"

"That's Blaster, another Autobot." Miles squirmed out of the Dinobot's grasp, half turning to grin at Trent. "This is Trent DeMarco. Trent, say hi to Grimmy before you hurt his feelings."

"H-hi!" The jock sputtered, backing away slightly when Grimlock peered down at him.

"GRIMLOCK!" They heard Sam yell, looking as the teen came running towards them. He was soaking wet, and as he came to a stop he scowled up at the Dinobot before noticing Trent and Blaster. "Oh, you must be the new comer! I'm Sam Witwicky."

"Hello Sam Witwicky, I am Bla-"

He was interrupted by Barricade and Bumblebee running up in their bipedal forms. They ignored Trent as he gawked up at them, and Miles looked at the two once before laughing. Several areas on the two were covered with pink bubbles. It was mostly their servos and peds that were affected, but it still made for an amusing sight.

"Wow Barry, those are some nice bubbles. Really suit you." Miles said in between laughs.

"Oh look, here's a conveniently placed rag for me to use to wipe these pesky bubbles off." Barricade retorted, reaching out and picking Miles up. He then used him to do just that, holding the teen in place as he wiped his servos against him, though it became quickly ineffective as the teen's clothes weren't made to soak up bubbles. Miles protested loudly, squirming in his grasp and trying to find a wire to tug to annoy him while Sam and Bumblebee just enjoyed the moment. Once he was satisfied he set Miles down, glaring down at Trent. "I know you. You're that stupid brat who gave Miles a black eye."

Trent gulped, "And I'm really, really, sorry about that!"

"Oh, calm down. He glowers threateningly at everyone." Miles smirked when Barricade's glare turned towards him, "Everyone, this is Blaster. Blast you probably know Bee and Barry at least a little bit. Sam just introduced himself and the big lovable puppy here is Grimlock."

Bumblebee immediately took over then, moving Blaster to the side and talking to him. The Scout didn't take over very often, but when he did it was rare for anyone to step in his way. He was an effortless leader, and even Jazz had no problem deferring to him if Bumblebee was actually stepping up to say something. It wasn't long before the two walked off, the Scout leaving pink bubbles in his wake.

"I love how even after Optimus has Bee cart you off to school you manage to get out of it somehow." Sam said accusingly, grinning.

Miles huffed, "It was for a good cause! I practically saved Trent's life. The idiot was about to kick Blaster, after trying to toss him in a lake, and it's not like Blaster would have known any better."

"Oy, I would watch what you call me," Trent snapped in annoyance, but as soon as he actually took a step towards Miles he was pinned in place by red optics and a teeth baring T-Rex. "Fine, call me what you want."

"Kind of wish you would have brought Mikaela," Sam commented, looking at the jock with mild amusement for once. He made sure to move over to Grimlock and give the Dinobot a pat to make him behave. "It's not like we get on."

"Bit too late now," Miles replied, "And he needs to see a soldier about being briefed and officially filed away, anyway. Who should we take him to?"

"Epps," Barricade suggested.

Knowing him as well as he did, Miles could pick up the slightly mischievous tone and couldn't help grinning himself. Epps would have a field day with the jock.

* * *

After taking Trent to Epps and explaining the situation, they didn't see or hear anything from them for the next five hours. Barricade had correctly assumed that the Sergeant would be the best to introduce the jock to first, given his previous treatment of Sam and Miles, how he openly acted, and how they reported he usually behaved. There was something to be said about a man who can talk in such a way that even Annabelle Lennox would seem frightening.

The trio then joined up with Bumblebee and Blaster. The Scout had taken Blaster to see Optimus first, defending himself by saying that the mech had demanded to see the Prime and that he also happened to not have any personal experience with Ratchet. After the initial introduction and a lot of talk that Miles and Sam couldn't understand, Optimus rushed Blaster out of his office and sacrificed him to the medic's clutches.

"So, what exactly were you guys hoping to achieve? The dinosaur version of a car wash?" Miles asked as they neared the wash rack, seeing more bubbles then he ever thought possible.

Sam huffed, "The twins messed with the stuff I was going to use. By the time I noticed I was practically in a sea of bubbles and had to call for 'Cade and Bee to come get me out and Grimmy had already escaped."

"It was rather amusing hearing Sam's voice underneath a sea of bubbles," Bumblebee commented with a laugh. "But I almost think that 'Cade here loved them even more."

This, of course, set Barricade off, the 'con stating just what he'd love to do if he had a weapon and Bumblebee responding in like. The two bantered back and forth effortlessly at this point, though both made sure to keep it light to avoid any actual fights happening again. As they bantered back and forth playfully, Sam and Miles did several games of rock, paper, scissors. Bumblebee noticed first, his attention drawn immediately when Sam let out a cuss. The Scout asked why they were doing it.

"To decide who has to tell Miks about Trent," Sam replied just as he beat Miles.

"God fucking damn it!" Miles cursed, "She's _your_ girlfriend, you aft!"


	17. Chapter 16

By the time Mikaela got there with Bumblebee driving her, it was already almost dinner and most of them had retired to the rec-room. The girl was coming with her own agenda, but she had heard that there was a new Autobot on base that she planned to meet after she did what she needed to do.

It had been a few months since Mission City and her relationship with one Samuel James Witwicky had fizzled out. She wasn't interested in him as that type of boyfriend anymore, feeling like they were more close friends by that point than anything else. Maybe it would have gone differently if Bumblebee hadn't been a constant presence with them, but there was just no telling the Scout that he couldn't tag along with them. Any actual romance, let alone sex, had suffered because of that, leading Mikaela to view Sam in a more platonic way.

The teen was almost completely sure that Sam felt the same way. They had been texting less and less, his surprise presents had all stopped, there was no more immediate hugging and kissing when they saw each other, and things had just changed. Now it was too awkward to act like an actual couple, although she'd be damned if she was going to stop bossing him around or cuddling with him.

Mikaela took a deep breath and steeled herself as she walked into the rec-room, Bumblebee following immediately behind her. If she had read Sam wrong entirely and did end up breaking his hurt then it comforted her some to know the Scout was there to help hold him together.

"Sam, I'm breaking up with you." Mikaela blurted out as soon as she saw him, cursing herself mentally as that completely ruined all the ideas about asking him out of the room to keep it somewhat private.

All conversation ceased and eyes turned to her in shock. Jazz, Miles, Barricade, Epps, Will, and Fig were the most obvious about it. And Sam stared at her with wide eyes, looking like he was still comprehending just what had been said, so she averted her own. In doing so she noticed someone that she was sure should not have been on a NEST base. Trent stared back at her, looking aggravatingly hot with his amused half smirk that.

Trent turned to look at Miles smugly, who was sitting next to him and didn't seem to be that happy about it. "Is this what you wanted to tell me?"

"Excuse me?" Mikaela asked, glaring at Miles.

"What?" Miles asked, seeming shocked before he caught on. "No, no, of course not! I told Trent that you wanted me to tell him something, but that was a lie to get closer to Blaster! How was I supposed to know that you'd break up with Sam today? That's not my fault!"

Sam snickered, "Timing."

Mikaela glanced over at him, any anger she had felt disappearing to be replaced by relief. She might not have loved Sam in that way anymore, but she still loved him and never wanted to see him hurt, let alone be the reason he was. Saving the world with giant alien robots could do a lot to change a person, but it could also do a lot to bring two people together. It was hard not to forge a bond in the face of something like that. Being together had seemed the best option then, but now she could see that they could still be close even if they weren't 'sparkmates'. They were alike in some ways, different in others and they did compliment each other, but no more than friends would. It ended up becoming just what Miles had always said it would be, nothing more than a high school romance. A lot of people had seen it coming and she knew that there was a betting pool on who would break up with who first, a second one added on to the version where she did that guessed at Sam's reaction.

"Blaster?" She asked, turning back to Miles.

"Another Autobot, the Communications officer, or something," Miles shrugged, "His alt form is a big stereo thing, for whatever reason."

"When do I get to meet him?" she asked, tilting her head to the side thoughtfully as she remembered who else she hadn't had the pleasure of being introduced to yet. "And the Dinobots?"

"Blaster will be there during dinner to be introduced to you and some of the soldiers," Bumblebee replied. "Grimlock, Swoop, and Snarl are currently at Wheeljack's lab, driving him insane."

"Okay." Mikaela then turned to Epps, "Who won?"

Epps grinned, "Bumblebee. Mech bet that you'd be the one to break up with Sam, even specified that Sam wouldn't really care."

"Bumblebee!" Sam groaned, "Not you too! You Cybertronians and crazy NEST members are impossible!"

"Ya love us, and ya know it!" Jazz said cheerfully, laughing when Sam just grumbled to himself.

"Well, look at it this way. I'm not holding you back anymore," Mikaela smirked. "You and Miles can take your bromance to the next level."

"Yes!" Miles grinned. "We should totally sing Guy Love in front of everybody, Sam."

Sam made a face, laughing. "No way."

"Don't worry,Miles. I'm more than willing to sing Guy Love with you in front of everyone." Bumblebee laughed.

"What? No way! My best human friend is not cheating on me with my best alien friend, and vice versa!" Sam exclaimed, causing everyone to laugh as he grinned.

"I'm sorry, Sam, we just can't hide it anymore!" Adding a more dramatic flare to his voice, he grabbed Miles' hand, yanking the teen into his lap and hug. Miles was laughing too hard to protest.

"Well fine, I'll take Barricade then!" Sam mocked huff.

Barricade snorted, "I don't want anything that the Insect has infected, thank you very much."

"I'm flattered, I am, but..." Miles had to stop talking as he struggled out of Bumblebee's grip, still laughing. "You can keep Sam, I've got Sasha."

"Sasha?" Trent asked, speaking up and surprising some of them. The teens, mostly, had forgotten he was there.

"Oh, uh..." Miles turned to look at the jock, "That's my non-Cybertronian car. I thought it'd be good for a laugh to give her a name and a gender."

"Ohh, speaking of non-sentient cars, do you think Sasha could replace Bee soon?" Sam asked, Bumblebee making a slightly offended noise. Whether it was playful or he meant it Sam couldn't tell, so he patted the Scout's leg in a comforting manner. "My cousin is going to be having her bacherlorette party at my house. Believe me, you won't want to be there."

"As long as no one does inappropriate things inside of Sasha and I'm invited, okay."

"Course you're invited, bro. Eric's going to be trusting you to make sure his future wife doesn't do anything stupid!" Sam replied with a grin, "Happening next week. We get Friday off to help get ready and then it starts, then Saturday is the wedding."

"A party? That sounds like fun. Am I invited?" Epps asked playfully.

Sam laughed, "Sorry, Epps. I think it would be hard to explain you being there."

"Could just say I'm your boyfriend." Epps mock pouted, causing everyone to laugh.

"Cradle robber!" Miles snickered. "Hey mom, dad, I want you to meet my boyfriend. He's about a twenty years older than me, and involved with those alien robots, so he's as crazy as I am!"

"I think it would go over perfectly." Mikaela smirked, "As long as 'Sam's happy time' isn't brought up again."

"Dear Primus, all of you, excluding Miles, are never coming near my house ever again!" Sam groaned.

"And me." Bumblebee added, grinning.

"Sorry, Bee, I get bro-dibs. You come after me!" Miles said, laughing.

Barricade cut Bumblebee off before he could protest. "I wouldn't. Unless you want to be there and have your back seat defiled."

"True, true." Bumblebee replied thoughtfully, "I think I'll come visit the base for the weekend then."

"We do expect to get calls from you two. We need to know if you're going to be doing anything inappropriate so we can ask for pictures and laugh!" Epps grinned.

Miles laughed, "Knowing Sam's family they'll try to get him drunk."

* * *

"So you told one of them to call us if the other gets drunk?" Will asked, an eyebrow raised.

"Yup!" Epps said cheerfully.

The days had passed quickly and it was already the Friday of the bacherolette party. The plans had been changed slightly, Sam and Miles having been asked to return to base Saturday instead of go to the wedding because a new Cybertronian was arriving near Tranquility and they had yet to tell if it was Autobot or Decepticon. Bumblebee had been even more reluctant to leave because of that, but Sam eventually managed to shoo the protective guardian away.

They were in the rec-room again. Bumblebee, Barricade, Jazz, Mikaela, Will, Blaster, Epps, Maggie, and Prowl, that is. The humans sat on one couch while the holoforms sat on the other.

Barricade snorted, "You really think they'll listen?"

"No." Epps grinned. "Which is why I have my laptop. If one of them calls someone with their phone, I'll know it, and I'll be able to get into the conversation."

"That's invading their privacy, Robert." Bumblebee said, frowning.

"I'm just keeping an eye out for them," Epps replied with his best innocent tone, knowing he could at least win Bumblebee over if he said things the right way. "You know how many things could happen that they wouldn't call us over? A house fire, trip to the hospital, robbers."

"I doubt they'll really care, anyway." Mikaela laughed, "Don't think they'll be making any personal phone calls tonight. Besides, there's nothing else to do. The twins aren't even leaving their room!"

"What's with them lately, anyway?" Maggie asked, "I think they've been getting jumpier."

Jazz shrugged, "Who knows?"

They waited a few hours, different people checking Epps' laptop every now and then. Maggie and Prowl started to play chest, Bumblebee and Jazz were playing video games, Epps was playing the winner of said video games, Mikaela was discussing music she liked with Blaster, and Barricade was talking with Will about strategic war moves. It was about 12:30 when they noticed Miles calling someone, Epps quickly hacking into the call with a grin. They had no idea who was being called, but they figured they'd find out.

"_Miles? What's up?_"  
"_Eric, I'm sorry, but I can't watch over your wife anymore._"  
_"What's going on?_"  
There was a lengthy pause on Miles' end. "_A lot. I'm going to go up and hide in Sam's room because there is just way too much going on._"  
"_Damn, sounds pretty bad. Sorry for them traumatizing you, lil bud. You at least get pictures to embarrass them with later?_"  
"_Oh hell yeah._"  
"_Good boy. You can keep my camera until after we get back from the honey moon. That should be enough time to upload the film._"  
"_Should be. Wait a sec- JUDY DON'T TOUCH THAT!_"  
"_Oh jeez, Judy? How's Sam holding up?_"  
"_Actually, Sam's the main reason I'm going to go up and hide in his room. Well, Sam, Judy, Bunny, and everyone else, basically._"  
"_Who's Bunny?_"  
"_A very friendly male stripper. He's apparently bisexual, and has a thing for younger males. On the other hand he has a thing for older women. I'd say it's a good thing Sam's single now but then again I don't think he'll be able to function in the morning, let alone remember any of it, so..._"  
A pause as they could hear nothing but Eric laughing. "_Oh Jesus, I'm sorry, bud._"  
"_Be sorry for Sam, he's going to have one hell of a hangover. And the pictures I have are too good not to use on him._"  
"_Do I get to know what they are?_"  
"_You'll see soon enough."  
"And how has Bunny been treating you?"  
"We're not talking about Bunny anymore. I have to go, Sam's being cornered by your soon to be wife to see if vacuum cleaners really can give someone a hickey._"

And then there was nothing as the line went dead, Miles not even leaving time for a proper goodbye as he apparently went to save Sam from a vacuum cleaner. Epps looked around at the others in the rec-room with him.

"They better bring that fucking camera with them." Epps said, grinning.

Maggie rolled her eyes, "Sam is obviously plastered and you're worried about some photos?"

"Too late to stop him now _and_ it's around family. Family is providing the alcohol." Will replied for Epps, shrugging. "Can't do much against that."

Mikaela laughed, "Not like you guys didn't let us at alcohol during the Halloween party."

"The thinking behind that is you were around responsible people, nothing bad ended up happening after all, and it'll kill the curiosity." Epps huffed.

* * *

Mikaela, Bumblebee, Barricade, Jazz, and Epps were waiting for Sam and Miles to arrive in 'Sasha'. They had already gotten a call earlier from a strained sounding Miles as he tried to wake Sam up, saying that they'd be there by noon. When they watched Miles pull past the gate and drive towards them, Bumblebee was happy he decided to listen to Sam. Miles' car had a few more dents than it had before the party and it looked like it had been drawn on. They watched as Miles drove closer and closer, only to swerve suddenly. Barricade was about to see what was wrong, but they all heard a loud "DAMMIT SAM!". Miles quickly braked and turned Sasha off, then scrambled out of the car. Sam came out after him, laughing hard. The five stared in shock at the two.

"What the frag is your problem?" Miles hissed, either not realizing they had an audience, or just not caring. Probably he didn't care, as Bumblebee, Barricade, and Jazz were in there bipedal modes.

"Hahaha! I figured out what those stains were!" Sam held up a camera to Miles, seeming quite content to just sit on the tarmac.

Miles took it and looked at what had Sam laughing so hard. "Primus damn it, they defiled Sasha's back seat!"

"Miles?" Sam asked, trying not to laugh.

"What?" Miles snapped.

"You realize that's my parents, right?" Sam grinned, Miles quiet for a moment as he let the information sink in.

Miles slowly turned around to face the others, voice strained as he looked mildly horrified and disgusted. "I changed my mind. I want a Cybertronian as my mode of transportation. That'd never happen in one of you because you wouldn't let it!"

"You two realize that you're _covered_in glitter, right?" Mikaela asked.

"Yeah!" Sam replied cheerfully, getting up off the ground. He then proceeded to gesture them closer, and opened Sasha's doors. Barricade, Bumblebee, and Jazz activated their holoforms. The floor was covered in glitter, as deep as it could get. Glitter was on the seats, around the mirrors, on the ceiling of the car. They watched as Sam opened the glove box and glitter poured out.

Miles groaned, leaning against Barricade's holoform for support. "We don't know where the glitter came from. The only picture we have of stuff being done to Sasha, besides her being defiled, is of some clown painting on her."

"From the way that phone call sounded las' nigh' Ah'm surprised Sam's so chipper." Jazz said, effectively informing the two that they had been snooped on. He ignored Epps' glare.

"I don't remember most of it, actually." Sam laughed, "And why I'm only looking at the very last few pictures."

"Sam learned how to lap dance!" Miles said gleefully, watching as Sam froze up and made a small strangled kind of sound. He really hoped the memories were coming back.

Bumblebee and Jazz looked slightly shocked, Barricade looked bored, and Epps and Mikaela started to laugh. Miles pulled up the pictures on the camera, showing he wasn't lying.

"Not gonna lie, I did too." Miles admitted, saving Sam some embarrassment, although he was already beet red. "It's really no fun being sober unless you join in on the stupidity. Bunny certainly liked Sam more, though. In fact, Sam, check your back pocket."

Sam did so without thinking, pulling out a folded up piece of paper. He unfolded it, read it, and if possible managed to turn even more red.

"That is Bunny's phone number." Miles explained, smirking. "Now if you excuse me, I'm going to go find Grimlock and ask him to _accidentally _step on Sasha, that way the government has to buy me a new car."

Epps stopped him to grab the camera, then let him leave. Triumphant, he turned towards the others, starting to look through the pictures. Sam eventually had to leave before even getting through the first ten, thoroughly embarrassed and suddenly feeling like he should get cleaned up.

* * *

Will had decided to take Trent DeMarco on as a sort of personal project. The Captain was determined to see if he could get the jock to shape up or if he was just a lost cause; between what Mikaela said about him and Miles and Sam said about him some aspects of the teen's personality weren't matching up. Mikaela had admitted that he could be a dumb jerk, but that was just the jock he was, and that he had been nothing but sweet to her most of the time. That was obvious, too, in that they were getting along just fine any time they were around each other. The Captain knew Sam and Miles were a bit uncomfortable around the jock, but he had been trying to get them to spend more time together and to talk more, even if Sam and Miles tended to try to avoid all of Will's efforts.

Due to this, Will decided that an impromptu day out between the four teenagers would be a great bonding experience. That meant he had to make sure Miles didn't actually get Grimlock to destroy his car, needing something non-sentient and knowing he couldn't use a military vehicle for his plan. It also meant that he had to sneak them out before the Autobot the others were waiting on landed, making sure they were long gone before anyone noticed.

He shouldn't have been too surprised when his plan failed, but he had held some hope it wouldn't have ended quite as it did. Of course, when Optimus had said the newest Autobot would be landing near Tranquility, none of them had thought it would be that near to the city, nor as soon as the Autobot did.

He'd decided to take the four teenagers to the skate park because he remembered that long ago Miles had said something about skate boarding, Mikaela had mentioned roller-blading, and Trent himself had mentioned wanting to try something or other at the skate park. He'd brought Sam along because he'd needed to come, but it didn't look like the four would be getting to do anything that day. They'd barely gotten to the skate park when Will had heard a weird sound and looked up, noticing something large falling from the sky. He'd had enough time to back them up so that they weren't anywhere near the blast radius, although Miles' car still shook when the blast of pressure hit them.

Miles whistled, "Is it gonna be the military or the Government that reimburses the city on the skate park?"

Will shot the teen a glare to get him to shut up, before looking back out the windshield of Miles' car. He thought on what to do for a moment, pulling out his phone and calling Ratchet to explain what was going on. Then he quickly got out of the car at the medic's request, jogging ahead to see if the Cybertronian needed any help.

This left the four teenagers alone in the car together, all unsure what to say.

"Do you think whoever it is is okay?" Mikaela asked after a moment, half out of the car and listening for the Captain.

"I think we should go check ourselves," Miles said, unbuckling and getting out of the car. "You know some stuff, don't you? Barry taught me a few things and I watched him do some self-repairs. We have to see if we can help, there's no way that the 'bot isn't wounded after a fall like that."

"Got a tool chest?"

"In the trunk."

And just like that Mikaela and Miles were gone, both running ahead to find the Captain and the fallen Autobot. Sam watched them go in mild shock, not sure how to respond to the current situation. He knew absolutely nothing about Cybertronian anatomy and knew he could just be a distraction or a hindrance if he went after them.

But that left him alone with Trent. He glanced in the rear-view mirror to see what the jock was thinking and nearly had a heart attack to see Trent looking back, the both of them averting their eyes instantly.

"Look, I'm sorry." Trent said after about a full minute of awkward silence. Sam glanced back in the rear-view mirror in his shock, staring at him as if he had grown a second head—which he may as well have if he was apologizing.

"Uh… If I ask for what you're not going to beat me up, are you?" Sam asked tentatively.

"I don't actually hate you," Trent replied. "It was just the thing to do. Like you hating me."

Sam went to defend himself, to say that he only ever hated the jock because Trent started to be mean to him, but he realized that wasn't exactly true. They had been in the same school for forever; in middle school they had been more than capable of holding a decent conversation, even if they had never been friends. But it had just seemed to be the thing to do, Trent joining the football team and Sam walking with the lower masses of the high school. They were basically forced into hating each other, Sam getting Mikaela right after she'd broken up with Trent not helping one bit.

"I don't think we know enough about each other to actually say we hate each other," Trent said after another moment. "I mean, Mikky likes you, and it's hard not to believe someone's okay when the human equivalent of a Goddess, who's even good with cars, notices them."

"I thought you didn't like a girl good with cars?" Sam asked, "Isn't that why you two broke up?"

"We broke up because we weren't together to be together," Trent told him. "Mikky was in it because we were both popular and it was what everyone expected. I had been looking for a way to piss her off enough for her to dump me and that was it."

Sam turned in his seat to stare at the jock in open shock, "You... you wanted her to break up with you?"

"I wasn't doing anything good for her," Trent shrugged, "Don't get me wrong, I did think she was really hot, but there's more to a girl than looks even for a guy like me. She didn't love me, I don't think she even really loved herself back then. You guys, all this alien robot nonsense and you being friends with her, its like she found herself. I'm happy for her."

"I... but..."

"You can't tell her, got that?" Trent glared at him, "I watch over all my ladies, but sometimes it helps if they don't know they're being watched over. Mikaela's strong and prides herself on being independent. If she knew I was trying to give her a push in the direction she needed to go to become something besides a typical high school cheerleader than she'd have my balls on a plate."

"I..." Sam just shook his head, "I think we're going to get on a lot better than I thought if what you're saying is true. I never dreamed you were this smart."

"I can still kick your ass," Trent threatened.

"Not when I can have someone step on yours."

"You fucking little..."


	18. Chapter 17

Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots, walked in to the meeting room and had to fight the urge to walk right back out. He knew it would be loud, since he could hear them all the way down the hall, but on his list of things he wanted to do today having this meeting wasn't one of them.

One of his Autobots, a mech designated Huffer, had just landed. Huffer had obviously gotten the message he'd sent up into space, but when he had landed he had been much too damaged and was leaking out energon too fast for Ratchet to reach him. In an odd twist of events Will had been there, apparently having decided that taking the base's four civilian teenagers out to try to get them to bond was a smart idea. The Captain was able to provide the mech some company and comfort; with Mikaela and Miles there they been able to do what little they knew how to help try to prolong the mech's life.

As it would turn out, Miles knew just enough to take away some of the mech's pain, too. Ratchet, of course, had needed to have a long talk with both Barricade and Miles after he'd found out that the teen had known how to force his way to some access ports and turn off pain receptors, but it had been useful at the time. Optimus had been there for the talk. Barricade had been unapologetic and the teen had just looked between all of them before shrugging and walking out.

Perhaps it was that loss that had spurred him into calling the impromptu meeting. The death had already been discussed at large, Prowl and he coming to an agreement that what energy was left in the Allspark shard would not be used to resurrect the mech, and a memorial service was already planned to honor him. As much as the Prime had liked Huffer on a personal level the mech wasn't that important to the Autobot cause in the long run; they had to reserve what energy they had because they had no idea what the future held.

The Prime took his seat at the head of a large, Cybertronian sized, table. To his left was Barricade, who appeared to be arguing with Miles. After listening in for a moment he put his face mask down to hide his smile. Miles was attempting to get Barricade to take him to something called a concert, the 'con refusing. To his right was Ratchet, the medic was talking to Prowl and berating him for not getting enough recharge. Prowl had Maggie and both were steadily ignoring Ratchet. Bumblebee was sitting next to Barricade. He had Sam with him and the poor boy still look embarrassed. Just earlier that morning Miles had sent everyone a video of his friend lap dancing, saying that the base needed a good laugh after Huffer's loss. Blaster, who had Glen, was sitting next to Jazz, who had Epps. The four appeared to be in a heated debate about music. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe were sitting side by side, Sunstreaker talking to Fig in Spanish. Besides that there was also Trailbreaker, Wheeljack, Blurr, First Aid, Ironhide, and Inferno. Will, of course, was with Ironhide, discussing which weapon would be better in what situation. They also had Trent and Mikaela with them.

He made a sound akin to a human cough, using it to get everyone's attention. Once all eyes and optics were turned towards him he felt it safe to begin.

"I have called everyone to this meeting because it has been brought to my attention that we may still not have a complete understanding of each other," The Prime stated. "In light of Huffer's death, I thought it best that we try to connect more to reunify after a hard loss. Ratchet, if you would."

"This is only the first meeting in a series of meetings. Today we will be discussing family and death. Prowl, you can go." Ratchet nodded in Prowl's direction.

"Yes, well, as most of you know the Allspark was the source of where our sparks came from. The creators, your parents, would personally make their sparkling's body themselves before receiving the spark. Now, there are cases of some of our kind being blessed enough to be able to create sparks without the aid of the Allspark, and they shall be referred to as femmes. These Cybertronians are generally of a smaller frame type and do not live as long as the rest of us do, the strain of holding so much energy becoming too much after a few vorns. A spark made by a femme, be it with another femme or a mech, will not be able to make another spark, so therefore will always be a mech. There is a huge difference in the femme to mech ratio, which is why our concepts of gender, and gender based relationships, are different. It is more normal for a mech to be with another mech than a mech to be with a femme on Cybertron. Each sparkling has a special bond with their creators, enabling them to know where the sparkling is, how the sparkling is doing, and so on. These bonds stay in place usually until the sparkling is moved into an older frame, sometimes a youngling or sometimes even older, occasionally your version of a teenager. Just because two creators might raise more than one spark does not make the sparklings siblings. They are not related. The closest things to siblings we have is the twins. An occurrence like theirs is rare, when one spark splits into two, and it often results in the death of the two sparks. If they are able to be placed in two frames fast enough then the two will live, but they will always need to be near each other. …Epps, how could you possibly have a question?" Prowl asked, sounding exasperated as he looked at the Sergeant that had raised his hand.

"Birds and the bees." Epps grinned. "NOT IT!"

"NOT IT!" Miles, Sam, Mikaela, Glen, Will, Fig, and even Trent chimed in seconds after. They all turned to look at Maggie.

"W-what!" Maggie sputtered. "That is ju- That's just not fair! I don't want to give them __The Talk__!"

"Wha's wrong with talkin' to us, Mags?" Jazz asked, the only Cybertronian willing to voice their confusion, though it was obvious the rest were confused too. Only Bumblebee knew the mysterious rules of the 'Not It', and even he didn't know why it was being used.

"No, Jazzy baby, _The Talk_. Two capital T's." Epps explained as it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Also, _The Three A's_. NOT IT!"

Maggie yelled not it almost directly afterwards, with Will, Glen, Fig, Trent, and Mikaela following right after. Sam and Miles looked confused; the two had been helping Wheeljack give the Dinobots a bath and were out of the loop.

"What's _The Three A's_?" Miles asked.

"Abortion, abandonment, and abu-" Epps was saying, when Sam cut him off with a loud 'not it!'.

Miles cursed, "Slag! Maggie, I'll trade you _The Three A's _for _The Talk_."

"Oh no," Maggie said. "I'm suddenly very happy with _The Talk_."

Prowl made a coughing sound to draw their attention. "We do know how humans reproduce."

"I'm home free then. Looks like its up to you, Miles." Maggie smirked.

Miles glowered, "Ugh, fine, leave the teenager to do the adult's work. Who here, besides me, doesn't just have biological parents or parent raising them?"

"Me." Trent replied. Maggie, Sam, Mikaela, Fig, Will, Glen, and Epps saying nothing.

"Okay, step-parent or what?" Miles asked.

Trent just grunted in confirmation, causing Miles to roll his eyes. He carefully climbed down from his spot on Barricade's shoulder, and stood in the 'con's hand. He grinned.

"Okay, class, we will begin with parents, or as you Cybertronians would call them, creators. There is more than one type of creator for a human, so we will start off with biological. Now, can anyone tell me what a biological creator is?" Miles seemed completely ready and willing to act as if he was teaching a class, waiting until a Cybertronian raised their hand.

Ratchet did so, and Miles called on him with a grin. "A biological creator is one who actually is related to the sparkling, or child in this case. If it is the mother they provided the egg and half of the DNA, and if it is the father they provided the sperm and other half of the DNA."

"Correct! Now, the first thing we will go over is adoption. This means, for some reason, a sparkling's biological creators are either no longer with it, are not deemed fit, or can not care for them, and they are placed in facilities designed to house kids who are waiting to be adopted. Adopting a sparkling means you legally become the sparkling's creators, and the biological creators no longer have any real say to it. Any questions?"

There was no answer, leading Miles to believe that there was no questions.

Miles couldn't stop the smirk from coming on to his face, "Okay, now here's a real life example. My biological femme creator died, causing my biological femme creator's creators to adopt me, which means they are my legal creators. That makes my biological femme creator my legal sister. Got that?"

"How the frag does that work out?" Ironhide growled. "What happened to your biological father?"

"I was a whoops baby. He disappeared." Miles explained, forgetting they wouldn't understand his terminology.

"He wha'? Tha's awful, mah man. We should look for 'im!" Jazz said, and Bumblebee nodded in agreement.

All of the humans suddenly looked varying degrees of awkward, glancing at each other and then back to the Cybertronians. Miles attempted to regain their attention, but they just continued in their plans.

"GUYS!" Sam yelled, gaining their attention quickly. "No."

Miles rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Well, class, this brings us to our first two a's. Abortion. When I said I was a whoops baby I meant I wasn't planned. My biological creators had sex without ever meaning for me to come up. My mech creator was pressing my femme creator for abortion. Abortion is… well it kills the sparkling while it's still in the womb. The sparkling never gets the chance to even live."

There was stunned silence around the table, as if the Cybertronians had never heard of something quite like that idea before.

"If you can't guess my femme creator was against it, and lil ol' annoying me is here to talk face to, er, metal with all of you today." Miles said after a moment, trying to break the sudden tension.

It didn't work, though. The teen sighed, sharing a look with Sam. He knew his friend was thinking along the same lines as he was. The Cybertronians just seemed so much more perfect compared to them, sometimes. There was no cheating, when two Cybertronians got together that meant they were sparkmates and would literally be unable to leave each other. It also seemed like they didn't have abortion, but then again they mostly had to use some giant cube thing to make their babies, so that wasn't too much of a surprise.

"I can see why he _disappeared _then." Barricade growled after a moment, "Your femme creator must have killed him for such thoughts."

Miles laughed, "Sorry, Barry, but no. That brings us to our second a of this little real life example, abandonment. When my femme creator refused to abort my mech creator left. Meaning he quit the relationship, quit her, refused to accept me, support us, etcetera etcetera. My femme creator moved back to Tranquility after that, back with her creators, so she could have support for the both of us."

"What happened to her?" Wheeljack asked, sounding both fascinated and horrified.

"She offlined when I was… either eight months or eleven months old." Miles stated. "I always get her and her femme creator's sister, my legal aunt, mixed up."

"How do you forget when your own mother died?" Trent asked with a snort.

Will, Epps, and Sam visibly tensed, waiting for Miles to snap something back at him. The Captain knew that Sam and Trent had talked some and were getting along somewhat better, but Trent and Miles had never had that opportunity yet, and he didn't know if Sam had told his friend that the jock was turning out to be okay. But Miles just laughed.

"Seems a bit insensitive doesn't it?" Miles grinned, "But I didn't know that my legal creators weren't my biological _and_ legal creators until sixth grade. I always thought they just had me super late and up until that point she'd just been some stranger that I hadn't even known, a daughter that they lost but I'd never met. I mean it was sad, sure, but we never really talked about her until after they told me, so I never bothered to care much."

"Why didn't they tell you that they were not your biological creators?" Bumblebee asked, shifting Sam a bit so he was holding his charge.

"So I'd turn out normal, I guess. I grew up thinking I had loving creators." Miles paused in his reply for a moment as he considered something. "I mean, if I had known they weren't my biological creators, I would still have been happy and felt loved, but knowing that my biological mech creator ditched me probably would've made me have some issues, I guess. I dunno, since they did it the way they did it always feels like I'm talking about two people who are just people to me, not my biological creators. My legal creators are the ones I see, love, and think of as my creators. The biological ones don't feel like it."

And it was true, talking about his biological parents always made him feel as if he was talking about someone else's parents. He had accepted his grandparents, his legal parents, as his real parents and that wasn't going to change. The how or why of it didn't bother him a bit, though there had been the expected freak out over being lied to for most of his life. Sam had been there to help calm him down, then.

"Now," Miles sent a smirk in Trent's direction, "I think my teaching assistant can take care of our second real life example."

"Right," Trent muttered, standing up and glancing around the table. "I have a step-father. My original parents—fuck, creators, I mean—got divorced. I stayed with my biological mom and she remarried, so I got a legal second father, called my step-father. It can get a bit confusing when people marry, since the same term is used. One person's parents become the step-parents of the, uh... sparkmate thing."

"What happened to cause your creators to split up?" Wheeljack asked again. It seemed as if the rest of the 'bots were content on him asking all the questions. He was a scientist after all.

"My dad—my biological _creator_—was a fucking abusive asshole. Mom dumped his ass after so long." Trent replied with a glower.

Wheeljack tilted his head to the side as if contemplating what Trent had said, a habit he'd picked up from Mikaela. "Abusive?"

This time it was the humans who fell silent. No one wanted to make Trent explain, it was beyond obvious that it was a sore topic for the teenager if his current facial expression was anything to go by, but no one else really wanted to explain it either.

"When someone is abusive in a relationship it means that they hurt someone else physically or mentally. Sometimes both." Will finally said, sighing. "This can be between a couple, and I'm not going to use the term sparkmates because I know for a fact that your sparkmates would never do that to each other, or between creator and sparkling."

And the meeting suddenly turned into a jumble of voices as the Cybertronians all started to ask questions and voice their disbelief. Humans and Cybertronians were alike in a lot of ways, but this meeting helped to remind them that there was a lot of differences, too. And sometimes they weren't all good. But it was suddenly called into attention again when Miles' phone went off lightly, making the teen flush and give an embarrassed look around the table before he actually managed to answer it.

"Hey, mom." Miles greeted, then paused. "Right now? We're kind of..."

The teen let out a loud groan and then immediately apologized into the phone before holding it out towards Barricade. The 'con formed his holoform and took the phone immediately, surprising everyone and mech around the room as he greeted the teen's mother in a chipper voice that none of them had heard before and then proceeded to thank her for something. He then put the phone to his chest in order to stop any sound from going through.

"Permission to travel to Tranquility to have lunch with his parents?"

Optimus stared at Barricade for a moment, "Uh... Is it a special occasion?"

"It's Officer Barry's birthday," Miles grinned for a moment, "Or so my mom is convinced. And my mom is quite charmed by Officer Barry."

Bumblebee laughed at that and Barricade shot him a withering look for it.

"Don't worry, I'll have your daughter home before midnight." Miles promised when Optimus didn't respond right away.

The Prime raised an optic ridge, "Just promise to use protection and I won't worry about her making it home on time."

Barricade growled but said nothing against it, instead he took a moment to inform Miles' mother that they'd both be there no later than two.

* * *

Sam gave a small wave as Barricade's alt mode started to leave the base. He could already hear Miles and Barricade sniping back and forth at each other through the open windows, and he rolled his eyes before turning to find his Guardian staring down at him.

"Seeing them off?" Bumblebee asked.

Sam nodded, "Yeah. It's weird, I always forget they had time together before they came to base, y'know?"

"Indeed," Bumblebee replied. He lowered his servo so his Charge could climb into it, and then started to walk towards the cafeteria. "For all of Barricade's reluctance to show how close they are, I think it's always the most obvious after there's a fight and they make up."

"Yeah, they're both much happier, aren't they?" Sam questioned idly, "Talking and getting on. I mean, they talked some before, but it was... not the same."

"I can't help but wonder how Barricade is when it's just the two of them."

"Not as defensive, apparently." Sam grinned, "Something about being around you 'bots makes him get riled up, according to Miles. That was one of the things he complained most about when he came to base that first time. Said Barricade took about fifty steps backwards in the feelings department as soon as he was near y'all."

"Well, I do imagine it's been difficult on him." Bumblebee mused, "I doubt I'd be as friendly and open if I had to go into 'con territory, even if it was with you. I can understand it, in a way. I wouldn't want you to be used against me, or for them to think we're too close and if I upset them then there's nothing to do but get rid of you."

"Do you think _Barricade_ actually put that much thought into it?"

Bumblebee glanced down at his Charge, "I think he put more thought in to it then we could understand. Miles, too, for that matter. He had something to protect as much as Barricade did when they first came here. More so, I imagine, because Barricade would have been ready to leave him if need be."

"And now Barricade's birthday is being celebrated by Miles' family," Sam snorted. "Bet he never saw that coming."

"No, probably not." Bumblebee laughed, "But... what do you think would be a good birthday for me?"

Sam smirked up at his Guardian, "Jealous that Barry's getting cake and you aren't?"

"I-hardly, it's just that-" Bumblebee started to sputter, but he stopped when Sam started to laugh.

"June 11th," Sam laughed. "That'll be your birthday."

"That's yours, Sam."

"I know. I want to share with you."

That got him a pleased warble, and Sam grinned. Sometimes Bumblebee really was too easy to please.

* * *

It was late at night and Miles was making his way back from Barricade's hangar to the barracks where he, Sam, and the soldiers slept. The meeting about family and death had taken place earlier that morning, running about three hours longer than anyone had thought possible because of the sheer amount of questions both sides had wanted to ask each other. It hadn't helped at all after his mother called, of course. He'd never bothered to actually mention that Barricade had met and befriended his parents while pretending to be Officer Barry. But even when the directions hadn't been pointed at him or Barricade, there had been a lot of both organics and Cybertronians trying to understand each other better. Mostly the Cybertronians were stuck trying to fit their processors around the idea of abuse in its many forms and the humans had their own questions, least of all about the seemingly weird burial practices that the alien robots held.

After the meeting Miles had been nabbed by Prowl, Barricade following after with his customary glower. They all talked about his own parents, Prowl making it clear that he didn't understand how his parents could befriend Barricade's false identity so easily, but then they moved on to Prowl's and what little bit Barricade would mention of his own. Both Prowl and Miles were a bit shocked to learn that Barricade himself was almost as young as Bumblebee. The human equivalent would put him around mid to early twenties, while the yellow Autobot scout would be around the same age as Miles and Sam.

And after that he and Barricade had gone to Tranquility to have a nice lunch with his parents. The 'con was always much nicer around them, though infinitely more annoying in that he took a bigger kick out of teasing or making fun of Miles. But it had made his mother happy and his father had talked politics with Barricade, so it hadn't been a bad day. Going back to base for dinner had been less fun since Ratchet had grabbed him to find out everything he knew about Cybertronian anatomy, and he had only just escaped the medic's servos.

The teen knew where just about everyone was at that moment if he actually wanted to locate anyone. Mikaela had gone with Ratchet to watch him perform a check up on Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, most likely bugging him to teach her more things in case something like Huffer were to happen again. Sam had gone out for a very long drive with Bumblebee, leaving Fig and Epps to annoy Will instead. Trent had returned home that afternoon. The night itself was rather cool, and most of the mechs and soldiers were sleeping at that point. Miles hummed to himself as he walked along, some odd tune that Bumblebee had played earlier at the meeting in response to something that had gotten stuck in his head, and he never heard the light foot steps as they came up behind him.

He had no idea anyone was there at all until he felt strong arms slip around him, one hand firmly finding its place on his mouth. He didn't even have the chance to scream.

* * *

The next morning no one was able to find Epps, which in itself wasn't enough to cause any worry. However, Miles was also no where to be found, which more then likely meant that they were both in the same place and that poor Miles was at the older man's mercy. While this was discussed at breakfast, no one really bothered to do anything about it. It was still early, and no one wanted to have to put up with the craziness that was Sergeant Robert Epps, let alone when it was Epps and one Miles Lancaster, for that matter.

It wasn't until Will received a call from Epps, asking for both him and Sam, that anyone bothered to actually look for where the two were. He was surprised to find them in the makeshift Communications and Control room, Blaster inside of it with them. Both of them were sitting side by side, huddled around one of the screens and Blaster seemed to be ignoring them, probably having dealt with whatever they were up to for the last couple of hours.

"What's up?" Will asked, moving towards the back of their chairs.

"One word my friend," Epps said, grinning. He looked back at them, but Miles continued to stare at the screen. The teen hadn't moved once since they had come in. "Fanfiction."

"Excuse me?" Will asked, raising an eyebrow. He knew what fanfiction was, of course, he just didn't get how it applied to the situation.

Here Blaster cut in, his tone dry. "You are aware of the NEST website, yes? Well, of course you are, you're one of the main members, but my point: the site itself is split into three parts. The first and most important part is the part where you organics and my people can communicate together and share things. The other two parts are a human side and a Cybertronian side, blocked to the other side so that we may speak freely of our co-workers. Any slandering is prohibited; I personally watch over the logs on the Cybertronian side to make sure there is nothing too rude said. Fig is my human counterpart in that manner, the moderator of the human side, if you will.

"Oh," Sam said simply, a growing sense of dread could be seen in the teen's eyes. He suddenly wanted to leave the room, and quickly at that. He sent a pleading look to Will.

"So... The human side has fanfiction?" Will asked, taking a bit longer to get it, and not noticing the pleading look that Sam sent him.

"It would seem so," Blaster replied. The mech paused as he glanced at Will and Sam, "You organics are very imaginative when it comes to how we have 'sex' as you would call it."

At the word sex they could see Miles twitch, turning his head to look away from the screen as quickly as he could. Beside him Epps snickered.

"Reading that threesome between him, Prowl, and 'Cade seemed to make him 'glitch'." Epps said, voice strained as he tried to keep from laughing. "Y'know, apparently some people think Miles has a cop car fetish."

Miles practically growled, "Well at least some don't think I have a thing for Will and like to creep on him when he and Ironhide fuck."

"That was one story! One!" Epps huffed, glaring at the teen.

Blaster got up, nodded at Will, then quickly left the room. They could hear it as he engaged the locks, and seconds later a base-wide message was made, so that everyone, humans and mechs alike, could hear it.

_"_Lockdown in the communications room. There seems to be an odd virus spreading from 'fanfiction'. It has infected many on the base and currently Epps and Miles are battling a terrible case of it. Sam and Will are in there; I can only assume that Miles and Epps will infect the two of them. May Primus save them all... And Bumblebee, look up fanfiction before you freak."__

Miles laughed at the mock-warning. Epps got up from his seat and moved over to where Blaster had been sitting, accessing one of the largest screens in the room and putting in his ID and password before going to the side of the NEST website that he wanted to. The screen was large enough that they all could see it without needing to crowd together.

"No, dudes," Sam said softly, staring at the door. He was hoping that Bumblebee would freak anyway and attempt to save him. "No way."

Miles smirked, "When you're old and wrinkly, and your grandchildren are gathered around you, don't you want to tell them you braved NEST fanfiction?"

Will and Sam looked at each other, and then shook their heads in unison. They preferred riding in the sentient cars and talking to them, not avoiding them and never looking them in the optic. But alas, they were locked in, and Miles and Epps were a challenge on their own. Together they were impossible to refuse. So they were dragged into it, Epps even going as far as threatening to handcuff Will's arm to the armrest of one of the chairs to get him to stay, then doing it when the Captain still refused. Miles took the more subtle approach and just guilted Sam into doing it.

They sat there, eyes widening as Miles and Epps explained the lengthy list of pairings. There was two general categories; mechxmech and mechxhuman. They listed some of the more popular mechxmech pairings first and then just ones they found funny. PrimexProwl, PrimexIronhide, IronhidexRatchet, RatchetxSunstreakerxSideswipe, ProwlxBarricade, BlurrxBumblebee, BumblebeexPrime, BumblebeexIronhide, SunstreakerxSideswipe, BumblebeexProwl, ProwlxJazz, JazzxTrailbreaker, and more. There was a shocking amount. It was that, oddly enough, that made Will and Sam realize they'd never even really talked about sparkmates with their friends. They didn't know who wanted who, let alone if anyone was actually with someone.

Then Miles and Epps moved on to mechxhuman, the two quickly dumping their previous line of thinking in an attempt to just not think at all anymore. SamxBumblebee, SamxPrime, WillxIronhide, MilesxBarricade, MilesxBarricadexProwl, SamxMilesxBumblebee, JazzxEpps, SunstreakerxSideswipexFig, SunstreakerxFig, TrentxBlaster, TrentxMilesxBarricade, TrentxSamxBumblebee, SarahxWillxIronhide, MikaelaxSamxBumblebee, BlurrxMiles, MilesxProwl, EppsxWillxIronhide, MaggiexProwl, and more.

"Oh, here's one," Miles said cheerfully, clicking on it. "Title: A medbot's duties. Summary: Ratchet makes sure that his patients are happy and relaxed in every way possible. Organics and 'bots alike."

Epps looked, clicking an arrow to show the chapter titles. He laughed, "How nice, each chapter says which couple it will focus on. RatchetxPrime, RatchetxProwl... Oh Primus, Ratchetxthe twins. I'm not even sure how that would work, we avoided reading the threesomes for the most part. Except Miles' sexy time with Prowl and 'Cade. Of course that was holoforms..."

He clicked the chapter with the twins, scrolling down to the whole point of that particular story. The crazy robot interfacing.

"Ratchet had always fixed them up," Miles read from the screen. "Always took such good care of them, even if they pranked the poor medbot endlessly. Even as he thought this, Sideswipe felt a grin form on his face as he watched his twin kiss Ratchet, glossas dancing for dominance, and grip the medic's aft. It was their turn to take care of the medic."

Sam snickered, "I vote we download this and send it to Ratchet anonymously. Tell him to stop fraggin' everybot and their humans too."

The teen shoved Miles away from the screen, moving over and putting in his own search. By this point Sam had decided that if he had to be there and suffer, he could at least have some fun with it. He glanced over at Epps, seeing the Sergeant smirk as he read the new search that came up. Miles and Barricade, a personal favorite of his.

"Title: Bad kitty." Sam read, Epps snickering beside him. Miles moved back beside Will, groaning and trying to plead with his friend to stop. "Guess your Halloween costume was pretty popular, eh, _kitty_?"

"Barricade watched as Miles curled up happily in Prowl's lap in the Autobot rec-room, Prowl reading a datapad with one hand as he stroked the teen's head with one finger gently." Epps started to read, doing so in his best dramatic tone. "For once, he kept his rage inside. Miles had been _his_ first, and Prowl had no right to touch what was _his_. But Barricade wasn't stupid, anything but, in fact. He knew if he acted wrong it would only scare Miles off completely, and that was the last thing he needed. So he had enlisted the help of Bobbie an-"

"Bobbie?" Will cut in, "Who else calls you that besides Sarah?"

Will and Epps both knew that, outside of a few occasions, Sarah was the only person to frequently do so. There was a reason that he wanted to be known as Epps for, after all.

"Hmm, a BBTlover, apparently." A pause as Epps opened up the person's profile on another page. "BBT stands for Big Black Truck. Oh my God, it's Sarah!"

He laughed, quickly clicking on the link that would take him to BBTlover's fanfiction. He scanned it quickly, smirking when he found what he was looking for, because it was perfect. It didn't matter that it wasn't Sarah, they couldn't tell that. Fanfiction was set up with usernames and you couldn't tell who was who unless they put their names willingly, or leaked too much info.

"What?" Miles exclaimed, looking at Will with wide eyes.

Will smirked, "Better you then me, kid. Sorry."

"Oh, she has some of you and Hide, too, Will." Epps said, the smirk being heard in his voice as he pulled one of them up and began to read. "Ironhide had just found out it was Will's day of sparking, and while he didn't understand their strange organic costumes, he supposed he could get the Captain a gift. He had asked Sarah, who knew too much for her own good, and she had suggested something that was sure to relieve some of Will's stress, a di-pfffffffffft! A dildo!"

There was nothing but silence as they all turned to look at Will. For a few seconds he just stood there and they were afraid he would pull a Prowl. Instead, he quickly came back to himself, activated the base wide comm and begged loudly to be let out until someone finally took pity on him and took him away from the other three and to the rec-room.


	19. Chapter 18

By the time the joke was found out it was already too late. There had been a water cooler in the rec-room with an unknown liquid on it simply labeled as human energon. It had already been there for several hours and had, in fact, became the center of attention for that day.

Glen had been the one to start the betting pool this time around, using a large dry erase board to keep track of the needed information. No one questioned why Wheeljack, Sunstreaker, and Sideswipe's holoforms were there because they figured that it was a simple answer; Sideswipe and Sunstreaker had invented whatever the strange concoction happened to be and Wheeljack was either there because they blackmailed him so Ratcher wouldn't have to find out if a human happened to have a negative reaction to it, or because he was curious himself. The three mechs knew exactly what the liquid was, but around dinner time they felt it was safe enough to leave the room and just keep tabs on the video feed that came out of it.

Up until about an hour after they left, only Will had been able to down an entire cup of the pink liquid. Most hated the taste and couldn't stand more than a sip, but the Captain had no problem with it. That didn't mean his stomach agreed with his taste buds, though. Half an hour after drinking it he was puking his guts out, a reluctant and terribly confused Ironhide ordered to watch over him and keep track of his sudden illness. Those who might have been ordered to watch over him otherwise were some of the last people he wanted near them after what they had started reading, so Wheeljack had decided that his Guardian would do just as well as long as Ratchet didn't find out.

It was only after the three holoforms dispersed that three new challengers arrived to take on the challenge. Miles, Sam, and Epps had decided that they'd spent entirely too long disturbing themselves and had gone to the rec-room to take a break, quickly finding out what was going on about with the pink liquid. Like Will, they didn't find the pink liquid to be as detestable as everyone else had. In fact, all three quickly beat the Captain's one glass record, cheered on by Glen and several others.

It tasted odd, something that couldn't really be described flavor wise, but they didn't think it was bad. Sam even texted Will to taunt him, flaunting how even Epps had a stronger stomach than him. He didn't get a response from the Captain, but he did get an angry message from Ironhide that warned him off from being any meaner, so he didn't bother to send anything else. Epps dropped out around his fifth cup, but Miles and Sam kept going strong. Of course they didn't drink it all at once, they took minor breaks in between to play games or do other things, but both were determined to beat each other. Miles was half way through his tenth cup and Sam had just started his own when Bumblebee, Ratchet, Barricade, Ironhide, and Prowl stormed in to the rec-room, the twins and Wheeljack following in their wake and looking less than pleased.

The two teens paused mid-sip, realizing that most of the holoforms looked absolutely furious and that probably wasn't a good thing. Bumblebee and Barricade stormed over to them and snatched their cups right from their hands.

"Barry!" Miles protested, "I was just about to beat Sam!"

"What in the pit were you two thinking?" Bumblebee demanded, tone chiding. "Drinking an unknown substance like that! You're not children!"

Sam and Miles said nothing, knowing that there was nothing to say if it was Bumblebee using that tone against them. They shared a nervous look and then pointed to the sign that read human energon, as if to say that they did know what they were drinking, that it had been harmless.

"Well, about that..." Sideswipe started reluctantly, "The human part should really be changed to Cybertronian, or perhaps both should just be left off altogether.

"You're saying that we just drank energon?!" Epps cried, standing up. He looked at the two younger males, "Fuck, honest to God energon and you two have had like ten cups!"

Out of the three of them, Epps realized it was a bigger situation by far than either teen did. He knew that humans shouldn't have been drinking the stuff at all, knew that it was bad for organics from a conversation with Jazz long ago, and all of them had consumed a few glasses, the teens far more than he himself had. Sam and Miles just shared a confused look at his worried stare.

"So what's it gonna do to us, anyway?" Miles asked, "Are we gonna end up puking everywhere like Will?"

Silence for a few seconds as the Cybertronians looked in between each other. Even in their holoforms they could access their comm links and react to each other based off that, but it didn't make the silence any less annoying for the three.

"We are not sure," Ratchet's holoform said finally, stepping forward. "Only you four have shown any significant difference to it. Every other organic who has drank it has shown distaste after one sip, reportedly those who didn't spit it out immediately felt queasy afterword. William thought it tasted fine, but is now in the process of purging his stomach of it completely. You three have not only drank more than everyone else, but have not shown any signs of it not agreeing with you."

"So..." Miles trailed off, looking at Ratchet wearily.

"Energon is not meant for organics." Prowl stated simply, the only calm face among the holoforms. "One sip will do no harm, though it might cause a bit of an upset. One cup is beyond pressing it. Captain William Lennox is lucky that he is seeming to handle it well through purging his tanks and that it hasn't started to eat through his stomach lining. You three should definitely not be doing so well."

Most of the others who had tried the energon had spit it back out, or barely even managed a swallow. That was also when Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, and Wheeljack had been watching. They knew that more then one cup would be bad for a human, but Will had been an interesting change to how their favored organics had reacted, and they had watched with amusement as Will chugged one down.

Either way Ratchet had made sure to have Glen get everyone who had swallowed it together. It appeared soon enough that anyone it didn't agree with just threw up, getting it out of their systems soon after consuming it. There was only about five people who had done so, each of them having consumed about half a glass through sheer will power alone. An eye would be kept on all of them, but for now they were not the most pressing matter. Miles, Epps, Sam, and even Will were. Though Will, who had already emptied his stomach, was second priority to the others.

* * *

After finding out what the pink liquid had really been, the three humans had traveled without complaint to the med-bay. They sat quietly through test after test after test for a few hours, Ratchet working hard to make sure they were alright. The medic was nothing but thorough; he even resorted to doing some tests over and over again. They were more than a bit worried about it themselves, but the longer it took the more annoyed the two teens seemed to get.

On Miles' part he had been up all night the night before, having been essentially kidnapped by the Sergeant to read fanfiction, so by the time six hours had passed and it was around two in the morning he had started to get more than a little cranky. He had already accepted the fact that freaky alien shit would happen to him almost directly after finding out about Barricade, so long without sleep meant he had stopped caring for that moment in time. Sam was fairing better than his friend, but he was tired as well and just as unwilling at that point, after six hours of testing, to continue through with much more. They had been poked and prodded, asked to pee in cups, scanned multiple times, and the medic had even considered inducing vomiting before Epps had flat out told him no. Epps, having gone without the same amount of sleep as Miles, was actually more surprising in that he just sat and watched tiredly, remaining relatively quiet outside of the time he had flat out told Ratchet no.

Ratchet and the three humans weren't the only ones in the med-bay. Optimus Prime and Prowl were standing side by side, conversing quietly in Cybertronian. Bumblebee and Barricade sat together on a berth, passing a datapad back and forth to play some game together. Jazz was standing just slightly behind Epps' perch, allowing the Sergeant to lean back on him and nod off a little bit, while Ironhide was with a sleeping Will in the corner.

At some point, Miles and Ratchet had started to fight. It had started with Miles wanting to go to sleep and the medic saying it might not be the best idea as it would disrupt his scans. Of course, that had been at the beginning of their little row, when both had still been responding to the other in a slightly reasonable way. It had since devolved into nothing but the two throwing insults back and forth; Ratchet threatened to turn Miles into a toaster a lot and Miles used Sam's collected list of insults to rip into the medic.

Epps and Sam had watched in mild amusement at first, sharing exasperated looks with each other. When the argument reached the ten minute mark, Sam sighed and glanced over to his Guardian. This got Bumblebee's attention immediately and he gestured the 'bot closer. When the Scout was close enough he whispered in his audial, grinning as he watched Bumblebee's optics dim—a sure sign that he was searching the internet. The blue optics brightened once more and he looked down at Sam with obvious amusement.

He got Epps' attention then, as the older man had been nodding off, and they turned together to watch as Ratchet froze completely. It was quite comical to see, as his servos had been in mid-air to execute a threatening gesture. Miles blinked up at the medic in surprise, before glancing around to make sure that he wasn't the only one seeing the same thing, hazel eyes finally falling on Sam.

"You didn't," Miles whispered in disbelief.

Sam smirked, "I did."

All three humans jumped when they heard a loud crash, turning to see Prowl sprawled out on the floor with his optics dark. Optimus seemed just as surprised as they were, staring down at his SIC wordlessly. As one they turned to stare at Bumblebee, the Autobot practically glowing with glee.

"I sent him the one chapter just focused on him and Ratchet." Bumblebee explained, sounding oddly proud of himself. "He didn't crash after reading that one and just sent me an angry comm, so I sent back one with him and 'Cade."

Barricade raised an optic ridge, glaring at Bumblebee. "Excuse me?"

"The one where they keep Miles as a sex socket?" Epps asked, snickering slightly when Miles glared moodily at him.

"Send me whatever it is you two fools are talking about," Barricade demanded when Bumblebee nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes sir!" Bumblebee mocked.

Sam and Epps paid attention to their optics once more. Bumblebee's dimmed, then Barricade's dimmed. Bumblebee's brightened, but Barricade's stayed dim for a few seconds more. When they brightened again he looked over at Miles.

"Can you really bend your body like that?" The Decepticon Neutral asked, causing Epps and Sam to burst out laughing.

Miles just groaned, starting to climb off the berth that he and Sam had been perched on. He was clearly intent on leaving now that Ratchet seemed to be out for the count, but Optimus put his servo underneath him and trapped the teen on it. Before he could protest, the Prime had lifted him up enough to talk to him directly.

"Bend like what?" Optimus questioned.

Miles just stared at the Prime in a resigned manner. Like before, Bumblebee's optics dimmed as he sent the same fanfiction to his leader that he had to Barricade, then one with the Prime, Miles, and Sam, then one with Prime 'taking care of' all his soldiers, organic and Cybertronian alike.

"Oh, Primus." Optimus vented harshly after a moment.

"I know, big guy." Miles looked at him sympathetically, "And it's only gonna get worse with this lot."

Jazz laughed at that, moving to pick up the downed Tactitian. The Saboteur carefully placed Prowl on a free berth before moving and giving Ratchet a poke in the chassis. The medic didn't respond, but his optics were still dimmed, indicating that he was at least still on the internet.

"Ya know, Ah love how inventive ya humans are." Jazz said, amusement completely evident. "No' only 'ave ya taken ou' the Hatchet, bu' ya scarred poor Optimus, William, an' Prowler. Ah ain't sure if Prowler will ever be able ta look at Miles again."

"I'm thinking of creating my own account," Epps told his Guardian, "I'm personally a huge fan of Barry, Miles, and Prowlie, but I think my OTP has to be Will and Hide."

Ironhide smirked as he watched Epps have to duck to avoid being hit upside the head by one of Miles' shoes, "I think it's hilarious. I didn't know the good Captain could blush."

The laughter at that comment was stopped short by a loud grinding sound, several of them watching as Ratchet seemed to give a disgusted, full body shudder as his optics finally brightened back to their normal shade of blue.

"Frag," Ratchet cursed, sounding oddly strained. "That's it, all of you organics are leaving. I don't care anymore."

"They will be fine then?" Optimus asked, shifting Miles a bit so he could place the teen on his shoulder strut. Miles looked around, enjoying the height.

"To put it simply?" Ratchet asked, sounding more than a bit sarcastic. "I don't know. I don't know how they can take it, or why they can. I think it has something to do with the Allspark."

Even Barricade made an incredulous noise at that, all of the Cybertronians looking at the medic as if he had finally cracked.

"There's a slight contingency of Allspark energy residing in all of them," Ratchet stated, "Actually scan them to see for yourselves. Sam and Epps have the most, which I assume is because they both held the Allspark for longer and for when it was actually activated. Sam has just a bit more than Epps, which would make sense for the difference of power that it put out when they held it. I have absolutely no clue why Miles has any based off of that theory, however, or Will, for that matter, but Miles has more than the Captain."

"So why could I drink more then Epps?" Miles asked.

"I believe the nanobots are giving you an advantage over him," Ratchet responded. "It is Cybertronian technology, after all, even if they are completely new copies form what Wheeljack originally put in you. They are coded to you directly now, but it still gives the energy something to use that can understand it. It's helped to progress you to the point that Sam is at. Or it could just be because you are young and Epps is not, I honestly have no idea."

Optimus looked at Bumblebee, "You were able to commune with the Allspark. What do you think?"

"I am unsure, sir." Bumblebee responded, adding the entirely human gesture of a shrug to his words. "I can sense and commune with the Allspark to an extent, but until Ratchet said something I had no idea-"

The Scout cut himself off when Barricade sent him a comm, suggesting that they discuss it so the humans couldn't hear. Bumblebee agreed with that and switched them over to a private group comm with the rest of the Autobots in the room.

**:I had no idea Allspark energy resided in them until Ratchet told us to scan them. I am sensitive to the Allspark, as you all know, but I can not sense anything with them. However, the Allspark shard seems to disperse energy more then the Allspark cube ever did. Trailbreaker mentioned handing it to Miles during the fight, perhaps it leaked through the container and affected Miles. As for the Captain, I believe he held the cube at one point for a very short amount of time, and was around Epps when he used the shard on Jazz. Perhaps we should see if Fig has any energy as well.:**

**:It doesn't seem ta be havin' any negative effects on 'em,: **Jazz sent back.

**:Ratchet, what do you truly think?:** Bumblebee questioned.

For a moment the medic did not respond, and they turned to see him finally hovering over Prowl and working in an access panel on his helm. The medic waited another minute until he bothered to stop working on the SIC.

**:It does not seem to be harming them, as Jazz said.:** Ratchet said finally, **:In fact, it saved them. That much energon should have and would have killed a normal organic.:**

**:Any suggestions on what we should do concerning this, then, if it does not appear to be causing them any immediate harm?: **Optimus asked.

**:There is a human expression Will likes to use,:** Ironhide cut in, **:Go with the flow. Though he says he mainly uses it in battle, I believe it could be used here as well.:**

**:I suppose that is all we can d-:**

Optimus went to respond, but he stopped short as he felt something hit his helm, coming back to his surroundings in time to see a shoe fall back to the ground. There was silence for a moment before they all looked at Miles, still on the Prime's shoulder.

"Not me this time," Miles replied with a snicker, pointing at Sam.

"Since this is concerning us I believe we have the right to hear whatever you guys are _saying._" Sam snapped, letting his anger be known. "And I don't give a fuck what any of you say, I'm going home in the morning and so is Miles."

The teen had his hands placed firmly on his hips, standing tall even with one shoe missing. Both Miles and Bumblebee couldn't help but think he looked an awful lot like his mother in that pose. It shouldn't have been effective, but Sam, like his mother, had the uncanny ability to look intimidating when he shouldn't.

"We are sorry for doing that," Optimus apologized, though the Prime didn't bother to sound sincere. "For now you will be allowed to return home, as long as Bumblebee is permitted to scan you a few times per day."

Optimus set Miles down on the berth beside Sam. He watched as the teen looked at his friend, then all of them, and then repeated his looks. It was one of the first times he had actually seen him look unsure, almost unwilling, about something.

"What is it, Miles?" Optimus encouraged.

"I want to tell my parents about you." Miles replied, "The whole thing with NEST. I think enough stuff has happened at this point to constitute that, after all. And if anything does happen to me health wise they could be some of the first to notice if I'm not with Sam."

"Ohh, ohh, I wanna come!" Epps exclaimed cheerfully, causing Miles to give him an incredulous look.

Sam grinned, "I do think it would be good if you came, Epps. Also, Bumblebee, Barricade, and Prowl. My guardian and his two guardians."

"I am not his guardian." Barricade narrowed his optics.

"Unofficial guardian," Sam just waved a hand dismissively, "It counts."

Optimus nodded, "I shall come too. It sounds like a good idea."

Ratchet kicked them all out of his med-bay then. The medic would spend the next few days without recharge, dutifully making sure that his organic comrades wouldn't be harmed by the energon if he could help it. He would be relieved to find that only Will, Sam, Epps, and Miles had drank more then the recommended organic amount of energon. Even more relieved that only Will had reacted badly, and that it had been taken care of by purging his systems. After that he would try his hardest to predict what the Allspark energy would do.

* * *

After nearly half an hour of debate, which took place on the way to Tranquility, it was decided that Miles would collect his parents and take them to the look out. That way the Autobots and Decepticon Neutral could transform without fear of any immediate unwanted organics around. Optimus would go there to wait for them.

That just left three Cybertronians to actually go into the city itself. Sam rode in Bumblebee, Miles drove himself and Epps in his own car, and Prowl and Barricade used holoforms to make sure that no one was suspicious about them. Barricade and Prowl made sure to park in separate but nearby places in the neighborhood, Miles complaining that two cop cars appearing at his house that early in the morning could raise a lot of questions if there were any nosy neighbors.

The Scout got there first, seeing as he didn't actually have to park away from the house, and Sam already outside of him and waiting by the time Barricade's and Prowl's holoforms walked up. Sam went over to talk to Barricade in a low voice, smirking when the 'con nodded to what he had said. Then he went over to Prowl, muttering quietly to him as well, and the three walked up to Miles' front door together, Prowl standing in between Sam and Barricade with a mildly bewildered expression on his face.

Bumblebee just watched in mild amusement. Obviously his teen was up to something, but he didn't know what, so he had to wait. He watched as Sam knocked on the front door, it opening soon after to reveal Miles' mother, Elizabeth Lancaster.

Sam smiled at her, "Hey Lizzie, it's good to see you again!"

"What have I told you about just calling me mom or grandma, Sammie?" Elizabeth grinned, reaching out and ruffling Sam's hair. She then turned a sweet smile on to Barricade and Prowl, "Officer, always nice to see you. Who's the fine young man beside you?"

"My partner, Perry." Barricade told her with a smirk, wrapping an arm around Prowl's shoulders. "He's Miles' boyfriend."

In the blink of an eye Barricade and Prowl were gone from the front porch, dragged inside by Elizabeth. Sam smirked as he heard the 'con cussing him out, the only thing he was able to hear before the door closed. He walked back over to his Guardian, wearing a shit eating grin.

Bumblebee raised an eyebrow at him, "Do I want to know?"

"I'm just putting the fear of a mother in them; Lizzie can be worse then my mom sometimes." Sam replied innocently, grinning when Bumblebee started to laugh. "I told 'Cade that he'd be getting Miles back for Mason if he told his mom that. The poor fragger believed me."

"You're evil," Bumblebee grinned, "And I'm extremely happy I have you as my Charge."

The two watched as Miles pulled up, Epps and the teen getting out of his car. Sam went over to distract them for a bit, Bumblebee helping to keep the conversation flowing for a bit, because he enjoyed it when his charge was mischievous. He was grinning as he listened in to the humans, but it faded when Prowl commed him.

"Samuel, what is a rolling pin? Prowl seems terrified by it at the moment." Bumblebee asked, sounding confused. He didn't bother looking it up on the internet because he knew his teen would tell him.

At that Miles turned a mildly horrified and completely accusing look on his friend, "What the fuck did you do?"

"Had Barricade say Prowl was your illicit lover." Sam replied, smirking as Epps started to laugh.

"Sam!" Miles ran into the house, the two humans and one Autobot holoform following after him quickly.

"Miles!" Sam whined, "Don't ruin it just yet!"

"MOM PUT DOWN THE ROLLING PIN!" Miles yelled as he turned the corner to the kitchen, ignoring Sam completely.

Elizabeth blinked at her son, smiling innocently because she knew she had been caught red handed. Prowl and Barricade had been sat down at the kitchen table next to each other. From there she had gotten out her best rolling pin, threatening them with it and doing her best to loom over them menacingly despite the fact she was smaller than the both of them.

Prowl and Barricade were looking at her with wide eyes, having scooted even closer together when she waved her weapon of choice above their heads. Neither wanted to admit to being scared by an organic, but awhile ago Bumblebee had managed to talk the both of them into adding on human pain receptors, so they could feel more like their organic friends. That wouldn't do them as well if they were purposefully attacked with a wooden object by a crazed organic creator.

"Baby," Elizabeth cooed, setting the rolling pin down and moving over to her son. She hugged him, "I was just warning them not to hurt you."

"Mom, Barrica—_Barry_, was joking." Miles said a bit weakly, unable to refuse his mother a hug back. "The government thing I have going on? I've been given permission to explain it to you and dad, so I came here."

"Oh, _that_." Elizabeth tutted, stroking Miles' hair. "I already know. They're all giant aliens, though a bit more robotic than most of us expected. Prowl is the Second in Command of the Autobots, the blonde one is Bumblebee, another Autobot that doubles as Sam's car, and then Barricade is a Decepticon Neutral."

Miles stared at his mother, his shock more than obvious. Sam and Barricade, too, gave the older Lancaster a gobsmacked expression. Prowl seemed to be even more terrified now that he knew that the female had been willing to attack him anyway.

"Us mothers have to stick together," Lizzie said with a small smile, "Judy is rather helpful when I need to find something out and it happens to concern Sammie, too."

"How long have you known?" Miles asked, still staring at her with a shocked expression.

"Since I found out it involved Samuel," Lizzie replied easily, "So for almost the entire time that Sam himself knew, I expect."

"So what was yesterday?" Barricade growled.

Elizabeth laughed, "I wasn't sure if you robots actually had birthdays or not, and you've always been rather sweet. Easy way to check up on my boy, too."

"We were in the middle of a meeting," Prowl informed her with a mild glare. He wasn't stupid enough to continue the angry look when Elizabeth caught his stare and actually glared back, nor was he stupid enough to continue talking.

"I don't care, I wanted to see my son." Elizabeth responded, moving a few steps away from her son and towards the 'bot in her annoyance. "I am a mother. And mother's do what we need to protect our children. If my baby ever gets hurt because of you aliens then I fully intend to make sure you _suffer_. You all sleep at some point and your interiors _can_ catch fire. I imagine those windows of yours can be broken as well, yes?"

"Stronger than bullet proof glass, actually." Bumblebee supplied, nearly running behind Sam when Lizzie's annoyed look turned on him.

"Lizzie, I love you more then I ever did before." Sam sighed contentedly, reaching a hand out to rest it protectively on Bumblebee's arm despite his words. "Not even my mom threatened them this much."

Elizabeth laughed, "Who do you think was it that told me to use the threats that I did? She didn't know enough to be effective at that time, but now we both do."

"I hardly see how threatening us achieves anything," Prowl protested softly.

"It gets my point across, though." Lizzie smiled, grabbing the rolling pin and putting it back in it's rightful place. "Now, I believe that a visit is in order. My husband and I are interested in seeing this NEST place; I'm sure that Judy and Ron would like to come along as well."

"You guys are doomed," Epps whistled. "Two protective mothers with husbands who know better than to stand in the way? Completely screwed."

"I wouldn't say that," Elizabeth tsk-ed. "But Barricade, it would be awfully nice if you could give us a ride there and then maybe show us that tall form of yours?"

"Of course," Barricade responded kindly, showing that it wasn't just the youngest Lancaster who he seemed to favor.


	20. Chapter 19

As soon as everyone and mech knew that Miles' parents had known about them almost as long as they had known about the teen and Barricade, the two had been invited to come to the base for the weekend to see what they thought of it. Judy and Ron had been invited as well, Sam insisting that if Miles' parents got to come than his should, too.

Currently they were all sitting outside, using the space that Sarah had so long designated as a grilling and picnic area. Since then several actual picnic tables had been brought in and settled around the tarmac. Miles and Sam sat at a table with their fathers, Barricade, Will, Epps, Glen, Fig, and Bumblebee.

Ratchet's holoform walked up, his alt mode having been parked next to Bumblebee's, and he sat next to the two fathers.

"Ronald, Bob, I do believe I might be in love with your wives," Ratchet said, a grin on the holoform's face.

Ron Witwicky and Bob Lancaster turned in unison to just stare at the medic, waiting for an explanation. Bumblebee and Will did the same, looking at Ratchet expectantly. It was rare the CMO made time to join them, let alone time where he was initiating conversation almost directly. He was a busy mech and with the energon fiasco they had expected him to be even busier, but here he was.

Miles turned to Sam, "Dude. We'd be like half brothers or some shit if both my mom and your mom got with the Hatchet _and_ we'd have a Cybertronian in the family. How slagging cool would that be?"

That effectively broke the silence, Epps and Sam laughing. Ron and Bob turned to glare at Miles, Ron grumbling something along the lines of 'traitor'.

"I believe it's time for another beer, Bob." Ron said, grabbing two and handing one of them to his friend, before turning to look back at Ratchet. "Do I want to know why you're declaring your love for my wife, or should I not even ask?"

"I can't say I've ever seen anyone successfully shame Optimus into recharging before, but Elizabeth did it." Ratchet sounded a bit awe struck, "And Judy took Prowl. She even read him a bedtime story, but it was from a science book so he wouldn't glitch or spend time thinking over illogical things. I'm not sure if he sent himself to recharge or was actually put to recharge, but both Optimus and Prowl are currently fast asleep."

Bob nodded, "That'd be the mother in them. With Miles and Sam growing up they're reaching out for new ones to adopt. And I'd watch out for my wife, it doesn't matter if you're her relation or not, she will bend you over her knee if you're bad. But she'll also give you tons of food, a shoulder to cry on, or just a warm hug. I know that Judy happens to be at least somewhat the same, that's why they're friends."

"Sarah will be here in a few days with Annabelle. Maybe they can come together to become the mother's of the NEST," Epps suggested, causing Will to snort.

"Sarah will be more then overjoyed to have other mother's to talk to. Most of the girls here either aren't moms, too busy to be moms, or won't be here whenever she is." Will replied, "Sam, Miles, tell Judy and Liz to bring out the baby pictures."

Sam groaned, but Bumblebee perked up, smirking at his charge. Miles shot Bumblebee a questioning glance, prompting the Autobot scout to reply.

"Judy felt it necessary to show me the baby pictures of Sam once she found out I was alive. I have to say, a naked Sam with chocolate cake all over him is my favorite. Especially when he has some on his cute little aft."

"God, Bee!"

Most of the occupants of the table took a moment to thoroughly enjoy Sam's embarrassment as the teen proceeded to yell at his Scout for bringing said pictures up. Epps, Miles, and Glen guffawed; Will and Fig snickered; Ratchet and Barricade looked highly amused; Bumblebee smirked; and Ron and Bob smiled, shaking their heads in amusement. They popped the tops on their cans of beers and tapped them together.

"To them being in diapers seeming not that long ago, damn it." Ron said, grinning.

Bob nodded, "Makes you feel old, doesn't it?"

"Dad, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you were old before I ever arrived on the scene." Miles smirked, causing Bob to smack him lightly over the back of the head.

"Not so old that I felt like yelling at crazy whippersnappers to get off my lawn," Bob replied, then smirked. "Except this time it was crazy aliens."

Barricade glared, "Your beast was attempting to assert it's dominance over me."

"Wait… what?" Sam asked.

He and his Guardian had taken Epps and Prowl up to the look out so they could convene with Optimus. Bob, Barricade, Miles, and Lizzie hadn't appeared for over an hour, and when they did they didn't explain why they were held up. Bumblebee sat up straighter, eyes locking on to Miles. Epps and Sam did the same thing, silently demanding the story.

"Mason got a little… _friendly_ with Barry's leg," Miles told them. He seemed to be impervious to the death glare, because Barricade was trying extremely hard to kill him right there and then. The teen continued, though, not phased in the slightest by it. "Barry freaked out and tried to run, but Mason thought he was playing. I don't know if he glitched or if he's just that stupid, but instead of making his holo disappear he let Mason chase him through the house for about half an hour. Mom kept me from helping him because it was pretty funny, plus Masey needed his exercise for the day and it seemed like the perfect opportunity. But then he glitched some more and left the house, leaving the door wide open, and Mason chased him around outside for about fifteen or so more minutes. Imagine it. I'm standing there watching this advanced robotic being run from a fucking dog and then Mom's telling me to go save him and make sure Mason doesn't leave the yard, so then I have to go out and join the chase to either try to intercept Barry _or_ Mason. I finally managed to get Mason to listen when I said sit, or he just got tired out, but it was quite the thing to see."

Another pause before the whole human half of the table erupted in laughter, except for Miles and Bob, of course. They had laughed hard enough while it was actually happening, now the amusement was just toned down. Though on Miles' part the teen was fully aware that the 'con had most likely only done it to try and make his parents laugh and ease some of the worry they held about those freaky giant alien robots, something he was ever thankful for. He'd told Barricade in no uncertain terms not long after they met that if he so much as growled at his parents then he wasn't going to be helping him out anymore or anything and the 'con had respected that. No one messed with his parents.

"I was not _glitched_," Barricade tried to defend himself, "I just didn't want to scare your parents."

That backfired spectacularly, Miles grinning. "I think you just wanted Mason to catch you."

The laughter died out as they waited in amused silence to see what the Decepticon Neutral would do in retort. But the 'con just growled, apparently having nothing he deemed appropriate to come back with. That just happened to be a mistake concerning Miles.

"Ohhh, I made the big bad 'con go silent." Miles teased, wearing a shit eating grin.

Epps snickered, "I think a cat has his tongue!"

"That was good, mah bruder!" Glen high-fived Epps, purposefully sounding stupid just to egg everyone on more.

"Well, I can't say I'm surprised." Ratchet commented, "I always thought Barricade had a bit of a troubled processor."

"I did figure he'd at least be as smart as a human's computer," Bumblebee said mock-thoughtfully. "Guess I was wrong."

"A computer?" Sam asked, snorting. "He's not even up to par with Mason, let alone a computer."

It was probably when Sam joined in on the mocking that Barricade had enough. They knew this by the way his holoform stood up, rounded the table to Miles, and then proceeded to just lift the teen from his seat as he gave a shocked squeak, hoisting the teen up so he was half over his shoulder and struggling.

"Nice manly squeak there, joven." Fig snickered, "Where you taking him, Barricade?"

Barricade growled, "To the Pit."

"What?! Put me down!" Miles whined. "Someone help me!"

Bob waved, "Goodbye son. It was nice raising you."

"Traitors, traitors all of you!" Miles cried as he squirmed and wiggled in the 'cons grasp. He couldn't even escape when Barricade was holding him in place with one hand, and found himself hating the holoform's strength at that moment.

Everyone watched as Barricade and Miles disappeared from view with varying degrees of amusement. The Autobots around the table knew the 'con had probably had an ulterior motive for wanting to be chased around by Mason, but only Bumblebee bothered to actually ask. The Scout reported to the others the short explanation of Barricade trying to win the parents over; there wasn't much they could do, after all, if Elizabeth and Bob thought removing the teen from the base and their lives altogether was the best thing after they learned about what had happened with Ravage, the add ons from Wheeljack, and the energon. Miles wasn't even eighteen yet, but either way it was obvious that he was devoted to his parents. The 'con mentioned the threat the teen had made about being nice to his parents in the first place, something that had amused Bumblebee to no end.

"I'm going to put this on my fanfiction account." Epps said, grinning.

Will looked at him like he had gone insane. "Why?"

"Do you know how many people here will have a field day over what Cadey does to Miles?" Epps asked, his grin turning into a smirk.

"You are a devious man, Epps." Ron chuckled, Bob nodding in agreement. They had both heard Miles and Sam complain about that part of the NEST website by then. "I wholly approve you being around my son."

"I bet someone will write that Barricade humped Miles in retaliation or asserted his dominance of Miles or some crap." Glen said, grinning. The look quickly disappeared when Bob sent him a look. "Sorry, Mr. Lancaster. It's just so weird having a parent here that I forgot."

Bob snorted, "Tell me about it. I'm drinking a beer, and while Sam and Ron being here, with my son and wife in the general vicinity, isn't that odd, there are two aliens sitting at the same table, looking like perfect humans, and three military men. And whatever you are."

"I think I'm still in shock, and I knew the entire official story about two weeks after Mission City." Ron commented, once more tapping his can against Bob's.

"Please, I knew about it a few days before Mission City, and I'm still in shock." Will replied, grinning.

"Then I think you have been bumped up to the ranks of us beer drinkers, young man." Bob grinned, handing Will a beer can.

"What about me?" Epps whined.

"You enjoy my son being in perversions. I should kick your ass." Bob replied.

They all laughed, Epps and Fig taking a beer while Glen decided not to. They talked in a companionable way, Ratchet talking to Ron, Bob, Fig, and Will while Bumblebee talked to Sam, Epps, and Glen. Eventually Jazz walked up to the edge of the picnic area, activated his holoform, and walked over to them. He pushed Glen out of the seat next to Epps.

"Your femmes are wicked scary," Jazz said as he sat down, ignoring Glen's indignant sputtering.

"Tried to wake either Optimus or Prowl, didn't you?" Ratchet couldn't help a small smirk, "What for?"

"Blaster got a couple a' signals comin' in." Jazz replied, using one arm to effortlessly keep Epps in his seat when the Sergeant tried to get up to help Glen.

"We brudahs gotta stay together, Jazzy baby." Epps grinned, he did enjoy saying 'brudahs'. "Good signals or bad?"

"Brudahs in arms and color before brudahs in color, _Bobbie."_ Jazz teased, "And that depends. The two closest are a toss up."

"A toss up?" Sam asked. Next to him Bumblebee sat up a little straighter, and Ratchet looked at Jazz with disbelief.

"No." Was all the medic said.

"Yes." Was the simple reply.

"Frag." The Scout cursed.

The three then dissolved into Cybertronian. Epps and Sam frowned, looked at each other, and then nodded. They did rock, paper, scissors three times, Epps finally losing. He made angry gestures at Sam, who just smirked in reply. Finally the Sergeant started to count down on his fingers, waiting until he reached ten before reaching up and slapping Jazz over the head hard. Jazz immediately fell into a stunned silence, Ratchet and Bumblebee following his example as they looked at Epps in surprise.

"Hello, we stupid humans. We no speak advanced alien robotic shit. _Translate._" Epps glared.

Jazz rubbed the back of his head, looking at Epps with a betrayed expression. He was the head of Special Ops for a reason, and could usually melt anyone's spark, or heart, if he tried hard enough. Epps, however, wasn't having any of it. He continued to glare at all of them.

Jazz sighed, "The closest signals are the twins."

"¿Los gemelos?" Fig asked, confusion evident as Glen moved beside him. Glen hesitated a second when he spoke in Spanish, but as it was fairly evident as to what he said, he decided he was safe and sat next to the man after all.

"Yes. The second, younger, pair of twins." Bumblebee replied, "Skids and Mudflap are their designations."

Will raised an eyebrow, "Okay, so what's the big deal?"

"Yeah, do the twins major and twins minor not get along or something?" Sam asked, quickly shortening it and making it easier to define each set.

"Ya coul' say that, Sammy." Jazz replied, glancing at Ratchet and Bumblebee. "There ain't nothing' real wrong with Skids and Mud, they're just a bit _intense_. Ah'd strongly suggest not bein' under their peds, at all. They fight a lot—an' that's fightin' with _each other—_and they prank a lot and just generally make a mess outta their presences. Ah don't think ya actually need to 'ear about the twin wars that goes on between the two sets."

"I think we can handle them. They sound like overgrown sparklings." Will replied, rolling his eyes when Ratchet snorted in agreement. "You said they were the closest signal. What about the others?"

"Ah, righ'!" Jazz exclaimed, expression turning grim. "One of 'em is definitely 'con. The other Ah ain't so sure, Ah think it's Neutral, buh Ah'd need Prowler to 'ave a look at it. 'owever, he's recharging, and so is Prime."

As he talked his eyes turned elsewhere, and several turned to see Barricade was walking back. No Miles in sight.

"Decepticon?" Fig asked, but it was more of a _oh God damnit_ question then an actual question, accompanied with a groan. "Those things have been laying low for awhile."

Barricade sat down, "Starscream ran off awhile ago. We knew Soundwave was here, though."

"Starscream's the new leader, ain't he? Wouldn't he have to be here to order Soundwave around?" Epps asked.

"No," Barricade replied simply. "Soundwave was loyal to Megatron, like I was. I believe Soundwave was working on his own regarding trying to get the Allspark fragment from us."

Bumblebee sighed, "Do you think he's trying to get new Decepticon recruits?"

"It's possible." Barricade took a moment to think, "There were very few of us around here, and I know there are several others who hate Seekers. No way will they listen to Starscream."

"Ya'r certainly bein' more helpful than Ah ever thought ya would be, Barricade." Jazz said softly, examining Barricade.

Barricade sneered, "I'm loyal to Megatron, or _was_, not that half wit Seeker."

"You're more of a Lancaster then a Decepticon, now." Bumblebee stated with a grin.

"I'd still kill you in a heartbeat, if that's what you mean, Insect." Barricade growled.

Bob snorted, "Lizzie will love that. The Lancaster faction, thing. Another son for her to fuss over. Speaking of sons, where's mine?"

"I gave him to the twins," Barricade smirked.

"Yeah, you took him to the pit alright." Ratchet grumbled. Everyone laughed.

* * *

"So why do we have to stay behind?" Sam asked, staring up at his guardian with a pout.

"Skids and Mudflap are a bit... out there." Bumblebee replied, preferring to use that instead of Ironhide's usage of '_slagging glitched mistakes_'.

Miles snorted, "So much so that we can't come to their landing site, but we can go to the one where the 'con or 'cons will be?"

"Ironhide can shoot the 'con, but not the twins, isn't that right, Insect?" Barricade sneered.

Bumblebee nodded, grinning sheepishly. "That, and Ratchet plans to have some of you act as field medics. Your tiny hands can be useful. Like when Miles worked on Barricade."

"Wait, when did Miles work on Barricade?" Epps asked, thinking he missed some major aft kicking.

"Bee gave Barry quite the aft kicking, and he was left to lick his wounds alone." Miles grinned, then froze. "Uh, I mean… Well, frag, sorry Barry.

Everyone but Barricade snorted, the 'con doing his best to glare Miles in to an early death. He would be disappointed to find that it was still just as ineffective as before.

"Way to stick your pretty lil' foot in your mouth, __Mimi___._" Epps smirked.

Miles glared at the older man. When Barricade had sacrificed him to the Prankster Gods, otherwise known as Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, they had decided to make him into a drag queen and deem him Mimi. The teen was still searching for Fig, sure that it was him that had taken the pictures and was gradually spreading them around base.

The Neutral, or Neutrals, and the Decepticon, or Decepticons, would be landing in a few days, managing to happen during the week leading up to Thanksgiving. The Cybertronians could guess at the size of the ships the 'con and neutral were traveling in, but how many Cybertronians were inside was something they could only guess at.

Prowl entered the room then, having just exited the Communications room where they had been keeping in touch with Skids and Mudflap to ensure they followed the directions they had been giving for their landing. He went over to Miles immediately, picking the teen up in his servo.

"We've been found out," Prowl told his Charge.

"Wait, what happened?" Miles asked, ignoring the odd looks most of the others in the room were giving them.

"The twins found out. Wheeljack had been working on a device that allows humans to detect basic Cybertronian energy given off by both holograms and holoforms," Prowl explained, "Sideswipe and Sunstreaker are intelligent enough to realize that it was a possibily that they were being messed with, so they took it out for a test run for him without Wheeljack's permission. I apparently need to give them more credit and more brig time."

Miles had known that the SIC was going to initiate another stage of their plan to mess with the twins, but he hadn't known it was going to be that day. Now it seemed that they'd have to stop entirely.

"So they know it was you?" Miles asked, wanting to make sure he wouldn't be targeted as well.

"They took it before Wheeljack managed to add the coding to recognize particular energies," Prowl replied dryly. "So, luckily, both of us are safe. But either way we still must abandon our plans."

Miles sighed, "At least we won't be targeted, though."

Prowl just nodded, neither of them bothering to explain what was going on to the others in the room. Miles suggest that maybe they could recruit Skids and Mudflap to help them and focus their pranking solely on the twins major. It was one of the few times any of them had seen Prowl grin quite like that.

* * *

Sam, Miles, and Mikaela were just now being allowed into the same room as Skids and Mudflap, the three staring up at the goofy Autobots as the two began to fight almost instantly. They were promptly abandoned by Bumblebee, who muttered something in disgust and walked off to talk with Optimus and Ironhide.

One of them began to reach for Sam, the teen taking a step back even as the mech's brother shoved at him.

"_Ah _ge' ta hol' one of 'em first!" Skids growled.

"Naw, ya too ugly!" Mudflap retorted, shoving back. "Ya face'd scare 'em!"

"We twins, doofus! You callin' me ugly mean you ugly too!"

And it quickly dissolved into a brawl, the two brothers attacking each other as the humans watched with mild amusement. From what they had been told, and from the way the three other mechs just seemed to ignore the sudden ruckus, they knew it happened a lot.

It wasn't until Mudflap got a little too close, Miles having to take a large leap back to avoid a ped, that they realized they should move back. But by then it was too late, the three suddenly in the middle of two fighting Autobots. Sam yelped, trying to run for the safety of the other Autobots, but Mikaela had to pull him back so he wouldn't be hit by a servo that was aimed a little too low. Sam's yelp seemed to have alerted the others to the fact that the twins were being too stupid, Skids suddenly being grabbed by a black servo and tossed into a wall as Bumblebee raced over and sent Mudflap flying after his twin with a well placed kick. Mudflap landed on top of his brother, the twins becoming nothing more than a groaning heap of tangled metal for a moment.

The three teenagers raced to the safety of the Prime's peds, expecting the leader to start yelling at the two mechs. But it was Bumblebee who was the most furious, going over to where the twins lay and ripping into them in Cybertronian. They couldn't tell what was being said, but Skids and Mudflap had started to cower while Optimus and Ironhide were smirking at their Scout.


	21. Chapter 20

The five humans stood together in a wide expanse of open desert, binoculars practically glued to their faces as they watched the Neutral space craft be chased by the Decepticon space craft. The seven Cybertronians stood far away from their tiny organic friends, gesturing and attempting to talk to whoever was on the Neutral ship to get them to land so they could protect them. Currently the two ships were playing chase through the sky over their heads; it was already obvious who would win. The Neutral ship was surprisingly tiny and looked like it was barely managing to hold together; one could hardly see how it managed to fly, much less take the sharp turns necessary to avoid the Decepticon fire. Compared to the Neutral ship, the Decepticon ship was large and in much better condition.

Sam and Miles were there to act as mini-field medics for any wounded Neutrals. Both had received a crash course in Cybertronian anatomy; they were taught how to get in to the hardest to reach places for Ratchet and they found out about the places that would lead to immediate or fast death when wounded and why they shouldn't even bother to try to help then. Though Miles had a lot less to learn than Sam, something the med-bot had continuously grumbled about. They were also given a backpack to carry with Cybertronian symbols on it that declared them as field medics.

Will, Epps, and Fig were there as well, just in case the two teenagers managed to get in something that they shouldn't be in. Trailbreaker was brought along specifically to act as a shield either for Ratchet or the humans; Ironhide, Bumblebee, Sunstreaker, and Sideswipe were there to act as the brawn of the operation and take out the Decepticons; Optimus would go and guarantee peace and freedom for any surviving Neutrals once their ship landed and the Decepticons were no longer a threat; Ratchet would make sure to take care of any Neutrals, his own 'bots, and any 'cons stupid enough to beg for salvation.

Epps whistled, watching the two air crafts move around. "Alien. Definitely alien."

The other humans couldn't help but silently agree, despite all they had already been through with the seven Cybertronians nearest them, the sight above them just seemed to be the weirdest they'd seen so far. After the initial shock had worn off it was easy to accept the Cybertronians and not really think about how they came from outer space. It was even easier to accept when there had previously been little to no Decepticon activity, so the fighting had been non-existent for the human faction of NEST.

They were riveted by the chase going on above them; how the Neutral ship could evade the Decepticon ship for so long was unsure, a clear miracle, but their luck had run out. The Decepticon ship managed to land a hit, having dropped below the Neutral ship to fool it and managing to appear in front of them instead of where they were expected to. The blast breached the ship's hull and it went into a sudden nose dive. It wasn't right where the humans were standing, but it was close enough that the Captain panicked.

"GO, GO, GO!" Will yelled, not even needing a moment to think about it. He ran, the others not questioning his order and just immediately running after him.

It hit far enough away that they were completely safe, turning to look at the impact, but the tremor that rushed through the ground from it knocked them all to the ground. The following blast of hot air kept them down momentarily, the soldiers knowing well enough to close their eyes as soon as they saw it coming, but when nothing else happened and they could hear the Autobots calling to them the three soldiers picked themselves back up. Miles and Sam stayed down for another moment, dazed from the sudden fall and eyes watering from the blast of hot air that had kicked sand into their eyes.

Fig and Will took off running to where their Autobot comrades were, Epps staying behind to help up the two teens and make sure that they were alright. Trailbreaker broke away from his fellow Autobots, moving to the civilians and the Sergeant when Optimus ordered him to.

"Primus," Sam muttered, wiping at his eyes. "I thought I was all good with earthquakes cuz of Prowl, but I guess not."

"Prowl's not heavy enough to knock you two on your asses," Epps pointed out.

"Prime wishes for us to check out the ship," Trailbreaker told them, interrupting before any further inane conversation could be had.

The three humans nodded, letting Trailbreaker lead the way as he walked toward the downed ship. They had to jog to keep up with the mech, but none of them voiced a complaint at this. Cybertronians could be hurt on the ship, it was expected that Trailbreaker would be moving a little fast to get them there.

In the distance they could hear the sounds of metal clashing with metal, cannon fire, and gun fire, but they knew better than to look back, instead watching as Trailbreaker paused outside of the very obvious door to the ship. The opening in the hull wasn't big enough for him to slip the humans through, and he feared the metal being too hot to touch for them, so he settled for the actual door. The mech spent little time looking for a way to enter, instead starting to bash his way through. While he took a few minutes to do that the humans inspected the outside of the ship. It was much bigger up close, but they had been told that it was tinier than most Cybertronian ships, which were made to house hundreds comfortably. This one could probably hold about five mechs from the looks of it.

Once Trailbreaker had made a hole big enough for him to enter, he picked the three humans up, just holding Sam and Miles loosely together in one servo and the Sergeant in his other to get them inside. He placed them back down almost immediately, moving past them to the Command Center at the front of the ship. The humans heard him muttering in Cybertronian as soon as the door opened and as they got closer they could see why.

A mech was sitting at the controls, slumped over and the optics offline. There was evidence of him being in battle, poorly welded together wounds and stains of energon along the frame. Trailbreaker glanced down at them, but seemed to think better of it, going into the room himself and closing the door behind him.

"He's not going to make it," Sam said softly. He and Miles had both seen where the mech had been hurt the worst, one of the few places Ratchet had said meant immediate death because it cut through an important energon line and several important wires.

"Think Trailbreaker is going to make it easier on him?" Miles asked, voice just as soft.

Epps didn't bother to answer the question, instead steering Sam and Miles away from that door and down the hall.

"We have to search for other passengers," Epps reminded them.

The two boys nodded, following the soldier as they walked close to each other. The first room they entered showed another mech, looking much like the first one, except this one was slumped against the wall and his spark chamber was wide open. From their angle it was very obviously extinguished, so they left that room behind.

The next room seemed to be the med-bay; when they entered it they could see a couple of berths. One was occupied, a Cybertronian with an oddly shaped frame laying on top of it. It was the first femme any of them had seen outside of simulated images. Next to her was a mech, half slumped over her prone form. She was battered and war torn, but the mech was in reasonably good shape. There was no question the femme was dead, but Epps moved in closer to check the mech.

Sam swallowed, whispering. "Primus. Bee, he told me about sparkmates, where if one offlines then the second one usually does, too."

Both teens averted their eyes, Epps returning to them and shaking his head to signal that the mech was dead. He put one hand on one of both of their shoulder's.

"C'mon, boys, let's go." He whispered softly, gently leading them out of the room.

He was a soldier, had been for years. The sight of the two like that wouldn't get to him now, not in a moment where he needed to be calm and head cleared of irrational emotions, but it would later. He knew the teens couldn't exactly help themselves; he didn't say anything when Sam's eyes misted over as the teen looked back at the two Cybertronians over his shoulder.

They were about to enter one of the last rooms when Miles heard something that sounded odd, breaking the quiet of the Neutral ship. It was coming from the very last room in the corridor and he turned towards it.

"Do you guys hear that?"

Epps nodded, "It sounds like Cybertronian! Let's check it out."

The three practically sprinted towards the room, but had to stop when they reached the door. It was closed tight, the keypad was far above all of their heads and even if it had been in reach none of them would have known the correct code. The pounded on it, hoping whoever inside would open up, and after a moment the door slid open. They rushed in, only to stop in shock. It was another femme, this one alive, and desperately reaching out to them as she spoke in broken Cybertronian. From her wounds and the pain in her optics it was obvious she wouldn't last long, they couldn't even tell how she'd managed to open the door with the state she was in.

"She's gonna die if she doesn't get help now! We need Ratchet for this, there's too much going on!" Miles exclaimed worriedly, taking a deep breath before screaming. "TRAILBREAKER GET YOUR AFT IN HERE!"

The femme flinched at the sudden unexpected loud tone, her whirling and clicking getting more frantic as the sound of running peds could be heard. Trailbreaker entered, staring in shock at the femme for a moment.

"I'll comm Ratchet," Trailbreaker said in clear English, for the benefit of the humans, and then he switched to Cybertronian, telling the femme he would be calling the best medic around. The femme keened as he did so and after a moment Trailbreaker started using a long list of human cuss words. "He's under fire, I gotta go bring him here! You guys work on her, you'll be able to seal any wounds better than me."

And with that he ran back out. Epps was at a momentary loss as to what they should do, he could read the panicked expressions on Miles' and Sam's faces. Miles had said that there was too much going on for them to handle, but they had still been trained and they could still use that.

"You're the medics!" Epps snapped at them, watching both of them jump at his harsh tone. "Get to work! Give Ratchet a little less to worry about when he comes in here!"

Miles reacted first, sliding off his backpack and pulling out the large tool kit that he had stowed inside. He held it up to the femme to show where Ratchet had put the symbols that meant 'organic medic helpers' on it. Sam moved closer to the femme, sliding his own pack off and pulling his tool kit out as well. He stopped when the femme reached out and wrapped a gentle, but shaking, servo around him, clicking and whirling at him desperately. He stared at her with wide eyes, unsure of how best to respond.

After a few moments the femme seemed to get that he couldn't understand her, letting out a frustrated and pain filled screech. The next second all three humans could feel the kind of scan Ratchet tended to avoid, this one being more thorough and personal as it didn't just take their temperature and the hormones they were putting off, but instead went bone deep. Using her other hand she pointed at a body lying underneath some rubble, the humans looking at it obediently. It was a lot smaller then a normal Cybertronian and it was obvious a previous shot from the Decepticon ship had made some of the Neutral's ship collapse on to it.

Miles gasped, "Is that a sparkling?"

Sam and Epps gaped at Miles, looking back to the little body once more. There was no way it could have survived that. The metal itself was unsalvageable; they could just barely recognize what the pile of metal was supposed to be for. There attention was drawn back to the femme when she let out a tiny keen, her chestplates moving aside to reveal her spark. Orbiting around it was another, tinier spark.

"Fucking Primus, the sparkling is still inside of her!" Epps couldn't help how horrified he sounded, "The body she would have put it in is destroyed!"

Miles and Sam shared a horrified look. Epps had been given a more extensive version of the Cybertronian birds and bees than the two teens had. They didn't need to know what a sparkling orbiting around a spark looked like, after all, because there was simply no way they could do anything about it.

The femme moved again, this time grabbing Miles in her servo. He couldn't help the small pained sound he gave when she then shoved him into the same servo she was using to hold Sam. The two were squashed together almost painfully so she could hold them, and she put them closer to her spark chamber, clicking and whirling frantically. The two watched as her own spark dimmed a bit, the tiny spark beside it doing the same a moment later. The femme and her sparkling were dying and she didn't have a body to transfer it to.

Tentatively Miles reached out, touching the tiny sparkling. A jolt of electricity ran through him as soon as his hand brushed against the spark, but it was Sam and Epps that gave a startled cry.

"What the _hell_ just shocked me?" Epps asked, looking around for anything dangerous. Sam followed suit, looking around wildly, and Miles was about to say something when the femme started to speak once more.

"Please, _please_, help my baby! My sparkling, you have to save my sparkling!" The femme begged, but she was still speaking in Cybertronian. They could hear the distinctive whirls and clicks of the language, but it was like their minds were automatically changing it to a language they could understand. They all looked at one another to make sure it wasn't just them individually and that they weren't going insane. "My mate—dead! I will die! My sparkling, please save him!"

Sam squirmed in her grasp, trying to get out to do something, to do anything. If the femme released him and let him look her over then maybe he could keep her alive long enough for Ratchet to arrive. The chances of the medic being able to do anything was slim, but it was more than anything he could offer her. But he couldn't help the thought that he would do anything to help her save her sparkling.

And that was when their worlds seemed to dissolve around them.

* * *

Will growled to himself, hiding behind Ironhide as he fumbled to reload. Fig was crouched on the ground near him, grumbling things in Spanish. There had been no less than six Decepticons on the Decepticon ship, all coming out extremely angry and ready to fight them. Almost immediately they had managed to damage one of the twins, leaving Ratchet occupied and the other half of the set furious and on a rampage.

A shock jolted through his left arm, making him drop both his gun and the sabette rounds in surprise as his hand seized up. Fig looked over to him with barely concealed worry, but Will just stood up, shaking his arm out and smacking his Guardian on the back of his leg.

"IRONHIDE!" Will shouted, turning to glare up at the back of the black GMC truck. "What the hell just shocked me?"

Ironhide didn't even look at him, intent on guarding them while Ratchet did some patch ups on Sideswipe. Trailbreaker was by the Medic's side, trying to get his attention away from his current patient. He started to talk to Optimus in Cybertronian, and Will was about to yell again, when he could suddenly understand what was being said.

"-wrong with Will." Ironhide informed his Prime, Will listening to the distinct sounds that made up the language but now able to discern words from them. "Should I get him out of here towards the Neutral ship?"

"That may be best if something is ailing him," Optimus replied, "We do not want to lose one of the tiny organics."

Will practically snarled, "Okay, what the _slag_ is going on? You are not taking me away from the fi-!"

He froze as his world dissolved around him, but to the others he just froze. Eyes wide open and unblinking, mouth still open as if to frame the rest of the word fight. The only movement he made was to breathe.

"Ironhide, something is wrong with Will!" Fig went over to his Captain quickly, trying to catch the man's attention.

"RATCHET! WILL NEEDS YOU!" Ironhide yelled, bending down to scan the Captain's body multiple times.

* * *

They were all there in that unknown place. They could all sense each other but didn't know how. They knew that wherever they were was safe. There was no light, but it wasn't dark. It wasn't cold or hot, dry or wet. It just __was___._ They realized that wherever they were it didn't involve bodies, but that realization faded into the background. It didn't feel weird. Just natural, comforting even. There wouldn't be anything happening to them in this place. It didn't feel empty, but comfortable. All four of them were there and that felt just right. They had each other.

And then came pieces of a thought that Sam had put together not long ago, echoing in the place that wasn't anything but was everything at the same time_._

__Save the sparkling!__

And with it came the knowledge to Will in images and feelings. Feelings from all three. Feelings from the femme. Feelings from the tiny spark that wanted nothing more than to live. The others just felt the feelings from each other, Will, the femme, and the sparkling that wasn't.

Then there was nothing; almost hesitantly Miles sent emotions towards all of them. Fear, confusion, sorrow, pain, guilt, hope, no hope. Desire—the want—to do something, anything. They sent agreement back, attached with whatever other emotions they were feeling. There was a lot of confusion, some fear coming from the younger of the four, and some anger coming from the older of the four.

Then Epps sent them Optimus' voice, the sound once more echoing around them. A conversation the two had together when Will had been sick and Epps had been filling in for his duties.

__There have been little to no sparklings since the beginning of the war, Robert. And that was long before your planet was even made. In fact, I believe Bumblebee has never seen an actual sparkling besides in the data we used to teach him with while raising him. He was just going into younglinghood himself when the war started. But even before that there were fewer and fewer sparklings being made due to the decline, and the way things seemed to be heading. A sparkling was seen as a bless; if one was to be found or created in this time there would be much enjoyment and it would be a sign of good luck to come.__

Once the last echo had faded the idea of what would be done to save the sparkling came to them. Energy was needed and they were all more then willing.

But then Will felt a sudden pain, the place of everything and nothing flickering for just a moment. The pain whip-lashed, pinging to Sam, then Miles, and then Epps. Fear and pain became Will's dominant emotions as he tried to think over it, the place clouding his mind. Conveying things with emotions was so much easier then forming actual thoughts in their head's, but he was trained to rationalize and think through things. His mind was trying to compartmentalize, separate him enough so that he could try and focus on his actual body, which had been hurt, but the place wouldn't let him.

Fear echoed back from the other three, as well as confusion and worry.

* * *

"You are _extremely_ lucky Ratchet was not here to see that," Optimus informed his Weapons Specialist.

The medic had decided that Will would best be left with his Guardian for the time being. Trailbreaker was insistent about Ratchet coming to the Neutral ship and he had gone, but not before he had made sure that Ironhide and Optimus had both agreed that Will didn't seem to be hurt, just frozen. Bumblebee had gone with the CMO and Trailbreaker.

"I wanted to see if he would move if I flicked him," Ironhide grumbled.

"Your _flick_ just bruised his ribs and knocked him over, gilipollas!" Fig cursed at him.

"You get to explain it to him and Ratchet," Optimus said simply, saying nothing when Ironhide threatened to flick Fig for his insult.

* * *

In the place that was everything and nothing at the same time Will tried to convey something through his sudden and confusing pain. On the third try he managed to send the right emotions. Tired, patient, experienced, optimistic. He aimed this at the two teens. Then he sent the feeling of wanting more to them, followed by exhaustion.

It clicked for Sam quicker and the teen sent agreement, Miles sending a similar emotion soon after once he finally understood. The teens would give most of the energy, the soldiers only giving some so when they came back to wherever they were going they'd be more ready to get up and fight if need be. Epps sent a pleased feeling at all of them, followed by pride.

Then everything started to fade, and the last thing anything any of them got was a single name. Then the place that was everything and nothing seemed to eject them out of it.

* * *

"The Allspark energy in them is building up to a startling level, Ratchet." Bumblebee noted, trying to sound calm though the worry in his optics gave him away.

"Frag it all!" Ratchet snarled.

Entering the ship and walking past the sparkless frames of four Cybertronians had saddened the CMO. Entering the final recharge station to see the femme had dashed any hope he'd had left. He knew there was no way to save the sparkling, though the femme had kept pleading with him. He had finally given in and used forced overrides to put her into stasis. The only help it gave her was taking away the pain and worry in her final moments of death; it did little to comfort him as he could do nothing to help save her, either.

To make it worse, he had entered to find the three humans all looking very much like the Captain. Miles and Sam had been in the femme's servo; the blonde organic frozen with his left arm half raised towards the femme, Sam in place next to him with wide eyes and head turned away from the two. The medic had needed to take them away from her to ensure she wouldn't hurt them. He'd laid them gently on the ground but no matter what he did he couldn't lower Miles' arm or turn Sam's head straight. Epps was standing on his own a few feet away from the femme, narrow eyed and stuck in a somewhat defensive and tensed up stance.

"I don't know what's going on," Ratchet admitted softly.

He had been old even before the war had started, managing to survive the ensuing calamity with good luck and a well trained processor. Little had managed to surprise him in all his years, but it was his time on this little mudball of a planet that had started to through him for a loop for the first time in his life. The organics provided nothing but surprises and aggravations; he had no idea what to do for them when they seemed to be in a frozen state with energy that had no business being anywhere in them was steadily growing.

"Ratchet scan them and keep your scans on them," Bumblebee ordered, "It's like the energy's traveling through them and heading towards the femme!"

Ratchet could hear the awe and slight confusion in the Scout's voice. He focused his scans on the two teens first; Sam and Miles were practically bathed in the energy. It lit up their bodies and seemed to be slowly leaving them, dancing across their skin before lifting off of them into the air. He then turned to focus on the Sergeant and found the same thing happening, although he still wasn't up to par with the two teenagers.

Bumblebee had been right, of course. All the energy coming from the three humans was heading straight towards the femme. The CMO watched in surprise as a bright light started to leak through the femme's spark chamber, making both him and the Scout tense for what came next. The light was strong enough to be blinding even to their well adapted optics, both sending out an alert to their fellow Autobots as the temperature in the room began to spike and the excess energy in the air began to crackle, sparks dancing along the femme's frame.

* * *

"What the fuck is wrong with him?" Fig demanded angrily, kneeling next to the eerily frozen form of his Captain.

He didn't need to be a Cybertronian to know that something had changed. Both Ironhide and Optimus had started to talk almost frantically towards each other in Cybertronian; when Fig had touched Will he could feel the man burning up. He knew it to be even worse when the other three Autobots had wandered over, having either chased off the remaining three Decepticons or offlined them.

"I do not know," Optimus replied gently, "My scans only show that he has a lot more Allspark energy then before. It seems to be dispersing to somewhere."

"And what the frag does that mean?" Ironhide asked worriedly, pacing next to the two organics.

"I am no medic, old friend. I can not say, but..."

Optimus trailed off and Fig looked at him in mild concern. At first he had thought that perhaps whatever was affecting Will had transferred to the Prime as he just stayed still, but he was relieved when the large mech turned to three of his soldiers.

"Trailbreaker, Sideswipe, Sunstreaker: stay here and make sure the Decepticons do not come back. Guard William and Figueroa." The Autobot leader ordered.

Fig was about to protest this, wanting to know what the fuck was going on, when a large black servo came towards him and grabbed up his Captain.

"Just guard Fig," Ironhide corrected, holding his Charge firmly in hand.

Optimus didn't bother to protest; Ironhide had already taken off sprinting towards the Neutral ship. He shifted into his alt mode and started after his Weapons Specialist, leaving Fig behind with three equally confused Autobots.

* * *

Ironhide and Optimus neared the Neutral ship almost in unison, slowing down from their quick pace as they got closer because of the worrying sight in front of them. A bright light seemed to have engulfed the entirety of the inside of the ship, some of it shining through the open plating seams and the holes that had been made in the hull. A scan revealed the light to be completely made up of energy, a shocking amount that had no reason to be there. The entire ship creaked, seeming to expand as the energy inside of it peaked, before it started to slowly recede back inside.

Together they stepped inside of the ship, heedless of any threats that waited for them within. In fact they followed the nearly blinding wall of energy, walking down the hall it was disappearing into quickly. They had to keep their optics on the ground so as not to damage them the light was so bright, Ironhide taking care to make sure Will's eyes were covered gently by one of his digits.

They reached the end of the hall to find Ratchet and Bumblebee slumped on opposite sides of the corridor. Both were just outside of the last room there, Optimus and Ironhide watching as some of the energy swirled around the pair for a moment before it too disappeared into the last room that had now revealed itself, the door to it sliding shut. Ratchet and Bumblebee both stirred instantly, Optimus kneeling in the middle of the hallway to try to assess the both of them. The CMO pushed his prodding servo away and pulling himself up slowly and the Prime vented sharply, instead helping Bumblebee to stand. The Scout opened a private comm between the four of them.

_**:I don't know what happened, Optimus.:**_ Bumblebee sounded dazed, _**:Just a moment ago we were in that room with a dying femme, Epps, Sam, and Miles. All three of them were practically drowning in Allspark energy and it was going straight towards the femme. Then there was a bright light and I think I was forced out of the room, but I can't say by what, and it didn't hurt. Then I just offlined.:**_

_**:It was the same for me,: **_Ratchet assured the Scout.

_**:Will started to give off a bunch of energy, too.: **_Ironhide stated,_** :But we couldn't tell where it was going. What the frag is going on?:**_

None of them had an answer for the Weapons Specialist. Ratchet suggested that they go in and retrieve the humans to check them over, but when they tried to open the door it wouldn't budge. All of them were reluctant to use force because they couldn't be certain where the bodies of the organics lay; Ratchet thought he had a pretty good idea but that meant Epps could be crushed by the door if they forced it and it fell inwards.

Ironhide made a noise then, gesturing wordlessly to his servo when the other three turned to look at him in confusion. Will seemed to be unfrozen now, eyes having slid shut and the Captain having seemed to go boneless against the servo he was in, lying as he properly should in his seemingly unconscious state. Then he let out a groan, blinking a few times.

"Now that was wild," Will muttered to himself, groaning again as he used one hand to prop himself up.

The Captain looked up when he realized that he was on a large servo, surprised to see four sets of intense blue optics studying him. Ironhide was looking at him with concern, but he saw Ratchet start to reach out for him and he quickly slid forward enough so that he could jump off of his Guardian's servo to the ground.

"Wait a second!" Will snapped at the medic angrily.

Ratchet froze, all of the Autobots continuing to look at Will, but now they were staring at him in shock. Not only had he jumped out of Ironhide's servo, which the mech would normally berate him for, but he had outright denied Ratchet, the Chief Medical Officer. He knew he should explain, he even opened his mouth to do so, but then he though better of it. The soldier ignored them, walking towards the door he could see in front of them.

It slid open and the Captain walked right in, the door sliding closed behind him and making him disappear from sight. Ratchet let out a disgusted sound, storming towards the door. The medic was determined that he force his way in now, but as soon as he neared it the door slid open once more. They all went inside the room, looking around in shock.

In the middle of the room was a sparkling body that seemed to be in perfect condition. Sam and Miles were the closest to it, the two teens lying on the ground and staring at the ceiling with half-lidded eyes. Epps was sitting on the ground near the femme's body, grinning up at his Captain who had just walked over to him. The femme's body remained where it had been up against the wall, though some plating and other parts was missing.

"Scan 'im," Epps told the flabbergasted Autobots.

In their shock each of them listened, stepping closer to the sparkling lying on the floor. Their scans registered the little mechling as alive and healthy, though Ratchet's picked up that he would need energon soon. They all looked at the Sergeant and Captain, Epps seeming to take entirely too much enjoyment out of them being the ones shocked for once.

"Alright, men, who besides me barely remembers what happened?" Will asked, turning to his fellow humans and still ignoring the Autobots.

Epps grinned to show his agreement. Miles just nodded weakly as he struggled to sit up, using Sam to do so. Sam groaned, mumbling his own agreement as he continued to lay there.

"Okay, good." Will sighed in relief, "Not just me then. Who else has a name nagging the shit out of them for this little guy?"

All three nodded in response this time, Sam finally managing to get himself into an upright position with Miles' help. Bumblebee took another step closer to the two teenagers and the sparkling on the floor, torn between confusion and excitement. Then excitement won out.

"Name him whatever you want, it's an _actual_ sparkling!" Bumblebee chirped happily, practically running the last few tiny steps and dropping to his knee struts in his rush to examine the tiny Cybertronian more closely.

Ironhide moved next to the excited Scout, staring in amazement at the sparkling with him. Sam watched his Guardian with mild amusement, glancing over to Will and getting a nod from him.

"Orion," Sam spoke up softly.

"That..." Optimus stared at the humans, looking about as dumbfounded as a Cybertronian could. "That was my name before the matrix chose me. Orion Pax."

Ratchet looked from his leader, to the humans, to the sparkling and the two Autobots currently examining it.

"Just..." Ratchet was at a loss of words, "What the slag is going on?"

Will just gave a shrug in reply, walking over to Bumblebee and Ironhide to examine the sparkling himself. That name was one of the only clear things that they could remember, followed by the knowledge that they had all been together. Ratchet moved closer as well, going over the sparkling and starting to talk about what he would need.

Sam and Miles just decided to lay back down and let the adults and the Autobots do the talking. They had woken up with some energy, but whatever they'd had left was quickly leaving them. It wasn't long before both fell asleep, feeling utterly drained, but satisfied by somehow saving the sparkling, even if it would never make sense to them. They were both sound asleep before the 'bots and the soldiers had even started talking about what would happen next, because they talked of the sparkling first.


	22. Chapter 21

"What's going on?"

Bumblebee looked up in surprise, startled by Barricade's appearance. After what had happened at the destroyed Neutral ship they had all come back to base, but with some minor urgency. It hadn't taken them long to figure out that, no matter what they did, they couldn't get either Sam or Miles to wake up for long again. Ratchet used an invasive scan and found out that their energy had been severely depleted, almost to an alarming extent, and so they had hightailed it back.

It had been a couple of hours now and neither teen had shown any noticeable improvement. Epps and Will were faring much better than the two of them in that they were awake and could stay so, though they were obviously tired out. Neither of them could explain what had happened very well, but both were unsurprised at the teens' conditions. And outside of worrying about all four humans, there was the sparkling that had to be looked after. Ironhide had immediately figured out a shift schedule for watching Orion, and what little energon they had for the sparkling was being found and set aside. Ratchet and Wheeljack had talked a little bit about taking some of the other energon and trying to distill into sparkling formula, or something close to it, but it had yet to be done.

The Scout had just been walking from the recharge hangar, having caught a half hour to re-energize himself, when Barricade had stepped out of his hangar and startled him so. Almost immediately he felt bad, because he didn't think any of them had thought about the 'con.

Barricade growled, "Answer me, Scout. Where's the organic? He's not responded to my texts."

Feeling somewhat ashamed, Bumblebee filled him in on what had happened. He wasn't surprised at all when Barricade seemed to grow more and more angry as he went on, but he was surprised when the 'con demanded his comm frequency and nearly everymech else's. And then, to appease him some, the Scout took him to where Orion was and let him have the next shift to watch over the sparkling.

* * *

Miles slowly woke up, instantly regretting his return to consciousness as pain hit him. His head pounded—he'd never had a migraine before but he'd bet anything that it was what he was experiencing now—and his body felt stiff and sore, like he'd exercised for far too long. His throat felt raw and dry, his eyelids unusually heavy. When he finally could manage to open his eyes, even the dim lighting in the room was enough to make him wince and his migraine increase momentarily. He pushed through it, though, trying to peer through narrowed eyes to figure out where he was. It was somewhat familiar, but disconcerting in that he couldn't remember why since it wasn't a place he frequented often.

It wasn't until he allowed what he was hearing around him to register that he realized where he was. The steady drip of an IV, the beeping of a heart monitor. He was in the med-bay, the human med-bay. He had been in it only on tour; he had been in Ratchet's med-bay far more often, be it for himself or any Cybertronian that didn't mind his presence there. When he tried to recall how he had essentially ended up in a hospital bed, he had to think hard. He could just barely remember the mission at this point, something to do with Decepticons and Neutrals and a fight. Everything after they had arrived to wait at the wide expanse of desert was blurry; the pounding in his head grew so strong that he had to just give up thinking altogether for a moment.

He could hear the steady tempo of his heart monitor start to quicken, a loud beep sounding after it. Miles almost flinched, but he realized it didn't do anything to actually make his migraine worse, and flinching would have taken entirely too much effort. After a moment he could hear movement by his bedside, followed by several clicks. About a minute later and the pounding in his head started to fade to something more manageable, letting him crack open his eyes again.

"Awake at last," A familiar voice drawled from beside him.

Miles didn't need to look to know it was Barricade, but he did anyway, carefully turning his head to look at the mech's holoform. While the human med-bay had been built big enough for Cybertronians, in case Ratchet decided he was need, it was preferred that holoforms were used while inside of it.

"How do you feel?" Barricade asked quietly, that letting Miles know the 'con somehow knew about his headache.

"Like I was tackled by thirty football players and then a herd of buffalo went on a stampede, the only ground available being my head." Miles rasped out, cracking a grin.

Barricade gave a soft snort, "The one time Sam woke up he said it felt like Optimus and Megatron had drank too much high-grade and decided to do the tango on his body, also mostly around his cranial region."

"How long have I been out?" Miles asked, trying to convince himself that sitting up was worth the effort.

"Three days," Barricade replied. "Samuel just woke up earlier this morning. You two have been essentially comatose since falling asleep in that ship; we figured out that once he woke up he was in pain, but the foolish human doctor had nothing prepared for him. I think the Insect nearly made him wet his pants because of it."

Miles smiled a bit, too tired to laugh. "That's why you knew what to do for me, I take it?"

"Indeed. Increased heart rate either meant you were in pain or panicking, and as you had no reason to panic it was the former."

"The sparkling?" Miles questioned, voice rasping. He had to swallow several times just to try to wet his throat.

"Wait."

The teen stared after the holoform in confusion as Barricade just walked away, leaving him to do just what the 'con had ordered. He came back quickly, a glass of water in his hand, and Miles did his best not to grin because he knew it would annoy him. He sat up then, forcing his limbs to work even as they protested, and took the glass from Barricade with a quite thanks before drinking from it, looking at the holoform expectantly.

"Orion is fine," Barricade responded. "We're not exactly sure _how,_ of course, but it seems that we never are with you organics."

"Will and Epps?" It wasn't descriptive, but Barricade seemed to understand what he wanted.

"Fine, though more tired than usual. Ratchet decided to keep them in here just in case. But..." Barricade frowned, "The Allspark energy that was within all four of you is still there, but changed. It seems to have adapted to your bodies better and leveled out. It's almost as if all of you have spark signatures, though they don't read exactly right. It's odd."

"Sam and me?"

"Severe depletion in just about everything that gives the human body energy. The incompetent organic doctor had you both on intravenous therapy to try to combat that and restore your nutrient levels to what they should be and it seemed to be doing fine, but when Sam woke up with a severe migraine even Ratchet was left confused. We were able to treat his symptoms, all of which you seem to be presenting with, but unable to find a proper cause. It appears that, despite the IV, neither of you are where you should be energy wise."

Miles took a moment to soak that in, finishing off his glass of water. Barricade took it from him without comment, the teen relaxing back against his pillow. Lifting himself up into a sitting position and staying like that had taken more effort then he had anticipated, the teen not realizing just how tired he was until he couldn't be bothered to keep himself sitting up any longer. Not even the water seemed to energize him.

"Energon," Miles suggested.

"Don't be stupid," Barricade growled. "That won't do you any good and Ratchet'd have my helm."

The teen took a moment to study the holoform. Barricade looked about as normal as ever, a scowl on his face that showed his irritation, and sometimes it was hard to remember that the 'con used anger as a defense of sorts to hide what he was really feeling. Sometimes he had to take a step back and look at the situation and how he'd feel about it. They were friends, after all, and if it had been Barricade in his place then he would have been worried, maybe even afraid for him. And maybe that's why the 'con had been there for when he'd woken up. Reassurance for the both of them.

"I won't tell if you don't," Miles promised. "Unless it works, because then we're giving it to Sam, too."

* * *

Miles' suggestion would turn out to be right, in the end. After Barricade sequestered a small glass of energon for him and the teen drank it he had improved quickly. Quickly enough that within the hour he was wanting to get out of the bed and prove it to the CMO himself, suddenly restless. The 'con had called Ratchet in then just to keep Miles in place. The medic, while annoyed that the two had done such a potentially stupid thing without bothering to even tell him, had been pleased to see Miles' improved condition, and quickly comm'd Bumblebee to get the mech to get a glass for his Charge.

The only drawback seemed to be that it worked a little too well, though the sudden increase in energy inevitably led to a sort of crash when their levels started to drop back down into a normal range. They found this out when Miles went from walking around the room wide awake to sitting in a chair and falling asleep almost as soon as he had leaned his head against the wall. When Barricade had tried to the stir the teen he'd gotten a few responses, but it hadn't taken any of them long to figure out that Miles was still asleep because he suddenly went from answering something normally to talking about a pig.

Ratchet had worried, at first, that this would develop in to a sort of pattern unless they were able to dial down how much energy the energon suddenly seemed to be giving them, talking with Wheeljack about perhaps giving them something similar to what Orion was receiving, but his fears were alleviated the next day when Miles and Sam both woke up feeling a lot better.

The medic had decided to keep them in the human med-bay for the rest of the day and following night despite how much better they were feeling, promising them that they would be released the following morning for Thanksgiving. He allowed them to be removed from their machines, though, giving the teens little to fuss about. The two teens accepted this without complaint.

But later that night Miles was wide awake, his legs itching to actually get up and move around. It turned out Ratchet was being more paranoid then usual, locking Epps and Will in with them to make sure they didn't drop down dead wherever they happened to be if something terrible happened. He was also personally coming in every three hours, so Miles had to make sure to watch the clock to know when was best to plan the escape.

Now it was about two in the morning and he finally decided to wake up Sam, handing him a pair of clothes that he'd gotten Fig to sneak in an hour before when Ratchet had visited with him. The two carefully crept out of the med-bay, doing their best to stay quiet. They had to pass a sleeping Will and Epps on the way out, and Miles knew, from what little Fig had told him, that there was a nameless male nurse that was there supposed to be watching over them as well, and that he was also asleep, but at the desk. As long as they could get past him and their other adult companions without waking them up, then they were home free.

The two were almost to the door when a familiar voice rang out.

"Ratchet has stated you two are to stay here," Barricade drawled, the teens freezing mid-step.

Miles turned to look at the 'male' nurse with an annoyed expression, Sam just looking slightly baffled and mostly disappointed.

"You fragger, that's cheating!" Miles accused, "Changing your holoform is dirty!"

Barricade's holoform smirked, "Decepticon here, or have you forgotten, _squishy_?"

"Decepticon, not the-faction-that-follows-Ratchet." Miles huffed in reply, glaring at Barricade.

"Wrenchers," Sam offered with a snort.

"In my case it would be more like Mothers." Barricade admitted, glowering at them both as he did so, blaming them entirely.

"If the Mothers splits up you are _so_ a Lancaster, you aft." Miles told him.

"My mom won't care if I let her baby me a bit, not even that if we don't manage any trouble." Sam shrugged, "We want to go see Orion."

"No." Was the simple reply, Barricade reclining once more in the chair he had claimed.

"But Barry," Miles started to whine. "We've been good boys, we earned it!"

Sam smirked at his friend's tone, just leaning against the wall. He knew how stubborn Miles could be. He also knew that for some unexplainable reason Barricade seemed to be somewhat wrapped around his little pinkie, so he knew that they'd be allowed to leave. It took a bit longer than he expected for Miles to break the 'con down, nearly two entire minutes of back and forth before Barricade caved. Miles cheered loudly without thinking, freezing when Will yelled at him to shut up.

Sam snickered, "Smooth move, there. Can we go now?"

Barricade's holoform dissolved without saying anything, the two taking this as a sign to leave the human med-bay. As they walked to the Autobot section of NEST Barricade's bipedal form joined them, leading them to the sparkling's room. He explained to them a bit of what they had missed and where and why they had decided to put Orion where they did. He also warned them about what would be coming up.

Ratchet would be running a lot of tests on them, having already performed some on Epps and Will. The debriefing had been put on hold until Sam and Miles could join it, since if all four humans who had experienced whatever it was that had happened were there they might be able to remember something from what another might end up saying.

Halfway there they were met by Bumblebee, the Autobot Scout picking Sam up almost immediately and scanning him.

"Jeez, Bee," Sam huffed half-heartedly. "I'm fine."

"Ratchet said you were not to be up and about yet," Bumblebee replied, but he fell into step beside Barricade anyway as his scans told him that Sam was alright.

Miles snorted, "Ratchet's a slaggin' mother hen. I'll almost feel bad for Orion the first time he gets a scraped knee or something."

"Poor sparkling won't even be allowed to move," Barricade agreed with a laugh, causing Miles to grin up at him. The 'con was at least relaxing enough around Bumblebee to laugh about something so simple.

"More like whoever let Orion get a scraped knee will be slagged to the pit, brought back, slagged again by whoever else wants to, and then left there." Bumblebee replied with a grin, "And then he will not be allowed to move."

"Primus help them." Sam laughed, "But this will be really cool. Orion will have a Cybertronian family and a human family. Is anyone going to be playing creator?"

"I imagine it will be like how it was with me. A group effort, though Ironhide and I imagine Prowl will be the most mother hen-ish, as you call it." The Scout laughed when the two teens did a double take at Ironhide, "Ironhide has some of the strongest Guardian protocols around, one reason he's also known as Optimus' bodyguard. Prowl has actually helped raise a sparkling that he adopted from Praxun, a city on Cybertron. Both he and the sparkling, Bluestreak, are Praxian, so they both lost their homes at the same time."

"The gunner?" Barricade asked, getting a nod from Bumblebee. He smirked, "He shot Starscream in the aft. I like him."

"Awesome shot, great personality, but he can talk anyone's ear off. I pray to Primus that he and Blurr never somehow make a sparkling together, no one would be able to understand that thing." Bumblebee joked, grinning once more when the teens laughed and Barricade snorted.

"So what are they like? Optimus, Ratch, Hide, and whoever else raised you?" Miles asked, still on the ground and walking. He was doing well enough to keep up with the two Cybertronians, trailing slightly behind as he didn't want to make the effort to jog and keep up with them.

"It was mainly Optimus, Ratchet, and Ironhide. There were other mechs, certainly, but they were the main three." Bumblebee explained, "Both Optimus and Ironhide tended to let me get away with whatever I wanted. Ratchet was the one who had to crack down and punish me if I got out of hand, since Ironhide and Optimus tended to crack if I pulled out the big guns, so to speak. I became even worse once Jazz started to stay on with us and taught me how to prank, sneak around without being noticed, and so on. When I first got hurt it would be Ironhide who fussed the most, Ratchet who fussed the longest, and Optimus who got me away when I got cranky at them, or who distracted me with energon goodies. Ironhide tended to give me whatever I wanted, while Optimus would hold back a bit, but would be more lenient with letting me stay up late and run around."

"So those three have been together for awhile?" Sam asked, leaning back in Bumblebee's servo.

"Yes. Ratchet and Ironhide are older, born around the same time if I'm not mistaken, give or take a few years. Speaking of Ironhide, I believe he is with the sparkling now. We take shifts, generally, when the sparkling is supposed to be asleep." A pause before he glanced to Barricade with amusement, "Everyone was a bit surprised about how well our little 'con acted with the sparkling, he almost rivals Ironhide. In fact, the two have even teamed together to yell at Skids and Mudflap for saying slag around Orion. Who would have guessed Barricade was a softie for children?"

Barricade growled, "You should not tell them lies, insect."

"Well that explains why he went for Miles." Sam grinned.

"Hey!" Came Miles indignant reply, though it was ignored as Bumblebee laughed and Sam snickered. Barricade just smirked.

The three kept walking, Sam comfortable in Bumblebee's servo and the Autobot content with letting Miles walk unless he appeared to get tired or asked to be helped. They got to Orion's room, a big plaque on the door stating his name in Cybertronian glyphs and in English. Bumblebee went right inside, Barricade and Miles following. Ironhide looked at them over the top of a data pad he was reading, glaring at them and putting a finger up to his mouth to gesture quiet. On his lap lay Orion, recharging peacefully. Bumblebee grinned.

"Thought Ratchet said he wanted Orion to start sleeping on his own berth?" Bumblebee asked.

Ironhide kept up his glare, "He was so lonely. Practically called for me."

"Projecting much?" Bumblebee snorted, setting Sam down. Miles was already next to the Weapons Specialist, attempting to climb his legs to get closer to Orion. "I believe you two will be the first humans he actually interacts with. So far we've kept him at bay. We wanted all four of his saviors to be here, but of course you two just couldn't wait."

"Us, wait? Think you got us mixed up with someone else there, Bee." Sam replied, grinning up at his Guardian before high tailing it over and climbing up Ironhide's leg as well. The Weapons Specialist just grunted a bit, putting the data pad down to watch.

Miles stopped near to the sparkling, but far enough away he wouldn't wake it up, and just made himself comfortable. Sam did the same. The three mechs watched in amusement as the two teens made little comments back and forth to each other over how the sparkling looked and how it would need a paint job. Right now it was just the basic metallic grey.

"That's because generally the parents would decide, or the sparkling would be given the parents' colors. However the colors happened to be lime green and red for the mech and pink and purple for the femme. We're currently fighting over the colors, but we do intend to include at least one of his original creator's coloring." Bumblebee explained. "We cleaned off the paint that he had on before."

"Before?" Sam asked, trying to think back. He and Miles had been lying on the floor instead of looking at the sparkling, just happy he was alive, and dead tired from the energy drain. This brought another question to his mind. "How did he get his body anyway?"

The three mechs started to talk in Cybertronian, causing Sam to huff in annoyance. Miles grinned at him, but the grin faltered for a moment. He leaned in close to Sam, whispering in his friend's ear.

"Think about understanding them, like how we did before we all went to that place."

Sam hesitated just a bit, before listening to his friend. He concentrated, and after a moment he began to understand them again, though he would miss a few words, and it was hard to keep it up. If he tried hard enough he could get the gist of what they were saying. He shared a look with Miles and both of them grinned. No way were they going to say anything, in fact they would get Will and Epps alone and tell them about it. They figured the older males would be more then willing to keep quiet if it meant being able to understand the Cybertronians when they went on a 'human need not hear' tangent.

Miles decided to do what they usually would: complain about being left out of the conversation. No need to make them suspicious, or more likely worry that the teens were still tired.

"Guys, humans here!" Miles complained, "No speak Cybertronian!"

Ironhide and Barricade looked pointedly at Bumblebee, causing the Scout to vent softly.

"While you guys were out your bodies started to produce an alarming amount of Allspark energy, which seemed to leave you and go elsewhere. I presume this was Orion's spark, strengthening it and stabilizing it even as his creator femme's spark was dying. He was not yet ready for separation, which would make him like a premature baby on your world. You somehow also managed to get him a body made together in a short amount of time, parts from his femme creator and his mech creator helping out. We honestly have no idea, and I think Primus must have been smiling down on us and teasing us at the same time because there was a light so bright even we couldn't really see much until our optics adjusted, and by then it was basically too late." A pause, almost hesitant, before asking, "What was it like, this other place you guys have mentioned?"

Sam opened his mouth to reply, but was cut off by Miles.

"Fucking crazy," Miles declared. "Megatron was made to serve us refreshments in a maid's outfit, Orion's creators were there crying, we met Primus-"

"You lost us at Megatron in a maid's outfit," Bumblebee told him, making both Sam and Miles laugh.

"Think we should have Sunny paint it and send it to Prowl?" Sam asked, grinning.

Bumblebee was about to reply, when Orion suddenly gave a loud cry and continued to do so, startling both the teens and the Cybertronians.

Miles stared at the crying sparkling with wide eyes, "What's wrong with him?"

"You guys came and I forgot to get his late night energon," Ironhide grumbled, sounding slightly upset.

"Sam and I will go get Ratchet to mix him the right type," Bumblebee assured him, picking up his Charge before he could protest.

"I don't want to go see the Hatchet, I've been disobeying orders!" Sam whined, trying to escape even though he knew it was futile.

Miles laughed at his friend, which seemed to draw Orion's attention because his cries quieted as he stared at Miles with wide optics. It made him wonder if the sparkling had seen any humans at all yet, or if he and Sam really were to be the first.

"Hey lil' guy," Miles greeted, reaching out and touching the sparkling gently. He was surprised when he was pulled into an awkward kind of hug by the now giggling sparkling and then squeezed. He laughed and tried to escape, but found he couldn't. "So you guys are strong even while you're little, huh?"

Barricade smirked, "Orion's just good like that."

Ironhide grunted his agreement, reaching down and gently getting Miles out of Orion's grasp, only for the sparkling to start crying loudly again. Ironhide's servo froze in midair, holding Miles up by his shirt and letting the teen dangle there. He had barely started to move his hand back down when Miles glared at him.

"Don't you _dare_ give me back to him or I _will_ be having a talk to Sarah about what actually happened to her garden."

* * *

"I'm not surprised that you two snuck out, though I am surprised Epps isn't with you." Ratchet stated softly, though just a few seconds earlier he had given Sam a glare that could have rivaled his mother's when she was really pissed off.

Sam shrugged, "Guess Epps is gettin' older."

He eyed Ratchet wearily as the doc-bot turned and started getting together Orion's energon, mumbling something about it having to be a bit different so it would be easier on his systems, though if they had nothing else he could take adult energon, apparently thinking Sam cared or wanted to know.

"The Allspark energy is gone, I take it?" Sam asked, getting comfortable in Bumblebee's servo. His tone was just slightly hopeful.

"No," Ratchet sighed. "You guys have all leveled out and appear to be even with each other."

"Oh," Sam sounded disappointed. He was happy they had saved Orion, sure, but what would this mean for them? Would it end up doing anything to them?

Bumblebee held his Charge close, "None of it seems to be having an effect on any of you. You will be alright, Sam."

Sam looked up at the familiar faceplates of his Guardian. It wasn't much to be reassured by, but there wasn't much to go off of to do said reassuring. He knew that the energy having no effect wasn't exactly true, since using it had landed all four of them in the hospital—though it was true that Epps and Will had really only been kept in there as a just in case sort of thing.

He put on a smile, at least the 'bot was trying. "Yeah."

It was relatively silent after that, Ratchet and Bumblebee occasionally talking in Cybertronian. Sam didn't even attempt to listen this time, just sitting back and watching Ratchet work. Just as Ratchet finished both he and Bumblebee received a comm link from the frequency that everyone could access, even the humans. Sam found out in the form of his phone going off with a text message telling them to come to the Communications room.

Sam figured it was from Blaster, the mech rarely left his station there, saying he'd do his job and Red Alert's, whoever Red Alert was. He looked up at Bee expectantly, and the Scout nodded, the two turning to look at Ratchet. The med-bot vented heavily, grumbling something under his breath, but nodded as well. So the three set off for the control room, meeting Optimus on the way there.

When they got there Blaster just gestured them over, and typed away quickly, pulling up a certain camera feed on one of the bigger screens so they could all see it. It was to Orion's room, all of them staring in shock at what they saw.

"Blast, could you turn up the volume?" Sam asked, body trembling as he tried not to laugh. Blaster did so. "Oh Primus, they are! They're __caramelldansen___!_"

He burst out into laughter, having to lean against Bumblebee to stay upright. It was true. Ironhide and Barricade were doing the closest version to the dance that a being made of metal could, though the look on their faces at the moment would be enough to make even Ratchet back down. Miles was standing up and helping Orion to sit up, the sparkling doing his own version as he wiggled on his aft and shook around, only being able to be labeled as cute as a button. He had a blissful look on his faceplates and Miles looked entirely too happy and pleased with himself, though after awhile it become obvious he was purposefully not looking at Ironhide and Barricade. Both Optimus and Bumblebee followed Sam's example and started to laugh.

"Orion was crying and Miles suggested one of them play some music. Somehow they got on to that song and Miles started to do the dance, Orion seeming beyond pleased with it, and well... let's just say Miles is apparently extremely convincing and both Ironhide and Barricade are absolute suckers when it comes to making a sparkling happy." Blaster said by way of explanation.

Ratchet snorted, obviously amused. "Of course it was Miles."

"Sam, I believe I might want to exchange you for Miles." Bumblebee joked, "Doubt our lil' 'con will be a problem after this and Prowl won't be hard to fight off."

Optimus laughed, "Sorry, Bumblebee. Prime comes first."

"Oh slag no, I get same species rights!" Sam smirked, "He's all _mine_, mechs."

* * *

Somewhere along the path back to Orion's room, Prowl had joined up with them. As they reached the door the Caramelldansen music could be heard drifting out, as well as Miles singing along to it, though he was off key and off the beat. Four out of the five weren't going to complain because they knew what he had managed. Poor Prowl was, once again, out of the loop.

Prowl did what he did best and prowled forwards, opening the door without makin a sound, no one bothered to think anything of it. But then they watched as he froze, apparently going unnoticed by those inside the room as the music continued. Optimus, Bumblebee, Ratchet, and Sam, who was still in Bumblebee's servo, peered around the SIC.

Miles was now sitting on the floor, slightly behind Orion as he helped the sparkling to remain sitting upright even as he wiggled and jerked around. He was singing loudly with a huge shit eating grin on his face, obviously not caring about how he sounded. Ironhide and Barricade were still doing the dance, but if it was possible their faces looked even more murderous. Orion obviously didn't care about the look on their face's, though, as he squeaked and warbled in his own sparkling speak happily, doorwings occasionally fluttering with excitement.

And then Prowl hit the floor, his glitch having acted up at the site of Ironhide and Barricade doing such a thing. The music abruptly stopped as both adult Cybertronians looked at their unexpected visitors with completely blank faceplants. Orion looked shocked, about ready to burst into his wailing again.

"Do not worry, I have told Blaster to only send the copies to the Autobot half of NEST. Very few organics will get this." Optimus told them, battle mask down to hide the smirk on his features.

Miles looked down right horrified, and slowly looked up at Barricade and Ironhide just as Orion started to wail.

"Five second head start?" The teen squeaked.

Ironhide activated his cannon, growling. "No."

The teen quickly scrambled up and started to run around the large room as Ironhide actually chased after him, putting his experience with jogging to keep up with Mason to good use for once. Of course this meant that Ironhide wasn't chasing him at full speed, hardly even picking up the pace from his normal stroll, but it was enough to have the teen running even faster.

Ratchet was trying to bring Prowl back, Optimus was attempting to calm the irate Weapons Specialist down, Sam was laughing his ass off, Bumblebee was standing and trying not to do the same, Ironhide was still chasing Miles, and Barricade was watching with a pleased look when they all froze and looked down at Orion. The sparkling was giggling and laughing happily, clapping his little servos together as he watched the chase between organic and Cybertronian.

"Oh, look. He seems to like this activity even better than the last one." Ironhide smirked, a wicked gleam in his optics.

Miles looked at Orion with a betrayed expression, before running for the door. Ironhide followed. Barricade took the sparkling energon from Ratchet and picked Orion up, beginning to feed him. He stalked out of the room to follow the two, looking entirely too pleased over the situation.

"Miles is so getting slagged one of these days," Sam said, everyone nodding in agreement. The teen grinned, "But hey, Prowl's technically out of the race for guardianship, and I doubt Barricade wants him at all. Leaves just you and Bee to duke it out, big guy."

Bumblebee grinned, "I think I'll step aside. Wouldn't want to make the leader of the Autobots look like a fool when _I_ won."

Everyone laughed, Optimus patting the young scout on the back. Then they left the room, returning to the communications room to watch the chase through the cameras.


End file.
